


Escape the Night: A Sequel

by canufeelthemagictonight



Series: Escape the Night [2]
Category: Escape the Night (Web Series), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: And Lots of It, Angst, Angst and Feels, Betrayal, Bittersweet, Bittersweet Ending, Blood and Gore, Bows & Arrows, But also, Cannibalism, Clues, Confederate Army, Dark, Dark Comedy, Death, Demons, Dimension Travel, Emotional Hurt, Evil, Funny, Gen, Giant Spiders, Gingerbread Woman, Haunted Houses, Heavy Angst, House Party, In a way, Insanity, Masquerade Ball, Monsters, Murder, Murder Mystery, Novelization, Partying, Pie, Prometheans, Psychological Trauma, Riddles, Robots, Snow and Ice, Sorceresses, Spiders, Steampunk, Time Travel, Trauma, Vampires, Victorian, War, Winter, YouTubers trapped in an evil house slowly being killed off one by one, actually your fave will almost certainly die, and if your fave doesn't die he/she will be scarred for life, based on the YouTube Red show Escape the Night with Joey Graceffa, mansion, your fave will probably die
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2018-12-10 18:11:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 55
Words: 106,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11697120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canufeelthemagictonight/pseuds/canufeelthemagictonight
Summary: A year after his house party turned into a horror movie and claimed the lives of eight close friends of his, Joey Graceffa finds himself trapped in a cursed Victorian manor by a wicked sorceress. Under her influence, he invites a new crop of guests to attend a masquerade ball on its grounds.Things go south almost as soon as they arrive.A new era. A new estate. A new evil. Everyone runs...but who will escape the night?A novelization of Season 2 of the YouTube Red showEscape the Night with Joey Graceffa.A sequel toEscape the Night: A Novelization.





	1. The Sorceress

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, before I begin, let's lay down some ground rules.  
> This is a novelization of the second season of _Escape the Night,_ a YouTube Red show. If you haven't watched the second season yet, I recommend you do so, though you can still read this fic if you haven't seen it. If you haven't watched the first season or read _Escape the Night: A Novelization,_ go do that right now and then come back.  
>  Everything that happens in the show (deaths, dialogue, etc.) happens in this story as well. I will occasionally patch up a plot hole, or fill in a missing scene with my own headcanons, but mostly, this fic will stick very closely to the original story.  
> With all that said, please sit back, relax, and enjoy _Escape the Night: A Sequel!_

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a year since the events of Season 1, and Joey Graceffa has mysteriously gone missing. Here's hoping that he doesn't run into any trouble...

"Has anyone talked to Joey Graceffa recently?" Tyler wonders aloud, his nervous blue eyes staring straight into the camera. "I feel like he has been missing in action." His hands wave around in the air as he speaks. "And he's not returning my texts...he's not returning my calls...has _anybody_ seen him?"

Andrea frowns, pauses Tyler's video, and takes a moment to search her memories for any contact with Joey in the past month. She comes up empty. Yeah, she tried to call him two weeks ago, on the one-year anniversary of his rescue from Arthur Whatshisname's weird torture house or whatever, but she only got his answering machine. At least Eva and Oli had the decency to return her "thinking of you" calls. Joey never did.

She shoots a text in Jesse's direction. _You seen Joey lately?_

 _No,_ comes the reply. _It's been 4ever._

_U worried?_

_Nah._

Typical Jesse. The guy's always so _chill_ about everything. But despite his lack of concern, Andrea can't help but wonder why Joey's being such a recluse nowadays. Is he sick? Is he still haunted by his year-old PTSD? Or...what if...

Whatever the case, Tyler’s right. It's like Joey Graceffa has disappeared off the face of the earth.

 

Joey doesn't know where he is, or how he got here, or what he's wearing, or why his head feels like it's going to split in two any moment now. All he knows is that something isn't right.

He stands at the bottom of a beautiful staircase in a house he doesn't remember. For a moment, he's worried that he's been lured back into his old 1920s mansion, but the style is different. Victorian. There's an eerie sort of beauty to it, but now's not the time to appreciate the decor. He has to get out—to leave—he can't stay here—

_Pain._

The darkness attacks his chest, and he doubles over on the ground. All the memories he's spent the last year trying to repress crowd their way into the forefront of his mind.

_Shane Dawson, poisoned. Andrea Brooks, gassed to death. Justine Ezarik, buried alive. GloZell Green, killed by a murder journal. Sierra Furtado, died during an exorcism. Matt Haag, poisoned. Timothy DeLaGhetto, shot himself. Lele Pons, electrocuted._

_It's your fault. You invited them. They're dead because of you._

Joey screams. He claws at his face, trying to force the agony out of his body. Then, a plume of black smoke erupts from his mouth, and everything goes dark.

 

The evil that was once living within Joey Graceffa is now safely secured inside the Sorceress's staff. She stares down at his unconscious body and smiles. Foolish boy. Did he _actually_ think that his problems were over just because of a silly little ritual? He should've known better.

Actually, she's _glad_ he didn't know better, because now she has what she needs to bring the world under her iron rule.

Well...almost.

She needs lives. At least nine, if not more, innocent lives from the modern day. So she takes the opportunity to sift through Joey's mind, looking for people to lure into her trap.

At first, she finds nothing but corpses. It takes about five minutes before she stumbles across images of living people: a Brit and a brunette, leaving Joey's previous house like soldiers fleeing a war zone. _Oli and Eva._ So _they_ were the ones who escaped the night with Joey Graceffa. She hopes that they enjoyed their extra year of life, because once the fun starts, she'll make sure that they're the first to go.

But they're not enough. They've still got the stain of last year's experience on their souls. She needs nine people who have yet to be touched by evil's bony fingers.

She continues her search, and she stumbles across a boy with dark eyes and a captivating smile. She tries to access his name, but in a fit of unexpected strength, Joey's brain blocks her attempt. _Not him,_ it seems to say. _He's off-limits._

The Sorceress is not used to being defied, so she tries again. And again. Two hours go by before she finally gives up and leaves the boy untouched.

And then, at last, she finds fresh meat.

_Tana. Tyler. Andrea. DeStorm. Lauren. Alex. Gabbie. Liza. Jesse._

__

__

The images accompanying _these_ names are nothing but positive. A boy with blonde hair geeking out over his favorite band...a small, brown-skinned girl making strange faces at the camera...another girl attempting to balance her stuffed animals on her bemused boyfriend's shoulder...

So bright. So innocent. So happy.

_That will change._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Another round of invitations are sent out...only this time, not everyone is willing to come. And who can blame them?


	2. An Invitation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Invitations are delivered, and we get to see several guests in their natural habitats. There's even a callback to What Happened Last Year.

_My friends,_

_I've been away for_ far _too long._

 

"Your presence is most urgently requested." The weird chick on DeStorm's doorstep hands him a white envelope, then promptly disappears.

"Ay!" he shouts after her. "Where'd you go?" He shakes his head, wondering what the hell is up with this neighborhood. "Looking like a medieval Girl Scout…"

 

_I want to invite you to a masquerade ball at an estate like no other. I'll explain everything after you arrive._

__

__

 

Gabbie rolls her eyes at her invitation. Trust Joey to make everything so goddamn overdramatic.

 

_To attend, you must assume a persona reminiscent of the Victorian era, and be dressed accordingly, or the carriage, which can bring you across time, will remain invisible to your eyes._

 

This has been a weird year for Jesse, so time travel doesn't seem as far-fetched to him as it would to anyone else. He shrugs off his confusion, pushes his reading glasses into place, and turns his attention back to his invitation.

 

_A package will accompany your invitation with the proper attire, which may contain a useful object._

 

"What's this?" Liza mutters to herself, examining the spoon-shaped object from her package. _Don't tell me: there's no silverware at Joey's place, and this is all I'll have to eat with. Whatever. Still gonna come, though._

 

_There will be people and creatures unique to the estate that know their place, whom you will interact with._

 

Tana, who's reading her invitation while wearing nothing but her bra and short shorts, is already fascinated by Joey's tale of fancy estates and Victorian glamour. She wouldn't miss this party for the world.

 

_You, however, will have no knowledge of what is to come. You will be a newborn babe in this exciting (and sometimes frightening) place._

 

"No, no, no!"

 _Another_ one? Has Joey Graceffa lost his goddamn _mind?_

Oli rips his invitation to pieces, scattering its remains all over his bedroom floor. "I am _not_ going to _another_ party by Joey!"

Once he's finished demolishing the envelope, he turns his attention to its accompanying package. He grabs it, opens the nearest window, and hurls it into the street, where it promptly gets run over by a passing minibus.

"Last time, eight people died!" His friends got poisoned, electrocuted, buried alive...pretty much every horrible thing that can happen to someone happened that night. Oli himself almost died twice. Sure, he survived, but he _still_ can't close his eyes without a rush of awful memories.

He _won’t_ go through another night like that one.

"Worst house party ever."

 

"Not today, Satan," Eva snarls as she lights her invitation on fire. She's never going back. She'd rather die.

 

The night of the party arrives, and carriages come to pick up Joey's eleven friends and take them to the Victorian era. Two stay home. The other nine dress their best, enter the carriages, and leave 2017 behind.

None of them know that tonight could be the last night of their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The guests arrive, and their outfits are to _die_ for.


	3. The Guests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guests arrive. That's it. That's all that happens. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, this entire chapter is going to be nothing but descriptions of the guests, their roles, and their outfits. If you have no interest in what the characters are wearing or who they are pretending to be, feel free to skip ahead to the next chapter, which is honestly a lot more interesting.

First through the door is Alex Wassabi, the Novelist. He's looking casually fancy in his white shirt, red-and-black patterned vest, black jacket, and matching pants. There's a red kerchief tied around his neck for a bit of extra color.

Liza Koshy, the Explorer, arrives soon afterward with a mischievous grin on her face. The little brown girl wears boyish white—white blouse, white pants, white button-down jacket with white frilly cuffs, even a white kerchief similar to Alex's. Her black hair is tied in a bun behind her head, and she looks ready to get her party game on.

Also ready to enjoy himself is Tyler Oakley, the Thespian, who's the next one to show up. His silk coat is an eye-popping shade of red, and it goes nicely with the rest of his ultra-fancy black-silver-white ensemble. In fact, pretty much the only plain thing about him is the pair of round eyeglasses on his face, and even those glasses have a golden shine to them.

Then comes Lauren Riihimaki, the Engineer. She's wearing a voluptuous yellow ball gown that drags behind her as she walks, along with a golden necklace and white high heels. Her hair, like Liza's, is styled into a bun, but a few blonde strands dangle down the sides of her head.

Ten minutes later, Jesse Wellens storms in, his silver revolver flashing underneath the bright lights of the house. The Outlaw sports a pitch-black coat, black pants, a weathered brown shirt, and an old grey scarf. His outfit is as different from Tyler's as it is possible to be, and yet, it still fits the atmosphere.

Next to join the party is Tana Mongeau, the Saloon Girl. Her pastel dress matches perfectly with her platinum blonde hair, and the white gloves and white lacy boots are a nice touch. She looks like a heroine from a Western, except, of course, for the fact that her outfit shows off a lot more cleavage than any Western damsel would dare to reveal.

Andrea Russett practically floats into the house, her role as the Mystic on display for all to see. She's letting her dark hair hang loose, showing off its purple highlights, and her pale green getup is reminiscent of a mythological priestess. The sash...the skirt...the blouse that's short enough to show her belly button...even her necklace and earrings add a supernatural vibe to her.

The guest who arrives next, DeStorm Power, struts into the house as if he's the king of all he sees. He's the Railroad Tycoon, and as such, he's kept it simple: a white shirt, a pale grey coat, a vest that's the same color as said coat, black overalls, and a tie. What _really_ makes him stand out from the others is the top hat nestled securely on his head.

Last but not least comes Gabbie Hanna, the Vaudevillian. The dress she wears is a silver spectacle of patterns and sequins, but the _true_ attention-getter is her headpiece. It's gold, and it sports a gigantic mess of feathers that not only match the purplish-bluish color of her hair, but also cover the top of her head completely.

Joey Graceffa, the Savant as well as the host, has yet to make an appearance at his own party. The guests are a bit worried, especially considering that they haven't seen him in ages, but they shrug it off and spend the next several minutes enjoying each other's company.

After all, it's _just_ a party.

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Party time! Party time! Everybody's feeling fine cause it's party time! Also, Alex can't resist Lauren's curves, Gabbie fails at toasting, Liza explores stuff, and Tyler indulges his inner fancypants.


	4. Welcome to the Reaper's Lair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party commences, but nothing is as it seems in the Victorian era.

Alex isn't the kind of guy who goes to masquerade balls on a regular basis. In fact, this is the first one he's ever attended. Is he _ready?_ What if he trips over his own feet and make a fool of himself in front of everyone?

 _Chill, Alex,_ he tells himself, shoving his nervous hands into the pockets of his jacket. _Relax. Smile. If you're not smiling, you're doing it wrong, remember?_

And then, he sees Lauren, and he forgets how to breathe.

She sent him on ahead, insisting that she wanted her outfit to be "a surprise" and that "it's _fine,_ Alex, we have two separate carriages, go on, I'll catch up." Now, she's here, and she looks _stunning_ in her sunshine-colored dress, and a thousand thoughts stampede their way through Alex's head like a herd of slightly horny buffalo.

_Wow. Is that...is she really..._

A happy sigh escapes his lips, and he reminds himself how lucky he is to be dating a girl like Lauren Riihimaki. He can already see another ball with her in the near future.

 

As she listens to her friends' lively chatter and watches Gabbie dance around in her heels, Tana bites her lip to keep from screaming. This is it. She's here. She's in the Victorian era, and she's never been more excited in her life.

"Where's Joey?" asks a clearly impatient Liza, crossing her arms as she talks.

"Well, it's his house," Andrea reminds her. "He's probably just here somewhere."

Alex shrugs. "He's been missing for a few days..."

"Oh, shit."

Tana's barely paying attention to the conversation; she's too busy squealing _omigod_ repeatedly in her mind. A big, fancy party...in a beautiful house...where she gets to dress up with all her friends...

If this is a dream, she never wants to wake up.

 

Fifteen minutes into the party, Joey _still_ hasn't shown up, and Andrea's beginning to get antsy. Where _is_ he? What the hell is taking him so long? _Especially_ after he's spent the past several days giving everyone a heart attack?

Someone's coming. She smiles, straightens up, and tries her best to get her outfit in order. It's Joey. It has to be.

It's not.

Instead, the guests are greeted by a white-haired gentleman with a red gemstone hanging around his neck. "Welcome to my home," he says with a smile, surveying the cheering crowd of YouTubers before him. "My name is Dorian. You all look so... _delicious."_

The others respond with a chorus of gratitude, and Andrea plays along, trying her best to ignore the twinge of suspicion in her soul. She knows that Joey likes theatrics, but...something about Dorian is giving her a lot of bad energy. Maybe it's the dangerously hungry look in his green eyes.

"Excuse me!" Liza pipes up. "Where's Joey?"

"He wanted me to greet you on his behalf, as he should be making his entrance shortly," Dorian explains.

Andrea squirms. _Come_ on, _Joey, get in here, don't tease us, just come and join the party so that I don't have to stare at this guy's serial killer face anymore..._

__

__

 

Gabbie's excited, not gonna lie, but she's also kinda nervous, because she doesn't know much about the Victorian era. What's it like? How are you supposed to act? And should she have dyed her hair back to its normal brown before she came?

Whatever. Too late now. She's here, multicolored hair and all, and she's listening to some old dude who _clearly_ isn't Joey (unless Joey randomly aged seventy years for no reason) ramble on about how delicious they all look. Oh, and there's also a new girl with them. She's a brunette beauty dressed in a tantalizing shade of black, and Gabbie's almost _certain_ that she's not a YouTuber.

_Oh, Joey. Have you been making new friends without telling us?_

Old man Dorian turns his attention to the new girl and smirks. "I see you've met my daughter, Alison."

Alison smiles nervously at the rest of the group, and Gabbie flashes her best Vaudevillian grin in her direction. Sure, the girl's a stranger, but if she's a pal of Joey's, she can't be all that bad.

"Why don't you get our guests some drinks?" Dorian suggests.

 _Yes!_ As soon as Alison brings out the alcohol, Gabbie snatches up a glass and downs it in one go. Victorian era or no Victorian era, this is _her_ kind of party.

Immediately after she's finished her glass, Dorian proposes "a toast! To Joey Graceffa!" and Gabbie remembers that she has the worst luck in the world. She laughs, mentally scolds herself for being so impulsive, and clinks her empty glass against the others.

"To Joey," says an especially cheery Liza Koshy, "wherever he may be."

Gabbie pretends to drink from her glass, hoping that no one will notice. Of course, someone _does_ notice, and it's Jesse. "Gabbie! What happened?"

Before Gabbie can answer his question _(oh, hi, Jesse, I'm a walking disaster who can't even toast properly, how are you?),_ Dorian speaks again. "Now!" He chuckles. "Enjoy the decor, as I shall return for you when all is ready."

With that, he heads back up the stairs, and the guests split up to explore the house. "Omigosh," Lauren exclaims, her voice glazed with wonder. "This chandelier...you're beautiful! You're beautiful!"

She's right. It's pretty. But Gabbie didn't come here to stare at the decorations. She came here to _party,_ goddamn it, and that's what she's gonna do.

 

"So what are you?" Liza asks Andrea, ready to embrace the Victorian personas they were given. 

Andrea shrugs. "I'm a Mystic."

"What?" squeals Alex. "No way! What does that mean?"

"Um..." The Mystic bites her lip, which strikes Liza as a very un-Mysticlike thing to do. "I do a lot of potions...I talk to spirits..." Her hazel eyes dart around their surroundings. "There's a lot of spirits here tonight, actually."

"Wait." Alex turns his attention to Liza. "What do _you_ do?"

 _I'm glad you asked._ "I explore!"

"Explore what?"

"I explore anything and everything," is Liza's quick reply.

She's an Explorer. Not the Dora kind, but the bad mama-jama kind, the kind that discovers brand-new lands and boldly goes where no little brown girl has gone before. She'll take on any mountain. Any ocean. Any crevice. Any underneath the skirt. Any inside the pants. Doesn't matter. She's exploring it.

 _God,_ she loves this character.

"I would say..." Andrea's still in Mystic mode. "Just avoid...uh...dark doorways." She waves her hand around like a slightly confused soothsayer. "I'm seeing bad..."

Liza's eyes widen. "But I _love_ dark doorways."

Alex laughs. Andrea smiles. As for Liza, she wiggles her eyebrows at her friends, twisting her mouth into a stupid yet hilarious expression. This is fun! She's having fun! She should time travel more often!

 

Tyler's first impression of the mansion is _pure decadence._ And since he's always been one to appreciate class, he feels right at home.

"I just _love_ to be the center of attention," says Gabbie, a snooty yet affable tone to her voice.

"I mean..." Tyler takes in her outfit. Her flashy dress, her vibrant hair, her beautiful feathered headpiece...no doubt about it, she is serving _looks_ tonight. "I see that head to toe."

Her eyes twinkle like a pair of dark brown diamonds. "What do you do?"

"Well." He shrugs. "I'm a Thespian, of course."

"I'm a Vaudevillian! Are you single?"

He knows that this whole conversation is just an extravagant game of make-believe, but he still can't help but shift uncomfortably in his shoes. "I...am... _exploring_ that," he replies, coating his voice as best he can with _Gabbie I'm freakin' gay._

"Oh!" is all she has to say about it.

 

Somehow, DeStorm finds himself in a corner with Tana and Jesse, and the Saloon Girl is currently eyeing him up like he's her ticket to fame. "Tell me about your money," she murmurs, a confident undertone to her seductive voice. "And your assets."

"Railroads," he tells her. What else is there to say? Besides, the railroads ain't real.

Neither is Jesse's Outlaw schtick, but _damn,_ he _looks_ like an Outlaw. So when he pipes up with "How tight is your security on these railroads?" and stares right through DeStorm with his bad-boy gaze, the Railroad Tycoon can't help but feel a bit nervous. _He's sneaky,_ he tells himself. _I'm gonna have to watch him._

But he keeps his cool and fires back, "How big is your gang?"

"I'm just trying to survive," says Jesse defensively.

"I mean..." Tana's tone is dangerously innocent. "Aren't we all?"

Before DeStorm or Jesse can respond, she saunters off, tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder, smiling that sly little smirk of hers. DeStorm marks her down as another one to keep an eye on.

 

This place is _unbelievable._ Lauren feels like she's in a life-sized dollhouse, absorbing its crystalline splendor through her eyes. It's practically a DIY dream come true.

Speaking of dreams, _wow._ Her _dress._ She looks like a Disney princess in this thing.

Of course, Tana, being the queen of fashion that she is, is quick to pick up on the dress's amazingness. "How did you create _this?"_ she asks, gesturing to Lauren's summer-colored skirts.

"Oh..." Lauren takes the opportunity to show off the intricacies of her outfit. "Just a little something. I'm an Engineer, so I create things of all sorts and styles."

Liza chimes in with an incredulous "You made that booty?"

"I made this booty!"

 _"That's_ what Alex is writing about," says Liza mischievously.

Lauren giggles. "This is the muse." Speaking of Alex, that little red kerchief looks downright _hot_ on him. She's got a weird urge to bury her hands in its silk. "This is the muse." _Laurex, Victorian edition. I like the sound of that._

 

"Are your books on Audible.com?" Tyler wants to know, because he's Tyler and he can't resist a chance at that sweet, sweet sponsor money.

Alex shakes his head, trying not to groan at his friend's ridiculousness. "Not yet."

"Kindle?" asks DeStorm.

"No. They're not out yet."

"Library?"

"I haven't—"

Tyler gets it. "They're just up here right now," he says, pointing to his forehead.

"Yeah." Alex presses his fingers against his own temple, conjuring up the image of not-quite-written Great American Novels in his mind. "They're right here right now."

"It would be a shame if anything were to _happen_ to you tonight," is Tyler's cryptic response.

 _That's creepy, Ty,_ thinks Alex. _Stop being creepy._

 

Apparently, Liza the Explorer wants to go exploring, so Tana and Lauren are dragged off to look at a book. The three girls crowd around its gigantic leather pages, and Tana's intimidated by the sheer _size_ of the thing.

Lauren twists her mouth into a slightly bewildered expression. "Look." She pushes the silk bookmark aside to reveal a familiar portrait. "What's this?"

"That's him!" exclaims Liza. "That's Dorian!"

She's right. It's easy to recognize that stern, imposing face. Tana can't help but wonder why Joey's new friend has a book with a picture of himself lying out in the open. Maybe it's a Victorian thing?

But Liza has lost interest in Dorian's picture and is now examining the bookmark—or, more accurately, what's written on the bookmark. "It says either 'live' or 'evil,'" she reports.

Finally, after a few seconds of befuddled squinting, Tana understands. "This has to do with something. It wouldn't be open on this page if it didn't—"

"There's _no_ way," Lauren scoffs.

Tana ignores her. "And this guy!" She points at Dorian's portrait. "We _just_ met this guy. He's _here."_

"Do you think he was just reading about himself before he came down here?" Liza wants to know.

They don't get it. Dorian's up to something. Him and Joey are probably in cahoots, messing with them, and none of this makes sense, but it's the _only_ possible explanation. Clearly, all is not right with Tana's dreamworld.

 

 _"That's_ a daddy if I've ever seen one," says Tyler between giggles, gesturing to the painting on the wall. A few moments later, DeStorm realizes what's up.

_Dorian._

"That's not a painting."

"This is the guy!" Alex's voice is a high-pitched squeak, and DeStorm's ears are already starting to bleed. "This is Dorian!"

Something's off about the painting. DeStorm can tell from where he's standing—there's more to this stupid thing than meets the eye. "Hold up," he tells the other two. "We gotta check this."

Alex stares at it for maybe half a second before he goes "Whoa!" and peels away one of its corners.

"What?" exclaims Tyler. "How did you just do that?"

DeStorm doesn't have the energy to wonder about Alex's eagle eyes. He's too busy wondering why the _hell_ this goddamn freakin' _painting_ has a _peel-away corner._ What kind of a house does Joey _have_ here?

To makes things even weirder, Alex takes the corner off completely, and it's a goddamn _map._ "I found part of a map!" he squeals, as if he just found the elixir of life or something.

 _This kid is annoying,_ thinks DeStorm. _I hope he leaves me alone once we're done here._

 

Jesse is confused. Why did Joey leave this weird cylinder thing lying around? It's clearly some sort of puzzle, but is it just a party trick, or is it a clue to their host's current location? Has this party suddenly turned into a game of "find the Joey?"

"We found part of a map," DeStorm announces from across the room.

_Okay. "Find the Joey" it is._

"We found something too!" shouts Gabbie, holding up the cylinder. "It's a puzzle!"

She hands it to Jesse. Everyone gathers around him, and the Outlaw can feel the weight of their expectations on his shoulders. _Okay._ He squints at the cylinder. _I got this. It's just a stupid puzzle. Everything's under control._

Apparently, in order to unlock this puzzle, they need to insert a password. "Try 'Dorian,'" suggests Andrea. "That's that guy's name."

"No." Jesse shakes his head. "There's only four letters." He tries J-O-E-Y, but nothing happens. "It's not 'Joey.'" _Of course. That would be too easy._ "It's definitely not 'Joey.'"

"What's his daughter's name?" Andrea suggests.

It's Alison, and that's not it, because _four letters, Andrea._ But before Jesse can tell her that, Alex snatches the cylinder away from him. "I got this." The spark of inquisitive confidence in his eyes is enough for Jesse to give up and let him have it. "I'm the puzzle master."

"Really?" Gabbie gasps.

"Yeah." He's working that puzzle like a scientist about to have a breakthrough. "I'm a Sudoku master. I'm the _best."_

Gabbie watches him work, biting her lip so hard that Jesse's half-convinced she's gonna bite it clean off. "I don't think that's it."

"I feel like we should ask—"

Tyler never finishes his sentence, because Alex shouts "Got it!" and shows off the now-broken cylinder. Jesse resists the urge to facepalm.

"You got it?" Tyler asks.

"No," says Jesse, shaking his head, the phrase _I'm too old for this shit_ floating through his brain despite the fact that he is thirty-four. "I think you broke it."

 

This is _super_ cryptic. Cryptic AF. And cryptic isn't really Lauren's thing, so she and the others decide to bring the book downstairs and show the evidence to the group. After all, nine heads are better than three.

"Okay," she says once they've gone downstairs and successfully captured everyone's attention. "So this bookmark says 'evil' on one side and 'live' on the other..."

"That sounds like an Eminem lyric," is Gabbie's insightful contribution.

All of a sudden, Tyler shouts "Evil!" and everyone bursts into cheers. It takes a moment for Lauren to realize what's happening, but then she sees Alex and Jesse playing with some kind of password puzzle, and _oh! Wow! Of course! I should've known!_

Alex bursts into his trademark goofy grin. "That's what it is! It _has_ to be 'evil!'"

"Or 'live,'" Lauren reminds him. "Try 'live' or 'evil.'"

Jesse puts "evil" into the combination. Sure enough, the cylinder slides open, and Lauren breathes a sigh of relief.

"Is it the other half of the map?" asks Tyler.

It isn't. Instead, a key falls into Jesse's hand, and everyone starts to shout "A key! A key!" Lauren wrinkles her nose, wondering what on earth they need a key for. Is this another one of Joey's silly games?

Speaking of Joey, he _still_ hasn't shown up...

 

Tyler isn't too worried. He's known Joey for a long time, and _girl, this isn't even the weirdest thing you've ever done._ "So we need to find something that's locked."

He feels a tug on his shoulder.

It's Alison. She pulls him and Alex into a nearby hallway, and Tyler's shady alarm is going off at full blast. Who _is_ this girl? What does she want with them?

Her eyes are danger signs. "You need to leave."

"We need to _leave?"_

"Get all your friends and go," she insists. "It's not safe here."

"What do you mean, it's not safe?" asks Alex.

Tyler frowns. _Omigod._ "Is there somebody here?" _Girl, I'm not here for this! I don't trust you! But also, I feel like I_ need _to trust you..._

Before Alison can elaborate on whatever danger they're facing, some random guy shows up. "Your father is ready for you in the ballroom," he tells Alison, and she nods, grim resignation outlining her features.

Tyler and Alex rejoin their friends. "You guys, we should go," says Alex, who's clearly taken Alison's warning seriously. "We should just...let's just go...something's not right about this..."

"Something's wrong," Tyler echoes. He wasn't worried before, but _he is now._

 

"If you could just follow me," Alison instructs the group.

Liza doesn't get it. Why are Tyler and Alex acting so weird all of a sudden? Nothing's wrong here. They're having fun, right? Look at all the fun they're having! If only Joey—

A rough hand clamps over her mouth.

_Oh, shit._

She struggles with all her might, but the dude's grip is too strong for her, and she's yanked through the doorway despite her panicked attempts at escape. _No no no no what is happening why me why—_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Things quickly take a turn for what-the-heck-is-going-on. Also, Tana tries to be a hero, and Jesse invokes the Black Guy Dies First trope right to DeStorm's face.


	5. Cue the Main Course

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liza's been kidnapped, Joey's still missing, and everyone's about to have a bad time.

It happens so fast. Before anyone can come to terms with what is going on, the door slams, and Liza Koshy has disappeared.

Andrea's heart sinks.

"We can't leave Liza!" Tana wails.

Alex shakes his head, following Alison out of the room with a worried expression on his face. "She's gone." His voice is tainted with frantic regret. "She's gone."

"We're _really_ bad friends!" complains Gabbie as they leave. "We are _not_ good friends!"

 _Ugh._ Andrea knew it, she knew it all along, she _knew_ that something was off about this house, and now Liza's been dragged away to God-knows-where. What awful things are they going to _do_ to her?

 _And once they're done...what are they planning on doing to_ us?

Tyler has somehow become the voice of reason. "Alison was right. She told us that we have to get out of here. No matter what happens, we have to stick together."

Together. Yes. Despite losing Liza, they're still a pretty large group, so maybe they can overwhelm the enemy with sheer numbers. Even if they can't...well, Jesse has a gun, and DeStorm's fairly strong, and even Alex looks like he can hold his own in a fight. They still have a chance.

She hopes.

 

"Is _nobody_ concerned about Liza?" Gabbie frets as the remaining YouTubers make their way outside. "She _literally_ just got taken by a really hot dude!"

Tana squirms. There's still a part of her that wants to believe in her beautiful, perfect party where nothing goes wrong, so she tries to put Liza's kidnapping out of her mind. Maybe it's just a stunt of some sort. Maybe...

Apparently, Tyler feels the same way. "This is _Joey_ we're talking about...it could just be theatrics..."

"All I know is, we need to get Joey and Liza and get out of here!" Alex exclaims.

"Listen!" Alison silences the group with a single shout. "My father's lying to you, okay? He's not the owner of this estate." Her blue eyes dart like bullets around them. "You need to stay close to me tonight, okay?"

As if on cue, a door opens up, and a burly man snarls, "Bring in the guests."

Chills run up Tana's spine. Something's wrong something's wrong _something's wrong,_ but she plays it off, smiling a nervous little grin. "I mean..." _Deep breaths._ "Joey invited us to have a good time..." _Don't worry. Be happy. It's gonna be okay._

 _"You're_ probably dying first," says Jesse to DeStorm.

"I _know!"_ DeStorm, the only black guy in the group, rolls his eyes. "Goddamn."

One by one, they enter the ballroom, and Tana's still trying to convince herself that this is a perfectly normal masquerade ball. "It's time to get lit! It's time to get lit!" She waves her arms around like a drunk partygoer, ignoring Liza's disappearance, ignoring Joey's shadiness, ignoring everything that's happened so far. This is a party. She's here to have fun. Things can't be _all_ that bad.

 

Tyler's still freaked out, and Alison's constant warnings are _not_ helping. So he practically has to force himself into the ballroom, his heart thumping frantic patterns against his throat.

It's a nice ballroom. Under normal circumstances, he'd probably still be ooohing and aaahing at the marvelous decor. But right now, he's more concerned with the room's occupants—masked men and women, dressed their best, dancing, talking, laughing, and staring at the group like they're overdressed pieces of meat.

"I like your mask," Gabbie giggles at one of the men, and he responds by licking his lips at her.

"Shh." Alex's voice trembles, but he's clearly still trying to keep his cool. "Stay with Alison."

Tyler quickly glances around the room, trying to spot his missing friends, but Joey and Liza are nowhere to be seen. There is, however, a giant curtain draped over the wall, and Tyler hopes to God that the two of them are hiding behind it, ready to surprise everyone.

A dark-haired woman in a greyish-green dress approaches them. "I'm first, Alison."

"Back off!" snaps the same man who escorted them in. "I already laid claim."

 _Laid claim?_ What is _that_ supposed to mean? And why is the man eyeing Tyler as he says it? _I mean, I'm sorry, sweetheart, but you're not really my type...oh, God, where's Joey, where's Liza, where_ are _they?_

"Okay," he squeaks. "Things are a little wacky..."

"They're talking about claiming people," says Andrea nervously.

Lauren grabs Alex's arm, and he pulls her close to him, a protective fire mixing with the worry in his eyes. Tana, meanwhile, is twirling around like a top, and Gabbie's got a scared-yet-confident smile on her face.

And then there's Jesse. Jesse, who's gotten distracted by two lingerie-clad women feeling each other up on a nearby couch. "I want to join _that_ party!" he complains as Alison pulls him away.

Tyler barely has time to be exasperated by Jesse's libido before a portly woman closes the doors behind them.

_We're trapped._

"Um..." The strangers have stopped what they're doing to stare at the YouTubers, and Tyler doesn't like it. Not at all. "You guys?"

"Ladies and gentlemen," Dorian announces from the front of the room, "dinner has arrived!"

As Alison shields the group, Tyler is confused. _Dinner? I don't see any..._

_Oh._

_Oh, no._

"They are vampires."

"We are _dinner!"_

_They're going to eat us alive._

 

The lights go out, the masks come off, and Gabbie screams for her life.

So, to be fair, does everyone else. They're shouting, sobbing, squirming, pushing, trying their best to save themselves (or, in Alex's case, save a hysterical Lauren) from the twenty-plus vampires bearing down on them. The vampires themselves spit and snarl, hunger illuminating their coarse features, desperate for an opening to claim their prey.

Gabbie closes her eyes, cursing herself for coming to this awful goddamn party. It all makes sense. Dorian called them delicious...Alison warned them that something was up...all those puzzles...and now, there are vampires trying to eat them. This is _not_ what Gabbie signed up for.

"But first," Dorian continues, a shit-eating grin on his face, "the appetizer!" He pulls back the curtain, and _omigod guys we found him._

"That's _Joey!"_ shouts Tyler.

So it is. He's chained to a post, staring listlessly at the ground, dressed in an all-beige outfit that matches his brown hair. He looks like he's on the borderline between life and death.

"Joey!" Gabbie screams his name until she's hoarse, tears stinging the corners of her eyes. He's hurt. She can tell. They've probably started eating him already, or they've infected him, or something. She doesn't know. Point is, they've _got_ him. It's too late to save him now.

And Liza...poor girl...she's already dead. She _has_ to be. She's so tiny...it wouldn't take long for a vampire to drain her of her blood. At least she's in a better place...at least...

_I don't wanna die!_

Dorian turns on a strange apparatus that's hooked to Joey's arm, and he uses it to pour himself a cup of blood. Gabbie feels like she's about to throw up all over the ballroom floor.

"Alison, darling," their monstrous host says with a smile, "do you care for a drink? You seem a bit pent up!"

"I'm not thirsty," Alison replies, a dangerous smile on her face.

Dorian rolls his eyes. "You disappoint me. Bring in the other warm one!"

_The other...Liza?_

"Liza!"

Gabbie was wrong. Liza Koshy is still alive, and as she's dragged into the ballroom, there's an expression of pure terror on her face. "Guys!" she screams. "Why am I here? Why are we _all_ here?!?"

 

Liza isn't having fun anymore.

Her vampire captor—because oh, yeah, vampires _exist_ apparently, you learn something new every day—chains her to an empty post, and her entire body is shaking with ice-cold fear. _I'm going to die,_ she realizes. _I'm about to get killed in front of all these people I just met._

 _I didn't even get a chance to_ party _yet!_

"No!" Tana runs towards her, screaming her name, and Liza's heart sinks into her rib cage. _Tana, don't, please, stay away, I don't want to watch anyone else die tonight. Especially not if it's because of me._

Joey's on the other post, his blue eyes empty, his skin a disturbing shade of white.

Tana's still screaming. "No! Liza!"

Liza closes her eyes, trying to ignore the tears that threaten to stream down her face. Memories of those she's leaving behind—her family, her friends, David, even her characters for some reason—flood her soul, and she clings to them like a drowning rat clinging to a life preserver. Maybe, if she tries hard enough, she can at _least_ die happy...

 

 _At least we'll all die together,_ thinks Lauren as she clings to Alex's arm. Somehow, the thought of dying alongside nine of her closest friends isn't _nearly_ as scary as the thought of dying alone.

The vampire in the greyish-green dress sneers, "I'm _done_ waiting, Alison!" She shoots a nauseating grin at the group (and Andrea in particular).

And then, just as Lauren and the others resign themselves to their fate, a miracle happens.

"Back _off,_ Vera!"

Alison headbutts the female vampire (Vera, apparently), sending her toppling to the ground in a rush of silk, and then she punches her in the mouth for good measure. Once Vera is taken care of, Alison casts what appears to be a bolt of yellow-hot energy, sending all the vampires cowering in various corners.

Before Lauren has time to process what's happening, Tyler shouts "This way!" and runs for the door.

The others follow him. It's hard for Lauren to run in her gown, but she holds up its edges to prevent any unnecessary tripping. To her surprise, she makes it to the hallway in one piece.

 _Thank God._ They flee upstairs. Her heart is pounding harder than it's ever pounded in her life. _We survived. They didn't get us. We're all still alive._

_But...Joey and Liza...oh God...we left them back there..._

"Alison!" Dorian's angry shout echoes through the house. _"Alison!"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The importance of salt. Also, Andrea has a minor freakout, while Tyler's pretty sure that they're all screwed without Alex.


	6. Blood, Salt, and Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group must get over their collective panic and band together to defeat the vampires.

On the one hand, they should get out of here, because _freakin' goddamn vampires Jesus what the hell._

On the other hand, Gabbie isn't too keen on leaving Joey and Liza here, because, again, _freakin' goddamn vampires Jesus what the hell,_ and friends don't let friends get eaten alive.

"It's about to get _real,_ yo," exclaims DeStorm as the group runs to the second floor.

After they frantically wander around for a bit, everyone ducks into an upstairs room. "All right." Jesse, being the savvy Outlaw that he is, surveys the place with a steely eye. "No vampires in _here,_ right?"

Gabbie takes command. "Listen. Guys. We have to figure out— _where's_ Joey, _where's_ Liza, _are_ they okay?"

"This is _my_ kind of party!"

_Jesse! Not helping!_

"We should get out of here and then call for help," says Andrea matter-of-factly. "Why would we stay here?"

DeStorm snorts. "So you can just Uber home? We can't _leave!"_

Okay. Gabbie can already tell that DeStorm's going to be a _great_ asset to the team. Tough. No-nonsense. Sarcastic. Her kind of person.

But she doesn't have much time to think about that before Alison grabs everyone's attention. "If you want to save Joey," she tells them, her voice low and fierce, "we have to take down my father."

So now they're vampire hunters. Gabbie shrugs. She can deal with that. Just as long as she doesn't have to actually _kill_ anyone, she doesn't care what else she has to do. Joey and Liza need their help. They _can't_ let them down.

_Unless they're dead already._

_Shut up, me._

 

"Why would you betray your father?" Tyler wants to know.

"There are other people who want out," is Alison's cryptic response. "I'm doing this for them."

Tana wrinkles her nose. Her head hurts from the terrifying mayhem of the past fifteen minutes, but she's still clear-headed enough to realize that something doesn't add up. Who _is_ Alison? _Why_ is she being so nice to them, especially after her father just tried to have them all killed?

_She's a vampire, too..._

"Now, a stake to the heart is _not_ going to be enough to kill a vampire as powerful as my father," Alison continues. "He has to be placed in a circle of purified salt, burned by a sunstone, and _then_ stabbed."

Tana's confused already.

Thankfully, so is Gabbie. "So we have to get ice?"

 _"Salt,"_ several people clarify at once.

Alison keeps talking. "My father used to keep purified salt in this room in case there's a rebel vampire."

"Of _course_ he did," Tyler snaps.

As Alison paces, Tana stares at her, suspicion furrowing her sweat-soaked brow. She doesn't trust her. She can't help but worry that she'll end up betraying them later. And yet...they have no choice. They _have_ to do as she says, or else Joey and Liza will be lost to them forever.

 

Jesse was being sarcastic. This is _not_ his kind of party.

Sure, there's adventure, hot chicks, all that jazz, but the parties _he_ goes to _never_ involve goddamn vampires after their blood. And since he'd rather not end up as someone's meal, he might as well listen to what this Alison girl has to say. Even if she _does_ seem a bit shady.

"I'll keep watch for you," says Alison. "If there's a vampire coming, you'll hear this bell." She picks up a bell and shakes it, making a high-pitched ringing noise that sounds vaguely unnerving.

"Oh, God," Tyler moans.

Alison acts like she didn't hear him. "If they come, you need to get out of sight. If they see you, they'll drag you away. Okay?"

 _Drag us away?_ No. Not happening. "Can we _kill_ the vampires?" Jesse asks, acutely aware of the gun against his leg. _Give me a chance._ A few shots from his revolver, and those vampires will be dead at his feet. Boom. Job done. No one has to die. Well, except for the vampires, but screw them.

Tyler shakes his head. "If we find the salt."

"But—"

Alison takes off, bell in hand, and no one's listening to Jesse anymore. "You gon' ring that bell, right?" DeStorm shouts after their guide's retreating figure. "You gon' ring the bell?"

Jesse rolls his eyes. _Chill out, DeStorm. She's gonna ring the goddamn bell. Good Lord._ His hand travels to his holster, feeling the smooth metal of his weapon. _It's up to me. Maybe this gun_ won't _work on vampires, but it's still my job to keep everybody safe._

His time will come.

 

Andrea still wants to leave, but...at the same time, there's _clearly_ a bigger story here, and now a part of her wants to stay and uncover the truth about this place. Clearly, she's letting her curiosity get the best of her.

Alison leaves the room, assuring a worried DeStorm that "I'll ring the bell! I promise!" As soon as she's gone, the world around them grows slightly more threatening, as if her presence was a barrier between them and a horde of malevolent spirits. Andrea almost shouts _come back, please, don't leave us,_ but she manages to swallow the words before they can surface.

Tyler, of all people, takes charge. "What are all the things that we have? The key..."

"We have a map," Andrea replies. "We have the key and half the map."

Tyler nods, clearly trying to be brave, but Andrea can detect a flicker of fear in his blue eyes. "We have to get out of here." He paces the room as he talks. "We can't stay. The vampires..."

_Don't worry, Tyler. We'll get out. Once we understand what we're up against, escape will prove a lot easier than you think._

 

DeStorm ain't scared. Not one bit. He's a goddamn _Tycoon,_ or at least he is in _this_ world, which makes him too powerful and too cool to be scared of anything. So what if he asked about the bell? He just wanted to make _sure._ You gotta be careful around here.

Careful. Not scared. Just _careful._

So right now, everyone's looking for the salt they're supposed to find, and no one seems to be having any luck. "Did anybody check in, like, the cushions?" Andrea asks, even though DeStorm _checked_ the damn cushions. Twice.

Gabbie, being the sassy girl that she is, shoots back with "Did anybody check in Tana's cleavage?"

Tana giggles and shows off her boobs.

Ignoring all this nonsense, DeStorm keeps searching for stuff, his ears on high alert for the sound of Alison's bell. (Again, he's _not_ scared. He's _not.)_ After a full three minutes, he _finally_ sees something—a scroll, about the size of his finger, sitting on the mantlepiece like it's supposed to be there. He snatches it up.

"Guys!" shouts Gabbie. "I found a scroll!"

Seconds after she says that, Tyler pipes up with "Wait! I found a scroll too!"

DeStorm smirks. Good. They're getting somewhere. "As did I," he announces, holding his scroll in the air like a warrior showing off the decapitated head of his enemy. "Found a scroll."

"Hold on a second," says Jesse. "What does it say? Is there a clue?"

It occurs to DeStorm that these scrolls might mean something, so he open his up and reads it. "Mine says 3-B."

They find more scrolls, and as it turns out, they _all_ have numbers on them, along with weird little shapes. None of this makes sense to DeStorm, but he decides to just roll with it.

"Okay, well, the shapes have to mean _something,"_ insists Alex. "There's two rectangles and one triangle."

"Three scrolls," Tyler remarks.

But DeStorm's too busy looking for more scrolls to pay attention to what they're saying. "All right, I found another one, y'all!" he crows, freeing their fourth scroll from the bottle it's hidden in. "I found another one. Of course I did." _I'm a billionaire. You can't be a billionaire without strategy. Or a high IQ._ "Because I'm the mother—"

Before he can finish his sentence, the bell rings.

 

"The bell!"

Mayhem breaks out. Everyone's scrambling for a hiding place: behind chairs, behind lamps, behind curtains, behind pretty much everything they can get their hands on. Some of them are even pushing each other out of the way to get to their preferred spots. Lauren ducks behind a curtain, her heart racing, every muscle in her body begging her to stay out of sight.

And then, just as an especially nasty-looking vampire enters the room, she remembers.

_My dress!_

The same yellow dress she was gushing about to Liza and Tana earlier is now proving to be more trouble than it's worth. It's so big and voluptuous that its train sticks out from behind the curtain, like a giant neon sign leading straight to her location.

 _Oh, no..._ She tries to yank it out of danger, but it's too late. She's been found.

The vampire snatches her up from her hiding place and drags her out of the room. She screams bloody murder, hoping against hope that someone (Alex, maybe?) will save her, but she's whisked away before anyone has the chance.

 _Oh, God._ Tears of panic moisten her cheeks. _Oh, God, is this it? Is this where they get me? Am I about to die?_

Next thing she knows, she's outside, and the vampire who took her is busy tying her to a pillar while a second vampire looks on. "Here!" her abductor snaps. "Found one! And, for the record, once we've got all of them and Dorian gives the go-ahead to start the feast, I claim _her."_

"Come _on,_ Demetrius," sighs the other one. "You _know_ that there's at least six of us who want a crack at her. Why don't you take the gunslinger? I don't think anyone's claimed _him_ yet..."

"Helena did. So did Christine. They're sharing him, I think. And besides, girls are more _fun!_ They scream, and they squirm, and they—"

Lauren stops listening.

Although things look grim for her, the Engineer's frightened soul still holds on to whatever traces of hope it can attach itself to. Alex will come. He'll find her. He'll save her. He'll get her out of here. Even if he doesn't, one or more of the others will _surely_ set her free before the vampires have a chance to end her life.

_This isn't the end. They'll come for me. I know in my heart they will. ___

____

____

 

As Lauren is kidnapped, Alex's mind frantically orders his body to move. _Save her, you idiot! Don't just stand there! You're her boyfriend! You can't just let them—_

Too late. She's gone.

Alex emerges from his hiding place, cursing himself for being such a coward. For a moment, he considers going after them, only to realize that he can't remember which way they went.

 _I failed her._ The realization cripples him, and he slumps, defeated, against the wall. _I'm a bad boyfriend. I let her get taken. This is all my fault. If she dies...oh, God...if she dies..._

But she's _not_ gonna die. She's _Lauren._ People like Lauren don't just _die._ He'll see her again. He's sure of it.

Tyler's voice brings him back to reality. "Okay. So what do we have?"

"We have seven scrolls," says Alex, pointing at the small army of scrolls on the table. He doesn't remember how they found the other three; he can only assume that it happened after Lauren was taken.

"Should we put them in order?" asks Andrea.

"Half a map," Alex continues, ignoring her question, "and that's it. And the key, but..."

"So what does all of this mean?" DeStorm wonders aloud, curling his lips into an expression of annoyed bewilderment.

Alex doesn't know. But there's no use worrying about it now. If they're going to find the salt, kill the king, and save their friends, they _have_ to focus on the task at hand. The answers will come later. Hopefully.

"Oh!" The light of a nearby candelabra illuminates _another_ tiny paper clue. He grabs it. "I found another scroll!"

_Hold on, Lauren. I'm coming._

 

If Tyler had to pick the smartest guest here, he would pick Alex. No question about it. The Novelist is looking _everywhere,_ thinking about _everything,_ examining _every single_ possibility...he's like a supercomputer trapped inside the body of a twenty-seven-year-old man.

They _need_ Alex. He's somebody that they're not gonna survive this without.

Case in point: he is currently crawling around _under_ the pool table, looking for clues. "Why?" sighs Jesse, shaking his head, but Alex is too busy investigating to pay any attention to him.

Sure enough, his efforts pay off. "Oh! Here's a box!"

Alex emerges from under the table, a billiard box in his right hand, and Tyler's heart dances an overexcited jig within his chest. _Yes!_ it cheers as it beats. _We found a thing! Thank God!_

"You have a key?" Alex asks.

Jesse tries the key they found earlier, and it works. "Yo."

The box opens up to reveal a bunch of pool balls, neatly compacted together, each with a different number on its side. There's also a diagram and a note. "Listen!" shouts Alex, grabbing both pieces of paper. "Listen!"

_Recreate the king's last game of pool using these nine numbered balls. Leave the others in the pocket. Use a cue to line them up perfectly. The room holds the combination._

"I don't know what any of that means!" Gabbie complains.

"I do!" insists Jesse. "I know. I understand."

Well, Tyler's glad that _someone_ knows. He's never been into pool all that much, unless it's the kind of pool that you can swim in, so he's a bit lost on the specifics of their task. At least they have a diagram (plus the combined wisdom of Alex and Jesse) to guide them.

"Okay...so..." Alex examines the diagram with the precision of a scientist examining a microscope. "1-C. So...rectangle...and it goes here, so...this is one..."

Jesse mutters "okay" before a flash of realization darts across his dark eyes. "Wait, wait, wait! Hold on! There's one missing."

Tyler blinks. He's right. "We're missing one scroll." _Dammit._ "Wait. We _all_ need to look for the last scroll." It's somewhere in this room. He knows it. They're so close. They just have to look a _little_ bit harder.

Everyone spends a good two minutes looking for the scroll. Everyone, that is, except for Alex and Jesse, who are still trying to figure out the cue thing. Alex is muttering to himself about how "this is gone" and "14-B," none of which make _any_ sense to Tyler.

"There _has_ to be another," Tyler murmurs, beads of sweat sliding down his forehead. It's here. Somewhere. Right?

Thank God for Gabbie Hanna. The girl with the multicolored hair comes through like a beacon of hope for the group, shouting "Found it!" with all the confidence of a performer about to take the stage. The ninth and last scroll lies between her fingertips.

"Good job," says Tyler.

 

Slowly but surely, the group puts the pieces of the pool puzzle together.

Alex runs the show, calling out combinations, telling people where to put their balls, and Andrea can sense an almost manic energy from him. She might not actually _be_ a Mystic, but she _is_ pretty good at reading people, and everything about Alex right now screams _gotta get this done, gotta solve the puzzle, gotta go save Lauren._

To be honest, Lauren Riihimaki is probably dead already, but Andrea doesn't have the heart to admit it aloud. Not while hope still dances in Alex's eyes.

On the bright side, they're almost done. "Three?" Alex calls.

"Last one!" announces DeStorm, holding up his ball. "Last one. I have it. It's...uh...triangle B." He sounds awfully proud of himself.

"This goes right there." Alex points to an empty spot on the pool table. He spouts off a bunch of numbers and letters that sound like pure gibberish to Andrea, and he finishes it off with "Right there. In the corner. And something's gonna happen."

"Brace yourself," groans Tyler.

"Oh, God." Andrea isn't ready for whatever's about to pop out at them, but she tries to be brave anyway.

Tyler has the last ball. "Are we doing it?" he asks, his face the picture of anxious apprehension.

Alex nods at him. "Put it down."

Tyler obeys.

Almost immediately, a nearby box flies open. "Oh!" Alex shouts. "The box opened!"

"Omigod, you guys." Tyler's talking a mile a minute, but at least the fear is fading from his face. "The box opened."

"Oh, shit," is all that Andrea has to say.

Gabbie is the first to investigate the now-open box. "It's another key!" she reports.

Andrea frowns. "Wait. What does it open?"

"Try that," suggests DeStorm, pointing to the pool cabinet. "Try right there."

Gabbie takes DeStorm's advice and uses the key to open the pool cabinet. After a brief investigation, she finds something. "Salt jar." She holds it up for the others to see. "It's empty, though. At least we have pool cues."

"We need _salt!"_ Tana complains. "Not _pool cues!"_

"What did she say we needed to do?" asks Jesse. "A stake?"

"A circle of salt," half the group replies at once.

Jesse grins. "And _then_ we stab them."

"Wait, are we _stabbing_ someone?" Gabbie's face twists itself into an expression of horrified bewilderment. "I'm not down."

Andrea shakes her head. "No! We can't stab—"

"I am _so_ down!" Tana chirps.

Before Andrea has the chance to wonder why Jesse and Tana are so violent-minded all of a sudden, the bell rings. Everyone panics (Tyler, especially, screams like a three-year-old girl) and ducks back into hiding.

Everyone, that is, except Andrea. The bell catches her off guard, so she wastes several precious seconds processing what's going on.

"All right, you little _shits!"_

_Vampire. Here. Must hide...don't let her find me..._

But there's no time to hide now. Vera the vampire marches into the room, shouting "Where are you?" into the silent air, and her eyes meet Andrea's almost instantly. _"Oh!"_

"Oh, God." 

Andrea tries to run, but Vera's hot on her trail. "You smell nice! Come with me." Her voice is a menacing purr. "Come with _me,_ sweetie..."

"You guys!" In a last-ditch effort to stay alive, Andrea appeals to her hidden friends, hoping against hope that one of them will come out and rescue her. "Help me! You guys! _Help!"_

Vera grabs her by the arm and hauls her away, laughing all the while. "Watch that dress," she snarls, "or it'll make it more painful."

"You guys!" screams Andrea. "You're just gonna let her take me?"

They do, in fact, let Andrea get taken, much to her dismay. _It's over,_ she realizes as she's dragged into the courtyard. _I'm dead. I'm going to die._

"You're _mine,"_ Vera hisses into her ear. "I claimed you from the start. I have a knack for quality, my mother always said, and..." She lets out a psychotically happy sigh. "I'll take it nice and slow, sweetheart. We are going to have _such_ fun together."

A slow, painful death at the hands of a maniacal vampire woman is _not_ Andrea's idea of fun, but she's not about to tell that to her captor. Instead, she closes her eyes and braces herself for Vera's fangs, fighting to keep a stoically brave expression on her face.

"Oh, no need to tense up like that, darling! I can't enjoy you yet. Apparently it wouldn't be _fair_ to the rest of my clan. We have to find _all_ your little friends before I get a taste of you, so why don't you just wait here with sunshine skirts?"

 _Sunshine skirts?_ Andrea opens her eyes, and her heart soars once she sees who Vera is referring to.

"Lauren!" The blonde is tied to a pillar, terrified but otherwise okay. "Lauren! Oh, thank God! You're still alive!"

"Andrea!"

"An-dree-ahh," hums Vera as she ties her prisoner to the pillar right next to Lauren's. Once she's done, she steps back to admire her handiwork, than whispers "I'll come for you" and disappears.

Lauren immediately starts asking questions. "The others...are they okay?"

"They're fine," Andrea murmurs, glad to be alive.

 

Jesse really, _really_ wants to shoot something right now.

Two of his friends have been taken away by hungry vampires, and he knows exactly who to blame: himself. He should've protected them. He should've charged out from his hiding place, said a cool one-liner, and blown those crazy bloodsuckers away. Instead, he let fear get the best of him, and now they're gone. Maybe they're dead. And it's all his fault for not saving them.

 _Next time,_ he tells himself. _Next time, I'll take them down._

"Okay, so we need salt!" Gabbie shouts. "Is it at the bar?"

Alex checks under the cushions, and his shoulders slump into a typical things-aren't-going-well position. "No salt over here. We looked everywhere." He and DeStorm turn their attention to the now-open pool cabinet. "Check the cues."

"Maybe we have to play!" suggests Jesse. He likes that idea. There's nothing like a good game of pool to take his mind off his problems. Hell, he remembers playing at _least_ ten rounds with himself after—

"Found it!"

Jesse pulls himself out of memory lane and turns to face the cabinet.

It's DeStorm. He's opened up the bottom of one of the pool cues, and inside is the salt they've been searching for. "I found the salt!" the Railroad Tycoon crows at the top of his voice.

"Put it in!" Gabbie shrieks. "Put it in!"

She holds out the bottle, and DeStorm fills it up with salt, grinning all the while. "That's why I'm a billionaire."

"I guess that's all the salt we need!" says Alex happily.

"No," DeStorm counters. "We gon' check the rest of these daggone sticks."

So they start checking the rest of the daggone sticks, and Jesse allows himself to relax. It's fine. It's _fine._ They've found the salt, or at least a bit of it, and it's almost time to save his friends and kill those vampire bastards.

But then, just as Tana starts talking about "maybe just get your hands a little closer together," the scariest vampire they've seen yet barges his way into the room.

"Oh, _shit!"_

All thoughts of heroism flee Jesse's mind, and he ends up behind a curtain once again. "Where was the _bell?"_ Has Alison betrayed them? Are they all gonna end up as vampire food?

Then, all of a sudden, Alison appears, a grim sort of courage painted onto her face. "Calvin!"

Scary Vampire Dude lunges for her. She dodges, then swings at him, and the whole thing quickly turns into a straight-up vampire fight.

"Oh, shit!" Jesse can't believe what he's seeing. Alison's taking on Scary Vampire Dude with all the skill of a seasoned fighter—countering his attacks, breaking down his defenses, kicking, punching, and was that a goddamn _flip?_ "Should I help?" 

He has about five seconds to think _why the hell did you just ask that, Jesse, the girl can handle herself,_ and then _oh God oh wow_ she just put Vamp in a _chokehold,_ and she's not going to rip his _throat_ out, is she?

She did. She goddamn _did._ Alison just straight-up _wrecked_ that fool, and now she's standing over his body with a _"I will break your spine and you will thank me for it"_ look in her eyes. 

_"Damn,_ girl," Jesse breathes, unable to think of anything else to say.

Alison wipes the blood from her mouth. "Still don't trust me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: What have Joey and Liza been up to this whole time? Have they been sitting around waiting to be rescued? No. No, they haven't. They're going to save themselves, and they're going to talk about card games while they do it.


	7. The Graceffa-Koshy Chronicles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joey and Liza save each other. A bond is formed in the process.

_What..._ happened _...to me?!?_

The world's a hazy mess of loud noises and bright lights, and Joey's too weak to distinguish any particular color or face. He can hear a voice—a man's voice—shout a volley of furious orders, though he has no idea who's ordering who. Or why.

"Lock the door! Board it! Secure the courtyard exit! The rest of you, follow me!"

Doors slam. Footsteps fade away. Joey takes a deep, jagged breath, struggling to overcome the pain of blood loss. His (admittedly fuzzy) memories of the past month or so consist entirely of faceless horrors and sneering vampires, and he wants nothing more than to get out of here and go home where he belongs.

 _The Victorian era,_ he tells himself. _I'm in the Victorian era. I have to get out, I can't stay here, Daniel's probably worried sick..._

"Why are we in chains?"

_Oh, no._

He knows that voice.

Sure enough, as the world comes back into focus, he sees a frantic Liza Koshy, chained by her wrists to an X-shaped post. "Joey!" She wriggles against her bonds. "What is this?"

"Ugh..." It doesn't take long for him to realize that he is _also_ chained to a post, and he winces. "How did _you_ get here?"

"How did _you_ get _me_ here? You invited me here, Joey!"

Joey examines his memories, trying to remember the last time he invited her to anything. He comes up short. "I did _not_ invite you here."

"Yes, you did! You invited us to a dinner party! _And this doesn't look like dinner!"_

 _A dinner party..._ Last year's demons return with a vengeance. The eight ghosts of the 1920s remind him constantly that _it's_ your _fault, Joey, we'd still be alive if you hadn't thrown that stupid dinner party._

But not this time. He didn't invite Liza here. He didn't invite _anyone_ here.

Someone set him up.

And now, he's scared for Liza. She's his _friend,_ and she's terrified, and she's a good person, and she's only twenty-one, and she's looking at him as if she expects him to get her out of here...

"What happened to you?" she asks. "Why are you beaten?"

He sighs. "I don't know...I don't remember really much..."

"What is that _tube_ coming out of you?" is her next anxious question.

Just like that, he remembers: men and women crowding around him with hungry eyes, their king insisting that _"we can't bite this one, he's bait to lure in tastier morsels, that's what the Sorceress said,"_ complaints of _"but I'm hungry!"_ and...and...

"They've been... _feeding_ off me."

 

 _Feeding?_ Did Liza hear that right? Have those fancy-schmancy vampires been _feeding_ off Joey like he's a freakin' _buffet?_ Oh, she is going to have some _words_ with them once she gets out of here.

But first things first. Escape. Save Joey. Find the others. _Then_ revenge.

"We need keys." She twists around in her chains. "We need keys, right?"

Joey points. "What's that lever?"

"What?" She looks around. _"This_ lever?" Lever. Yes. There's a lever on the ground, between her post and Joey's. "Okay." She reaches for it with her foot. "You're chained in. I'm not." All it takes is a small tap with her big toe to reverse the effects of the sucky collector thingamabob, sending Joey's blood rushing back into his veins. "Omigod. Did that hurt you?"

"Just do it," he insists.

Now, Liza loves Joey, but she wants to get the _heck_ out of this house. And this here lever is providing her with a _perfect_ means of doing that. So she does the only reasonable thing she can think of.

She kicks it.

One solid kick, and Joey's chains fall away, causing him to collapse onto the ground. He breaks out into one of his Joey grins almost instantly.

Liza smiles back. "Okay. You're free. I'm not. You're though."

He stares at her for a solid minute, apparently unable to comprehend the meaning of what she's just said, and exasperation builds like phlegm in her chest. _Hello? Hi, yes, excuse me, is_ anyone _gonna_ save _me?!?_

 

As Joey makes his way over to Liza, he remembers: she mentioned an _us._ She's not the only one who's been forced into his nightmares. "Who else is here?"

"I don't know!"

"What's going on?"

She stares at him with wide brown eyes, and he sees his own panic reflected in her pupils. "All of us are here to see you for our dinner party. There's...there's..." She stammers, then gives up. "I forgot everybody's names."

Joey grabs the necessary key and gets to work on her chains, but her words are still boring holes into his brain. _All of us..._ No. Not again. He promised himself that there'd _never_ be another party like the one last year. Someone's taken advantage of him...sent invitations using his name... _what happened who did this why why why why why?_

Liza's still talking. "A bunch of people here were invited to come to _your_ dinner party."

"That wasn't me, I can tell you that," he says through gritted teeth. "Do you think I would invite you and then just be chained up here?"

"I don't know! You don't remember how you got chained up—it could be your kink!"

"Kink?"

"I don't know...if you're kinky like that..." Her expression is almost apologetic, but there's still a touch of playfulness in her voice. "Eh? No? That not a thing?"

"No."

She shrugs, then turns her attention to more important matters. "Wait...how did _you_ get here? You have no idea how?"

He shakes his head. "I just remember...like..." _Pain. Ice-cold laughter. Blood draining from his body._ "Oh. Got it." He uses the key to remove her chained hands from the post. "I just..." _Losing strength, losing hope, losing everything except the will to live._ "I don't know."

A horrible hypothetical jumps into his head: Liza—bright, energetic, happy Liza—in his position, sobbing as she's sucked dry by hordes of hungry vampires. Liza, alone, barely hanging on to consciousness, that special Liza light fading from her eyes.

He doesn't want that for her.

So he frees her from her bonds, and she breathes a sigh of relief ("Oh...that felt so good..."), and he promises himself that he's going to find a way to get her out of this place. He's going to save her. Tonight will _not_ be where her story ends.

Then, he remembers Justine and Lele. He promised. He _failed._

Never again.

 

"Let's get the F out of here," says Joey, climbing down from the stage where they were kept.

"Okay." Liza couldn't agree more. _"Please."_ Thank God they have each other. She wouldn't have been able to free herself if it was just _her_ stuck here, and something tells her that the vampires aren't interested in hearing her puns.

They scurry around the room, their eyes peeled for an exit, but all they find is a single pair of doors—and said pair of doors is currently being guarded by a particularly mean-looking vampire. Joey sighs. "Okay. Uh. Maybe there's some sort of thing that we could use to lure him away."

"Lure him..." It hits Liza like a lightning bolt. "Your blood!"

"My _blood?"_

"What if you use your blood to lure him away?"

She's expecting him to protest (and she honestly wouldn't blame him if he did), but his face lights up. "That's a good idea!"

"Wanna put some blood in the goblet?" _That's a sentence I just said._

"Yeah," he agrees. "Let's try it."

"Okay."

So they go to put blood in the goblet, but then Joey gets distracted by a weird-looking symbol on the machine. "Wait, what's that?" He points. "It looks like something goes there."

Knowing how complicated machines can be, he's probably right. "Oh."

"Do you know what that symbol is?" His voice is stuffed to the brim with an overenthusiastic kind of hope. "That's the symbol for life. I'm pretty sure."

"How do you know that?"

"I played Yu-Gi-Oh as a kid, and there was like, uh...a card on there...that said..."

He creates a card out of his fingers, but Liza's not really following this You-Gee-Oh stuff. "I didn't go to college," she admits sheepishly. "I'm not very educated."

"Yu-Gi-Oh's a card game."

"Oh!" She shrugs, feeling even stupider now than she did before. "I guess you don't have to go to college for that."

She tries to come up with a good pun for Yu-Gi-Oh, but Joey's already forgotten about it, and now he's examining the rest of the machine. "Oh, wait!" He's found something. "Look!"

Liza joins him. "Oh! There's a note!"

_The machine holds the secret to slaying the king of the vampires._

"The machine holds the secret..." Liza's first instinct is to try and open up the damn machine, but _nope._ "It's locked."

"We need to find the key." Joey throws up his hands. _"Another_ frickin' key."

"The keys that we have!"

"Wait, you _have_ the key?"

"Wait...no..." The keys, the _keys,_ the set of bronze keys that Joey used to free her from her chains. She picks them up and holds them to the light. "The keys that we used!"

"These look _very_ different."

They spend the next several minutes testing out every key on the box, but none of them work. Liza squints at the keyhole, wondering what on earth they're doing wrong, when it hits her: _I've seen this shape before._

"Omigod."

The _spoon._ The spoon-shaped thingamabob that came with her invitation. _A useful object,_ it said.

"Does _this_ work?"

It's pinned to her jacket, so she pries it off and holds it up for Joey to see. He responds with his Big Dramatic Joey Gasp. _"No!"_

"Does _this_ work?" repeats Liza, her tone laced with disbelief. _This is a_ key? _Why did I get a key? Why was this key on my body?_

Joey tries it, and sure enough, it works. "Whoa!" he shouts. "That's so sick!"

"Omigod," Liza exclaims. "Omigod...wait. Am I a vampire? That makes me so confused." She checks herself. She has no interest in sucking Joey's blood, so she thinks she's good. "We got it off. Open it."

They open it. Inside, they find—

"It's a book!"

And not just _any_ book. There's a weird-looking face carved into the wooden cover. "It's a woman," Joey remarks, and he's right, except the woman appears to be half Gorgon and half Old Man in the Sea. _See? I'm smart. I know things._

"Omigod." Liza picks up the book, unable to take her eyes off its cover. "That looks like my grandma."

 

Together, Joey and Liza read the book.

_The wooden stake of Van Helsing, the great hunter of vampires, is..._

"Enboing?" Joey trips over the next word. "Enbwey? Embed?"

Liza shakes her head. "I didn't go to college, remember?"

"Oh." Of course. For once, he's on his own. "Emboyded." That's probably wrong, but he doesn't care.

_...with a dark magic from the blood of a thousand dead vampires. To prevent it from being used to kill him, Dorian kept it here in the ballroom. Three ankhs must be placed in the machine and turned upside down to reveal its location._

"That's an ankh!" Liza exclaims, pointing to the symbol on the machine. "That little thing that you said symbolized life!" She purses her lips. "There's three of them in this room."

Joey shrugs. "Okay. Let's look."

So they start looking. "Ankh!" Liza calls, as if the ankhs are children playing hide-and-seek with her. Joey smiles. He doesn't know how she's managed to stay so cheerful, considering their situation, but he's grateful for it.

He points to an odd-looking pattern on the wall. "Okay, this sorta _looks_ suspicious."

But before he has a chance to investigate it further, Liza shouts "Hello!" and pushes past him to get to one of the many vase displays in the room. In no time flat, she's found the first ankh. "Check that one," she orders Joey, pointing to another vase display. "Check that one."

Joey checks, hoping to replicate her early success. No luck.

"Don't go too close to the window," Liza warns.

It's a pointless warning. The thought of the burly vampire guard is enough to keep Joey as far away from the window as possible. _Keep looking._ His eyes dart around the room. _If I was an ankh, where would I be?_

"Hold on." Liza peers at a bench. "I think I just—" Her eyes widen, and she darts under the seat before Joey can react. "I found another one!"

"Girl," Joey gasps. "Omigod."

She leaps to her feet, an ankh in each hand. "Omigod." A childish sort of pride permeates her voice. "I am _such_ a good Explorer. I found _two_ of them!"

"You really are." Joey doesn't know why, but he feels like a proud father whose daughter has just scored the game-winning point.

Liza grins and keeps looking.

Joey sighs. "I wanna find one!" He's still a little out of it from the blood loss, so his searching capabilities are not at their full potential. _Ugh._ He feels like _such_ a waste. Liza's doing all the work, and he's just stumbling around like an idiot.

"Okay," mutters Liza. "It's _really_ hidden. That was underneath a _seat._ Maybe this one's more in, like, plain sight?"

__

__

"Yeah. Good thinking."

And then, she's off like a little brown shot, darting towards a clock. "C'mere c'mere c'mere!"

"Are you _insane?"_

"I think it's in there." She gestures to the inside of the clock. "I think it's in there. Is it in there?"

Joey's tired of relying on her, so he approaches the clock and investigates its insides by himself. "Yes! It is!" He grabs the third and last ankh. "Omigod, I found it! I found the last one!"

"No, you didn't," Liza giggles.

_Shh. Let me have my moment._

 

Now that they have the three crosses (that _Liza_ found, thank you very much), it's time to put them onto the machine where they belong. Oh, yeah, and then they _also_ have to flip them upside down, because combinations and stuff.

At any rate, they get it done, and a giant curtain unravels from the ceiling to reveal a) another book, this one with an especially pretty dark blue color, and b) a giant black stake.

Joey's mouth drops open. "What the _heck_ is that?"

They grab both items. Joey examines the inscription carved into the stake, while Liza peeks over his shoulder.

_The only way past your guard is to impale him in the heart._

__

__

Joey turns to face Liza, his eyes wide. "We have to _murder_ him."

It takes Liza a moment to process this information. "We have to _kill_ him?" No! She can't do this! She's never killed _anybody_ before, let _alone_ a vampire! _Who do you think I am? Buffy the Vampire Slayer? More like Liza the Little Brown Girl Who Just Wants To Go Home._

 

"Are you into murdering?" Liza asks Joey as they head for the door.

_Short answer: yes._

"Let's go for it."

"You _do_ got a lot to pay back for," realizes Liza. "They took a _lot_ of your blood."

She's right. And yet...these vampires' crimes go beyond just taking his blood. They've kept him as their prisoner for God knows how long, stolen his hope, put his friends in danger, and almost drained the life right out of him. Now that he's free, it's time for Joey to get his revenge on them all.

Starting with the one waiting for them outside.

Together, Joey and Liza open the door. Joey shouts "Hey!" to attract the guard's attention, then stabs...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Happiness, followed by sheer terror, followed by another game of death. Also, Joey has that Jacqueline Irvine song playing in his mind, Gabbie accuses Alex of being a bad boyfriend, and DeStorm looks out for number one.


	8. Here We Go Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone reunites, attempts to escape, and then realizes that _omigod, they are really doing this again, omigod._ At least there's no exploding cars this time!

Joey stabs the vampire guard straight through the chest. The guard blinks, staggers back a few steps, and collapses dead on the ground.

Liza's mouth drops open. _Wow._ "You did it!" she says through nervous giggles, unable to take her eyes off of the vampire corpse in front of her. _Joey, my Joey, the same Joey who makes videos about playing with fidget toys, has just gone all Vampire Slayer on this guy. What is life?_

"Wait." Her friends race through her mind, and a twinge of worry twists itself around her heart. "What about everyone else?"

Joey's eyes grow wide with concern. "Let's go find them. Come on."

"Okay."

 

"Still don't trust me?" Alison snarls.

Oh, no. Jesse trusts her now. Jesse trusts this chick with his _life._ Any vampire who would take out one of their own kind to protect a bunch of humans they just met...yeah. She's on their side. He's sure of it.

She starts shouting orders. "Jesse! DeStorm! Come here. I need your help. We gotta get him out of here."

 _I'm on it._ Jesse races over to the dead vamp, anxious to _finally_ prove himself to the team. He and DeStorm each take an arm, and together, they lift the corpse into a sitting position.

"Men, do that," says Tyler, who _still_ hasn't left the safety of his curtain.

"Honey," Tana clucks at the corpse, "we need to get you a makeup wipe."

DeStorm grabs the legs. Jesse supports the upper body, his arms securely fastened underneath the shoulders. "Don't go too far," Alison warns them. "Stay close to me."

"This is called a fireman's carry," Jesse brags as they carry Vamp out. "I learned this one in the military."

"The only Carey _I_ know is Mariah," is DeStorm's flippant reply.

 

For a while, Joey hopes that Liza's lying, that she's the only one here with him, that no one else has been exposed to the horrors of this house. Yes, he remembers a few blurry faces and indistinguishable voices from earlier, but they could've been hallucinations brought on by all the blood loss. There's still hope. Isn't there?

But that's before they find Andrea Russett and Lauren Riihimaki, tied to pillars in the courtyard, scared out of their minds.

His heart sinks.

 

Lauren has never been happier to see Joey and Liza in her life. _They're here,_ her heart sings. _They're still alive. The vampires didn't get them. They'll save us. Everything's gonna be okay._

Liza goes to free Andrea, while Joey runs to Lauren's side. "How'd you get out?" Lauren gasps as he unties her. "Omigosh..."

"What happened?" is all that Joey manages to get out before Lauren envelops him in a hug. "Hi. It's good to see you."

"Omigosh! You're okay! Hello!" Lauren's a broken record of happy sounds, but she doesn't care. She _knew_ it. She _knew_ they'd make it out. She _knew_ they'd come for her. Now, all they have to do is find the others, find the salt, and find their way back home.

 _Home..._ her stuffies...her nice warm bed...her unfinished DIY projects...

"Joey killed a _vampire!"_

__

__

Liza's proud proclamation catches both Lauren and Andrea off guard. "You killed a _vampire?"_ they squeal in unison.

He nods and holds out his hand for a high-five. "Yeah."

Lauren isn't quite sure how to react to that _(Joey Graceffa, vampire hunter? Wish I could've seen it, but...how?)_ , so she accepts Joey's high-five and tries not to think about it too hard.

"What do we do now?" Andrea asks.

It's around this point that Alex's face pops into Lauren's mind. Where _is_ he? Isn't he supposed to be her knight in shining armor? Why isn't _he_ here to save her?

 _Lauren, calm down. He's probably scared. And, really, can you blame him?_

 

Lauren, Andrea, and Liza talk among themselves, and Joey's not really paying attention the conversation—until Lauren's statement of "I think she also meant that _she's_ being held here" awakens his curiosity.

"Who is this _she?"_ he demands to know.

"Alison!"

"His daughter."

Joey scowls. _Dorian's daughter..._ "I already don't trust her."

"Really?"

"If you saw what the vampires did to me..." _It hurts. The machines whirr in his ears. His eyes grow heavy, as if unconsciousness can save him from this hell._ "You would not... _ever_...trust the vampires."

"They were _eating_ him," Liza tells the other two, and concern assaults their expressions.

 _It's fine._ Joey straightens himself into a confident posture. _I'm fine. It's over._ "Let's get out of here."

 

As DeStorm and Jesse dump the body behind a tree, Alex is beginning to get anxious. "Who has the salt?" _Come on, come_ on, _we have to_ go, _we can't...we have to...hurry..._

"I have the salt," Gabbie replies.

"Okay. Good." Traces of fear taint Tyler's voice. "We are dwindling in numbers."

And then, four figures appear in the distance, and Alex's heart almost stops. Could it be?

It is.

"Joey!"

"Liza!"

"Andrea!"

_"Lauren!"_

What follows is a scene straight out of a rom-com ending. Gabbie hugs Joey, then does the same to Liza, sobbing "oh, thank God" into the smaller girl's hair. Tyler and Andrea practically crush each other in an overenthusiastic embrace, while Tana throws her arms around Joey's neck.

And Alex...he barely acknowledges Joey's pat on the back. His focus is on Lauren.

"You're _back!"_ He pulls her into his arms, his body trembling with relief. "I thought..."

"Thought what?" she asks.

He shakes his head. "Never mind."

"Did you find the salt?"

"Course I did." He grins at her, projecting an aura of heroic confidence, forcing his fear out of sight. "It's over, okay? You're safe now. I'll get you out of here."

She relaxes against his chest. "Hope you're right," she murmurs. "I'm scared. I wanna go home."

 _My girlfriend is back._ Alex closes his eyes and breathes in the lavender scent of Lauren's perfume. _And I'm never letting her get taken again._

 

"Joey!" Tyler has _several_ questions. "Where have you been?" _Joey Graceffa. Why? Of all people...why did you invite_ me? _I don't wanna be here. I don't want any part of your vampire shenanigans. Why did you lure me into this death trap?_

 _Do you hate me_ that _much?_

Joey shakes his head, a grave expression darkening his face. "I don't know why you guys are here."

"You _invited_ us!" yells Gabbie.

"No!" Liza protests. "He didn't!"

"I swear, I did _not_ invite you guys here," Joey insists between breaths. "This was _not_ supposed to happen."

Regret and sincerity mingle in his voice, and Tyler finds himself believing him. _He's been gone for so long...I came to this party because I wanted to find him...this isn't his fault. It can't be. But...if not him...then who? And why?_

Joey sees Alison, and his gaze grows dangerously cold. "Stay away."

"No!" the others shout. "She's here for us!"

"I told you my father was lying to you," Alison explains, a nervous quiver infecting her otherwise strong voice. "This isn't his estate. The owner is a sorceress. If she has eyes on you, your days in this world are numbered."

Andrea frowns. "Wait. Is she here?"

 _A sorceress._ Tyler's blood runs cold. _Of_ course. _It all makes sense now. If a sorceress owns this place, then_ she's _probably the one who summoned us here._

Alison's still talking. "The only way home is in the carriage that you came. It's this way." She takes off, and the others follow her, desperate for the comforts of 2017.

 

"I don't know if I trust her right now," Andrea mutters, casting suspicious glances at the back of Alison's head.

Gabbie has more pressing issues in mind. "Alex let Lauren get taken!"

 _"What?"_ Liza squawks. "Aren't they dating?"

Alex is carrying Lauren's train, acting like a goddamn gentleman, but Gabbie's not sure if that makes up for his wimpy behavior from earlier. Guys shouldn't let their girls get kidnapped by vampires. That's, like, the number-one rule of romance. "I would break up if I was you!"

"Hey!" Alex snaps. "We got her back! That's all that matters!"

"Let's get the F out of here," is all Jesse has to say.

 _Yes. Let's._ Gabbie pushes Laurex out of her mind and focuses on 2017. They're almost there. They just have to make it to the carriages, and then they'll be able to leave this vampire-infested hellhole forever. 

And _then,_ once they're home, she's _totally_ gonna turn this whole thing into a storytime. Unless Tana beats her to it. No, wait! Maybe they can collab! That would be fun! She hasn't done a collab with Tana in a while, so—

Wait.

Where the _hell_ are the carriages?

No. They're here. They've _got_ to be. She remembers parking in this very driveway, her hot chauffeur being all like _"now go in and enjoy yourself, ma'am, I'll be right here when you're done,"_ and her being all like _"aw, thanks, babe, can I have your number?"_ Sure, she didn't get his number, because her love life sucks, but the carriages were _here._ All nine of them. And now...

"Where's the carriage?" asks Lauren.

"Where's the _carriage?"_ Jesse echoes.

"I'm sorry." Alison shakes her head. "It looks like you're stuck here."

"What?"

"Are you kidding me?"

Gabbie's hands curl into fists. This can't be happening. She won't accept it. She _has_ to get out of here. _Now._

A furious Joey points his stake directly at Alison's heart. "Listen up, _Alison,"_ he snarls through clenched teeth. "You're going to find us another way out of here. You hear me?"

Alison somehow manages to keep her composure. "Calm down."

"Don't tell me to _calm down!"_

"Maybe _this_ could help us get out of here," Liza suggests, holding up a weird book of some sort.

As soon as she sees the book, Alison's mouth drops open. "Where did you get that?"

"We found it downstairs," explains Joey.

"Yeah," Liza stammers. She looks and sounds like a scared little kid, and Gabbie has a sudden urge to wrap her in a blanket. "We found it in the place."

Alison takes the book from her. As she examines it, shock and surprise flicker across her face. "There are only rumors that this even existed."

"What _is_ it?" several people ask.

Liza squirms in her shoes. "I dunno. It's just a journal. I..." She gulps. "I found it."

"It's not safe out here," says Alison, conviction in her voice. "Come with me."

 _Dammit._ As they head back inside, Gabbie's cursing her horrible luck. _We're trapped. We're stuck in the Victorian Vampire Capital of the World, and if we don't leave soon, we're gonna end up as their dinner after all._

She hopes to God that there's another way out. For everyone's sake.

 

They file into the lounge. "This is _beautiful,"_ Liza gasps, and Tana's inclined to agree. Despite everything, this house is still a stunning masterpiece, with interior decoration straight from her dreams. It's perfect. _Too_ perfect.

_I should've known._

"I mean, I would be able to take it in, if there weren't _vampires,"_ Tyler sighs.

"Wait!" Gabbie points to a gigantic painting over the fireplace. "Who's _that?"_

"That" is a woman. She's beautiful, in a dangerous sort of way, and her deep V-cut is _far_ more revealing that Tana's exposed cleavage. There's a demented look in her dark eyes, as if she plans to murder everyone within a hundred-mile radius. Honestly, just _looking_ at her is enough to give Tana the creeps.

"That's the lady that she was talking about!" Jesse realizes aloud.

Alison nods. "That's the sorceress who owns the estate."

 _Oh, no._ Goosebumps dance like ballerinas across Tana's skin. _If_ that's _the sorceress..._

Before she can finish that thought, Alison starts speaking again. "There's a crown that's rumored to be the tool to take her down. This journal..." She holds up the journal Liza found. "...tells us how to get it."

She hands the journal back to Liza, who stares at it with a quizzical look on her face. "How do we unlock it?" the Explorer asks.

Joey peers at its hinges. "It looks like it needs a key."

Tana's eyes dart around the room, looking for someone who has _any_ idea what the heck is going on. All of them (except for Lauren and Alex, who are too busy cuddling to care) are staring at the journal with befuddled expressions on their faces. Good. At least she's not the _only_ one who's clueless.

_Wait a minute..._

Why is DeStorm smiling like that?

 

 _Hold up._ As soon as Joey says the bit about the key, the answer hits DeStorm like a ton of bricks. _I can open this little Bible-looking book no problem. I got a key on my watch!_

So that's exactly what he says. "I have a key on my watch."

"That seems suspicious," Joey frets. "Why do you have a _key,_ first of all?"

It's _not_ suspicious. It's his useful object. They all got useful objects, remember? But DeStorm's too tired to explain that to the others, so he just smiles a slow, sneaky smile. "Come on." He holds his hand out for the journal. "Pass me the book."

"Pass me the _watch,"_ Liza shoots back.

 _Okay. I see. You wanna make it like that?_ "What's the matter? Don't trust me?"

"No."

"She's right," pipes up Lauren. "You're _super_ shady. Why do you have the key already on your person?"

DeStorm rolls his eyes at the ceiling. Great. Just great. An hour into this crazy adventure, and they're already turning on him. "Just gimme the damn book and let me—"

"No!" Liza hugs the journal to her chest. "The watch! Hand it over!"

All of a sudden, Jesse Wellens springs to his feet, his gun drawn. "How 'bout y'all pass them _both_ to _me?"_

 _Well, damn._ DeStorm isn't one to say no to Jesse's badassery, so he shrugs and shoves his watch at the Outlaw. Liza, too, prepares to hand over the journal, muttering "good Lord" under her breath.

Jesse turns pale. "Never mind," he gulps, returning his gun to its holster. "Don't want the responsibility."

DeStorm shakes his head. _All bark and no bite, huh, Jess?_ "Come on," he hisses in Liza's direction.

She throws the book at him.

"Omigosh," Lauren gasps. "You just _threw_ the sorcer—"

"I just have to say," remarks Joey as DeStorm gets to work on the lock, "if this key _works,_ doesn't that..."

It works.

Now, DeStorm's expecting some appreciation for his service. Like _"oh, wow, DeStorm, you're so awesome, we're glad you're still alive,"_ or at _least_ a _"thank you."_ But does he get it? No. All he gets is a barrage of angry questions.

"Wait, it _worked?"_

"Where did you get the watch from?"

"Why does he have the key _and_ the watch?"

So they're still suspicious of him. Okay. That's fine. He doesn't care. He's not here for them anyway. He just came for the party.

 

"Okay!" shouts Liza. "Read it! Read it! Read it!"

DeStorm reads it.

_If you seek the Crown of Oblivion, be prepared for the death to follow._

Lauren frowns. _Be prepared for death?_ She's already almost died twice tonight. She can't _handle_ death. She doesn't want to lose any of her friends, and she _certainly_ doesn't want to die herself. _Maybe it means that we're gonna have to watch a stranger die?_

She can only hope.

_The Sorceress was once a peasant girl who made a deal with a cursed god for power. She murdered the keeper of this estate and trapped it in time so she might live forever. She has been gathering an army in preparation for a spell that will open a portal to the modern world...and make her empress of all time._

_The spell requires the evil Joey—_

"Joey?"

"Joey!"

Mayhem breaks out. Everyone's yelling at once, pointing at Joey with accusatory fingers. As for Joey himself, he twists his face into a suspiciously goofy smile. "It does _not_ say that. He's lying."

"I just saw your name!" DeStorm insists.

Alex bites his lip, his brown eyes bouncing from Joey to DeStorm and back again. "Let's not point fingers..."

Joey grabs the journal from DeStorm. "The spell requires the evil Joey _carried!"_ he shouts triumphantly.

"Okay!" DeStorm throws up his hands. "I'm just making sure!"

But Joey isn't done with DeStorm yet. "Okay, _that's_ misleading!"

"Were you trying to frame Joey?" Tana wants to know.

Joey and DeStorm get into a brief tussle, but Lauren's more concerned with the fact that Joey's name is randomly in the journal. Why? Is he hiding something? What if he lied, and he _did_ invite them here after all?

"Read the rest," she tells him.

_The spell requires the evil Joey carried with him and nine innocent lives from the modern day. There are eight gems of power kept by the lieutenants. If they can be gathered and placed in the map, the crown will be revealed. The wearer of the crown will have the power to stop her spell and return home._

_However, obtaining a gem will require unraveling dark mysteries and voting on two who must undertake a terrible challenge that will end in death._

_Time is short. By morning, her spell will be complete, and there will be no future to return to._

Lauren feels sick. "Someone has to _die_ for this," she spits, her voice a shaking mess. If they do nothing, everything they've ever known will be destroyed by the Sorceress's spell...but if they _accept_ this awful quest, eight of them will die.

"Someone has to die for a gem," Joey concurs.

Her friends could die. Alex could die. She, Lauren, could _die_ in this dreadful place.

The thought is terrifying.

 

 _So in order to get a gem, someone has to die each time._ DeStorm shrugs. _That's cool. Ain't gonna be me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The quest for the first gem commences. Also, Tyler steps up as a leader, Jesse gets to do something useful, and everyone has fun with rope-related shenanigans.


	9. Sunstone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First order of business: they must obtain a sunstone. This proves to be more complicated than it initially appears.

As soon as he realizes that this party is going to end in death, Tyler's throat goes dry. _No._ He didn't ask for this. He didn't ask for _any_ of this. He came to find Joey, not to play a killing game.

There's another way, isn't there?

No. There isn't.

_I'm...going to...die..._

"My father wears a gem around his necklace," says Alison. "I've seen it before." She pauses, her eyes swimming in apprehension, then speaks again. "If we find the sunstone, we have everything we need to destroy him."

Tyler pushes his despair to the back of his mind. "I have the map." He pulls the half-map out of his pocket and places it on the table.

Gabbie snatches it up, her face scarred with anxiety. "This is only half the map!" she complains. "We don't know where the other half is!"

"That's true," says Liza.

_Breathe, Tyler. Breathe. It's gonna be fine. Keep calm. You'll be okay._

"The logical thing to do here," Tyler tells the group in a voice much stronger than he feels, "is to look at the map, find the rest of it, and go from there." He takes the map from Gabbie, forcing himself into Confident Tyler Mode, hoping against hope that they can't sense his fear.

"Is there anything we can do with what we have on the map so far?" Joey squints over Tyler's shoulder. "It looks like there's figures of people on there."

He's right. Tiny stick figures litter the paper, each one standing in a numbered spot. There are also two obelisks and two hands at the bottom of the map. Tyler frowns. "Maybe we should try holding the obelisks. See if _that_ does anything."

"I lived in DC before," DeStorm pipes up. "I know what an obelisk is."

_Thank you, DeStorm, for that incredibly useful bit of information._

Joey heads for the obelisks. "Put those two things together," orders DeStorm. "Grab the obelisks."

"One person holds both of them in each hand," adds Jesse.

DeStorm nods. "And see what happens."

 _See what happens..._ Tyler wears his brave expression like a mask. _I can do this...I'm not scared..._

_I'm scared._

 

"These are _really_ heavy," Joey complains, an obelisk in each of his shaking hands.

He stands there.

Jesse hopes that the lights are gonna flicker or something, but nothing happens. "Hmmph." He scans the area. They're missing something. It's _got_ to be here _somewhere._

Sure enough, the table's lit up, and the missing map piece has been found.

"Yo." Jesse waves at the group. "Come here. It's the other half of the map. Right here." His apathetic-sounding voice conceals his joyful pride. "There's the other half."

One problem: the map's stuck behind a pane of glass. Clearly, more work must be done.

As Joey runs to the group, he puts the obelisks down, which causes the glass map to go dark. "No," sighs Jesse. "Touch 'em again."

"Touch them together!" shouts Alex. "Touch them together!"

Joey grabs the obelisks, and the map lights up again. "What does it say?" the Savant squeals as he rejoins the others.

_Stand in high places to see the shape of a sunstone's eye._

__

__

Joey stands on a chair, obelisks in hand, and immediately starts complaining. "This is _heavy,_ guys. I gotta put this down. Can someone take it over?"

 _Man up, kid._ Jesse rolls his eyes. _All our lives are at stake, and here you are, acting like a baby. Just hold the goddamn obelisks and stop whining._

"Wait! Joey!" Tana cries as the map darkens once more. "Put them back together!"

 _"Hold_ them!" Tyler insists.

Joey sighs dramatically. Jesse's sorely tempted to punch him right in the teeth. Fortunately for his sanity, DeStorm takes over the obelisks, and they're _finally_ able to get a clear view of the map.

 

"Guys." Joey's glad to be back on the ground, since it means that he doesn't have to hold the super-heavy obelisks anymore. But just because he isn't holding the obelisks doesn't mean that he can't help in _other_ ways. "I have an idea. We have this paper. We can, like, draw a sketch of it."

So that's what they do. They use a bit of parchment to trace the glass-encased side of the map. Once that's done, they put the two pieces together, revealing the Complete Guide to Sunstone Retrieval.

Tyler takes command. "Here's what's gonna happen. Each of us, I think, has to take one spot in this order." As he points to the stick figures on the map, he's practically oozing confidence, and Joey envies the courage in his voice.

"Count us off," Gabbie tells him.

"Okay." Tyler points at Liza. "One."

She nods. "One."

Tyler keeps counting. Lauren is Two, Jesse is Three, DeStorm is Four, Joey is Five (he takes his number with stomach-churning apprehension), Gabbie is Six, Alex is Seven, Tana is Eight, Tyler is Nine, and Andrea is Ten. "Okay!" chirps Alex. "Memorize your spots!"

"Let's go over there," says Tyler.

They head for the hallway. Joey's still mad at himself for accidentally starting _another_ game of death, but there's no turning back now. All he can do is cross his fingers and hope for a miracle.

 

Just as the group is about to enter the foyer, Joey stops short. "There's a vampire!" he hisses. "There's a vampire!"

Andrea checks. He's right. And it's not just _any_ vampire—it's Vera, the one who captured her, the one who wants her blood. Andrea's lungs tighten in her chest, and she, along with everyone else, ducks out of sight.

A full minute of terror goes by before Alison speaks up. "It's safe. She's gone."

"Where did she _go?"_ asks Joey.

Who cares? She's not near Andrea, and that's all that matters.

"Tyler," gasps Joey. "Quick. Before she comes back."

Jesse nods. "Yeah. They're gonna come back."

"Okay!" Tyler rushes to the front of the group, map in one hand, quill in the other. The look in his eyes reminds Andrea of an animal trying to outsmart a predator. "So we need ten people in ten spots."

"I'm One," says Liza.

"One?" Tyler points to a spot near the doorway. "Here."

 _Ten,_ Andrea reminds herself. _I'm Ten. Which means..._ "So I'm all the way at the top?"

Tyler nods. "You're at the top." As Andrea scurries up the stairs, he turns his attention to the others. "You're Five...Seven...Three...Eight, go right here..."

Andrea takes her position at the top of the stairs. She watches Tyler guide everyone to their spots, and once they're all placed, she starts searching the area, hoping to find something useful.

"There's a path," Tyler remarks, "but do you think we need to _take_ something on that path?"

Joey frowns. "Wait, what?"

"We need to move," says Liza. "In order."

"What do you mean, 'move in order?'" asks Joey.

"The lines?" suggests Alex. "Do we just follow..."

Andrea isn't listening. She's just discovered a brown box, sitting on a stand, completely unattended. Something tells her that this box is the key to solving their current dilemma.

"There's ten spots and ten of us," Joey insists, waving his arms around as he talks. "I feel like this is right."

Tyler bites his lip. "We're in the spots. Can you see anything?"

That's when Andrea opens the box. Inside is a jumble of brown rope, and it becomes obvious what they have to do. "Wait" she shouts. "You guys! There's a rope!"

Joey wrinkles his nose in confusion. "Rope?"

 _"Oh,"_ says Alex, realization dawning on his face.

Gabbie, too, understands their task. "We have to hold the rope."

Of _course_ they do. The dotted lines on the map represent the rope. They have to do some weird rope puzzle, and somehow, that's going to lead them to the sunstone. And after that...

Andrea ignores all thoughts of death and hands Tyler the rope.

 

So now they're passing a rope around, creating a crazy pattern, because a piece of parchment told them to. None of Liza's Ikea adventures could have _possibly_ prepared her for this.

"Just go to your spot!" shouts Tyler for the twentieth time. The blonde's an okay leader, but he needs to tone it down a bit. He's acting like a freakin' drill sergeant, and Liza doesn't remember signing up for the U.S. Army (not that they'd _want_ her). "Everyone knows their number?"

Everyone knows their number.

"So who's One?"

Liza raises her hand. "One!" _Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh, duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh, we are Number One..._

Tana chuckles. "How many YouTubers does it take to make a puzzle out of some damn rope?"

Tyler ignores her. "And you have your end?" he asks Andrea, who's still at the top of the stairs. She nods.

"We're all connected!" says Alex with a smile.

The words are barely out of his mouth when a box next to him flies open. He grabs what's inside, shows it to the group, and _yes! The sunstone! We are on a_ roll!

"So we have the sunstone, we have the stake, and we have the salt," says Gabbie, summarizing an hour's worth of work.

Alex's mouth sets into a straight line. "Now we have to figure out how to kill the king."

The king? Oh. Right. They're still vampire slayers. They gotta take out Dorian, and then, if they're lucky, they'll get to go back to 2017 without any casualties.

"We just need _him."_

Okay, it probably won't be _that_ easy, but a girl can dream. Can't she?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Andrea takes on a dangerous mission that could very well be the death of her. Also, Lauren doesn't trust herself, and Alex prepares to flash the vampire king.


	10. Andrea Undercover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Andrea's time to shine...but will this house claim her as its first victim?

"So," asks Alex in nervous tones, "how do we do this?"

"Every full moon, my father gives a vampire the opportunity to dine with him alone," Alison explains. "If the vampire answers the riddle that he asks correctly, they get his honor. But if they answer _in_ correctly, the vampire is drained of all their blood."

 _Drained of all their blood?!?_ Lauren's heart almost stops at the thought.

Alison's voice is oddly calm, considering the circumstances. "Being his daughter, I have the privilege of knowing the answer. Who would like to go in?"

Fear seizes Lauren's spirit. Going in there...facing all those vampires...risking her blood on a _riddle_ of all things...the thought alone is enough to paralyze her. "I can't." The words burst out of her chest like frightened fireworks. "That's too much pressure." 

"Do it for the team," is DeStorm's reply.

 _"I'll_ do it," says Andrea with a shrug. "I'm good at riddles."

Joey gives the dark-haired girl a cursory glance, then turns his attention back to Lauren. "Are you _sure_ you don't wanna do it, Lauren?"

Yes! She's sure! She's not confident enough! Why is Joey putting her in such an awkward spot? _Especially_ after Andrea—who's stronger, smarter, and braver than Lauren could ever hope to be—just volunteered?

"No, no, no." Alex's arm tightens around her waist. "Not my Lauren."

But Joey's judgmental stare doesn't leave Lauren for a good two minutes, and she can't shake the feeling that she's done something wrong.

 

Lauren's a sweet girl. Really. She is. But she's not pulling her weight. Everyone else is helping out in whatever way they can, and she's just been hiding in the shadows this whole time.

She's terrified. They don't have time for that.

 _"This is about survival,"_ a voice from Joey's past whispers in his ear, and he grits his teeth in a desperate effort to ignore what is to come. "Okay!" His voice is laced with fake happiness. "Andrea it is!"

 

Andrea can't believe that she's just volunteered to infiltrate vampire headquarters. _What the hell are you thinking?_ her mind screams. _You? An undercover vampire? Do you_ want _to die?_

She ignores her brain. There's a job to do, so she might as well get it done.

Alison turns to face Andrea, admiration in her dark eyes. "The answer to the riddle will be 'history,'" she informs her. "We have one problem."

 _Problem?_ Andrea furrows her brow, pushing her fear to the back of her throat. _What problem?_

"We have to get the human scent off you."

And that's how Andrea Russett finds herself in the courtyard, face-to-face with a vampire corpse (the same vampire that Alison killed earlier, no less). Their guide positions his body to reveal the gaping wound in his throat.

"In order to remove the human scent from your body," says Alison, "you must take two big gulps of this vampire's blood."

Andrea blinks. _"What."_

"Drink it!" shouts Alex.

"Girl," Joey chuckles, "you signed up for this."

"Omigod!" This is _not_ what Andrea was expecting. Sneaking into vampire headquarters is one thing, but drinking _blood?_ "For _real?"_ she cries. "Is this okay to do?"

"Yes! Go!"

As much as this scenario is grossing Andrea out, she has no choice if she wants to do her job properly. So she takes a deep breath, tries not to throw up, and sucks the vampire's blood.

It tastes _awful._ It's like someone concocted the world's most disgusting beer, left it out to go stale for twelve decades, added a liberal dose of cat vomit, mixed it with blood, and made her drink it. Her insides hurt, and her sense of duty is the only thing preventing her from spitting out the blood and changing her mind.

"You have to swallow it!" Joey reminds her, as if she didn't already know that.

Tana claps her hands like an overenthusiastic two-year-old. "Go, Andrea, go!"

"I'm _so_ turned on right now," says Gabbie to no one in particular.

Andrea pulls away from the vampire's neck, struggling not to choke on the blood she just drank. "That's _gross,"_ she complains.

"One more," says Alison.

 _No!_ begs Andrea's stomach. _Don't make me!_

 _I have to,_ she tells it, and she takes another gulp, wincing as the disgusting mixture worms its way down her throat. If she survives this, she is going to wash her mouth out as _soon_ as she gets home.

"Suck it, girl," says DeStorm. "You suck it."

Jesse grins. "That is a _nasty_ hickey you gave him."

Finally, Andrea pulls away, and her suffering body thanks her for it. "I'm so sorry." She's not sure if she's apologizing to the vampire or herself. "Omigod. That is _scarring."_

"One more thing." Alison takes out an intricate black mask, covered in silver patterns. "You have to wear this mask so they don't recognize you." 

"She's a G," says DeStorm proudly.

"Oh, _God,"_ Andrea moans as Alison slips the mask over her face. She's doing this. She's _actually_ doing this. She's going to go undercover among the vampires, speak to Dorian, and try to "win his favor." If things go right, she'll earn the group's respect. But if things go wrong...

She's not going to consider the possibility of things going wrong.

"Honestly, that was a big moment," Joey remarks. "That says a lot about her."

Tyler nods in agreement. "Thank you, Andrea." He pronounces it "Awn-drea," and Andrea smiles despite herself.

 

Everyone gathers on the balcony overlooking the courtyard. The night air is cold against Alex's skin, and as he examines the sunstone in his hands, he's reminded of the warning in Dorian's journal. _Someone has to die for a gem,_ it said. _Be prepared._

He's _not_ prepared.

If there are eight gems, and each gem requires a life, that means...eight deaths? But there's ten of them! So only two will make it home? But...that's not fair...these guys are his _friends_...he doesn't want to lose them...

"Alex?"

"Mmm."

It's Alison. Her voice yanks him out of his frantic thoughts. "You'll need to shine the sunstone from right here," she tells him, gesturing to a specific spot on the edge of the balcony.

"Okay." He gets into position, sunstone at the ready. _First things first. Kill Dorian now. Figure out how to save everybody later._

"In order to kill my father," Alison continues, "we need to create a circle of salt. Once Andrea has gained his favor, she will lure him to the center of the circle. Then, Alex, you will shine the sunstone on him, rendering him unable to move. Finally, Joey will stab him in the chest with the stake."

"I'll make the circle," Gabbie volunteers.

"Okay!" says Liza in a suspiciously bright voice. "I'll help!"

Gabbie, Joey, Liza, Andrea, and Alison head down the stairs. Alex watches them go, his heart in his throat, hoping against hope that everything goes off without a hitch. The last thing he wants is to lose a friend to the vampires' fangs.

"Good luck!" shouts DeStorm.

 _Good luck,_ sighs Alex's soul.

 

"You got this," Joey reassures a shaking Andrea. "You smell like a vampire. You look great."

"Walk confidently and pray nothing goes wrong," is Alison's advice.

 _Oh, I'm praying, all right,_ thinks Andrea as she makes her way to the door. _I'm praying that I don't end up a bloodless husk of flesh._ The aftertaste of vampire blood still lingers in her mouth, and between that and the knot of apprehension in her stomach, she's pretty damn close to losing her lunch right now.

She enters the ballroom—and walks straight into what appears to be a vampire orgy.

Vampire couples surround her, kissing up and down each other's bodies without an ounce of shame. Many of them don't have much on. One woman in particular appears to be humping a couch, another waves a whip around and licks her lips suggestively, and a third dances around the room like she's at a vampire strip club. At the center of it all sits Dorian himself, sipping out of a skull-shaped goblet, clearly enjoying the show.

"Hey." An eerily familiar voice catches Andrea's attention. "I know you."

She turns around, and her blood runs cold. _Oh, God._ It's Vera. _She knows. She's going to blow my cover. Or worse—she's going to go ahead and eat me now._

But Vera does neither of those things. Instead, she looks Andrea up and down, and a blissful smile shines across her face. "You look _ravishing_ tonight," she purrs, breathing in her scent like it's a drug. (Andrea's immediately grateful for those disgusting gulps of blood.) She pulls her close. "Are you here with anyone?"

"No," Andrea lies, acutely aware of Vera's arm around her shoulder. "Not at all."

"Will you dance with me?"

At this point, Andrea's willing to do _anything_ to maintain her disguise, so she says "yeah" and allows Vera to lead her to the dance floor.

Vera's fingers lock themselves between Andrea's. "Your skin is so soft..."

 

"Make a circle," Liza hisses.

 _On it._ Gabbie's got the salt shaker, so she starts sprinkling the salt against the ground. _Let's kill this vampire bastard._

 

"Get comfortable," Vera hums, pushing Andrea onto a nearby couch.

Just when Andrea's starting to think that Vera's about to go all "orgy" on her, Dorian rises from his throne and launches into a speech. "Although our hearts are heavy with this evening's betrayals, we _will_ not abandon traditions." He beams at his guests, but there is no kindness in his smile. "It is a full moon. Time to see who will win the king's favor."

 

As Liza spreads the salt into a circle, she can hear a chorus of impatient voices shouting at her from the balcony.

"That's good!"

"Go! _Go!"_

"Don't run out!"

_I got this._

 

"I can be created in the present. You may always find me in the past. But the future can never make me. What am I?"

Silence reigns over the ballroom. Andrea waits a few seconds, wondering if anyone else will know the answer. No one does.

She raises her hand.

"Yes."

"History?"

"Hmm." The king comes down the stairs, turns, and approaches Andrea. "Well." He stares at her with beady blue eyes. "So quick to answer."

His face is unreadable, and not even Vera's encouraging smile can alleviate Andrea's anxiety. _Is this it?_ she frets. _Is he going to bite my neck open? Is this the end of my life?_

_Did Alison screw me over?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Well? Was it right? And what does this mean for our merry band of misfits? In a story like this, they can only starve off death for so long before one among them bites the dust...


	11. The Cost of Victory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our heroes discover that their actions have fatal consequences.

The salt ring is complete. Joey, Gabbie, and Liza scurry out of sight, while the other six YouTubers keep watch on the balcony. Tana's brain is overloading with a potent mixture of excitement and fear. _Come on, Andrea, you can do it, don't die,_ please _don't die..._

"I hope he doesn't see this salt ring," murmurs Alex.

"Guys." Joey's staring through the window with a dumbfounded look on his face. "There's an _actual_ orgy going on in there."

_"What?"_

"Yes."

Suddenly, Tana wishes that _she_ was down on the ground.

 

 _"That,"_ Dorian replies, "is correct."

 _Oh, thank God._ Andrea breathes a sigh of relief. _I did it. I'm safe. I'm not gonna die. Now all that's left is to lure Dorian to the circle, and then it's up to Joey to finish the job._

"You have won the king's favor for the evening." Dorian extends an arm to Andrea. She takes it, ignoring the crestfallen look on Vera's face. "Please, join me in my private quarters, where we can discuss more... _serious_ matters."

He speaks in a seductive purr, leaving Andrea to wonder exactly _how_ many vampires are going to flirt with her tonight. _Maybe it's a good thing Lauren didn't take this job,_ she chuckles to herself. _If these guys started hitting on_ her...

The image of a pissed-off Alex Wassabi punching Dorian in the face invades her mind. She laughs. Fortunately, Dorian doesn't seem to care.

 

"They're coming!" hisses Joey. "Hide!"

As Joey, Liza, and Gabbie scamper into their hiding places, Alex prepares to flash the vampire king. _This is it._ His heart beats a nervous pattern against his chest. _One dead vampire, coming right up._

Andrea and Dorian appear below them. She's slowly moving away from him, but he's too taken in by the moonlight to notice. "What a _lovely_ evening."

And with that, he absentmindedly wanders into the circle.

_"Now."_

Suddenly, Dorian notices the salt surrounding him. "What is _this?"_ He sounds befuddled, as if he hasn't quite processed his situation.

"Sunstone!" Alison screams.

That's Alex's cue. He shines the sunstone, trapping Dorian within its blinding light, and the vampire king freezes in place. "Joey!" Alex's palms are sweating like crazy, but he keeps his cool and focuses on his mission. "Joey!"

Whereupon Joey comes out of nowhere and stabs Dorian straight through the heart.

 _It's done,_ sighs Alex to himself as he watches Dorian fall. _He's dead. He can't hurt us anymore._

 

"Get the necklace!"

"Get it!"

Joey's head is still buzzing from the rush of his kill, but he pulls himself together and snatches the gem from Dorian's neck.

Everyone cheers. "You _better_ slay!" shouts Gabbie. Liza jumps up and down like a child in a candy store, while a still-masked Andrea grins from ear to ear. As Joey joins the three of them, a rush of hope overwhelms his thankful heart. _Maybe this party will be different. Maybe, just maybe, all ten of us will make it out alive._

"Watch your back!" warns Jesse from the balcony.

Joey, Liza, Gabbie, and Andrea whirl around. A woman—she can't be younger than sixty, but she still looks dangerously elegant—points a crossbow directly at their chests.

"Omigod!"

"Okay!"

"Who _is_ that?" Joey gasps, not sure if he wants to know the answer.

The woman scowls at the terrified YouTubers. "Where do you think _you're_ going?"

"Who is _you?"_ Liza demands to know.

Their attacker ignores her. "Call the others," she snaps, and a flood of vampires approach them from the ballroom. Gabbie clings to Liza, who stammers the word "um" over and over, while Andrea struggles to keep a stoic expression on her face. As for Joey, his happiness is gone, replaced by white-hot fear.

"Guys!" he shouts to their friends on the balcony. "We have a problem!"

But one look at the balcony reveals that the other YouTubers have problems of their own.

Vampires swarm them. One grabs Alex, wrenching the sunstone out of his grasp, as a suddenly frantic Lauren screams through her tears. Only the angry glare of the crossbow-wielding woman is enough to save the Novelist from being devoured right then and there.

Tana tries to escape the balcony, but another vampire forces her against the railing with the others. Jesse's drawn his gun, but no one seems to be paying any attention to it (or him). DeStorm's eyes are red with anger. And Tyler is hugging himself, shaking like a leaf, clearly on the verge of a breakdown.

 _I have to save them!_ Joey pushes Liza, Andrea, and Gabbie behind him, the bloody stake still in his trembling hands. "Guys." His voice is breathless. "Stay behind me. I have the stick." _I_ can't _let them die like this! Not now! Not after everything!_

"I don't know who _any_ of you are, and frankly, I don't care," the woman _(the queen of vampires, maybe?)_ sneers. Then, to her bloodthirsty underlings, "Kill them all!"

 _Oh, God. Oh, God._ Panic grips Joey's system. _It's too late to save the others...I can't get up to the balcony in time...but at least I can protect Gabbie, Liza, and Andrea. I've got this stake. I'll go down fighting._ Images of long-dead friends clog his brain, and he bites backs tears. _Maybe my death will give them enough time to get out of here..._

"No!" Alison's voice rings out over the snarling crowd. "Wait!" She throws herself in front of the crossbow. "Mother, these are my _friends!"_

"I'm sure your _friends_ are going to taste delicious," is her mother's cold reply.

But Alison does not back down. _"No,"_ she spits, her tone the epitome of tranquil fury. "Father was killed in the proper way. I _demand_ you honor vampire law." Her hands curl into fists. "A life for a life."

"My _God,_ but you're stubborn," sighs the queen. "Very well, then! A life for a life! Which one of your _friends_ are you going to send to their death?"

 _So it's true._ Joey's spirits sag. _We're doing this again. We're going to have to choose someone to die._

_Just like last time._

_I'm sorry...I'm_ so _sorry..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: For the first time, the ten YouTubers must choose two to face their doom. But who will they choose? Also, the concept of usefulness is thrown around a lot.


	12. How to Kill a YouTuber

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the first vote of the game! Who's it gonna be? Who's it gonna be?!?

"We'll vote privately on two that will run the race for the golden goblet," Alison explains in even tones. "The winner will survive, and the loser will be the life you take."

With that, she heads inside, and the ten YouTubers have no choice but to follow her to the lounge—and to their fate.

Now, if "a life for a life" is the law of the vampires, DeStorm's okay with that, because that's the law of the streets. All he has to do is make sure that _his_ life stays out of this.

"Let me just say, first off," says Andrea once everyone sits down, _"he_ got the key." She points at DeStorm. "Never explained it. The key opened up a notebook that had—"

 _"And_ he tried to pin it on Joey!" Gabbie exclaims.

DeStorm takes a deep breath, fighting to maintain his I-don't-care persona. "'Scuse me." _It's fine. I'm fine. They need me._ "The key is what helped us get that gem right there."

"But how did you _get_ it?"

"It's shady that you have the key," Tyler pipes up, "and we wouldn't have _needed_ it had we not been here in the _first_ place."

He gestures to Joey as he says that, and the Savant's face turns purple. DeStorm almost laughs. Almost.

Lauren nods in agreement. "Your name was on the invitation, and we wouldn't be in this situation if it weren't for you."

"How can we _trust_ you?" Tyler demands to know.

"Okay!" Joey looks like a well-dressed pimple that's about to pop. "Let me invite you to my party, and then, all of a sudden, let me chain myself up and be all kinky and stuff! _No!_ That's not me!"

"It's _me,"_ chuckles Gabbie.

"I'm sweet!" Joey insists. "I'm a sweet boy!"

 _Are you?_ To be honest, DeStorm doesn't give a shit. As long as _he_ doesn't get voted in to run for a goddamn goblet, everyone else can do whatever the hell they feel like doing. _He_ doesn't care. He's here for the party. He's _not_ here for _this._

 

After watching Joey take down a vampire king without breaking a sweat, Tyler isn't sure whether to praise him or to fear him. _Something's wrong._ Sure, he says he didn't invite them, and Tyler believes him, but _why_ in the _world_ did he allow a sorceress to invite them in his name? _Especially_ after what happened last year?

_Eleven missing YouTubers, last seen heading to a Joey Graceffa party. Three were found alive. The other eight..._

Tyler suppresses a year's worth of tribute videos and VidCon memorials, chokes back the ever-present threat of _you're next, Tyler, you're gonna die here,_ and calls Liza and Andrea over to his couch. "Let's talk."

The three of them sit together, and Tyler tries not to think about the fact that they're about to kill someone.

"Who hasn't done _anything?"_

 

As Joey joins Gabbie and Tana in the center of the room, he's already made his choice. "Lauren hasn't..."

"She's _right_ there," Gabbie points out.

Joey turns. Sure enough, Lauren and Alex stand in front of them. Alex's arm is wrapped protectively around his girlfriend's abdomen, and he's glaring at Joey with a look of pure betrayal on his face. "Hey," Joey squeaks. _It's not you, Alex. You're fine. You've been a big help. But Lauren...she hasn't done enough...I hope you understand..._

Lauren's eyes flash with anger. "So you'd like to kill me off!"

"I don't want to kill _anyone,_ Lauren!" retorts a clearly annoyed Gabbie, staring the blonde down like a predator examining its prey.

"We just think that you should fight for your life," Joey insists. "That's it."

Lauren Riihimaki, as nice as she may be, is the weakest member of the group right now. It's time for her to prove that she belongs here.

 

Alex can't believe what he's hearing. Lauren? They're voting for Lauren? Ten people, two unlucky souls, and they want to get rid of _Lauren?!?_ This is getting out of control!

"Let's leave this group," he growls between gritted teeth, tugging Lauren away from their stares. "They're obviously against you."

"I believe in you!" Tana calls after them. "I think you have a good heart!"

_She's not going in there._

_It won't happen._

_I won't let it._

 

As soon as she realizes that she's being targeted, Lauren goes on the defensive.

"I think I'm being victimized," she pleads. "I've been cooperative. I haven't done anything wrong, whereas DeStorm has had _so_ many shady things happen to him." She masks her fear with exasperation. "And _I'm_ somehow put on the same level as _him?"_

Gabbie shakes her head. "You didn't do anything _wrong,_ but you didn't do anything _right._ And you had an opportunity to step up and help the team, and you—"

"Because I didn't think I would be strong enough for the challenge and have someone on our team killed!"

"Oop," says Tyler.

Lauren's shaking. So because she said she didn't want to be the group's vampire spy, that somehow translates to _"she's useless, let's send her to her death?"_ No! She's done things! She doesn't deserve this! Why is everybody ganging up on her? "We didn't know what we were getting into!"

"She gave us the answer," Andrea remarks.

 _Yeah, well, I don't work well under pressure! I probably would've screwed it up somehow!_ "Then why didn't _you_ volunteer?" Lauren snaps in Gabbie's direction.

Gabbie shrugs. "I did the salt."

"Yeah, that was some good salting." Lauren's voice has devolved into a combination of sarcasm and bitterness. _"Good_ salting."

"Thank you."

This is a _party._ Lauren came here to have fun with her friends, and now it's become a legitimate horror movie where people are getting killed. On top of that, her so-called "friends" are turning against her, so apparently she can't trust _anyone_ anymore.

"Okay, last thing." Alex hasn't said anything in a while, but now, he speaks with quiet determination. "If you're gonna vote Lauren, please vote for me instead. I'd rather do the challenge than let her go through it."

 _No!_ Not him! That's just as bad as getting voted in herself (if not worse)! _Please, no, don't pick Alex, don't pick me, just pick DeStorm and Joey, leave us alone...please...let us live..._

 

"Let's just vote," says Joey, and Gabbie couldn't agree more.

"Voting is simple," Alison explains, revealing ten stacks of tarot cards to the group. "One by one, you'll pick the card for the person you'd like to vote into the challenge. I will then shuffle and draw two. The two names that are drawn will go down to find the golden goblet."

The voting begins. Lauren votes first, then Tana, and before long, Gabbie finds herself staring at the weirdest cards she's ever seen in her life. Why does her Vaudevillian card make her look like some sort of skeleton zombie? And when did Alison have time to _make_ all these? _Did she know—_

 _Forget it._ She chooses an Engineer card, hands it to Alison, and sashays back to her seat.

 

Joey. Alex. DeStorm. Andrea. Liza. Tyler.

At last, it's Jesse's turn.

 _Hmmm._ His eyes travel up and down the rows of cards, not bothering to pay attention to their designs, as he mulls over his potential voting options. Out of everyone who's been suggested, the only choice that makes sense to him is Lauren. Joey was right. She hasn't done shit. She should...she should...

_"Vote for me instead."_

"Wish granted, Wassabi," he mutters to himself, grabbing a Novelist card from the appropriate pile.

 

"Everyone has cast their vote?" Alison asks.

They have.

The time has come.

To be honest, things aren't looking good for Lauren, especially considering how much Joey bad-talked her to everybody. And as she watches Alison shuffle the cards, fear overwhelms her spirit.

_What if...?_

Alex squeezes her hand. It doesn't make her feel any better.

Alison draws a card, examines it, takes a deep breath, and reveals it to the group.

"Lauren."

Alex sighs and slumps over in his seat, his hand still clenched in Lauren's. As for Lauren herself, she buries her face in her free hand, unable to comprehend what they've just done to her. _Why?_ screams the sliver of her mind that hasn't been hijacked by panic. _Why me? Why is this happening? Why do they want me gone? Why can't we all just have a nice party? Why why why why why?_

Her head hurts. So does her heart.

 

The second card is drawn.

"DeStorm."

On the outside, DeStorm is the picture of calm acceptance. "Okay," he says with a smile, his hands in his pockets, his head held high.

On the inside, though, he's a complete and utter mess. He came _all_ this way, did _all_ this work, gave _everything_ he had to these people, and now they're trying to throw him away? They _need_ him. He thought they knew that, but...

Screw them. Screw them all. He's gonna survive, and there's nothing any of them can do about it.

 _God,_ he's so scared...

 

"If you two would follow me," says Alison to Lauren and DeStorm. "Everyone else can stay."

Alex can't breathe. As soon as Lauren's hand slips out of his grasp, terror and trepidation trap his lungs in their iron grip. _Oh God they chose Lauren they chose Lauren what if she dies what if I never see her again what if she doesn't come back—_

No. She'll come back. Of _course_ she'll come back. She's _gonna_ survive this.

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Lauren and DeStorm must participate in the race for the golden goblet. One will succeed. The other will suffer a grisly fate. No matter who dies, the Victorian death game has officially begun.


	13. The Golden Goblet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DeStorm and Lauren must face off against vampires, dragons, and other scary things. Only one will come out of this alive.

_"You didn't do anything_ wrong, _but you didn't do anything_ right."

_"You had an opportunity to step up, and you blew it."_

_"You're useless."_

_"You're worthless."_

Lauren bites back a scream. Tears prick at her brown eyes, and it takes everything inside her to keep them from flowing. _Is this it?_ frets her broken spirit. _Is this the end of my life? Am I_ really _going to die here?_

 _Am I_ that _expendable?_

 

As he and Lauren follow Alison to Vampire Central, one thought echoes through DeStorm's frazzled mind: _I_ ain't _going down without a fight._

He walks into the ballroom. The walls are lined with vampires, and they're staring at him like he's their next meal. DeStorm's about to ask why they can't just get themselves some Postmates and leave him alone, but then he realizes that he should probably keep his damn mouth shut.

"Each one of you must unravel three clues to find the location of the golden goblet," says the vampire queen in a slow, cruel voice. "Take your starting place."

One of the vampires leads DeStorm to his "starting place," while another does the same for Lauren. DeStorm takes the opportunity to size up his opponent. She's a _wimp._ He'll beat her easily.

"And don't take too long," the queen continues, "otherwise we'll have to kill you both." Her ugly face bursts into a shit-eating grin. "And wouldn't _that_ be a shame!"

 _Screw you._ DeStorm's middle finger itches to flip her off. _You can't break me. I'm gonna win this. This is_ not _where I die._

"Begin!"

 

 _I'll survive,_ Lauren tells herself. _I'll come back with the goblet, and then no one will call me useless ever,_ ever _again._

She reads the first clue.

_In the center of three celestial points, silver waits._

"Three celestial points." There's a star on the floor, and another one on a nearby door, but the third one is a _lot_ harder to spot. "One...two..." She's got this. She's got this. It _has_ to be here _somewhere._

"Three."

A star shines at her from a vampire's blue jacket.

She smiles. _"You_ have a star," she says to the blue-jacketed vampire. His expression reminds her of a wolf about to pounce on a wounded fawn, so she decides to leave him alone and focus on the clue.

On the other side of the ballroom, DeStorm stares incredulously at another vampire's coat. "He got a star on his chest!" he gasps. "I don't see no damn silver, though..."

At the center of Lauren's stars, a table waits for her, covered with a sheet the color of milk. She pulls the sheet away...and immediately starts screaming.

_Snakes._

To quote Indiana Jones, _why_ did it _have_ to be _snakes?!?_

And not just _any_ snakes—red ones, with black-and-white stripes across their disgusting bodies. Are they poisonous? She doesn't know. She doesn't _want_ to know. She _hates_ snakes. She can't handle this. She just wants out of here.

 _Oh, come_ on, _Lauren. Pull yourself together. You_ can't _have a breakdown now. Not if you ever want to see Alex again._

 

"You know," says Gabbie to the rest of the group, "now that I'm really thinking about it, maybe Lauren's intention of not doing the challenge was because she didn't know if she was physically able to do it."

Tana nods. Regret invades her heart. "Honestly, at the end of the day, Lauren's not, like, sketchy. She's not talking down to us."

"This would've been a good conversation to have earlier," is Alex's bitter response.

 

DeStorm finishes the star nonsense, and he moves on to the snake pit. _"Hell_ no." He's afraid. But he's not screaming. Railroad Tycoons don't scream. Railroad Tycoons keep their cool, no matter what happens.

Instead, he reaches into the pit and takes out a bundle of silver coins.

"All right." He frowns. "I got some silver." There's a note wrapped around the coins. "A letter..." He untangles it, smooths it out against his palm, and reads it to himself.

_I died in battle and need to pay the ferryman to carry me to my eternal rest. Can you please find my coffin, which is marked by the sign of my faith?_

Lauren's still freaking out over the snakes, which gives DeStorm an opening to take the lead. "Sign of my faith. Okay." It doesn't take long for him to find what he's looking for. "Here's a cross." Underneath said cross is a coffin, tucked into some sort of weird compartment, and DeStorm wastes no time in pulling it out into the open.

"Okay!" squeaks Lauren, who seems to have _finally_ gotten over the snake thing. "I got one!" She holds up a wad of coins identical to DeStorm's.

"All right!" DeStorm shouts back. "I found a damn coffin!"

Little Lauren looks like a lost puppy in her too-big yellow skirts, and for a few moments, DeStorm feels guilty about what his win will do to her. But he drums the words _it's her or me_ into his frightened brain, and his guilt gives way to cold determination.

_I won't lose._

__

__

_I_ can't _lose._

_This girl is going to die._

 

By now, Lauren is pretty much just following DeStorm's lead. She runs to the crosses, pulls out the other coffin, and examines it for clues. "Is there a lock?" Rows of numbers stare back at her. "What does this mean?"

As it turns out, there _are_ locks on the coffins, and DeStorm's already found his. "I gotta figure out the combination for this lock," he mutters. "What? Okay...so _now_ I gotta figure out these daggone equations."

 _The equations._ Of course. Three math problems are etched into the coffin's lid. Lauren bites her lip, reminds herself that she's good at math, and gets to work on the first one. "Three times five is fifteen...minus six...equals nine..."

"How did they get _this?"_ DeStorm asks loudly. "Okay, so six times four is twenty-four...twenty-four minus ten make fourteen! Got it!" His brash voice temporarily overpowers Lauren's thought process. "Five times seven is thirty-five, minus five is thirty. Five times seven...so that's seven..."

 _Ignore him. Focus on your work. Remember, it's him or you, and_ he's _the one who's been acting sketchy this whole time._ "Seven times two is fourteen, minus eight is six. This is two!" _One down. Two to go._

But with the threat of a grisly death still looming over her head, the numbers blur together, making it impossible for her to concentrate. Vampire laughter rings in her ears. Her brain is overwhelmed with waves of red-hot hysteria.

DeStorm isn't helping. "Five times _what_ will make—"

"DeStorm, I can't think!"

"I'm trying to figure mine out!" he shouts back, and it occurs to her that he doesn't give a damn about her concentration. Of _course_ he doesn't. He wants to live. She shouldn't expect anything less from him, just like _he_ shouldn't expect anything from _her._

She takes a deep breath, stares at the equations, and tries to regain her focus. _Live,_ her mind whispers in a last-ditch attempt to convince herself that she'll be fine. _I'm going to live. I_ won't _die in a place like this._

 

"So two times nine is eighteen...eighteen minus _what_ equals four?" The answer hits DeStorm like a shot. "Fourteen!"

He puts the numbers seven, one, and four into the combination, his hands shaking like crazy as he does it. _I ain't dying. I'm gonna beat this girl. I just gotta...come on, be right, be right...._

It's right.

DeStorm takes a second to allow himself to breathe, then swings open the unlocked coffin. "Holy shit." He's greeted with a grinning skull. "I gotta pay this mother..."

Lauren gasps, then gets back to work on her _own_ combination.

As DeStorm feeds the silver coins into a dead man's eyeballs, a part of him's convinced that this is just a crazy dream—that he fell asleep in the carriage on the way to Joey's place, and now his brain is having itself a supernatural nightmare. Vampires? Sorceresses? Skulls? This _can't_ be real. It's just his mind playing tricks on him. He's gonna be okay.

Once he's paid the skull, a vampire in green rewards him with the third clue.

_Take my sword, and slay the dragon who took my life._

A dragon. A _damn_ dragon. Okay. Now DeStorm _knows_ he's dreaming. This challenge is too crazy to be real.

 

Lauren's solved all three equations. They're right. She _knows_ they are. So why isn't the combination working?

_What did I do wrong?_

Alex's goofy grin flashes across her desperate mind, and she bangs against the side of the coffin with all the strength she can muster. _No._ She _won't_ die here. She _won't_ fall prey to these horrible vampire people. Alex is waiting for her. She _has_ to live.

 

DeStorm unsheathes a silver sword, hides his fear behind a mask of cool, and approaches the stone dragon in the center of the ballroom. "If y'all come over here," he warns the vampires, "I'm gonna slay _your_ asses, too!"

And with that, he sticks his sword into the dragon.

"Aaah!"

Underneath the now-slain dragon, a drawer pops open. There's a note inside.

_The golden goblet is beside the queen's throne. Present this to her._

_I did it._ DeStorm approaches the throne. The vampires hiss, but all he has to do is shout _"Chill,_ bro!" to get them to shut up. _I'm not dying. I'm gonna get the golden goblet. And it's gold? Pssh. Add that to my collection._

He gives the note to the queen. She reaches into her chest, pulls out the golden goblet, and hands it to a _very_ relieved Railroad Tycoon.

"I'm sorry, girl," says DeStorm to Lauren, who's still struggling to open the coffin, "but I got this golden goblet." He hugs it to his chest, savoring the feeling of being alive. "I ain't dying today."

 

Lauren's mind is unable to process her current situation. _I came here for a party,_ she reminds herself. _A_ party. _And now, here I am, about to be eaten by vampires, because apparently that's what happens around here._

_Why? Why me? I just want to go home..._

"Now that we've got that _finally_ over and done with," snaps the queen, "can we _please_ kill the other one?"

A thousand vampires swarm Lauren like a herd of stampeding cattle. She screams, but the first several bites kill her cries dead in her throat, and pain assaults her already broken system.

 _Alex..._ She's too tired to resist. She can already feel herself fading. _I'm sorry...I tried...but it's up to you now, all right? Run. Get away. I love you._

After God knows how long, the pain shudders to a stop, and her tear-soaked eyelids close.

_Don't...die...Alex..._

 

"Yeah! Kill her!" The words leave DeStorm's mouth before he has a chance to realize what he's saying. _"Kill her!"_

Alison whisks him away—away from the death he avoided, away from the sight of hundreds of vampires feasting on Lauren Riihimaki, away from the sickening smile of the vampire queen. Somehow, he manages to keep his trembling hands clenched around the golden goblet.

The guilt returns.

 _Forget it,_ he tells himself. _She's dead. Screw her. She deserved it._ You're _still here, and that's all that matters._

But try as he might, her screams still echo throughout his troubled mind, and something inside his stony heart grows cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Lauren. You were a sweet girl with a good heart, but the innocent ones _never_ make it out alive.  
>  Next chapter: His name is Alex Wassabi. You killed his girlfriend. Prepare to die. Also, Tana regrets everything, Tyler tries to be the voice of reason, and Alison continues to be shady.


	14. In This Life or the Next

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lauren has died. Now comes the hard part: breaking the news to a certain Novelist...

Footsteps. Liza straightens up in her seat. "They're coming," she squeaks, her palms sweaty from the stress of the situation. "This is it." Maybe it was all a lie. Maybe DeStorm and Lauren are _both_ gonna show up in one piece. Maybe there's still a way for them to live.

She crosses her fingers behind her back, gulps down a breath, and prays.

Alison reenters the parlor. DeStorm is right behind her, a scowl scarring his otherwise proud face, a golden goblet in his right hand. As for the yellow-clad Engineer, she's nowhere to be seen.

"Omigod!" Gabbie gasps. "Is Lauren dead?"

"I tried to help her as much as I could," is DeStorm's blunt reply.

 _So it's true._ The realization hits Liza like a brick to the face. _People are dying. Lauren died. She's dead. We're never gonna see her again. Alex doesn't have a girlfriend anymore._

All she can do is thank her lucky stars that David isn't here.

 

_No._

It's not true. It's a lie. She _can't_ be dead. The words "dead" and "Lauren" don't go together. She's gonna come back. She's gonna walk through that _god_ damn door, her head held high, that adorable Lauren expression shining on her face...

"What is that for?" asks Joey, pointing to the goblet in DeStorm's hand. "Why do you have that?"

"I have no idea," DeStorm replies.

It doesn't matter. None of it matters. "What happened to Lauren?"

"All of the damn vampires attacked her," explains DeStorm, "and I couldn't save her."

The world goes dark. Every part of Alex's body burns with an agony unlike anything he's ever known. He can't think of anything beyond _not Lauren not my Lauren don't be dead don't be dead don't_...and yet, the awful truth has already slipped through the cracks in his heart. _Oh, no. Oh, God._ It hurts to breathe. He feels like he's suffocating. _Lauren,_ please, _come back, don't leave me, I can't do this alone..._

Tears flood his cheeks.

DeStorm's still talking, and his voice is like salt in Alex's wounds. "So that's when we dipped up out of there. _Real_ quick."

It's like someone has flipped a switch. Grief transforms into rage, and Alex pushes himself into a standing position. "All I heard was you killed Lauren!" he sob-shouts at DeStorm.

"I didn't kill her!" DeStorm looks taken aback by this outburst. "Whaddya mean?"

 _You did. You killed her. And so did Joey, Gabbie, and everyone else who voted her into that challenge. If it hadn't been for you_ monsters, _Lauren would still be alive._ "It's your fault!" He points a shaking finger at his so-called friends. "You did this!"

"I honestly regret it," sighs Tana. "I feel like I made a mistake."

Alex sinks back into his seat, memories of Lauren shoving their way to the forefront of his mind. Her smile. Her laugh. Her tendency to invade his side of the bed. Even those stupid stuffies of hers—Bear Bear, Duck (who isn't a duck), Baby Dino (who nobody likes), and all the rest—haunt him.

"If we want to get out of this, we need to work together," says Tyler quietly.

While Alex appreciates Tyler's attempt at bringing the group together, it's too late for that now. "I'm not working with _anyone!"_ He has no friends. It's him against all of them. They are going to _pay_ for what they've done.

Starting with DeStorm.

 

A part of DeStorm was hoping that they'd be happy to see him alive. But then, Alex starts crying his little baby tears, and everyone else glares at DeStorm as if he single-handedly caused the goddamn apocalypse.

It boils his blood. "Don't look at _me,"_ he snaps. "I _told_ you not to pick me."

"Stop being so defensive!" Tana cries.

 _So you all hate me because I lived and Lauren died, huh? Is_ that _what this is about? I suppose I should've been all "oh, no, Lauren, you can live, I'll sacrifice my own damn self, because I don't wanna make your boyfriend cry?!?"_

_Well, excuse me for living! Excuse me for fighting to see my kid again! I'll bet a thousand bucks that any one of you assholes would've done the exact same thing!_

 

Losing Lauren is bad enough, but watching Alex cry for her is _really_ taking a toll on Tyler's heart. _We're murderers now,_ he realizes. _Alex's right. We killed Lauren. And, by extension, we killed Alex as well._

Yes, he didn't vote for her (he voted for DeStorm), but he should've said something he should've stopped them he _should've_ —

Joey frowns. "What are we gonna do next?"

"We have to find seven more of those," says Liza, pointing to the gem they got from Dorian, "in exchange for seven lives."

"That's the _only_ way?" Andrea groans.

Tyler nods. "I'm in." Of _course_ he's in. He doesn't have a choice.

"Okay," says Joey.

Alison heads for the fireplace. "There's something I need to show you."

 _There's_ always _something new you need to show us,_ Tyler sighs, his head a mess of grief and irritation. _If you_ know _these things,_ tell _us these things._

The vampire princess retrieves what appears to be a giant stone semicircle, causing several people to ask "What is that?" at once. The thing has eight gem-shaped holes in it, each with a tiny token above its point, and it's giving off a half-clock vibe to Tyler.

"This," Alison explains, "is the gem map." She places it on the table. "In each of these places belongs a gem. Each token represents one of the lieutenants that hold one of the gems."

Joey holds up the one gem they _do_ have. "Should I put it in?"

"Put it in," their guide replies.

So Joey puts the gem into the first hole, which is marked by a small vampire bat, while the other eight survivors look on. "Careful, Joey," Tyler murmurs. "We don't know what this does."

And then, seconds after the gem is placed, thunder clashes, and a cloud of white smoke appears in the doorway.

Everyone screams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Things go from bad to worse. Also, the group meets the Sorceress.


	15. What A Tangled Web We Weave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One gem down. Seven to go. But our nine surviving heroes _might_ be in over their heads...

From the smoke and purple storm, a woman emerges, and Andrea immediately recognizes her from the painting in the lounge. _Omigod._ Her heart almost stops. _This is—she has to be—_

"Did you _really_ think you could escape my grasp?" the Sorceress sneers in a booming voice. "You're just the pre-show for tonight's _true_ extravaganza...of _blood_ and _suffering!"_

Tyler gulps. Gabbie bites her lip. Alex scowls through his tears. Jesse has his hand on his gun again, as if _that's_ going to do them any good against an all-powerful Sorceress. As for Andrea, she struggles to stay stoic, but she's never been more scared in her life.

The Sorceress grins at their obvious fear. "None of you are leaving this place _alive!"_

She points her staff at the door to their right, and in comes...in comes...

"Omigod!"

It's a spider. It's a woman. It's some unholy combination of the two, with eight red eyes, eight spindly legs, tanned skin, sharp fangs, and a gruesome smile. It (she?) hisses at the YouTubers, and chills runs down Andrea's spine. She _hates_ spiders. They're disgusting. They're her biggest fear in the world. And spider women are, if _this_ one is anything to go by, even worse.

The spider woman charges at them. Andrea runs for cover, almost tripping over Tana's dress in her efforts to escape the monster's fangs.

And then...a scream splits the air.

Andrea whirls around just in time to see the spider drag a struggling Alex through the door. Before anyone has a chance to save him, the door slams shut, and his cries for help fade into silent nothingness.

Andrea shouts the first thing that comes to mind. "What the hell was _that?"_

The Sorceress disappears into the cloud of smoke from whence she came, leaving the other eight survivors in a state of mind-numbing fear. Andrea, especially, is freaking out. _Is Alex going to die? Is the spider woman going to come back? What if_ I _get dragged away next?_

_Oh God oh God oh God..._

 

Alex fights the monster's grasp like a fly trying to escape a spiderweb, but his efforts prove futile, and he finds himself pinned against a desk in the library. _This is it,_ he realizes. _This is where I die._

Frankly, after Lauren, the thought of death isn't as scary as it used to be.

"Y-you're not gonna get away with this," he stammers at his captor. "My friends..." _Huh. I just called them my friends. I guess I haven't given up on them after all._ "They're gonna avenge my death. They killed a vampire. They'll kill you too."

She smiles (if you can call it that; it's more of a toothy smirk than anything else). "Aren't _you_ sweet."

Before Alex can muster up enough courage to reply, she stabs a needle into the side of his neck. He cries out, but the sensation isn't as painful as he thought it was going to be—it feels like getting a shot at the doctor's office.

"Just do it..." he moans involuntarily as his world begins to spin. "...make it quick...please..."

The spider shakes her head. "You're not ready yet."

Whatever chemicals were in that injection prove too strong for Alex's body to resist. He sinks into unconsciousness, where Lauren waits for him.

 

"What _was_ that?" Tyler demands to know.

 _Hell if_ I _know,_ is Gabbie's disgruntled response. So let's see: first they lost Lauren to the vampires, then they got told by some sorceress bitch that they're all going to die, then they got attacked by a freakin' _spider_ of all things, and now poor Alex has been carted off to God-knows-where. This party is shaping up to be the worst one ever thrown.

Joey narrows his eyes. "That was definitely a spider...woman..."

"How are we getting out?" Liza asks.

They try the door that Alex was whisked through, but it's locked. "We are trapped," says Tyler with a sigh.

 _Trapped._ Dammit. So they're stuck in here. Alex could be dying _right now,_ and they're completely powerless to save him. The weaker part of Gabbie wants to curl up on the nearest couch and cry.

But that's before Tana comes through with an observation that just might salvage this hopeless situation. "What is this box?" She shakes a reddish-white box that, until now, was sitting unattended on a table. "Come here! Look at this!"

_Break the seal and pour._

Tana looks confused. "Break seal and pour _what?"_

"Something that fits in here," Andrea replies, pointing to the openings on the box's lid.

Joey looks around the room. "It's probably a wine glass or something," he remarks, and that's when they notice a bunch of wine bottles sitting on another table. _That's weird,_ thinks Gabbie to herself. _I don't remember_ those _being there before._

"Wait!" Andrea exclaims. "Try the corks!"

Tyler seconds her idea. "The corks! Maybe..."

"Oh, smart." Joey begins to take the corks off the bottles. "Let's try it."

Gabbie hopes that they'll be able to drink the wine once they're done. The glass of alcohol she had earlier has long since worn off, and she could _really_ use a drink right now.

 

It's clear that none of these idiots know what they're doing. They're lost. They're _always_ lost without DeStorm. And to think that they wanted to get rid of him? _As if._

The golden goblet is still clenched in his grasp, so he examines it. _Wait._ Does it have special powers? "Yeah," he mutters, running a finger along the inscription in its base. "This is the seal."

Everyone crowds around him. DeStorm, who's grateful for the temporary rush of positive attention, opens up the bottom of the goblet. Inside is a tiny bottle.

DeStorm smiles. "We broke the seal."

"Oh!" Liza cries. "A shot!"

Tana, being the clueless airhead that she is, chants "Shot, shot, shot, shot!" as if this is a goddamn rave. DeStorm has half a mind to scream at her that _this is a_ death _game, Mongeau, what the_ hell _is your problem?_

There's a note with the bottle. "What does it say?" Joey asks.

Gabbie reads it.

_Jorogumo liked to liquor up her boy toys with four shots before taking them to bed for the final time._

"Sounds like me," jokes Tana.

 _Who's Jorogumo?_ is DeStorm's reaction. _Is Jorogumo hot?_

 

Liza feels like she's about to throw up. Jorogumo...that's the spider lady, right? The one who was just in here a minute ago? Is Alex a "boy toy" that she's about to liquor up, take to bed, and kill?

Nah. Alex would _never_ agree to that, especially not after the Lauren thing. Unless...

You know what? Forget it. She's _not_ going to think about what Kooky Spider Lady may or may not be doing to her friend. Instead, she's going to be a good Explorer, find the other three bottles, and (hopefully) save him before it's too late.

The gang searches the room for the bottles. Liza, being the tiny girl that she is, is able to search high and low with ease. Pretty soon, she finds the second bottle under one of the couch cushions. "Explorer found the second bottle already!" she crows.

"Stop finding things!" shrieks Joey.

"I'm an Explorer!" she shoots back at him. "I can't help it!" Then, to the others, "Okay! Two more! We need two more bottles!"

"Wait." Joey squints at a cabinet. "Is that..." Suddenly, he springs to life, snatching the third bottle from its hiding place with all the energy of a puppy on a sugar rush. "I found it! I found it!"

Liza gasps and pats Joey on the back, her heart bursting with pride. "My boy!"

 

After they find all four shots, Joey finds a tray of liquor. There's a note attached to the tray, and since Gabbie seems to have placed herself on note-reading duty for the time being, she reads it.

_Drink up, but chose wisely...or your first one will be your last._

Joey frowns. One of them has to drink four of these shots, and they're going to have to drink them in the correct order. If they get it wrong... _"your first one will be your last"_...poison. A mistake means poison.

Shane Dawson's face flashes across his mind, followed closely by Matt Haag's broken expression.

"I betcha there might be a symbol at the bottom of the shot," says Jesse. "Does that make sense?"

"Drink up," Tana echoes, "but chose wisely, or your first one will be your last." She sounds like she's reading out a coroner's report.

The words "I'll do it" pop out of Joey's mouth automatically. This is it. This is his chance to show the group that he's more than just the guy who invited them into this nightmare. He's actually _in_ this. He wants to help everyone get out of here alive.

"Okay," says Liza.

"Are you sure you wanna do it?" Tana asks.

Joey nods, staring at the tray of shot glasses, his heart picking up its pace. "I'll do it."

The shots are all different colors. Four of them are the same color as the liquids in the four bottles they retrieved, so they match up the vials with the shots. "This is it," Andrea breathes. "These are our four."

"Okay, Joey," Tyler squeaks. "It's your turn. Have a drink."

If Joey gets this right, he'll win the group's respect, and they won't vote him into any challenges. But if he gets this wrong...

_At least I'll see my friends again._

 

"That means she's gonna take you away, though!" Tana realizes aloud. "She likes to liquor up her boys with four shots!" An image of Joey being dragged off by Jorogumo invades her mind, and she shudders at the thought of losing yet another friend.

"I'll go," he insists. "I'll save Alex."

"No!" She tries to take the glass from him. "Let's split it!" _If I drink the shots, Jorogumo won't take me. She doesn't take girls. And if we split them, Joey won't have enough liquor in him for her tastes._ "We can _all_ do it! I'll go with you!"

He pushes her hand away. "It _has_ to be a boy, and I volunteer."

"It has to be a guy," says DeStorm in a surprisingly gentle voice. "Let him drink it. Go on. Go for it."

Tana's heart hurts. There's no way out, is there? Joey's going to drink these shots, and then Jorogumo's going to take him, and then...and then...

She's trying not to cry.

 

Joey drinks the shots. They taste like mud mixed with urine, and he winces as they slide down his throat. But, much to his relief, he isn't poisoned.

"I feel okay," he tells the group.

_Hold on, Alex. Stay alive. We're coming._

 

Tyler feels a momentary rush of joy that Joey got the shots right, but his happiness is overwhelmed with fear for Alex's safety. _What if it's too late?_ sobs his conscience. _What if he's already dead?_

He blinks back the tears that are threatening to leave his waterlogged eyes, takes a deep breath, and turns his attention to the shot glasses—or, more specifically, the symbols on the shot glasses. "I've seen these symbols before." He speaks in a rush of frightened comprehension. "They're on the box. They match."

They return to the box. Sure enough, the symbols are the same.

"Boom," says Jesse as he lines up the shot glasses. "Boom, boom, and boom." He surveys his handiwork with a shrug, then turns his attention to the still-full bottles. "All right. So pour each of these into those."

One by one, the liquids are poured into the holes on the box, and Tyler waits with bated breath for something to happen (because, usually, things happen when they figure out a riddle). Once the last hole has been filled, the box glows purple and opens.

Everyone gasps.

 

Inside the box is a strange sort of jewel, which Joey examines. "Does it open up?" he wonders aloud.

"Look!" Liza points to the symbol on the jewel. "That's the same...the same symbol..." She points frantically to the door that Alex was kidnapped through. _This is it. We're almost there. I hope we're not too late._

The group gets the message. Tyler sticks the jewel onto the door, which pops open almost instantly. He does his little Tyler Scream and jumps away.

Gabbie peeks into the next room. "There's a guy on the table!" she reports, her voice a high-pitched cry of disbelief. "It's Alex!"

_"Alex?"_

Everyone charges into the library. As soon as Liza steps inside, she sees a massive tampon lying unattended on a desk. Upon closer inspection, the tampon turns out to be Alex, wrapped in a cocoon of spider silk, a weirdly peaceful expression on his face.

Andrea frowns. "Is _that_ Alex?"

"It's Alex," Joey confirms.

Gabbie's pretty much hysterical. "He's in a _spiderweb!"_

 _Oh,_ Liza snarks to herself. _I see what happened here. Jorogumo must've realized "hey, Lauren died, Alex is single, let me just go shoot some web on him!" Ya nasty!_

 

Jesse's done.

He _tried_ to help. He _tried_ to protect everyone. He even voted for Alex instead of Lauren, because that's what Alex wanted. And now...Lauren is dead, Alex is missing, and the group is broken.

He's sick of this. He's _over_ the whole saving-people thing. This was supposed to be a goddamn _party._

So, while everyone else enters the library, he pulls DeStorm aside. "Hey." His tone is husky with regret. "Maybe we should slide out. Let the others do their thing. I need a freakin' break."

"Yeah," DeStorm agrees. "I almost died. I'm not about to risk my life for a kid who called me a killer."

Together, they hang out in the lounge, talking about nothing, and Jesse Wellens tries his best to ignore his better judgement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Jesse and DeStorm get themselves into a sticky situation. Also, our heroes discover a group of corpses, and Tana is determined to avoid Lauren's fate.


	16. Yes Men

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While everyone else looks for clues, DeStorm and Jesse make a _big_ mistake.

_There's no such thing as vampires, or sorceresses, or Joey Graceffa. There's just_ him _and_ her, _together, holding hands, laughing at jokes that the rest of the world will never understand._

_She smiles at him._

_She's so pretty when she smiles._

_She's alive, right? It was all a bad dream. A nightmare. She's fine. She's_ fine.

_She's—_

Alex shudders back to life, and reality hits him in the form of thousands of silky strands around his body. Screams echo in his ears. He rips through his prison and sits up on the desk. Six terrified faces stare back at him.

"Are you okay?" Gabbie squeals.

No. He's not.

The group helps him remove the spider's mess. "What's that?" Liza points at his chest, curiosity illuminating her expression. "He has a key attached to him."

She's right. A key has been pinned to Alex's jacket. He has no idea how it got there, or who put it on him, or why. In fact, he doesn't remember much of anything after...after...

Gabbie peels the key off him, taking a large hunk of webbing with it. "It says 'desk' on it."

"Give him room!" shouts Liza as Alex staggers to his feet. "Give him room!"

"Are you okay?" asks Tyler.

"What happened?" Liza wants to know.

"I don't know what happened." As Alex brushes the last few traces of webbing off his body, he racks his brain for memories of how he got into this mess. He remembers Lauren, tears, the Sorceress's angry speech, and then...an empty, blissful nothingness. "I just woke up in here, and I was in this spiderweb."

Concern is etched into Gabbie's features. "Did _she_ do this to you?"

Her words trigger one last memory: eight spindly spider arms, pulling him away from his friends' screams. He tries to recall his abductor's face, but comes up short once again. "I don't know!" _I should know. I should remember. Why can't I remember?_ "I blacked out. I don't know what happened."

"You guys," Andrea pipes up, "where's Jesse and DeStorm?"

_"Wait."_

Joey's mouth widens into an O. Tana starts repeating "no, no, no" in the devastated tones of a girl whose entire family just went missing. Gabbie rolls her eyes at the ceiling. Tyler gasps again.

Alex is indifferent. Jesse's a tough guy; he can take care of himself. He has a _gun,_ for heaven's sake. As for DeStorm... _that bastard's going down, and it's_ gonna _be because of me._

 

DeStorm and Jesse wander the halls, admire the decoration, and pretend that this is just a normal party. DeStorm, especially, is anxious to put the whole death thing out of his mind. _I came to have fun,_ he reminds himself. _What's the point of a party if you don't get a chance to enjoy yourself?_

A chance for them to enjoy themselves shows up ten seconds later, in the form of two hot chicks in black silk. "How's it going?" purrs the shorter of the two.

"Everything's good," is DeStorm's stunned reply.

She smiles and hooks her arm around his. "It's a _very_ nice night."

DeStorm can't believe it. Not only has a hot girl randomly showed up out of nowhere, but she's _actually_ taking an interest in him. Does she think _he's_ hot? Is this where his luck starts changing for the better?

The other, taller woman brushes her fingers against Jesse's shoulder. "Do you want to have some..." She arches her eyebrows in a _quite_ suggestive way. _"...fun_ with us?"

"Sure," says Jesse with a shrug. "I could use a little fun right now."

All thoughts of the rest of the group flee DeStorm's mind. Who needs them? They can go get themselves killed for all he cares.

They follow the girls upstairs. Since DeStorm's too busy admiring the hotties to care about what's going to happen next, it's Jesse who eventually asks "Where are we going?"

"Oh," chuckles his girl, "we're just gonna go drink a little bit."

"Okay."

Before long, DeStorm finds himself in the Harem, leaning against a _very_ comfortable cushion, enjoying a drink with Jesse and the hot chicks. His new lady friend raises her glass. "Cheers."

"Cheers to you." He clinks his glass against hers. "So what's _your_ name?"

"Kira," she replies.

"Kira." The name tastes like honey in his mouth. He can feel his face grow hot, which is weird, because he's the Railroad Tycoon. Railroad Tycoons don't blush.

Her dark eyes sparkle with a mischievous light. "What's yours?"

"I'm DeStorm."

"You're not a spider, are you?" Jesse asks his girl. A shrug is her response.

Kira moves closer to DeStorm, her voice a sweet inquiry. "What do _you_ think?"

"I don't know." DeStorm sips his drink and resists the urge to kiss her. "But whatever it is, I like it." 

 

 _Keep calm,_ Andrea tells herself. _I know you're afraid of spiders, but you can't show it. You don't want the group to see you as a weak link. Weakness means death. Keep calm. Keep calm._ Keep calm.

They unlock the desk, open up the cabinet, and find a letter inside.

"Read it!" Liza shouts.

Gabbie rolls her eyes again. "These spiders sure like riddles."

Andrea takes a deep breath, puts DeStorm and Jesse's mysterious disappearance out of her mind, and reads the note.

_My brotherhood of thieves have been lured here by maidens I curse meeting. I don't know the fate of my men, but I hope their deaths were quick. They promised us a gem whose value defied all others. But—_

The next word trips Andrea up a bit. "What is that word?" she asks Joey.

"Jorogumo," he replies.

_Jorogumo keeps it at the center of her precious web. I have hidden our plan to steal the gem in a red book._

"So the gem that we need is inside of her poisonous web," Andrea explains, almost gagging at the thought of dealing with another spiderweb, "but the plan to get it is in a red book. And there's a lot of books in here, so everybody just grab every red book."

 

 _Everybody just grab every red book?!?_ There are _so_ many red books in here. It's going to take all _night_ to find the right one. Why are they doing this? Their friends could be in trouble! Shouldn't they...why aren't they... _ugh!_

Tana snaps.

"One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six!" She counts off the red books, anger and worry permeating her voice. "Like, there's _so_ many red books! _Where's_ Jesse? _Where's_ DeStorm?"

_Are they dead?_

They _can't_ be dead.

Can they?

 

"What's going on?" Jesse stares at the deck of cards in Kira's hand, unable to suppress his excitement. "We playing poker?"

Kira nods. "How about five-card draw?"

"Yeah." Kira's friend, who's introduced herself as Haruko, has dark eyes, a button nose, and a shade of reddish-black lipstick that goes well with her tanned skin. She's beautiful, and Jesse looks forward to getting to know her better, but...there's something about her (as well as Kira) that doesn't seem right.

Then again, it's probably just his imagination.

"And," Kira continues, "just to make it a little more fun, losers lose a piece of clothing."

Haruko breaks into a grin. "That makes everything better."

"One winner per round." Kira surveys the group with an eager expression on her face. "Everyone else takes off something."

Jesse likes this game already.

 

"Wait. Guys." Joey squints at the spine of a brown, book-like object on the shelf. "The symbols are on _this_ book, but it isn't red."

He pulls it down from the bookshelf, only to discover that it isn't a book at all. "Oh," says Andrea. "It's a box for the book." 

"It's a book inside a book," is what Liza has to say about it.

Joey opens the box, and his heart soars when he sees the red book they've been looking for. Shouts of "Oh!" and "That's red!" fill the room. Joey, of course, immediately takes the book out of its box.

"Is there a key to open it?" Liza asks.

"No." Joey opens the book. "It just opens."

She smiles. "Oh, thank God."

"This is the plan," Joey breathes. He reaches inside the book and pulls out a small decoder. "What the hell?" He doesn't know what he was expecting, but this isn't it. "It's just like...a..."

"A stencil?" suggests Liza. "Arts and crafts?"

Joey frowns. "It's like something that you, like, hold up to something, to, like..." He holds it up to eye level as he talks.

"Oh!" Andrea exclaims. "You put it over a book, and it tells you the certain letters!

 _Of course!_ "Oh! Right! Like, it'll make a paragraph into a sentence."

Joey grabs the letter from earlier.

"Put it in the top corner," Alex suggests. Then, after Joey tries that, "Is that it? No? Flip it! Is it..."

But no matter where Joey places the decoder, the note fails to yield any results. "I feel like it's not this clue," Joey admits. "I feel like it would go up to something else."

And so, they head outside.

 

"My God."

"What the heck is _this?"_

"Omigosh!"

Two bodies hang from the balcony, wrapped in cocoons, completely drained of all their blood. The group reacts in shock and disgust. Several of them turn away.

Alex, however, can't take his eyes off of the corpses. _These could've been me,_ he realizes. _If the group had taken a_ little _longer to get to me, Jorogumo would've probably come back and finished me off, and then_ I'd _be hanging from there._ His blood runs cold at the thought. _And Jesse and DeStorm are still missing...what if these are_ them?

"Hey!" shouts Liza.

"What?" asks Joey.

"I found a note."

So she has. Everyone crowds around her, including Alex, who decides to leave the bodies alone for the time being. "What does it say?" Joey asks Liza, and she reads it aloud.

_These two are drained of their fluids, and I am once again hungry. I always laugh at how brittle and easily broken a human is without their blood._

Alex thinks of Lauren. That was how she died, wasn't it? Drained of all her blood...

His stomach hurts.

 

DeStorm is having the time of his life. Booze, games, hot girls, good friends...this is _so_ much better than the hell they were making him go through. This is what a party ought to be.

"Let me deal them up," Jesse insists, taking the cards. "I'm fast."

"Do you got any tricks?" Haruko slides closer to Jesse as she speaks.

He winks at her. "I do."

"Anybody need some more to drink?" asks Kira, holding up the bottle of wine.

DeStorm nods and lets her refill his glass. "She trying to get us tipsy," he snarks.

Jesse shuffles the cards with a grin on his face. "She's trying to get us _turnt!"_

"Oh," sighs Kira as she serves Jesse another shot, "our friends like to...uh...play hard."

"So who are your friends?" is Jesse's follow-up question.

Kira gulps a large amount of alcohol straight from the bottle before she replies. "Alison! She used to play with us."

Well, that settles it. If Alison trusts these chicks, that's good enough for DeStorm. Any lingering doubts about their intentions are wiped from his mind like chalk from a chalkboard.

They examine their cards. "All right," hums Kira. "Well, _I_ don't have anything, so I guess I'm taking off another piece of clothing." She stands up, and DeStorm gets an eyeful of her glorious ass. "I'll go with my shoe."

"This is what I came for," DeStorm sighs, leaning back against his cushion. "This is the _life."_

Kira and Haruko move like butterflies around the room, removing their shoes, bouncing their breasts in the cutest goddamn way. They hum, squeak, gasp, and giggle. DeStorm is captivated.

So, by the looks of it, is Jesse. "I've never played strip poker before," he confesses. "I'm excited."

The girls beam at him, and he laughs.

Kira turns her attention back to DeStorm. "What do you think about _that?"_

"Oh, I'm thinking _everything_ about that," he sighs as she wraps her scarf around his neck. His mind is a haze of peaceful lust. "I'm _never_ going home."

 

"I bet you it's the same size as what this is," Joey remarks, holding up the decoder. "So, guys, look for something this size. And look for something that's not obvious. It might not even be a book. It might be something..."

Andrea understands. She still doesn't like it, but she understands. "It could be _literally_ right in front of you."

That's when Alex Wassabi points at one of the corpse cocoons and says "Let's break them!" as if it's the best idea in the world.

 _He's insane,_ thinks Andrea. _He's_ actually _lost his mind. Between Lauren's death and his kidnapping, it was only a matter of time before he went crazy._

"Let's do it!"

"Guys," moans Joey, "I don't know..."

"I'm gonna do it." Even Alex's _smile_ is deranged. "I'm ripping it." Before anyone can stop him, he gives the corpse a good yank, and it tumbles to the ground, landing at the feet of the disgusted group.

Gabbie's "Ahhh!" sounds like she's going to be sick. Andrea doesn't blame her.

The lunatic that once was Alex starts digging through the corpse. Joey, who has apparently _also_ lost his mind, pulls down the other one and does the same thing. "Tyler, help me on this one," he says, and Tyler proceeds to go insane as well.

Soon, they all start screaming.

"Ugh!" Joey cries. "There's an _actual_ dead—"

"There's something in here," Tyler stammers.

Against her better judgement, Andrea joins Alex at his corpse. So do Tana and Liza. Gabbie, meanwhile, helps Joey and Tyler haul their corpse to a nearby table.

"It has to be deep in here," Alex mutters to himself, flinging aside the man's intestines as if they're balls of crumpled-up paper.

Guts. Blood. Body parts. A smell that Andrea can't quite identify. The Mystic is _this close_ to throwing up, but she swallows her nausea and keeps searching for clues within the corpse. "Did you find anything in yours?" she asks Joey and Tyler.

"No," Joey responds. "We're still looking."

"We're ripping it," adds Tyler, as if Andrea didn't already know that.

Liza wrinkles her nose in disgust. "Don't tell me this is Lauren!"

Andrea tries and fails to ignore Alex's shattered eyes.

 

Tyler can't _stand_ disgusting things. So as they rip the webbing off of their body, he's hoping _okay, just be, like, right on top of the body. Please. For me._

Of course, his prayers go unanswered, and he soon realizes that he's going to have to stick his _hand_ in the gooey gunk.

He takes the plunge, sifting through blood and organs, trying his hardest not to pass out from the sheer _ick_ factor of it all. _Come on, Ty,_ he reprimands himself. _If you want to survive, you've_ got _to stop being such a wuss about everything._

Ugh...make it stop... _make it stop..._

"There it is!"

Gabbie's voice breaks through his stomachache. Sure enough, there's a non-disgusting object at the center of the mess, and Tyler's job is done.

_Never again._

 

Well, now that they've had their fun with dead bodies, Liza's _more_ than ready to move on to the next step. "Is it in there?" she asks Tyler. "You found something?"

Tyler's voice is a sickening whine. "Yes...something..."

"That's the same size as the square!" Tana points out.

Gabbie snatches up the thing they found, whatever it is, and reads its inscription aloud.

_The samurai warrior drove his katana through the neck of the beast, then made the world sink underneath it._

A lightbulb lights up Liza's brain. "Translate that. Put the card on top of it."

"Yeah," says Joey. "I don't know what that means."

Gabbie takes the decoder from Joey and places it on top of the book, revealing the secret message.

"What does it say?" Tyler asks.

_Set on the sun._

Liza's initial reaction is _what the heck, that makes just about as much sense as the samurai stuff._ Thankfully, Andrea comes through with the meaning. "The sun!" She points to a yellow sun that's been carved into the desk. "There's a sun! Right here!"

"Guys," gulps Joey, "where's Tyler? Tyler?"

Gabbie scowls. "Tyler! Dammit!"

Dammit is right. _Tyler's_ missing now? They haven't even found Jesse and DeStorm yet! _What if they're dead? What if Tyler's next? What if what if_ what if—

"I'm just looking!" calls Tyler from the library.

 _Well, in_ that _case, thank you, Tyler Oakley, for almost giving me a heart attack._

Now that Tyler has been accounted for, the group is free to continue their mission. "Put it here," says Andrea to Alex, who's holding the book. "Set it on the sun."

He does.

In the library, the chest next to Tyler pops open.

"The box opened!" screams Gabbie. "The box opened!"

Everyone rushes back inside. "Omigod," murmurs Tyler, staring open-mouthed at the glowing chest. Liza, still in Explorer mode, peeks inside and finds a lantern.

"Take it out," Alex tells her. "Read it."

_This light reveals invisible things. Search the walls._

"Hold it up against the wall," Joey tells Liza, while Andrea starts saying "omigod" over and and over for no discernible reason.

"Hold on." Liza darts around the room, lantern in hand, running on a mixture of adrenaline and hope. "Searching. Searching. Exploring. I'm exploring!" She can do this. She's an Explorer. She can find anything. "Those are doors...not walls..."

Andrea's eyes light up. "Wait! The chalkboard!"

"Oh, good idea," says Joey.

Liza brings the lantern over to the chalkboard. As the light hits the board, three spooky words appear, and the seven YouTubers read them in unison.

_Jorogumo kills all._

Gabbie screams.

"Well, _that's_ not great," Tyler deadpans.

Liza blinks. Jorogumo kills all, huh? Well, she's _not_ gonna kill them. Not if Liza has anything to say about it.

 

 _Jorogumo kills all..._ The words freeze Tana's blood. _Jesse...DeStorm...are they dead after all? Were those bodies we dug through earlier theirs?_

_Are we too late?_

She forces herself to focus on the task.

"There's symbols!" shouts Liza. "There's symbols on the bottom."

So there are. "We have to find the symbols," Gabbie explains, and Tana sets herself to work once more. _I can't die here,_ she thinks as she searches the room. _If I find the symbols, they won't call me useless like they did with Lauren. I have to prove my worth. I have to live._

She finds a door. She's terrified of what might be waiting on the other side, but she ignores her fear and pulls it open. "Guys." A small, red room lies before her. "Guys guys guys guys guys."

Her meek stammering somehow gets the group's attention. Alex is the first to enter the room, and he, being the brainiac that he is, finds a clue. "Oh! The symbols! One of the symbols! Here! We got a box!"

 _See?_ Tana's mind declares. _I can do things. I can help._

 

This is getting out of hand. They've got a clue, and that's good, but there's _still_ no sign of Jesse or DeStorm anywhere. Gabbie has a funny feeling that Jorogumo got her claws on them.

When she sees that spider bitch, she plans on punching her straight in her goddamn throat.

The box that Alex found has a lock on it. It's not an ordinary lock with numbers on it, because that would be too easy. Instead, it has those weird symbol things on it, and they spend several minutes using the light to find the symbols. "Okay," sighs Gabbie, fed up with this whole endeavor. "Is there anything else on the box?"

"Wait!" shrieks Liza. "It opened!"

Inside the box are two gemstones. "Stones!" Gabbie grabs one, happiness returning to her heart. _Yes! The gems! No one has to die!_

"Fake stones, though," Liza points out.

"Yeah," agrees Joey. "Those are fake."

"These aren't real stones."

_There goes another dream._

The box also contains a note, which Alex reads aloud.

_They're almost perfect fakes. I made two, in case one of my men perished. Our plan was to swap the gem when Jorogumo was unaware...but we never made it that far into her web._

"So we need to swap those out with the real one when we get there," Andrea explains.

"Wait." Gabbie's throat goes dry with panic. "We have to go to her _web?"_

Alex nods. "We gotta Indiana Jones this thing."

Nope. Gabbie's changed her mind. She does _not_ want to punch the spider lady. She does not want to go anywhere _near_ the spider lady. And she _especially_ does not want to go into the spider lady's web. Forget it. Not happening. No way, Jose.

"Okay." Liza has the floor, and she speaks with all the courage and determination that Gabbie lacks. "So we need to go find the web and get our friends back!"

"Yeah, so let's go!" Tana shouts. "We gotta go!"

As they leave the library, Gabbie tries to toughen herself up. _It's okay, Gab. You got this. It's just a spider. It's just a web. You're not gonna die you're not gonna die you're not...gonna...die..._

 

Jesse's having fun. Really. He is. Playing card games with beautiful women in revealing outfits is pretty much his fantasy come true. So why are his instincts telling him that he's made a huge mistake?

Haruko and Kira bring out some books. "We have a little... _reading_ session," says Haruko with a smile, and Jesse's heart flutters against his ribs. _Wow...she's...she's so..._

"Aw, come on!" scoffs DeStorm. "We didn't come to _read!_ Go back to school!"

But his protests trail off into an awestruck "oh, okay" as Haruko and Kira reveal a pair of black blindfolds. Kira licks her lips. "We're making things a little more exciting...and dirty..."

Jesse shakes his head. _"What_ is happening?"

DeStorm, however, seems fine with this. "Oh, okay!" he sighs as Kira blindfolds him. "You do your thing, girl! I like the kinky stuff. My ex-girlfriend, she was just very lazy when it came to the kinky stuff."

Haruko ties her blindfold around Jesse's eyes. His world goes dark, and the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach grows into a basketball-sized lump of dread. "Oh, shit," he groans. "I can't see nothing." _Something's wrong something's wrong_ something's wrong.

DeStorm's still talking abut his ex. "She didn't wanna do _nothing."_

"I'm kinda nervous." _I should run._ "I just feel really bad about this." _I should get out of here find my friends again why did I follow them this isn't right I'm such an idiot I have to go leave_ now—

A needle plunges into his neck.

 

"The front door's open," Alex points out.

The words are barely out of his mouth when the door swings shut, prompting a chorus of gasps and screams from the group. Alex's mouth drops open. What the heck? How can a door close on its own? That doesn't make any sense at all.

"Who goes there?" shouts Alison, and before anyone can stop her, she opens the door and power-walks straight through it.

Everyone follows her.

They arrive outside just as four shadowy figures come into view. "Don't cut me!" exclaims a familiar voice. "Don't cut me!"

"There's Jesse!"

Jesse and DeStorm are dragged into the courtyard by a pair of sinister-looking women, each of whom has a knife to her captive's throat. "Help me!" screams Jesse, terror in his eyes, while DeStorm has a heartbroken expression on his face.

"Get back!" Alison snaps at the guys' captors.

Before Alex has a chance to react to the tense situation unfolding before him, Jorogumo herself descends from the sky on a string of spider silk. One look at her—eight eyes, bared teeth, long arms going every which way—and Alex remembers everything.

_"You're not ready yet."_

What did she mean by that?

Why is he still alive?

 

"Oh, shit!" Jesse cries.

Liza gasps. "No, she did _not!"_

Alex chokes out the word "spider" with a stunned look on his face.

Tana can't believe her eyes. This spider thing is _literally_ coming down from the sky. What kind of a house _is_ this? Vampires...sorceresses...flying spider ladies...what next? What _other_ horrors are in store?

Jorogumo lands on the ground and pulls herself into an upright position, her ugly mouth twisted into a sadistic smile. "They're _mine_ now!" she sneers, eyeing Jesse and DeStorm as if they're two delicious pieces of candy. "Men are meals to be taken at will, and _these_ two will taste... _nice."_

_No._ Tana balls her hands into fists. _You can't. I won't let you. I'll...I'll..._

"However," Jorogumo continues, "I like to watch my prey struggle. I will exchange these two males for one female life. Select two women by vote who will try to escape my web! Go!"

 

If Jesse had his gun, he could fight these spiders off him without breaking a sweat, but it's gone. They took it from him. He's defenseless.

He _hates_ being defenseless.

And now...two of his female friends have to fight to save him and DeStorm. While that logic _does_ make sense to Jesse (after all, two girls got him into this mess, so why not send two girls to get him out?), he isn't comfortable with the idea of someone else dying because of his stupidity.

"Oh, God," whimpers a clearly frightened Gabbie Hanna. "Okay."

Jesse wants to apologize, to tell them he's sorry for being such a moron, but all that comes out is an "uh" and a halfhearted shrug.

The group runs for the door. "We'll be back!" shouts Liza as they flee.

_I was supposed to be the Outlaw._

_I was supposed to protect everyone._

In this moment, all Jesse wants is a way to press rewind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Voting Time, Girl Edition! Which two of the four remaining girls will be sent in to save the boys? Also, Andrea has a plan, Joey and Tyler are smug, and the shadow of Lauren Riihimaki continues to hang over everyone's heads.


	17. Girls Just Wanna Not Die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of the girls must trade her life for Jesse's and DeStorm's. Time for everyone to make some tough choices...

As soon as the group returns to the parlor, Liza sums up their predicament. "Well, someone's dying. And it's a girl."

"One girl goes," adds Tana, "and the two guys are safe."

Andrea panics. _She's_ a girl. She hasn't been voted in at _all_ so far. There's a big red target on her back, and there's a one-in-four chance that someone is about to shoot her down.

She doesn't want to die. _Especially_ not at the hands of a spider woman.

So she starts scheming.

"Listen." She stands up. "I have an idea. What if we put the weakest girl and the strongest girl in? That way, we _know_ we're gonna come back with the strongest girl, and we get rid of the weakest link."

"Who is the weakest link?" Tyler asks.

"Well, we'll all decide who is!" Andrea tries to keep her voice calm, but a tiny sliver of fear sneaks its way across her words. "I mean, if you think it's me, then put me in, but I think I'm not the weakest link!" _And I hope to God that you guys feel the same way._

Liza shakes her head. "I think the two weakest should battle it out. I mean, one of them has to end up winning, and then we get rid of—"

"How about you guys leave your cases to us?" A smug smile slithers across Joey's face, and he puts his arm around an equally smug Tyler Oakley. "The gentlemen are safe."

_Way to rub it in, Joey._

Alex, who is _also_ safe, is not helping matters. "Guys over here," he says, moving to the couch where Joey and Tyler sit. "Girls over here." He points to Gabbie and Tana's couch. "I wanna see..."

Andrea rolls her eyes, but she and Liza reluctantly move to the girls' couch. _This is it,_ she thinks. _If we want to save the two guys, one of the girls has to trade her life for theirs. I just gotta make sure that it isn't me._

Now, if it was just DeStorm in danger, she'd say "good riddance" and move on, but Jesse's life is also on the line. Jesse, the Outlaw, the chill yet hotheaded badass who's tougher than the rest of them combined.

They _can't_ lose him. Not like this.

But who among them are they willing to sacrifice to save his life?

 

"You know what?" Gabbie's indignant voice rings out over the commotion of the rest of the group. "Let two of the boys die! We're going home!" She's pretty good friends with DeStorm and Jesse, but she's not about to die in a spiderweb just to save _their_ asses. Jorogumo can take them. She doesn't care.

Really. She doesn't.

But since the group has decided to accept this stupid trade-off, it's up to Gabbie to save herself from death. And if that means pleading her case to a bunch of boys, so be it.

Andrea goes first. "I think I've been pretty helpful thus far."

"How so?" asks Joey.

"I drank blood from the vampire. I went into the ballroom. I solved the riddle. I dug right into that body. I feel like I'm pretty helpful for the team."

The boys respond with a bunch of "uh-huhs," plus the occasional "true" thrown in for good measure.

Gabbie scowls. This is ridiculous. Andrea's no different from the rest of them. Why is she acting like the freakin' MVP all of a sudden? "Everything that Andrea said," she shoots back, "we've _all_ done here. We _all_ dug in the corpses, we were _all_ helping with the codes, _I'm_ the one who found the box and put it on the thing and read the code—"

"If you have to make somebody else sound bad to make yourself sound better," says Andrea with a sigh, "it's not working."

 _Well, screw you too._ "What did I say to make you sound bad?" Gabbie snaps.

"You said, 'Andrea, we've _all_ done that...'"

"Did that make you sound bad? Or did it say that we were also good?"

"It made _my_ case sound not as good!"

Just when Gabbie's about to slap Andrea right in her self-righteous face, Liza pipes up. "I found _so_ much! Joey wouldn't be sitting here on this couch if it wasn't for me!" She tosses an affectionate smile at the Savant. "Love you, Joey."

Joey smiles back at her. "Thank you, Liza."

"I shouldn't go in," Gabbie concludes, "because I contributed a lot too, and I think that I am a strong addition to this team." _Also, if you send me into that goddamn web, and I end up as Jorogumo's midnight snack, I will come back as a ghost and haunt you all. So there._

 

It's now or never. If Tana doesn't convince the group that she's worth keeping around, she's going to end up as Lauren 2.0. And she can't have that.

"I've been trying to make bold moves that I think other people might be scared to make," she explains in nervous tones. "Like, I veered off from the group in that room, all by myself, found that door, walked in there, found that little box..." Her hands shake as she begs for her life. "I didn't wanna open that door and be the next person to be taken away!"

"If you're not afraid to make bold moves to save other people," Tyler points out, "then why not go out there and save those people?"

_Because I don't wanna die!_

 

Dammit. _Dammit._ It's time to vote. It's every woman for herself, and Gabbie has never been more terrified.

Tyler goes first. Then Alex. Then Tana. As each person casts their vote, Gabbie mentally begs them not to vote for her. _Please. I'm scared. If you've ever been my friend, don't throw me to the spiders._

As fate would have it, she's the last to vote. She, of course, votes for Andrea, since Andrea trash-talked her earlier.

"Everyone's cast their vote." Alison picks up the pile, shuffles it, and draws a card.

_Please...not me...I'm not...I don't want..._

"Gabbie."

She sighs. Her shoulders slump. Her headpiece feels like it weighs a thousand pounds. "Dammit." _I tried, okay? I really did. I put in just as much work as everyone else. I'm not the weakest link in this team. You're making a mistake._

She remembers what awaits her and shudders.

 

Tana feels a pang of guilt as Gabbie's name is called. _Why? Why did I vote for her? I didn't mean to, it was an impulse, I couldn't decide, I just kinda picked at random...Gabbie...oh, God...please come back alive..._

Alison draws another card, frowns, and reveals it to the group.

"Tana."

"Oh, shit," says Andrea.

 _I failed._ Tana's entire body freezes up with fear. _I wasn't good enough. I couldn't convince them that I deserve to stay. And now...I'm going into the death challenge...against_ Gabbie _of all people..._

Is this karma?

_At least...if I die...my death will save Jesse...and DeStorm too, I guess..._

 

Joey is _so_ relieved that he is a boy right now.

"Gabbie. Tana." Alison nods at the two girls who've been voted into Jorogumo's game. "It's time to go."

"Bring the gems, each of you," is Tyler's gentle reminder.

Gabbie stomps out the door, an anxious shade of anger flashing across her sweat-soaked face. Tana, meanwhile, murmurs a quiet "bye, guys" to the group, and Joey is positive that this won't be an easy task for her.

Come to think of it, this challenge is going to be hard for _both_ of these girls. He hasn't seen them in action yet. He doesn't know what to expect. He doesn't even know who's going to win.

"Good luck, girls," calls Liza as they leave. "Tell Lauren we say hey."

Alex winces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Gabbie and Tana are forced to play Jorogumo's twisted game, and then it's time to say goodbye to another YouTuber.


	18. Gabbie's Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To save the Dudes in Distress, Tana and Gabbie must navigate a spider's tangled web. But, alas, this challenge is nowhere near as straightforward as it seems...

"Okay," DeStorm stammers, painfully aware of Jorogumo's claws digging into his back. "So we _probably_ shouldn't have wandered off...or played strip poker with spider ladies...or let them tie blindfolds around our eyes..."

Jesse rolls his eyes at him. "You _think?"_

DeStorm sighs. Yeah, now that he thinks about it, that was a bad idea. "But it's okay." His breath catches in his throat. "We're gonna get out of this. As long as they send a girl for her to eat—"

Jorogumo laughs.

"What the _hell_ is so funny?" DeStorm demands to know.

"Do _you_ really think that I'd kill another woman?" sneers the spider. "I would _never._ Women are too smart to fall victim to my fangs. Besides, their blood does not taste _nearly_ as good."

"So you lied," Jesse snaps.

"I wanted to make the game more interesting."

A string of swear words marches across DeStorm's mind as he realizes what Jorogumo is saying. "Wait...so when the girls get here...what's gonna happen to us?"

"Whoever wins my little game," says Jorogumo between giggles, "will get to choose a man to save from me. If you are chosen, you will be free to return to your friends alive, but if not..." She licks her hideous lips.

 _Dammit._ Chills run down DeStorm's spine. _I'm done. I'm dead. I'm spider food. They hate me! Why would_ anyone _choose to save me, especially when it's a choice between me and Jesse goddamn Wellens?_

No. Stop. He _can't_ give up yet. After all, they still need him.

 

Alison leads the girls down a winding path, and Tana takes a thousand deep breaths in an effort to calm herself down. _In. Out. In. Out._ She can do this. She can live.

But if she lives...what will that mean for Gabbie?

_I can't lose her._

Finally, they reach their destination. There's webbing everywhere. Gabbie looks like she's about to be sick, and Tana feels lightheaded, but both girls pull themselves together and read the note that's been left for them.

_To escape my web, you must each overcome three obstacles. Charge into the web until you each find a golden box. Inside will be your next instruction. Do not dally. I am hungry._

"Gabbie," Tana moans, but her voice isn't loud enough to be heard by anyone except herself.

"Go!"

They're off. Tana charges through the web, shoving her way through sticky silk, until she reaches one of the two golden boxes. Gabbie makes it to the other box around the same time, so that's good. They're off to an equal start.

Tana finds a key and a note.

_I would never kill another woman. It is one of my men who is going to die. They were simply bait to lure you in for my entertainment._

_Wait, what?_ Tana isn't sure how to process this new development. She and Gabbie are both safe, which is a _huge_ relief, but killing one of the guys instead...it doesn't sit right with her. She'd _much_ rather be able to save _everyone_ involved.

But since that's not possible, DeStorm will have to be their sacrifice.

 

Gabbie's always been one to appreciate a good dose of girl power.

 _I'm safe!_ She wants to throw her note in the air and do a touchdown dance. _I'm not gonna die! Tana's not gonna die! Us girls will live to fight another day!_

Of course, she's still gonna have to go into a spiderweb to save one of the guys, which sucks, because Gabbie hates spiders almost as much as she hates carbs. But at least she can take on the task without the fear of death hovering over her head.

_This key opens a chest with my eggs. Inside is a black pearl you will need to pass my man-maids and take the final climb._

Gabbie tosses the note aside, grabs a key, and sprints to the chests. Once again, she reaches her chest at the same time that Tana reaches hers.

It's a game. That's all. Since neither she nor Tana are going to die from this, she can just pretend like she's doing an obstacle course against her best friend. _I'm not holding back,_ she thinks to herself, surging on a rush of competitive adrenaline. _I'm not going easy on you, Tana, so you better watch out. I'm_ gonna _win this thing._

 

After Jorogumo tells him and DeStorm that only one of them is going to live, Jesse's guilt is overwhelmed by a flood of pure terror. He doesn't _want_ to die. Not like this. Not as a spider's dinner. Not when he still has so much left to do.

 _This is your own fault,_ snaps his conscience. _You dug your own damn grave._

He glances at his fellow captive, who's staring at the ground with a blank look in his eyes, and he realizes that there's still hope. Since none of the others liked DeStorm, odds are that whoever comes up here is going to pick Jesse to survive. After all, Jesse didn't get anyone's girlfriend killed, at least not to his knowledge.

Come to think of it, no matter what happens, Jesse and DeStorm are never going to see each other again. This is their last chance to say goodbye.

"DeStorm?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry, man." Jesse's not the type of guy who cries easily, but he's pretty damn close to falling apart right now. "I was an idiot. I shouldn't have asked you to hang back with me."

DeStorm responds with a weak smile. "It's fine. I hung back, didn't I? Not much we can do about it now." Then, after a long pause, "See ya, I guess."

Jesse can't bring himself to meet his friend's gaze. "Yeah. See ya."

 

Tana has a bit of trouble opening her chest. By the time she gets it unlocked, Gabbie is digging through the silky depths of her _own_ chest, pushing past several golden pearls in an effort to find the black one.

 _Okay,_ thinks Tana as she pulls out a mess of spider gunk, _so I'm behind. It's fine. I can still catch up._

A black pearl. She needs a black pearl. Here's a yellow one, and here's another yellow one, but where's the black? It's _here,_ isn't it? It _should_ be here _somewhere._

Gabbie fishes out a black pearl from her hunk of webbing. She runs across the field, dodging various silk obstacles in her path, and hands the pearl to one of Jorogumo's maids. The maid accepts the gift, freeing Gabbie to race up the stairs like an especially aggressive antelope.

Tana notices Gabbie's success, grits her teeth, and frees the correct pearl. She still has a chance. She _has_ to win. Jesse is counting on her.

Gabbie is halfway up the stairs. "I am _not_ in good shape!"

It's a bit hard to run in her Saloon Girl dress, but Tana makes it work. Once she reaches the spider maid, she hands her the black pearl, and the maid lets her move on to the next step.

_I'm coming, Jesse!_

 

The next step is to climb up a rope ladder that looks more like a giant web than anything else. Gabbie, who's still pretending that this is just a harmless competition, grabs hold of the ropes and starts to climb.

"Omigod."

Her sweaty palms struggle to maintain a decent grip.

Just as she reaches the halfway point, her foot slips. She screams, but she regains her footing almost immediately, and she continues her ascent with a smile on her face (though she also makes a mental note to never wear heels to anything ever again).

_I'm gonna win. I'm gonna beat Tana. I'm gonna show them that I'm worth keeping around._

She makes it to the top of the web _seconds_ before Tana begins to climb it. With her last bit of strength, she pulls herself over the railing and onto solid ground. "Oh." Her heart is going a million miles an hour. "Omigod."

 

Tana's _so close._ She's climbing the web, a few feet away from victory, but it's too late to take the lead from Gabbie now. The Vaudevillian is already in the process of swapping out the real gem for the fake one.

_I lost._

It's fine. It doesn't matter. They're both still going to live. And Gabbie is going to pick Jesse, because there's no way in the world that _anybody_ would choose to save DeStorm Power. _Especially_ with how suspicious he's been acting.

Gabbie hides the real gem in her clothes. Then, as Tana watches from her perch on the web, Jorogumo appears with DeStorm and Jesse. Both boys look scared out of their minds.

One thought barrels through Tana's mind: _It all comes down to this._

 

Jorogumo turns to Gabbie, an evil smirk on her disgusting face. "Who will you save?"

Gabbie gulps. She's been so focused on winning the challenge that she _completely_ forgot about the "choose who lives and dies" part. _Oh, God. Oh, God._ She doesn't know. She _can't_ decide. She _can't._

Jesse points at himself and mouths "me." DeStorm shrugs at her.

Time slows to a crawl. Gabbie looks from Jesse to DeStorm and back again, debating the pros and cons of each guy, her mind a scrambled haze of _I can't do this I don't wanna do this._ But then, she sees the hopelessness in DeStorm's otherwise brave expression, and she recognizes her own mask of confidence on his face, and she decides.

"DeStorm!"

 

DeStorm's name on Gabbie's lips hits Jesse like a sucker-punch to the stomach.

He sighs. His shoulders slump in defeat. His heart sinks to the bottom of his chest. _How?_ his mind screams. _How did I lose to the most unpopular person on the team? Am I not good enough? What did I do wrong?_

"Take your toy," Jorogumo snarls, pushing a very surprised DeStorm at Gabbie. "Go!"

The words _no, please, don't go, don't leave me_ are on the tip of Jesse's tongue, but Gabbie and DeStorm disappear around the corner before he has the chance to say them out loud.

"Are you kidding me?"

They couldn't even stay. They couldn't even face the outcome of their own goddamn choice. And now...this is _it,_ he's going to _die,_ he's going to die _alone,_ they probably won't even miss him when he's gone...

Jorogumo's hands force him to face her.

"What?"

_"Kneel."_

Under different circumstances, he might've said something awesome, like _"I hope I give you diarrhea, you crazy eight-eyed bitch!"_ But he's too deep in pre-death depression to be badass right now, so he closes his eyes, kneels, and braces himself for what's to come. "Is this gonna hurt?" he asks in a small voice. "Is this gonna hurt?"

Her only answer is her fangs biting into his neck.

It _does_ hurt. It hurts like hell. A haze of agony clouds his vision, and he screams until his voice is gone. His head, neck, shoulders, and chest all feel like they're on fire. _Make it stop..._ An eternity passes. _Please...end already...let me die..._

He doesn't know how long it takes for him to succumb to the darkness, but when he does, death comes as a relief.

 

Tana doesn't know what's worse: listening to Jesse Wellens's tortured screams as Jorogumo drains the life out of him, or realizing that, yes, the screaming has stopped, and now he's gone forever.

 _It's my fault he's dead,_ she moans internally. _I wasn't fast enough. If I had been...just a_ little _bit faster...I could've saved him._

She hugs the web and cries.

It takes the combined efforts of two spider maids to force Tana down from the web. "Don't cry," the taller one purrs into her shoulder. "You're too beautiful to cry. Besides, men like that are not worth crying over."

"Come with us," insists the other one. "Your friends are waiting for you."

Tana doesn't have enough energy to protest, so she lets the maids escort her back to the parlor. She spends the entire walk back trying and failing to forget the sound of Jesse's final moments.

 

"You _know_ they're gonna hate you for this, right?" DeStorm asks Gabbie as the two of them head back to the parlor.

She shrugs. "So? You're a cool guy. You deserve to stick around."

As if to punctuate her point, she offers him her arm. He takes it, and as he does, he realizes that _hey, maybe it's not gonna be me against everyone else after all._ "Does this mean..." He smiles. "Does this mean we're allies now? You and me?"

"Yeah." Her brown eyes sparkle with something close to joy. "I'd like that."

DeStorm keeps his cool, but on the inside, he's having a celebration. Gabbie saved him. Gabbie sees good in him. Gabbie doesn't blame him for the Lauren thing. Now, with her by his side, he has a chance to take down all those whiny bastards standing in his way.

She's powerful. He's invincible. Together, they're going to live.

 

When Tana arrives at the parlor, flanked by two spider maids, Joey's mind jumps to the obvious conclusion. "Wait! Tana!" _Gabbie's dead. Jorogumo got her. Another friend I'll never see again._

Shouts of "Omigod!" and "No!" fill the room. Tana stares at the floor, an apologetic look on her flushed face.

And then...Gabbie shows up, alive, with an equally alive DeStorm in tow, and wild confusion rules the parlor. Everyone starts talking at once.

"What?"

"Wait!"

 _"Jesse's_ gone?"

"They're _both_ back?"

"What the hell?"

"What happened?"

"Why are you both back?"

"What's going on?"

"Gabbie and I had to compete to save one of the guys," Tana explains, her voice a quiet whisper of regret, "and I lost."

"Are you _kidding_ me?"

"Wait, _what?"_

Tana nods. "The spiders didn't want us girls. They wanted one of the guys. It was a trick. They were tricking us."

Joey scowls. He can't believe Jorogumo lied to them. It's like they're playing a game with someone else's rules, and the rules keep changing every twenty seconds. He has half a mind to find the spider woman and give her a good kick in the teeth.

Furthermore, because of Jorogumo's lies, he's lost Jesse. He wasn't prepared to lose Jesse. Jesse was not the type of guy he expected to die this early. The man was an Iraq vet who won the first season of _Fight of the Living Dead_ (the same season that Joey "died" on, no less). He was tough. He was a fighter. And yet, in the end, he didn't have a chance.

_It's not fair._

But then again, this game was never fair.

 

Cheating death for the second time and gaining Gabbie's trust _might_ have inflated DeStorm's ego a bit. "You bitches can't kill me."

"Me neither," says Gabbie with a grin.

"We didn't even _wanna_ kill you!" Joey snaps. "What are you guys _talking_ about?"

 _"I_ did," Alex pipes up.

 _Oh, yeah._ DeStorm almost forgot about the pipsqueak who wants him dead. _Thought the spider would get me, huh? "Omigod! He's still alive! The big bad wolf is still alive!"_ He rolls his eyes at the disappointed look on the Novelist's face. _I'm still here, Alex! I'm still here, and I'm always gonna be here. Me and Gabbie will be here long after the rest of you are gone._

 

"Why does Gabbie look like DeStorm now?" Liza wants to know.

Tana bites her lip. She doesn't know why Gabbie agreed to team up with someone as sketchy as DeStorm, let _alone_ why she decided to save him over the infinitely more reliable Jesse Wellens. Now, as Liza just pointed out, the two of them have identically smug expressions on their faces, and Tana feels like her brain is about to break.

 _Gabbie,_ she thinks, _you need to watch your back. DeStorm is not to be trusted. If you die, he will_ totally _laugh at your death._

 

Gabbie's glad that she chose to save DeStorm. Their newfound bond has given her a rush of strength unlike anything she's felt all night. They _get_ each other. She feels like she can do _anything_ as long as she's got him, and that _includes_ telling off the people who threw her to the spiders.

"I'm _not_ happy that I got sent to Final Death." She stares them down, doing her best to look as intimidating as possible, while DeStorm paces in circles around her. "Obviously, I didn't like climbing a web in my heels, and obviously, I'm coming back a little bit tougher, a little bit more cautious, and a little bit warier. But at the end of the day, we still have to work together to figure this out." She pulls out the gem she got from Jorogumo's gem holder. "We have a gem. We are one step closer."

DeStorm says the words "one step closer" along with her, and she winks at him. _See? He gets me. We're pretty much kindred spirits at this point._

With that, she puts the gem in the gem map.

"Wait!" Alex points at the mantlepiece. "There's a note."

Gabbie grabs it. DeStorm looks over her shoulder, while everyone else listens to her read it aloud.

_Two dead and more to go. I wonder which horrid face will be next. I would start praying. After midnight, things change. —The Sorceress._

Joey frowns. "After midnight?"

"What time is it now?" asks DeStorm.

Alison, of course, is quick to answer. "It's only four hours until midnight."

The Sorceress's maniacal laughter echoes throughout the house. Gabbie's hairs stand on end. _I'm not afraid,_ she tells herself. _I won't be afraid anymore. I have allies. I'm gonna be fine. I will_ not _die tonight._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Jesse, the biggest waste of potential in all of Escape the Night history.  
> Next chapter: Terrifying faces. Also, Alex and DeStorm still hate each other's guts, and Gabbie is hungry.


	19. To Arms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group is still reeling from the deaths of Lauren and Jesse, but there's no time to grieve. Instead, they have to investigate a bunch of terrifying faces, locate the Helm of Obedience, and try not to think about all the death that's still to come.

The sound of that awful cackling noise chills Alex to the core. "Where did that laugh come from?" he demands to know.

"Honestly," Joey replies, "I think that was the Sorceress."

Tyler's eyes widen with fear. "Is this, like, a _game_ to her?

"I'm _hungry!"_

Everyone turns to stare at the source of this random outburst, which comes courtesy of a _very_ annoyed Gabbie Hanna. An awkward silence fills the room. Alex considers telling her off, but then he decides that he doesn't have the energy to deal with her right now.

Thankfully, Andrea changes the subject. "She said 'at midnight' is when something's gonna happen."

"But midnight is so _soon!"_ Tana complains.

Joey, meanwhile, has turned his attention back to the gem map. "What _is_ that?" he wonders aloud, examining the symbol above the spot where the third gem is to be placed.

Alex takes a look. "Oh. It's an axe and a gun."

"Oh!" Joey exclaims. "Good eyes!"

"So somebody's gonna have to fight." Alex fakes a smile, takes a deep breath, and curls his fingers into fists. "Lauren's gone." He points at DeStorm, his body shaking with a potent mixture of grief and hatred. "Because of you."

DeStorm shrugs. "She deserved to go. It was me or her."

It's taking all of Alex's willpower not to kill DeStorm right here in front of everyone. He knows that the Sorceress is trying to turn the group against each other, and he doesn't _want_ to fall into her trap, but he can't help it. He _hates_ DeStorm. He hates him more than he's ever hated anyone in his life. His mind goes red at the thought of his smug, snakelike smirk, and he wants nothing less than to watch him die.

Is that wrong? Probably. But Alex is past the point of giving a damn.

 

"I found this on the doorstep at the beginning of the night," says Alison, producing _yet another_ clue. This time, it's a scroll, held together by a simple red ribbon, which Alison immediately hands to Joey.

 _Why,_ thinks Tyler, _if you have all these things, are you holding them back from us?_

Joey opens the scroll. It's a propaganda flyer, blazing with black and red letters.

_To arms! Your country needs you! Open the key to freedom! Helm the ship of fury! The Dark Army has taken our land. Obedience required. Behind enemy lines, a terrifying enemy waits. The South will stand forever! $300 bounty. Join the face of freedom._

The whole thing is a bunch of warmongering gibberish to Tyler, but Alex is quick to find the hidden message within its thick print. "Let's read the red," he suggests.

"Yeah," Andrea agrees. "Read just the red."

_Key to helm of obedience behind terrifying face._

_"Her_ face!" shouts Gabbie, pointing.

"Hey." Liza, who seems to think that Gabbie is referring to _her_ face, scowls. "That is _not_ terrifying."

But it turns out that Gabbie is referring to a portrait of a figure whose milk-white face looks like it's being sucked into a wormhole. "Take it off!" orders Alex, and when Joey does so, they find a key on the back of the picture.

Andrea frowns at the key's accompanying tag. "Green room?"

"Yeah," says Tyler. "There's a room over there that's green." The words sound stupid coming out of his mouth, but he says them anyway.

 

 _Here we are again,_ sighs Tana to herself as the group heads down the hall. _Another search to find something that unlocks which basically means someone else is gonna die. How many times are we going to have to do this before we can go home?_

Eight gems. Eight quests. Eight deaths?

She hopes not.

Drawers slam. A demonic voice hisses at them. Everyone screams. Several take off running. Gabbie accidentally smashes Tyler into a nearby wall.

 _"This way,"_ sneers the voice.

Tana doesn't want to listen to a demon, but she doesn't have much of a choice, so she and the others follow the hellish sound down the hallway and into the green room. As soon as they're inside, they try their best to calm their racing hearts.

"That was _terrifying,"_ Joey gasps.

Tyler points at the key in Joey's hand. "What does that thing say?" he asks between breaths.

"It just says 'green room.'"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait!" pipes up Andrea, who's somehow managed to keep her composure. "You have a key?"

"Yeah."

A chest waits for them. As Joey uses his key to open it, Tana hugs herself in an effort to soothe her frazzled nerves. "This just keeps getting scarier and scarier."

The chest opens, revealing the Helm of Obedience to the group.

"What the..."

"Someone's gonna have to fight," Alex realizes aloud.

Tana nods, her heart in her mouth. "Someone's fighting."

 _The Helm of Obedience,_ announces the accompanying note. _Its wearer must surrender their will to the voice of the Dark Army if they wish to proceed._

The note's instructions freeze Tana's blood. _So whoever puts on this Helm of Obedience has no control,_ she realizes. _They'll have to do whatever the "Dark Army" tells them to do._ The thought is horrifying.

 

A frown flickers across Andrea's face. "So who wants to do it?"

"I got a small head," says Liza, clearly not giving a shit.

"I mean..." Joey gulps. He doesn't feel comfortable letting any of his friends put themselves under the Dark Army's control. _My party. My responsibility._ "I'll do it." Before anyone can stop him, he takes the helmet and pulls it over his brown hair. "Is it a good look?"

Tyler nods. "It's a good look."

"Oh!" Liza smiles. "It looks cute with your hair!"

_"Hello, Joey."_

The voice slithers through Joey's ears like a malicious parasite, and Joey gasps. "It's talking to me!"

"Shut _up,"_ says Andrea in disbelief.

"You hear it?" Alex's eyes light up. "Listen."

_"You must follow my instructions without fail, or your life will be forfeit. Do you understand?"_

Joey is beginning to regret his decision.

_"Do you understand?!?"_

_"Yes!_ I understand! Omigod."

It occurs to him that he doesn't _know_ what the Dark Army is about to make him do. He could be forced to hurt himself, or even hurt his friends...and if he resists, he'll be killed on the spot.

He hopes it won't come to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Wearing the Helm of Obedience has scary consequences. Also, Jesse's gun makes a reappearance.


	20. The Helm of Obedience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Under the Helm's influence, Joey Graceffa turns downright dangerous.

_"Tell your friends to follow you."_

Joey gulps. "It says to follow..." _Please, Helm of Obedience, leave them alone. Don't make me hurt them. There's already enough blood on my hands._ "Follow me."

"We _all_ follow you?" asks Tyler.

"Yeah. Follow me."

DeStorm snorts. "So y'all gon' just _follow_ him?"

"We have to surrender to proceed," Alex replies, as if it's a perfectly reasonable thing to do. His voice is cheery, but his smile is forced, and he's glaring at DeStorm with a furious fire in his eyes.

_"Walk down the hallway."_

Joey leaves the green room and enters the adjacent hallway. Everyone follows him, even DeStorm, who's muttering "I can't believe we following a damn helmet" under his breath.

_"Go up to the top of the stairs _alone."__

__

__

Okay. Good. If the Dark Army wants Joey alone, then his friends aren't in any danger after all. "Stay here," he tells the guests, who have all gathered at the foot of the stairs. "Stay here."

"Wait." Alex frowns. "We _all_ stay here?"

Joey nods as he begins his lonely climb. "Yeah. Stay here."

"Liza, I got you," murmurs Tana, hugging the smaller girl close to her chest.

_"Keep walking."_

Joey leaves his friends behind, but he can still hear their voices from downstairs. "Everybody keep your eyes peeled," Gabbie commands.

"We should all, like, face outwards," suggests Tana.

_"Walk forward."_

"Okay." He's at the top of the stairs now. There's a small room directly in front of him. And in that room...

_"You will see a case on the floor."_

"I see it."

"Joey!" shouts Alex. "What's happening?"

_"Open it!"_

Joey obeys. "Oh..." It's a gun. It's _Jesse's_ gun, no less. There's no mistaking its metallic tint. "Omigod." Just _looking_ at it is enough to assault Joey's brain with waves of stormy grief for his fallen friend, along with an ever-growing sense of apprehension. "Guys?"

Liza's voice echoes from the bottom of the staircase. "Joey, what's going on?"

He picks up the gun.

 _"You can handle_ this."

As cold laughter rings in his ears, Joey turns around and makes eye contact with his bewildered friends. _Oh, no._ A lump of dread forms in his throat. _Please, no. Don't do this. Don't make me..._

 

As much as Gabbie's scared of the Sorceress, she's a _lot_ more scared of whatever's about to come out of the crazypot known as Joey Graceffa. _Especially_ when said crazypot has a gun.

"Are you okay?" Liza asks.

Alex points at the weapon in Joey's hand. "Jesse's gun..."

Joey walks down the stairs, gun at the ready, a disturbingly dark expression on his face. All of Gabbie's danger alarms are going off at full blast; despite the fact that Joey's their friend, it honestly looks like he's about to _kill_ them.

Tyler bites his lip. "Joey? What are you doing with your gun?"

"What are you _doing?"_ Liza demands to know.

"No, no, no," stammers Tana. "No, no, no, no, no..."

Gabbie puts herself between Joey and the others, extending her arms out to protect her friends. _It's okay._ She swallows down her mounting panic. _I'm not scared. We're gonna be fine. Joey might be under the spell of an evil helmet or whatever, but he wouldn't kill us. I_ know _he wouldn't._

 

_"Now point that gun at your friends."_

Joey doesn't want to do it. He's already got the deaths of eight (no, _ten,_ he reminds himself, Lauren and Jesse are _dead,_ and they'd still be alive if not for him) friends on his conscience. 

But he has no choice.

So he closes his eyes, aims the gun at the cluster of terrified YouTubers, and tries not to cry.

"Joey?"

"No!"

"Put it down!"

"Joey! Stop! _Joey!"_

 

 _He's gone crazy,_ thinks DeStorm. _Something's wrong with his head._ He can only assume that it's the helm's fault. Why the hell _else_ would Joey Graceffa be threatening them with a gun right now?

At any rate, he steps away from the group. He doesn't want the gun pointed at him. He's not with them. He doesn't care. Not at all.

(Although...to be honest...seeing Gabbie shield the others worries him a bit...but not _that_ much...)

 

 _"You cannot hesitate with this next action,"_ hisses the Helm as Joey blocks out the sound of his friends begging for their lives, _"or your life will be over. Do you understand?"_

__

__

Joey nods despite himself.

"Just do it!" Andrea wails.

"Joey," pleads Liza, "put the gun down."

 _This is it._ Joey's finger is on the trigger. _They're going to make me shoot someone._ He chokes back a sob. _I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm—_

_"I want you to open the door, step out onto the porch, and shoot the first man you see."_

_Oh, thank God._ As he turns away from the group, Joey lets out a breath that he didn't realize he was holding. _I have to shoot some guy on the porch. Not my friends. They're safe. For now, they're safe._

 

When Joey pulls the gun away from the group, Gabbie's first thought is _Whoo! I saved the day! Thank God!_ Then again, she wasn't scared in the first place. Why _would_ she be?

Joey heads for the door.

"What are you doing?" Alex asks.

"Good." There's still an overtone of fear in Tana's voice. "Good move."

Andrea, who's spent the last thirty seconds cowering behind Gabbie, straightens up and scoffs. "I knew it was all..." She grins. "He wouldn't do that."

As Gabbie and the others watch, Joey pulls the door open and steps onto the porch. For some reason, he's still got his gun at the ready. Tana whimpers, and Gabbie grips her hand in an effort to calm her down.

There's an army guy outside. Joey shoots him down without a twinge of hesitation.

"No!"

"Omigod!"

"You _killed_ him!"

Gabbie's shocked. She's also a little turned on. Okay, a _lot_ turned on. Why does violence turn her on? Maybe she should look into that once she gets out of here.

 

Alex can't believe it. He just can't believe it. Joey killing a vampire is one thing, but now he's murdering actual _humans._ He just _killed_ someone. And the worst part is, Alex isn't sure whether or not he's okay with it.

"Guys, come on," says Joey, his voice hoarse.

DeStorm shakes his head. "Damn helmet turned him into a murderer."

As Joey steps onto the porch, Alex shivers, and he's not sure whether it's from the cold night air or from the hopelessness of the situation. _We're changing,_ he realizes. The longer they stay in this house, the more evil he can see in everyone's hearts.

Including his own.

 

The Helm instructs Joey to _"take the bugle from his side,"_ so Joey approaches the lifeless body of the man he just killed and picks up his fallen bugle. "Sorry," he mutters to the corpse.

_"Go to the back of the foyer and stand before the outside door."_

"Is that a trumpet?" DeStorm asks as Joey reenters the foyer.

Tana's still a little on edge. "Don't shoot."

"It says I have to go in the backyard," Joey explains, unable to look any of his friends in the eye. _I shot a man. They saw me do it. They know what kind of person I am. Will they still want to be my friends after all this is over?_

_"Put the gun down."_

Joey is _more_ than happy to follow _that_ command. "Okay." He drops Jesse's gun on the floor. His friends are officially out of danger.

_"Take off the helmet and blow the bugle."_

Andrea and Liza rush to help Joey remove the helm from his head, and Joey feels a rush of affection towards them. They still like him. He still has friends. For now.

"Good man," mutters DeStorm.

_"Goodbye, Joey."_

"Goodbye." As Joey pulls the helmet off his head, he breathes a sigh of relief. It's done. It's over. His mind is his own again.

"I would keep that on," Gabbie suggests. "That looks like protection."

 _Hell no._ "Literally the _devil_ was speaking to me!"

"I don't like it," says Tyler.

Joey agrees.

 

That demonic helmet is off of Joey, and Andrea's glad of it, because she honestly felt like they were about to _die_ back there.

She hates that feeling.

"He said the next thing to do is to blow this," Joey explains, showing off the bugle he retrieved.

"Okay." Andrea bathes herself in calm, determined not to show an ounce of weakness. "Everybody just be ready for something to happen."

"Ready?" asks Joey.

"No," moans Tyler.

DeStorm rolls his eyes. "Just blow the damn bugle."

Joey blows the damn bugle. A millisecond later, cannon fire echoes throughout the house, sending everyone into a state of flummoxed fear. "What's going on?" Joey asks between gasps, as if any of them have an answer for him.

Gabbie's eyes grow wide. "Those are cannons!"

"Is it..." Tyler points. "That?"

Two angry-looking armies face each other on Joey Graceffa's front patio. One of them is clearly a Confederate army, while the other's soldiers wear black cloaks and eye shadow.

"I don't care if we're the last people on the goddamn earth," snaps a man who appears to be the Confederate general. "We ain't gonna stop fighting!"

The leader of the other army glares daggers at his rival. "This is _our_ land!"

"Should we hide?" Andrea asks. She doesn't know why she's asking, since every instinct she has is screaming _yes, hide right now, don't go anywhere near these violent people._

_"Shhh!"_

Unfortunately, the soldiers hear Andrea's question and subsequently notice the YouTubers. The Confederate general pulls a gun on them.

"Oh, girl," Tyler sighs. "Look what you've done."

"He's pointing a gun!" shouts Liza.

"You _did_ say 'hide,'" Gabbie admits to Andrea, "and we did not."

Andrea tries not to tremble. This is the second time she's had a gun pulled on her in the last ten minutes, and at this point, she never wants to see a gun ever again.

Joey steps onto the patio. "Maybe...maybe I can talk to them..."

"You see a _war_ going on, and y'all just gonna go out?" DeStorm protests.

Apparently, the answer to that question is "yes," because the entire group follows Joey onto the patio. Fortunately for them, Alex is quick to spot the fourth gem, which the Confederate general is wearing. "He has a gem!"

"Oh." The general smiles. "You want this? You're gonna have to fight."

"Could you just _give_ it to us, maybe?" Gabbie suggests.

The general ignores her. "You're gonna have to get dirty. Now, see, the team that loses this here skirmish...one of them's gonna have to die. I don't see no other way."

Andrea sees _several_ other ways, but she keeps her mouth shut.

"Whose side are y'all fighting on?" the Confederate general asks.

Joey frowns. "What do you mean, 'side?'"

The leader of the other army speaks up. "The Confederates are a weak lot." He has a heavy accent, though Andrea can't quite place it, and he paces the patio as he talks. "Join me, and we will crush them beneath our heels."

"The Dark Army will soon be returning to its forgotten myth it once crawled out of," is the Confederate leader's confident reply. "Stick with me, and you'll live."

"Guys," Joey says in soft tones, "that's the only way we're going to get the gem. I think we should do it."

Tyler's shoulders slump. "We need the gem."

The general of the Dark Army stares at them, his face unreadable. "Then pick two captains. One for the Dark Army, and one for the Confederate filth."

That's when it hits Andrea like a baseball to the head. _We're going to war. We're going to have to fight each other. Whoever wins this battle is safe, but whoever loses..._

She sets her jaw. She can't afford to lose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The group must play a game that a lot of you probably used to play in PE. Also, Tana proves her worth, Alex is still bitter, and the DeStorm-Gabbie alliance have each other's backs.


	21. A House Divided

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew that this house of horrors would require them to play Capture the Flag? At any rate, it's the Confederates vs. the Dark Army, and the only prize is life.

"I'll be a captain," says DeStorm nonchalantly. Maybe if he leads his team to victory, everyone will stop giving him shit about the whole Lauren thing. Of course, he doesn't care _what_ they think of him, but it would be nice to get them all off his back.

"This is like school," Tana complains. "I never got picked for this."

"I never got picked either," admits Andrea.

Alex points at DeStorm. "Let me go against him!" He's _itching_ for a fight, and DeStorm has half a mind to smack him down right now.

But in the end, it's Joey who takes the other captainship. "I feel like it's important," he explains as he joins the Dark Army's ranks, "because you guys think I'm responsible for this."

And that's how DeStorm Power, the token black guy of the group, ends up becoming the captain of the Confederates.

Go figure.

 

To be honest, Liza has no idea what's going on. But she figures that it's probably best to wait and see where this crazy road is taking them. Hey, at least nobody got shot. Yet.

Joey, the Dark Army's brand-new captain, gets first pick. "I choose...Liza."

"What?" Liza wasn't expecting to be picked first. She isn't sure if it's because Joey genuinely thinks that she's the best potential soldier, or because of that time they spent together in the ballroom. Either way, she's touched. But, as she always does, she plays it off as a joke. "The Dark Army, and you choose the brown girl? Okay."

Joey smiles at her. She smiles back.

 

"Gabbie," says DeStorm, "you saved my life once. Why don't you come on over here?"

Gabbie's heart is bursting with happiness as she takes her place by DeStorm's side. _See?_ She grips his arm. _DeStorm and I just get each other. Together, we're gonna make it out of here._

 

In his mind, Alex is begging Joey to _pick me, please pick me, I'll be the best teammate ever, just_ please _don't let me get stuck on DeStorm's side..._

But Joey isn't listening to Alex's mental pleas. "I choose Tyler."

"Good choice," says Tyler.

It's DeStorm's turn. "Come on over here, Andrea," he says, and Andrea does.

At this point, Alex and Tana are the only ones who haven't been picked. "And then there were two," Tana murmurs to no one in particular.

 _Come_ on, _Joey, pick me, pick—_

"Tana."

 _Great._ Alex scowls at the ground. So not _only_ did he get picked last, but he got picked by _DeStorm's_ team.

By _default._

 

Of _course_ Joey's not picking Alex. Not when DeStorm is the opposing captain. If those two are on the same team, it'll be _sure_ to start some drama, and Joey's team will have a better chance of winning whatever war they have to fight.

"First," says the Dark Army's general, "you need your colors." He and his soldiers give Joey, Liza, Tyler, and Tana red armbands.

Upon noticing that his armband matches his coat, Tyler's eyes light up with temporary happiness. "Oh! This goes."

"We don't wanna be up for elimination," Joey tells his teammates. "We have to make sure that it's them." _And hopefully, DeStorm's team is going to self-destruct before it can even get off the ground._

 

As he puts on his yellow armband, DeStorm feels a rush of confidence. He's _going_ to win. He's got Gabbie, the savviest girl he's ever met, as well as Andrea, who can be pretty crafty when she wants to be. Even Alex, as annoying as he is, has enough smarts to carry them to victory.

And Joey's team? Weaklings, all of them. Tana's a dumb blonde, Tyler screams like a little girl whenever anything _remotely_ scary happens, Liza's good at finding things but not much else, and Joey is Joey. _They can't keep up with us._

"All right." He turns to face his team. "So I'm the captain of this team, and what we gonna do is, we gonna win. We got the brains, we got the girls, we got the weapons, and we got the soldiers."

Alex, of course, _has_ to interrupt his speech. "We're on the same team now, and if you need me, I'll step up. But after this, we're back to enemies."

_When it's all over, he gonna get it._

 

As the two teams head downstairs, Tyler can feel his heart in his throat. _So this is war._ He winces. _What kind of war is this going to be? Are we_ actually _going to fight each other, like, with weapons and stuff?_

If so, he's dead already.

They reach the battlefield. Tyler stands with Tana, Joey, and Liza on one side of the field, while DeStorm and his team stand on the other. "Hi, guys!" Joey's smile is clearly fake. "This is so sad. We're, like, against each other now."

"Gotta do what we gotta do," Alex replies.

 _How is he so_ calm _about this?!?_

"This side is for the Dark Army." The Confederate general, who introduced himself as Cash on the way downstairs, points at the side of the field where Joey's team stands. _"This_ side of the estate..." He gestures to the other side. "...for them Confederates. The patio is no man's land and the medical station. The first team to find the location of the flag is the victor. You're allowed one person on each team to stay behind in their own territory and stand guard."

 _Oh._ Tyler breathes a sigh of relief. _So it's just Capture the Flag._

The Dark Army's leader picks up where Cash left off. "When in enemy territory, your armband can be torn off, and an enemy guest must escort you to the medical station. You must stay there for five minutes before you are allowed to rejoin the fight."

Tyler sighs. So, basically, if he's caught, he'll be stuck in the medical center for five minutes, watching whatever's going on and being unable to help. That sounds like torture.

 

Both DeStorm and Joey are handed a set of "orders." DeStorm reads his aloud to his team.

_Confederate guests: your mission is to find five golden pegs hidden in Dark Army territory and then insert them in your warlock's chest, where you will gain the final item needed to recover the enemy's flag._

"Got it," says Alex.

_Game on._

 

According to the "orders" Joey received, he and his team must find five red pegs hidden in Confederate territory. If they can do that, then they'll find the flag, and they'll be safe from whatever death the soldiers have planned.

Joey wants to win. He doesn't want Liza, Tyler, or Tana to die, and he sure as hell doesn't want to die himself. _I have to save us._ He grits his teeth. _I have to find that flag._

Cash fires his gun into the air, and the game begins.

The YouTubers run around the fields. Some look for pegs in enemy territory, while others guard their own territory from the enemy. The Confederates and the Dark Army soldiers start fighting each other.

Joey, who's already deep into Dark Army territory, sees a box. _Is there a peg in here?_

"Where _are_ these things?" Andrea screams from the other side of the field.

He picks it up and smashes it onto the ground. Sure enough, a red peg is revealed.

 _I found it!_ As he races back to his own territory to put the peg into their warlock's chest, he's beaming with pride. _I found the first peg! Only four more to go!_

 

Tana, being the finesser of the group, already has a strategy in place.

"Oh, DeStorm!" she calls in a honey-sweet voice, halfheartedly attempting to sneak past the Confederate guard. "You wanna get it? Huh? You wanna get it?"

Tyler runs past them, carrying a peg, but DeStorm is too distracted by Tana to notice.

"So you wanna get it?" she taunts. "Let's go!"

He grabs her, pulls off her armband, and takes her away. _Fool,_ she snickers to herself. _You think you beat me. Little do you know that everything is going according to plan._

The longer she drags this out, the more opportunities her teammates have to sneak into enemy territory and find pegs without DeStorm's intimidating presence. So she trips over her own feet on the way to the medical center and shouts "Oh, no! My shoe's untied! My shoe's untied!"

While DeStorm helps her tie her shoe, she sees Tyler and Joey each put a peg into their warlock's chest.

_Two down. Three to go._

"Wait! My _other_ shoe's untied!"

DeStorm rolls her eyes, helps her tie her other shoe, and takes her up the stairs to the medical center. Or, rather, drags her. Tana's feet _refuse_ to move on their own.

"I'm having so much trouble walking up these stairs!" she complains, which earns her another eyeroll from DeStorm.

 

They're ten minutes into the game, and Liza's already out of breath. She's forced to slow down from a sprint to a light jog, and even _that's_ not enough to help her get her strength back.

"Tyler!" Joey shouts. "Keep looking!"

_Honey, I think I have asthma._

 

So far, the Confederates have yet to find a single peg, and Andrea's beginning to get a bit frustrated. They _have_ to get their act together and start finding pegs, because if they don't...if they don't...

_Keep looking._

"Look under rocks and everything!" Alex suggests.

Finally, Andrea chances upon a golden peg, stuck on top of a pillar. She has to stand on her tiptoes to reach it, but the rush of satisfaction she feels when she retrieves it is more than enough to make up for her aching feet.

"Do we have any pegs?" shouts DeStorm.

"No!" Alex yells back. "We can't find any!"

Andrea barrels her way back into Confederate territory. "I found one!" she screams. The peg is placed in their chest with a satisfying _plunk._ "I found it."

_Now we're getting somewhere._

"That was exhausting," Andrea sighs, dusting off her hands. "I'm out of shape."

 

This game of Capture the Flag is complete pandemonium to Tyler, mainly because there's also a _war_ going on at the same time. The Confederates and the Dark Army are running around, screaming, punching each other, even straight-up _killing_ each other with varying levels of brutality.

Tyler's just here to find the pegs. He doesn't need this mess.

"Oh!" Joey hisses, showing off the peg he found in a nearby tree. "I found it!"

Before Tyler has a chance to congratulate him, he's being chased around Confederate territory by a suspiciously ferocious DeStorm. Tyler's not very fast, and his thick red coat is _definitely_ slowing him down, but he's agile enough to avoid capture.

"Throw it!"

_"Throw it!"_

"Throw the peg!"

 _But I don't even_ have _a peg!_ thinks Tyler as he squirms his way out of DeStorm's clutches. DeStorm tries to get a grip on Tyler's armband, only to get a faceful of his coat, and Tyler can't help but chuckle. _He's twice my size, and he comes across as so much more athletic than I am, but he can't catch me._

As Andrea instructs her teammates to "look in trees and shit," Joey places their third red peg into the chest. Tyler grins.

 

This isn't fair. None of this is fair. Gabbie and her teammates are out here looking for pegs that are the color of _sticks_ on the _ground,_ while the pegs the Dark Army need to find are _bright red._ Of _course_ the Confederates are falling behind!

Alex's voice is a cheery yet indignant shout. "We can't find these pegs!"

Gabbie blinks. She _thinks_ she sees a peg, but that could just be a stick. Still, she wants to make sure, so she squints at it for a full five seconds before realizing that _oh, yeah, that's a peg._

Of course, once she realizes that, she picks it up, runs back to Confederate territory, and puts it in the chest. Now they have two pegs, while the Dark Army has three, and _hey, look at that, we're catching up. Maybe we can pull off this victory after all._

 

As Joey escorts Andrea to the medical center, Tana pulls Liza aside. "I need you to run."

Liza raises an eyebrow. "But I don't have one!" _What, do you expect me to be a decoy or something? I thought that was_ your _job!_

"No." Tana hands her a red peg. "I'm giving it to you."

"Oh." Liza immediately realizes Tana's plan. She takes the peg, whispers "okay," and stuffs it up her sleeve.

"Tana?" calls Joey.

The two girls run in opposite directions. As Liza sneaks the peg across the field, Tana runs out into the open and screams "Guys! I found the peg!" She is immediately captured by Alex for her trouble.

"DeStorm!" shouts Gabbie. "Trees and boxes!"

DeStorm snorts. "Trees and boxes, my ass! There ain't no trees and boxes!"

Liza's pretty sure that she doesn't have enough strength to run back to Dark Army territory with the peg, so she slips it to Tyler. "Here," she murmurs. "His name is Fred. Take good care of him."

"Omigod, my shoe's untied!" giggles Tana as Alex takes her to the medical center. "Oh, no!" She topples onto the ground.

"I got you," says Alex between giggles, helping her up.

Tyler puts Fred with his brothers and sisters, and Joey smiles. "One left," he gasps. "Keep looking!"

Alex is in a state of panic. "They only have one more!"

Liza's heart leaps. Their plan is working. They're _actually_ doing okay. If they keep this up, they'll—

Alex yanks off her armband.

_Dangit._

Well, she isn't going down without a fight, so she spends the walk to the medical center spitting on the ground and squirming like a little brown worm. Alex laughs again. It occurs to Liza that he hasn't laughed like this since Lauren's death.

 

"How many people are caught?" Tyler asks.

"Two!" Liza shouts from the medical center. Next to her, Tana bats her eyelashes at the remaining players.

 _Yep,_ sighs Gabbie, taking a moment to nurse her many bruises. _Those are my friends. They get to chill on the patio for five minutes, while the rest of us have to run around looking for a bunch of stupid pegs._ God, _I'm so tired! Can't I just give up?_

"My feet hurt," she moans.

Unfortunately for her, she's in Dark Army territory, and Joey happens to overhear her remark. "You wanna go sit up there?"

"Joey, please!" She tries to run away, but he grabs her around the waist. "Let me run just a little!"

"No! I've been running all day!"

He tackles her to the ground, but she puts up so much of a fight that the whole thing devolves into a wrestling match. "No!" she screams, trying her best to keep her armband out of his reach.

This is life or death. Of _course_ she can't give up. If they lose, she, DeStorm, Alex, and Andrea are in danger of being murdered. She doesn't particularly care about Andrea, and Alex is only okay, but she _can't_ let DeStorm die. He's her ally. And she sure as hell doesn't want to die herself.

They _have_ to win.

 

Alex has captured Tana for the umpteenth time, and he can tell that she's doing her best to slow him down.

"No!" He's trying to escort her to the medical center, but she has purposely devolved into a blob of jelly that can't move on its own. It's kind of hilarious. "No, don't go boneless on me! Don't you go boneless on me!"

She laughs. So does he.

As Alex picks Tana up and carries her the rest of the way to the medical center, he's grinning from ear to ear despite himself. _Maybe there's hope. I lost Lauren, yeah, but the rest of my friends are still alive. As long as I've got them..._

Then, once he's dropped Tana off, he remembers what kind of game they're playing, and despair overtakes his soul once more.

 

Just as Joey is about to go back into Confederate territory, he notices that there's a red peg inside a nearby lantern. He opens the lantern up, grabs the peg, and _there we go. Job done._

"Guys!" he shouts to his teammates. "I found it! I found the last one!"

"Yes, Joey!" Tyler cheers.

Joey dances his way to their warlock's chest. "Guys! I got it!"

"Wait!" shouts Tyler. "Put it in! We're gonna get a clue! Come on!"

Of course, Joey obliges. As soon as the last red peg is placed in its rightful spot, the chest pops open. Tyler pulls out a container of gunpowder and another note.

"Oh, wait." Tana frowns. "It's not over?"

"What does it say?" Joey asks.

Team Joey gathers around Tyler, who speed-reads the note aloud.

_The cannon on the patio has been authorized for your use. Soldier, pour in the powder and let her rip to reveal the enemy flag._

Liza blinks. "What?"

"Pour in the powder." Tyler's voice is breathless. "Come on!"

The four of them run to the patio. Liza orders them to "put your hands on the thing," while Tyler pours the gunpowder into the cannon. That done, the team prepares to fire the cannon.

"Teamwork makes the dream work!" Tana shouts.

"One!"

"Two!"

"Three!"

_"Fire!"_

The shot almost destroys the fountain. Water flies everywhere, and several benches are flung backwards by the impact. Joey cheers. If this wanton destruction means safety for him and his friends, he couldn't care less about the property damage.

"It's over!" yells Alex from below.

DeStorm grimaces. "They won."

"Jasper!" barks the Dark Army's general. "Do you see it?"

One of the Dark soldiers fishes around in the fountain for a few seconds. When he comes up, he has a white flag in his victorious fist. "Got it!"

The entire Dark Army, including Team Joey, rejoices. Joey takes a moment to catch his breath and process what just happened. _We're free._ He grins. _I'm not gonna die, and neither are Liza, Tyler, or Tana. Just this once, we managed to do the impossible._

_We saved each other._

"Guys!" squeals Tana. "We did it!"

Liza jumps up and down like an overenthusiastic kangaroo. "We're safe!"

Joey joins his teammates in a triumphant group hug, and he feels happier than he's felt in months. He wants this celebration to last forever.

 

DeStorm lost. He admits it. He and his team just couldn't find the pegs _(trees and boxes, my ass!)_ , and now, one of them is gonna pay for it.

"Those pegs were the color of the _ground,"_ Gabbie sighs, her voice too quiet for anyone except DeStorm to hear. "DeStorm, did you _see_ that shit? Like, was that real life?"

"Doesn't matter," he insists. "We're gonna be okay. We're invincible, remember?"

She squeezes his hand. "I hope you're right."

Joey and his motley crew come down from the patio to face Cash. "We won," says Joey. "Can we have the gem?"

Cash shakes his head. "Now, I said one of you losers is gonna have to die if you still want this," he sneers, gesturing to the gem on his chest. "Well, that ain't changed. Two people will have a little showdown. You have to vote."

"Guys, let's step inside," Joey suggests.

They file into the house. "Follow Alison," mutters Liza. "Per usual."

DeStorm is the last to step inside, unable to get rid of the lump of dread in his chest. He _knows_ he'll be fine, because he's the king of the house and nothing can touch him, but... _not Gabbie. Please, not Gabbie. She's the only one who believes in me. If I lose her, it'll be me against everyone, and I can't let that happen._

But someone _has_ to die tonight. Someone from his group.

_In that case..._

He smiles a cold, cruel smile.

_Alex Wassabi, I'm 'bout to send you straight to your goddamn grave._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Time to vote! Four are safe, but four lives remain on the line. Who will be chosen? Also, Alex does something absolutely insane.


	22. Showdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The game is over. The lives of DeStorm, Gabbie, Andrea, and Alex are up for grabs. But, when you think about it, there's only one way this can end...

Alex lost. He's still in danger. It's him, Gabbie, Andrea, or DeStorm. If he was smart, he'd be shaking in his shoes, begging fate to keep him alive for at least another hour.

But he's not scared. In fact, he's overjoyed.

"I am tired," Joey sighs as he slumps into one of the couches in the parlor.

"I know," replies Tyler. "But we live another day."

 _It's time._ Alex smiles. _DeStorm is going to pay for what he's done to Lauren. If my plan works, he's going to die, and her soul will finally be able to rest in peace._

He stands up. "If you wanna go," he says in a strong voice, making direct eye contact with DeStorm, "we can go head to head. I've been waiting for this."

 

Joey's mouth widens into a dumbstruck O. He can't believe what he's hearing. Alex Wassabi has volunteered himself to potentially _die,_ just for a chance at bringing DeStorm down.

"Oh, my," is all that the shocked Savant can say.

 

"He had the biggest hand in killing Lauren," Alex snarls.

DeStorm shrugs. "Cause his girlfriend deserved to die."

Gabbie clenches her fists. _DeStorm didn't kill Lauren!_ she wants to scream at Alex. _He beat her in a challenge that both of them were forced into, and you're over here acting like he threw her at the vampires while laughing like a maniac. He shouldn't be blamed for Lauren's death!_

Before she has the chance to defend her ally, Joey brings the argument to a close. "We'll do DeStorm. You guys do Alex. Settled."

"Shall we?" DeStorm sneers.

Alex doesn't even blink. "Go first."

 _No._ Gabbie wears a plastic smile, but her heart is breaking down. _I don't want this. I can't lose him. He gives me the strength I need to face this awful house. We're allies. We're invincible. He promised._

It's been decided. All she can do is hope that DeStorm defies death yet again.

 

DeStorm's not scared. He's going to live. He knows this like he knows the back of his hand. He's _DeStorm Power._ Nothing in this world can bring him down.

And Alex...he's too kind. Too soft. Too willing to put others before himself. He doesn't have what it takes to survive this game of life and death.

Really, DeStorm is doing him a favor.

He gives a Novelist card to Alison. As he heads back to his seat, he can feel the group's furious gaze boring into the back of his head. They still hate him. Everyone here, except for Gabbie, hates him. He doesn't care. He doesn't care. He _doesn't goddamn care._

He doesn't even blink when Liza attempts to give Alison the entire pile of Railroad Tycoon cards. Or when Tana almost steps on his foot on her way back to her seat. Or when Tyler's frightened eyes do their best to avoid his glare.

But when Gabbie returns from voting and takes the seat next to him, he notices. And he smiles.

"DeStorm."

When Alison calls his name, he doesn't feel the rush of betrayal that he felt the first time he was thrown into a challenge. Instead, he takes a deep breath, murmurs "I love this," and reminds himself that he's going to be all right. He's cheated death twice. He'll do it again. They'll know that he is king.

 

"And Alex."

Alex looks DeStorm square in the eye. _You're going down,_ he almost growls, but he keeps it to himself. After all, despite his wish for vengeance, he doesn't really know how this showdown is going to end. Heck, he could've just signed his own death certificate.

(Of course, dying isn't a bad thing for him, given the circumstances.)

His enemy has no such fears. "You're gonna join your girlfriend."

 _"Damn,"_ breathes Joey.

Tyler tugs on his collar, anxiety stamped across his expression. "That was shady as hell."

Alex doesn't care. As far as he's concerned, this matchup is a win-win situation. If he wins, DeStorm will die, and Lauren will be avenged. And if he loses, _he'll_ be the one to die, and he'll see Lauren again. Either way, he's happy.

 

"Right this way," says Alison, gesturing to the door. "Everyone, follow me."

 _Everyone?_ Tyler's face turns pale. _We have to_ watch _this one? That means...if DeStorm wins...Alex is going to die...right in front of me...and I won't be able to save him..._

His heart screams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: DeStorm and Alex fight to the death within the confines of a swimming pool. Who will emerge victorious and see their opponent slain?


	23. Vengeance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The matchup of the century! Will Alex avenge Lauren's death, or will DeStorm avenge his own dead reputation? Time to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas, everyone! Have some death!

The night feels so much colder now than it did ten minutes ago, and even Tyler's arm around Andrea's shoulders isn't enough to warm her. She wonders offhand if this has something to do with the fact that she's about to watch someone die.

"Well," chortles Cash as Alex and DeStorm approach him, "look who it is. I figured it'd be you two lowlifes."

Neither combatant answers. Instead, they glare at each other.

Cash holds up the gem. "You want this, don't you?"

For a moment, Andrea lets herself hope that he'll just hand the gem over, and no one will have to die. But then, he shatters her hope by hurling the gem over the balcony.

"No!" shouts Alex. "Don't!"

Too late. The gem falls into the nearby swimming pool, and Andrea's stomach hurts. 

 

_"Really?"_

Gabbie rolls her eyes. Cash is an asshole. They went through all this trouble, he _said_ he was going to give them the damn gem, and then he threw it into the swimming pool. What a dick move.

"First person to get the gem out of the pool keeps it," the asshole explains. "The other's going to the firing squad."

Gabbie crosses her fingers.

 

DeStorm sighs. So they have to go into the pool to get the gem? It's _freezing_ out here!

But he's gonna do it.

Cash raises his gun. "On my mark."

Just before the gun goes off, DeStorm locks eyes with Gabbie, who wears a nervous smile on her face. _Don't worry, Gab._ He grins. _I got this. I'm not going anywhere._

_Bang!_

 

DeStorm and Alex take off running down the stairs and into the house. Meanwhile, Liza and the others peer over the ledge to get a closer look at the pool.

_"What?"_

"Omigod!"

"Are you _kidding_ me?"

"Shut up!"

Gems of every shape, size, and color are scattered all over the pool's floor. If Liza had to guess, she'd say that there are at _least_ a thousand gems in there. _This is gonna take a while,_ she thinks with a sigh. _We're gonna be here until I'm sixty-four._

"This is ridiculous," Tyler moans. "Something's happening after midnight, remember? We don't have any time—"

_Tyler. Stop. You're making it worse._

 

Alex stumbles down the hallway, trying to get his clothes off as quickly as possible so that he can start swimming. Before long, his coat, kerchief, socks, shoes, vest, and shirt are lying in a crumpled heap on the floor.

 _If I die,_ he wonders, _what's going to happen to my clothes?_

DeStorm's only managed to take his coat off so far. Before Alex leaves, he grabs a couch cushion and throws it right at his rival's snooty face. DeStorm catches the cushion, but he stumbles and falls in the process, which Alex is a bit too happy about.

Alex runs outside, grabs a pair of goggles from Cash, and dives into the deep end of the pool. All he can see are specks of colored light.

_I have to find the gem._

 

DeStorm, unlike Alex, walks into the shallow end of the pool, because he's a classy man.

Almost as soon as he starts his search, he runs into a problem: his _goddamn_ goggles aren't working. They're old, Victorian goggles, so of _course_ they don't work like modern goggles, but he wasn't expecting things to be _this_ bad. _They could've given us some better goggles._

Luckily, Alex has the same problem. "The goggles keep filling up with water."

"Tighten them!" Joey suggests.

"Hold them to your face!" shouts Tana. "Hold them to your face!"

DeStorm takes off his goggles, dumps the water out of them, puts them back on, and keeps searching.

 

"DeStorm!" hollers Gabbie. "Hold the goggles to your face!"

"Don't help _DeStorm!"_ hisses Liza.

Joey frowns. "Don't help him!"

 _What's wrong with you?_ Gabbie glares daggers at the pair of them. _Of_ course _I'm gonna help DeStorm! I'm rooting for him! We're an alliance! We have each other's backs!_

 

This is hard. Even _without_ the goggles problem, there are too many gems for Alex to sort through. And his current approach—swimming around the bottom of the pool—isn't doing him any favors.

He surfaces, still empty-handed. "Can we get new goggles?"

"Just go down and scoop!" is Tyler's advice.

"Yeah!" agrees Joey. "Scoop!"

Alex sighs. "I know, but there's _hundreds_ of gems!"

"Well," says Tyler with a shrug, "you're not gonna get 'em by _not_ doing it."

"Just keep scooping!" Liza insists.

Alex's heart swells from all the support his friends are showing him. He wants to give each and every one of them a hug, starting with Tyler, but he knows that he has to focus on the task at hand. So he pulls himself out of the pool to get a better view.

 

Tyler's heart and Alex's life are _both_ on the line, so Tyler's going to do everything he can to guide Alex to victory. The trouble is, Alex doesn't seem to be listening to his "just scoop" suggestion.

"Alex, what's your strategy?" Liza wants to know.

"I have to look from up here," Alex explains. "I can't see it from down there. I can't get in."

Whereupon DeStorm splashes him.

"Hey!" snaps Joey. "Come on, DeStorm! That's cheating!"

Tyler shakes his head at DeStorm's pettiness. "Shady. Shady."

Alex keeps looking, and Tyler feels a combination of frustration and terror. _Come on, Alex. You're doing it wrong. Scoop up a little handful of gems, check to see if the gem's in there, and if it isn't, toss that handful to the side and take another one. Scoop and check. It's simple. Please. I want you to survive._

"You gotta scoop and check." And then, as if to drive that concept home, Tyler starts chant-rapping. "Scoop and check. Scoop and check."

Everyone else joins in. Even Alex and DeStorm dance along.

 _"Scoop and check. (That's right.)_  
_Scoop and check. (Okay.)_  
_Scoop and check. (Okay.)_  
_Scoop and check. (That's right.)_  
_Scoop and check. (Okay.)_  
_Scoop and check."_

Much to Tyler's relief, the song works. Alex gets back into the pool, puts his goggles on, and starts scooping and checking. "Yes!" cheers Liza. "Keep doing that!"

Tana's eyes light up with joy. "That's the best thing you've done!"

"Prince of scooping and checking!" Tyler exclaims.

"Yes!" yells Andrea. "My king!"

Now that Alex is on the right path, the rest is up to him. All Tyler can do is hope and pray that he won't have to watch his best friend die.

 

While DeStorm searches the shallow end, Alex is busy investigating the deep end. _It probably rolled down here,_ he thinks. _I'll know it when I see it. It's an amber-yellow-orange color. It's here...somewhere..._

Lauren's face floats across his mind.

_I'll avenge you. I promise._

"This is like finding a needle in a haystack," Joey remarks.

Liza beams at him. "Good analogy, Joey!"

Finally, after ten minutes of scooping and checking, Alex and DeStorm are each handed a pair of brand-new goggles. "Thank you," murmurs Alex to the soldier who gives him the goggles, hoping that this pair won't end up as waterlogged as the last one.

"Alex!" Liza screams from the balcony. "Go! Quick! DeStorm has them on!"

"Alex, be quick!" shouts Tyler.

Alex climbs out of the pool, takes a deep breath, and puts on the new goggles. They're a decent fit, but still not perfect.

Andrea's encouraging voice rings in his ears. "You go, boy!"

"Go quick!" shrieks Liza.

"Alex!" cries Tana. "Alex! He's under the water with the new goggles!"

Even _Joey_ is on his side. "Come on, Alex! We want you to win! You got this!"

Motivated by his friends' support and his own desire for justice, Alex jumps back into the pool and continues Tyler's suggested routine. _Scoop and check,_ he sings to himself. _Scoop and check. Scoop..._

 

DeStorm's sifted through a thousand gems already, and he _still_ hasn't found the one he's supposed to find. To be honest, he doesn't even remember what the damn gem looks like anymore.

_What color was it?_

He doesn't know. He wasn't paying attention to Cash. Cash isn't his type. He's tired of this. He wants to go home. He's _done._

No! No, he isn't done! He won't lose! He _can't_ lose! Losing means death, and he, DeStorm Power, is _not_ going to die. He'll never, _ever_ die. Even if he has to survive all by himself...

_"You're a cool guy. You deserve to stick around."_

Gabbie's words give him a surge of strength, and he doubles his gem-hunting efforts.

 

"Is Alex okay?" Joey frets.

Gabbie shrugs. "I think he's just, like, tired." Her voice sounds far away, and her eyes are glued to DeStorm's back. "Especially the up and down and up and down."

"And holding your breath," adds Tana.

Andrea bites her lip. "I mean, swimming's _exhausting,_ dude."

"Yeah, it really is." Honestly, Joey's scared for Alex's life. The Novelist is clearly running out of energy, and he's been under the water for quite some time. With any luck, he'll have the gem when he comes up, but Joey's beginning to prepare himself for the worst.

So, by the looks of it, is Tyler, who's currently drumming his fingers against the railing. There's a blank look in his sky-blue eyes.

Joey starts praying.

 

_Scoop...and check...scoop...scoop...and check..._

Alex is exhausted. Every muscle in his body is screaming _no, stop it, this is too much, I can't, I'm done, it's over._ He's tempted to give up. Death isn't so bad. Why not just let it happen?

 _No._ His jaw clenches. _I need to survive this. I need...I need..._

And then he sees it.

The gem that he's spent the past twenty minutes searching for is _there,_ sitting at the bottom of the pool, glowing with an almost ethereal light. Something about it reminds him of the way Lauren's eyes once shone, even though it's not quite the same color. He grabs it.

_This is for you, Lauren._

_I love you._

He resurfaces, the gem clenched within his victorious fist. "Got it!"

Everyone cheers.

 

As soon as Alex pops out of the water with the gem, it hits Gabbie: _DeStorm lost. DeStorm's dead._

"How do you know?" Tyler asks.

"Are you sure?" yells Tana.

Alex gets out of the pool and hands the gem to Cash. The Confederate's face is an unreadable mask. "The gem is yours."

More cheers.

"But holding on to it's gonna be a painful thing," Cash warns a tired yet triumphant Alex, handing him a brown pouch. Then, to his soldiers, "Time for the execution."

_Oh, God. Oh, no. Please...don't..._

DeStorm's voice is a defiant shout. "See you in hell!"

"The execution?" Joey gasps.

Gabbie's shoulders shake. The word "no!" escapes her mouth. Tears stain the corners of her eyes. _Not him. I can't...we're invincible...I thought we were invincible..._

"You!" Cash points at DeStorm, who's still in the pool. "Here, please."

"Omigod," breathes Andrea.

Tyler winces. "This is violent."

"No..." An hour ago, Gabbie saved DeStorm's life. Now, he's about to be executed, and there's nothing she can do to stop it. "Please...no..." _This can't be happening._ "I don't wanna see him die..."

 

DeStorm stands in front of the swimming pool, his goggles over his eyes, as a Dark Army warrior aims an arrow at his chest. _Third time wasn't the charm for me after all, huh?_ he chuckles. _How the mighty have fallen, and all that._ Next time, he really ought to tone down the arrogance.

Oh, wait. There won't _be_ a next time. He's about to die.

Well, he might as well do it right. No crying. No screaming. No begging for mercy. He's DeStorm Power, the Railroad Tycoon, and he's going to face death with all the defiant dignity that his role demands of him.

"Draw!"

And yet...he has regrets. A _lot_ of regrets. He wishes the house got to know him better. He wishes he hadn't been such an asshole. He wishes he'd been able to make more friends, instead of driving everyone away.

"And..."

 _We could've all gotten along._ As Tayvion flashes across his mind, DeStorm barely manages to keep his composure. _I just came for the party..._

"Fire!"

The world disappears in a blaze of green.

 

The Dark Army's arrow pierces DeStorm Power's chest, causing him to fall backwards into the swimming pool. By the time he hits the water, he's already dead.

"Ouch," Joey groans sympathetically.

Liza blinks. Her mind is having trouble processing what her eyes are showing her. It's one thing to watch someone walk out of a room and then get told _oh, yeah, they're dead, sorry._ But this is different. She just watched someone die. Even though it was DeStorm who snuffed it, she is _not_ okay.

Tana whimpers. Tyler's mouth hangs open. Andrea is frozen in shock. Gabbie looks like she's about to burst into tears.

"Oh, everyone, don't look so sad," Cash scoffs. "Y'all are trying to tangle with the Sorceress. This ain't the _least_ of what's coming your way."

With that, both the Confederates and the Dark Army march off into the night.

As the seven surviving YouTubers head back to the parlor, Liza presses her fingers against her temple in an effort to soothe her broken brain. _It's fine. It's fine._ She massages her forehead. _Yeah, it was terrifying to watch DeStorm get killed, but look on the bright side. At least you don't have to look at his beady little eyes anymore._

Somehow, that doesn't make her feel any better.

 

At long last, Alex has gotten his revenge on DeStorm, and it is _sweet._

He walks into the parlor, wearing nothing but his soggy pants and a towel, and everyone claps. Several people cheer. Alex feels like an athlete who's just single-handedly won the championship game for his team.

"Yes!"

"Alex!"

"Way to go!"

"You did it!"

"Honestly," says Joey, "you're my hero. Thank you."

 _Hey, Lauren,_ thinks Alex as he places the third gem into the gem map, _can you see me from wherever you are? Are you proud of me? I did it, Lauren. Just like I said I would._ He almost tears up. _I miss you...I miss you so much..._

"Five left." A smile darts across Andrea's face. "We're getting there, you guys."

As Alex idly rummages through his new pouch, his fingers touch what feels like a wrapper. "Wait. There's something else."

"What?" Liza asks.

Alex pulls it out of the pouch.

"Chocolate?"

"Chocolate?"

_"Chocolate?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP DeStorm. You were the most hated character in all of Escape the Night history, but I like to think that writing this story helped me understand you a little better.  
> Next chapter: The secret of the chocolate is revealed. Also, Liza struggles to deal with the fact that she just watched someone die, and Gabbie isn't hungry anymore.


	24. Sweets for the Sweet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DeStorm is dead. The seven surviving YouTubers must put aside their differences and investigate a suspicious piece of chocolate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! May 2018 be better.

"Guys," says Tyler, "we can talk about chocolate later." He turns to face Alex, trying not to blush. "Unless you _want_ to go shirtless for the rest of the night, you should go get changed. We'll wait for you."

Alex is still smiling. "Okay. Thanks."

He disappears down the hall.

Tyler leans back into the couch, trembling with relief. _Alex is alive._ He's still a bit traumatized from watching DeStorm die, but he knows in his heart that it could've been _so_ much worse. _He's not dead. He made it. That's all that matters._

Then, he notices the crestfallen look on Gabbie's face, and his soul aches with reluctant sympathy.

 

DeStorm's death plays over and over again in Gabbie's mind, like a perpetually looping Vine that she can't X out of. His calm expression...the flash of green...the way his body fell into the pool...

She wants to forget. She _needs_ to forget.

_"We're invincible, remember?"_

"Gabbie?" Tyler's voice breaks through her memories. "Are you okay?"

"Of _course_ she's not okay!" snaps Liza. "How could _anyone_ be okay after seeing something like that?"

In a fit of desolate determination, Gabbie grabs a couch cushion and hugs it close to her chest. "I'm _fine,"_ she growls through her teeth. _We were supposed to survive together. Now that he's gone, I'm going to survive for both of us._

_No matter what it takes._

 

Eventually, Alex returns in full Novelist array, and the group gathers around a table in the library. _We started with ten, and now we have seven,_ Tyler notices. _If this "life for a gem" pattern keeps up, five more people are going to have to die._

He hopes to God that he's not one of them.

"What just happened with DeStorm was absolutely insane," Joey remarks. "We just witnessed him die."

Liza wears a broken smile. "As much as I wanted him to die," she confesses, "I didn't want to _see_ him die."

"That's gonna keep happening unless we finish this," Andrea says matter-of-factly.

Tana, who's staring at a still-upset Gabbie with anxious eyes, speaks in a quiet voice. "We shouldn't want any of the other people to die."

 _"Everybody_ will die if we don't get out of here by dawn." As the words leave Tyler's mouth, a thought occurs to him. This whole time, they've been playing by the Sorceress's rules, and they've been dying anyway. They need to outsmart her. That way, they might have a chance at getting out of here without any more deaths.

 

"Okay." Liza's still reeling from DeStorm's death, which is weird, considering that she never liked the guy to begin with. _Whatever,_ her brain snaps at her heart. _Get over it. Time to move on._ "So we had vampires, we had spiders, we had Confederates, and now we have a candy bar." _A bit of a letdown, if you ask me._

"We just have to open this candy bar," says Gabbie, holding it up for the group to see.

 _Girl,_ Liza chuckles to herself, _you better share!_

 

The sight of the chocolate bar in her hands is enough to make Gabbie's stomach rumble. They've been trapped in here for _hours,_ and they haven't eaten _anything._ She's _hungry._ She would _love_ to have a bite.

She reads the wrapper aloud.

_A delicious, delectable chocolate bar. Smells like pure joy._

__

__

"I don't know..." mutters Tana as Gabbie unwraps the chocolate bar. "Do we _have_ to eat the chocolate bar? We don't know what's in it..."

Gabbie ignores her. She doesn't care. She's eating this chocolate if it's the last thing she does.

 

Honestly, Andrea agrees with Tana. It's dangerous to eat anything this house presents to them, especially considering all the deaths they've already endured. What if it's poisoned? They don't know. They don't know anything.

There's a yellow slip of paper with the chocolate. "Golden Ticket?" Liza asks.

Gabbie reads it.

_Once the children have spoken, devour me, and two paths will appear._

__

__

Liza's eyes nearly bulge out of her sockets. "There are _kids_ in this house?"

"Why are there..." Andrea blinks in surprise. "How many people are being held here?" She doesn't even _like_ kids that much. They freak her out. The last thing she needs is a bunch of pint-sized terrors to deal with on top of everything else.

"I don't wanna be killed by a toddler," Tyler whimpers.

Alex stands up. "Should we look for children?"

"I don't _want_ kids!" Tana complains.

As they look around the room, Liza holds her hand up to her forehead. "They're probably my height," she informs the group.

"Omigosh," sighs Alex. "Okay."

"Wait." Joey opens a door to reveal a painting. "There's children over here. Guys!"

Andrea shrugs. Whatever. Might as well track down some kids. Hopefully they won't be _too_ annoying.

 

In the portrait, two small children stand together, holding hands, giant grins on both their faces. Looking at them makes Alex a bit wistful for his own childhood innocence, but he brushes the thought aside and focuses on the clue. "Are those the kids we gotta find?" He examines the painting, and his brow furrows. "Wait. Is that a button?"

He presses it. A drawer pops open. There's nothing inside, but Alex knows that it _has_ to mean _something._

"It has to be something with this," he muses, turning his attention back to the chocolate bar.

Tana and Tyler look over his shoulder. "It says 'delectable chocolate...'" murmurs Tana. "'...smells like pure joy...'"

"It's definitely something to do with this!" says Andrea.

"Hey, children!" Joey claps his hands, as if that's going to draw the children out into the open. "Speak to us! Speak!"

Alex shakes his head at Joey's silliness.

 

Tana's not good with children, and she doesn't plan on _ever_ having any of her own. But on the other hand, knowing the evils this house holds, those kids could be trapped, just like the YouTubers. _They might need our help._

She picks up a strange, pink, stick-line object and sniffs it. It smells like chocolate kisses.

In fact, a chocolatey aroma permeates the entire room, as Joey points out. "It smells like chocolate, guys!"

"Does it?" asks Alex.

Everyone starts sniffing the wall. "It's not made out of chocolate," is Liza's quick disclaimer. "I licked it."

Tyler chuckles. "I'm gonna let y'all die."

 _Tyler!_ Tana knows that he's probably joking, but her danger senses are starting to tingle nonetheless. _You can't say things like that! That's not the kind of thing to joke about! Unless...unless you're serious..._

She searches the top shelves, and after a while, she finally sniffs out a clue. "I found a key!" She waves it over her head.

Shortly afterwards, Liza finds the lid of a treasure chest, and Joey pushes one of the couches aside to reveal the chest itself. "Oh!" shouts Alex. "A chest! Thank God! Who has the key?"

"Typical Joey," grunts Tyler.

Joey holds out his right hand. "Let me see the key."

Tana, of course, hands it over, and Joey opens the chest. Inside are a heck-ton of gumdrops, accompanied by a note.

_All children love gumdrops._

Tyler springs into action. "Give some of these gumdrops to those children!" he practically screams, grabbing a handful of gumdrops and heading straight for the open drawer. Everyone else follows his lead.

"Something's gonna happen," Tana reminds them. "Brace yourselves." She catches Alex eating some of the gumdrops, and she laughs in an effort to ignore her misgivings. "Alex, that's how you die."

Tyler shushes them.

"Get ready," says Liza.

Once all the gumdrops are in the drawer, Tyler closes it, and a child's voice echoes through the room. "Someone, please help us! Please! We've been locked in the gingerbread woman's oven, and she's going to cook us alive!"

Tana can't believe what she's hearing. _What_ is going on in this house? _Why_ are there _children_ in the _oven?_ Sure, she's not big on kids, but they're still _kids!_ They're _innocent!_ They don't deserve to be cooked alive in an oven! _No one_ does!

 

As soon as she hears the child's tiny voice begging for help, Liza goes into Mother Mode. She _has_ to save these kids! She _can't_ let them get baked by the "gingerbread woman," whoever the heck _she_ is!

"There's a spell on the door," explains the child, "and only children are allowed to enter the baking room. One of our friends is lost in the woods. If you find him, he'll be able to let you in to save us!"

"Okay!" Liza calls back. "We'll find him! Don't worry!"

The child keeps talking. "The gingerbread woman is looking for her lost meat pie recipe. Hurry! She'll be back in an hour to start the oven! Please! Help us!" 

"Hansel and Gretel," Alex remarks.

Tana is frantic. "She's gonna bake those kids alive!"

 _Not if I have anything to say about it,_ thinks Liza, crossing her arms defiantly.

"One group will go to the meat pies," says Joey. "The other will go find the boy."

Everyone agrees.

Joey shouts "We have to eat the chocolate!" and each YouTuber takes a piece. Liza scarfs hers down, savoring the rich taste, grateful for a chance to taste something sweet.

"Look for something to happen," says Alex.

"No," mumbles Tyler through a mouthful of candy. "You have to eat _all_ the chocolate."

As soon as all the chocolate is gone, another door opens, and they find two candy trails that have been laid out for them. One is accompanied by a sign that reads _To the Recipe,_ while the other's tag reads _To the Child._ This seems like a very odd combination of things, but Liza rolls with it.

"Okay!" yells Alex once everyone's had their chance to react to the candy trails. "Two paths!"

Liza marches towards the one marked _To the Recipe._ "I'm going down this one!"

"Alex! Tana!" Gabbie hollers. "Come with me!"

Alex, Tana, and Gabbie head down the path to the child, while Joey, Tyler, and Andrea join Liza on the path to the recipe. _This time,_ thinks Liza as they follow the candies. _This time, we'll outsmart her. This time, no one is going to die._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Gabbie, Alex, and Tana build a gingerbread house, while Joey, Liza, Tyler, and Andrea eat brains. It's not as weird as it sounds.


	25. Lunch Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One group searches for the missing recipe, while the other group must locate a lost child. But hey, at least there's food!

Tana, Alex, and Gabbie follow the path that's supposed to lead them to the child, and they find a room with a gingerbread house that has yet to be assembled. There are instructions, which Gabbie reads aloud.

_I am building an elaborate house made of gingerbread and candy. Once complete, open its door to find a treat._

__

__

"Okay!" Gabbie grabs the nearest slab of gingerbread. "Let's start building this house!"

Tana bites her lip. She hasn't built a gingerbread house in, like, ten years, so she doesn't know how well this is going to go. Knowing her, she'll probably screw up. But if it'll save those kids...

She gets to work.

 

Joey and Tyler keep eating candies from the candy trail, and even Andrea sneaks one into her mouth when she thinks that no one's looking. But not Liza. Liza's focused. She has a job to do. She's not about to let sweet treats distract her, no matter _how_ yummy they look.

The gumdrops lead them through the foyer and into the dining room, where it looks like a dinner party was supposed to happen. _Maybe the one I was invited to?_

"Look for a recipe," says Andrea.

Chocolates are scattered around the room. They're on the table, against the walls, and even on the floor. Clearly, this "gingerbread woman" they're dealing with has a bit of a thing for candy. _Her and Gabbie will probably get along great._

"Hold up." Tyler, who's still chewing a gumdrop, finds an empty chocolate box and a note.

_Please find my collection of chocolate confections and place them correctly in this box. I need a baker's dozen._

"That's thirteen," Tyler reminds them.

_Be sure to taste the proper treats to be led to the man whose brains you must eat._

__

__

_What?_ Liza gulps. She has to _eat_ a man's _brains?_ Chocolate is one thing. She likes chocolate. But _brains?!?_

"I'll eat brains," says Andrea with a shrug.

"I'll eat brains," Tyler agrees, "but let's get the chocolate first."

 _Sure. Okay. Whatever you say._ How _are you guys so_ calm _about this?_

 

Building a gingerbread house is a painful task for Alex. Not because he's no good at it (he's actually quite skilled), but because of all the times he and Lauren competed to see who could build the best gingerbread house. Clearly, memories of her are going to haunt him no matter what he does.

"Why is she _eating_ children?" Tana protests as they begin work on their gingerbread house. "Like, those kids are innocent kids!"

Alex shrugs. After four hours of terrible things, a cannibalistic "gingerbread woman" isn't enough to faze him. "The stories we heard when we were little are all true, and _some_ people like to cook kids."

 _"Great,_ Alex," is Tana's sarcastic reply.

"So far, we've been beating these lieutenants with complete brute force," muses Gabbie. "Is there any way we can outsmart them and get ahead of them? Cause it seems like they're always ten feet ahead of us."

Gabbie, for all her faults, just might be on to something. If they manage to outsmart a lieutenant, maybe the Sorceress will see that they're _not_ just pawns in her game. And then, if all goes well, they'll find the strength to take her out without losing anyone else to this awful place.

"Okay." Alex turns his attention back to the gingerbread house. "This side is...I feel like it's _gonna_ be secure, but we have to keep it _very_ still."

"Maybe if we put the lids on all at once, it'll kinda just like..." Gabbie makes a squishing sound.

Alex chuckles.

 

"Did we get one of these nipple ones?" Joey asks, picking up a "nipple one" and holding it up to his own nipple.

Tyler whistles.

"Yes, I got a nipple one," says Liza matter-of-factly.

Joey searches around for any chocolates they might have missed. As he searches one of the cabinets, he moves aside a decorated plate and finds the lid of the chocolate box. "Guys!" He picks it up and brings it over to the others. "I found the top of it."

"Perfect!" Tyler crows.

 

The top half of the box turns out to contain a map of where each chocolate belongs in the box. The problem is, all these chocolates look the same to Tyler. They're going to have to eat the chocolates if they want to find out their flavors.

_Maybe I shouldn't have eaten all those gumdrops on the way here._

Liza's already halfway through a chocolate. "I need to eat the whole thing to find out," she moans, placing the rest of it on the tip of her tongue.

As Tyler samples the chocolates, he can't help but notice that some of them kind of taste similar. _Is this blueberry? Blackberry? Raspberry? Cherry? At least I know it's a fruit._

"That doesn't look like blueberry," says Andrea to Joey.

"All right." Joey frowns. "But it's _blue."_

Liza holds up the chocolate she just bit into. "This could be molasses!" Then, upon closer inspection, "You know, this _is_ molasses! It just has blue dye on top to throw you off."

Thank God for Liza's clever taste buds. Tyler doesn't know what they'd do without her.

 

Gabbie's never been a fan of building gingerbread houses, because she tends to only do things that she is very good at. So, of course, this entire task is pushing her frustration levels to the limit.

"What is _this?"_ she wonders aloud, picking up a giant gingerbread rectangle.

"That goes right here," replies Alex, who's currently holding the gingerbread house together. "It holds these up. It goes...like...slanted."

She places it. "Like this?"

"No. Other way. Other way."

"This?"

"No, no. Across. I mean...uh...me to that side. Front to back."

At this point, Gabbie wants to bash the gingerbread against the nearest hard surface, but she grits her teeth and keeps working.

 

"This is raspberry cream," says Liza, pointing to the chocolate that currently occupies the "raspberry truffle" space. "This _has_ to be. So switch these two."

"Oh." She's probably right, so Joey switches them.

As soon as every chocolate is placed into the correct slot, a door pops open. The group finds another candy trail, which leads them out the door, up the stairs, and into a bedroom.

Joey's eyes widen. "Omigosh! A little girl's room!" The bedroom, which was clearly designed for a child, looks innocent on the surface, but Joey can't help but be reminded of a horror movie.

_Of course. I'm in a horror movie right now._

 

They're almost done with the gingerbread house, and Tana's glad of it. The sooner they get this done, the sooner they'll find the missing child...and the sooner they find the child, the sooner they'll be able to rescue those kids from the gingerbread woman's oven.

(And, hopefully, the sooner they rescue the kids, the sooner they'll get the gem.)

"Okay," says Alex, who's busy holding the gingerbread house together. "You guys decorate. I'll hold."

Gabbie starts placing the lollipops in their proper positions. "So three on the sides..."

"I'm almost done with that," Tana informs her.

A proud smile illuminates Gabbie's face. "Good job, Tana."

Tana smiles back. "Thank you, Gabbie." Despite the DeStorm fiasco, she still considers Gabbie one of her very best friends, and she's glad to know that Gabbie feels the same way about her. She can only hope that both of them (and everyone else, if possible) make it out of this awful house alive.

And so, the gingerbread house is completed. "Reach in there," Alex instructs Gabbie, who does just that. "There should be a treat inside." Then, after Gabbie comes up empty-handed, "Nothing?"

"Nothing," Gabbie confirms.

Nearby, a small box pops open, glowing with a purple light. "Wait!" gasps Alex. "That opened! Okay." He lets go of the gingerbread house. "I'm done holding this."

Their sweet creation collapses into a broken pile of gingerbread. Tana giggles despite herself.

Gabbie grabs a key from the open box. "We already got the key! Run!"

"Wait, wait, wait." As the three of them race for the door, Alex snatches up an unused bowl of candy and starts eating it. "Let's go!"

"Me," snickers Tana. "Alex is me." She takes a piece of candy as well.

"Guys, there's another candy trail!" shouts Alex, and the three YouTubers follow the path to the child once again.

 

As Tyler reads the note aloud, Andrea squints over his shoulder at its unsettling penmanship. The ink is red. Blood is _also_ red. She does not like the implication.

_I do love to surprise the children with things to eat. Especially things that make them gag. I particularly love brains._

Andrea blinks, grits her teeth, and points to the pile of packages in front of them. "I think we need to open these."

"Do you think these are _brains?"_ Tyler squeaks.

Of course they are. Andrea has spent the last twenty minutes mentally preparing herself to eat brains. It's a disgusting task, but hey, she _did_ drink vampire blood earlier. What does she have to lose?

 _Your life,_ whispers the darkest part of her brain.

She ignores it.

As they open the package, a green-faced Tyler won't stop whimpering "no, no, no" under his breath. Just as Andrea is beginning to consider letting him skip the brain feast, the final box is removed to reveal...a _head?!?_

Everyone screams.

Two seconds later, Andrea realizes that she is screaming at a head-shaped cake. She almost laughs. _This_ is what she has to face? Brains made out of sugar? She's grateful for the reprieve, but she's also oddly disappointed. 

"Okay," says Joey. "Well, it's a cake."

Tyler looks like a man who's just been spared from execution. "It's a cake!" he repeats, relief dancing across his features. "It's a cake. It's a cake. It's a cake."

"Do we just..." Joey asks.

Andrea finishes his sentence. "Dive in?"

They do. Together, they rip the head apart, revealing the squishy "brains" inside. Said "brains" are a strange sort of purple goo that oozes between Andrea's fingers like sugary slime.

"This is _gross,"_ complains Joey, making a face.

 _Not as gross as it could've been._ "Okay, guys. We have to eat it."

 

The candy trail leads Gabbie, Alex, and Tana outside, where they begin to look for the lost child. Gabbie shivers. It's _freezing_ out here. She's cold, she's tired, and she just wants to go home and drink some coffee.

"What are these?" Alex wonders aloud, staring at the golden stepping stones littered around the yard. "What does all this..."

 _"...mean?"_ Gabbie, Alex, and Tana say in chorus.

Alex hops up onto a nearby wall. "Wait...oh! There's more up here!" He examines his surroundings, and his eyes light up with understanding. "Oh! A chest!"

Gabbie and Tana follow his lead. As it turns out, the key that they found in the lounge unlocks the chest.

"There's no way a kid could fit in here," muses Alex.

Gabbie opens the chest, hoping to God that they're on the right track. "I'm sure a clue does."

Sure enough, the chest contains a bunch of candy and a note. "Oooh!" Alex exclaims. "Rock candy!"

_Nine pieces of candy must be placed on the golden stones to lure the lost child from the woods. Once all of them are placed, the child will appear to open the gingerbread room._

 

"It's actually not that bad," Joey remarks through a mouthful of brains.

Andrea nods. "It's not as bad as I thought it would be."

"It's not!" Liza licks her fingers. "It's making me question..." Maybe she should eat brains more often. Maybe she'll get smarter if she eats brains. Maybe she's a cake cannibal. What's a cake cannibal? She doesn't know.

While they're still stuffing their faces with brains, the cabinet behind them opens. "Knew it!" shouts Andrea. She races over to the cabinet and pulls out a gigantic book. "Oh...it's a _heavy_ book for one person."

 _The Most Delicious Recipes,_ screams the title.

Andrea's mouth drops open in a surprised sort of happiness. "This is the recipe book!"

"It is!" cheers Tyler.

It doesn't take them long to find the _"secret meat pie recipe, more valuable than a king's fortune."_ Liza silently reads the list of ingredients, and her heart drops into her stomach when she realizes that the recipe calls for a child. _There are children in this house,_ she remembers. _And if we don't save them, they're gonna become meat pies._

But that's not going to happen. They're _going_ to save the kids.

(She wonders if there's still a chance that no one else will die.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Our heroes come face to face with a sweet yet terrifying woman. Also, Alex adopts a child, Liza gets sassy, and Gabbie will do anything for food.


	26. The Gingerbread Woman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang's sugary quest _seems_ to be going well...until they encounter a sour obstacle.

Joey rips the meat pie recipe out of the cookbook, not caring in the slightest about the bits of parchment left behind. "Let's go."

"There's more candies to follow," Liza points out.

The group heads down the stairs. "We need to find these children," Joey reminds them, clutching the recipe between his fingers. He's nervous. The brain thing wasn't as bad as he thought it would be, but he _still_ doesn't know what lies ahead. What if something pops out and tries to kill them?

The candy trail leads them to a large wooden door. There's a sign on it.

_Only children are allowed to enter the baking room._

"So we need to wait for them to bring back the kid," says Liza.

She's right. Since none of them are children (Liza, at twenty-one, is the youngest of the four, but twenty-one is still a legal adult), they're stuck out here until Alex, Gabbie, and Tana come back with the lost child. Joey can only hope that they hurry.

 

As per the note's instructions, Alex, Tana, and Gabbie place candy on each of the stones. _"These_ stones," says Tana, pointing. "Right?"

"Wait." Alex wants to make sure that they didn't miss any stones, so he counts up all the ones they've covered so far. "One, two, three, four..."

"Is there one over there we're missing?" Gabbie wants to know.

Alex keeps counting. "...five, six, seven, eight...oh. There's one more."

"So there's one more stone," is Tana's quiet reply. "We gotta look for it."

They continue their search. "There has to be one hidden in the bushes that we don't see," remarks Alex. He ignores his tired muscles and keeps an eye out for the stone they have yet to find.

"None over here," calls Gabbie from a nearby clump of bushes, "but I'm guessing that—"

That's when Alex sees it. "Oh! Here!" He pushes aside the now-empty chest to reveal the final stone.

"Wait..." Gabbie turns around, sees Alex's discovery, and shakes her head. "Oh, you son of a bitch!"

Alex ignores her. He puts the rest of the gumdrops on the stone. "Okay, that's nine."

"Is that candy?" A new voice echoes through the garden, and a young boy appears from behind a bush. "Wow." A smile lights up his pale face. "There's so many."

"There he is!" shouts Gabbie. "Go!"

They approach the child.

"Hi!" chirps Tana.

The boy's smile disappears. "Who are you?"

"We're here to save you," Alex lets him know.

"We have more," adds Tana. "We have more."

"I..." The boy tries his best to look tough, but fear flickers across his brown eyes. "I'm not going to share my candy if that's what you want," he snaps at the YouTubers in a defiant yet trembling voice. "I found it."

"No, no, no!" exclaims Alex, resisting the urge to give the boy a hug. "You can have it! We need your help to find your friends."

At the mention of his lost friends, the boy's smile returns. "Yeah. Okay. Come on!"

He takes off running.

"Let's call him Pepito!" suggests Alex as he grabs his coat. "Pepito! Wait!"

"He can _run,"_ gasps Tana.

As the three YouTubers follow Pepito to the baking room, Alex realizes that _oh, crap, I've already gone and gotten attached to this kid._ But it's okay. He'll keep Pepito safe. He won't let anything happen to him.

_That's what you said about—_

Alex slaps his forehead in an effort to shut his brain up.

 

After five minutes of Liza being bored out of her mind, a little boy in brown overalls races into view. Alex, Gabbie, and Tana are hot on his heels.

"Guys!" Tyler's voice sounds as relieved as Liza feels. "You got the kid!"

"Hi!" says Liza to the kid in her best don't-be-scared-I'm-your-friend voice.

Andrea looks a bit worried. "Who _is_ he?"

"He's here to help us," Alex assures them. "This is Pepito."

Pepito, huh? He's so cute! He looks tasty. Wait, no. Liza shouldn't think that. You're not supposed to think that about kids, especially kids you're trying to save from cannibals. He looks really adorable. There. That's better.

"You want me to open the door?" Pepito asks.

Alex nods. "Can you let us in?" Something in his voice tells Liza that he's already prepared the adoption papers. She doesn't blame him.

"Okay," says Pepito, and he opens the door.

 

Inside the gingerbread room is a scrawny little man in a brown apron. He is surrounded by _hundreds_ of cupcakes, cookies, candies, and other sweet treats, but Tana is too terrified to eat any of them.

"H-h-how did you all get in here?" stutters the man. "I mean, only children are allowed in the baking room."

"We were let in by a child," explains Gabbie.

"We _are_ children," Tana insists. She just turned nineteen a few months ago, and she _still_ can't legally drink yet, so that makes her a child. As far as she's concerned, she should've been allowed into the baking room on her own.

Alison pulls Pepito aside. "It's time for you to go home now."

"But I just got here!" complains Pepito.

"Go!"

Pepito leaves. Alex screams _"Pepito!"_ at his retreating figure, then turns back to the rest of the group with a heartbroken look on his face. "He's gone."

"He's gone," sighs Tana. She can only hope that Pepito makes it home. If he gets hurt...or worse...

She smothers the thought.

 

"Do you know anything about the children?" Alex asks the man.

Joey doesn't wait for a response. "There's children in the oven!" he cries, gesturing to an iron door that can only be the entrance to the oven. "Guys!"

Alex opens the door. Out pop two children, a boy and a girl, prompting a chorus of "omigods" from the group.

"You saved us!" squeals the little girl. "Thank you so much!"

"Get out of here!" yells Tyler. "Go!"

The children don't need to be told twice. They flee the baking room faster than a pair of tiny racecars. _Thank God,_ thinks Joey as he watches them go. _At least we saved the kids._

 

Andrea shakes her head in bemusement. _I'm trying to save_ myself. _Shit._

"Who _are_ they?" Tana asks in anxious tones. "Why were _they_ here?"

The little man is too shy to make eye contact with the YouTubers. "Well...it's what the gingerbread lady does."

"Wait!" Liza points at the man. "Look at his neck! He has a rock!"

Andrea looks. There's a pink gem hanging around the man's neck. _The_ gem. _We need it. We have to get it. Quick. Before we're forced into another deadly challenge._

Everyone starts talking at once.

"Oh! A gem!"

"You have the gem!"

"We _need_ that!"

The man looks confused. "What?"

"We need your necklace," says Liza.

"We'll give you _anything,"_ promises Alex.

"But t-t-the gingerbread woman gave it to me," the man whimpers, "and i-if I give it away, she'll...she'll hurt me..."

Joey shakes his head. "No. It's fine."

"We'll protect you!" offers Alex.

But the man still seems reluctant to give the group the gem, and Andrea can't help but feel sorry for him. The gingerbread woman sounds _awful._ Between her love of meat pies made out of children, her alliance with the Sorceress, and her apparent ability to terrify a grown man, she is someone that Andrea doesn't want anything to do with.

 

"We have this recipe," says Tyler, holding up the meat pie recipe. Maybe they can use the recipe as leverage to get the gem. _Anything_ to prevent another death.

"That's her secret meat pie recipe," gasps the man. "That's worth a fortune!"

"We'll trade you!" several people shout at once.

"Yes..." The man bites his nails. He still looks terrified, but there's also a glimmer of hope on his face. "Yes, that could be my way out..." He takes a deep breath. "Put it down."

 _"You_ put it down!" Tana shoots back.

The man gulps. He reminds Tyler of a child who's been through one too many abusive homes. Tyler wants to help him, to get him far away from this awful house, but at this point, he needs to focus on keeping himself and his friends alive. There's nothing he can do for this man right now.

_Maybe...once we save ourselves...we can go back and save him..._

Tyler puts the recipe on the table.

"Leave this here," says Joey to Tana, taking a meat cleaver out of her hand. "I don't trust you with that." He places it next to the recipe.

The man eyes the recipe with nervous eyes. "Why should I trust you?"

"Why should we trust _you?"_ is Liza's quick reply.

Tyler shrugs. "She's got a point."

"I mean, you're a prisoner," says Tana. "We're prisoners."

Their new acquaintance considers this logic and reaches for the gem. _We did it,_ thinks Tyler. _We're about to get a gem, and we didn't even need to sacrifice anyone to get it. Maybe there's hope for us after all._

Those hopes are promptly dashed when the gingerbread woman walks through the door.

 

The gingerbread woman (at least, Gabbie _assumes_ that she's the gingerbread woman, because who the hell _else_ would she be?) is a chubby woman with a round face, a saggy chin, a tall red hairdo, and eyes the color of chocolate. She wears a pink blouse and a blue skirt, and she carries a tray of hot cocoa.

She looks more like a mother than a villain.

"Oh!" She giggles. "Do we have guests?"

"No," Tana replies.

The gingerbread woman doesn't appear to have heard her. "Well, it's a good thing I just whipped up a nice batch of hot cocoa. Please have one!"

"Okay," says Alex, taking one.

"No!" cries Liza. "Alex!"

"Don't drink that," Tyler moans.

"It's a new blend I'm working on for the Duke of the North," says the gingerbread woman in a sweet voice.

"I'm gonna sip it," Alex decides.

On one hand, Liza and Tyler have a point. This stuff could be poisoned. But it looks so good! And Gabbie's still so hungry! Fighting evil spirits can take a _lot_ out of a girl.

"Here, sweetie." The gingerbread woman hands Gabbie a cupcake. "This is for you."

Gabbie takes the cupcake. "Thank you." You know what? Screw it. If she's going to die here, she might as well go out with a cupcake. It's certainly better than getting shot, or eaten alive, or baked in a goddamn oven.

It's at this point that the gingerbread woman notices the recipe, which Tyler once again has in his hand. "That looks like my secret recipe for meat pie."

"I'm simply carrying a piece of paper," Tyler protests.

But it's too late. "Where did you get it?" the gingerbread woman demands to know, her voice hardening into something dangerous. Then, as if someone has flipped a switch, rage twists her face, and she snarls the word _"you"_ at the man with the gem.

 _Oh, shit._ "No! It wasn't his fault!" Gabbie should've seen this coming. Of _course_ this sweet, motherly lady who gave them cupcakes and cocoa is actually a psychopathic bitch. She's a _cannibal,_ for crying out loud.

The man begins to stutter excuses, his whole body shaking with fear, as the gingerbread woman stomps towards him.

Alex moves to defend him. "It wasn't him! It wasn't him!"

"He didn't do anything!" pleads Liza.

"You _betrayed_ me," growls the gingerbread woman, ignoring the YouTubers' objections. "I took you in when your parents put you out on the streets!" She tosses aside the remains of a cupcake she was eating, snatches up the meat cleaver, grabs the man's hand, and forces it onto a nearby chopping board. Then, as the group watches in horror, she chops his fingers off.

Everyone screams. Blood and bits of finger fly everywhere. Gabbie want to go hide in the nearest cupboard and never come out again. _What is happening? Why is this happening? He didn't do anything wrong!_ "His finger's falling off...his finger's falling off..." _Is that going to happen to us?_

 

As the poor little man doubles over in pain, clutching the bloody remains of his fingerless hand, the gingerbread woman turns her attention back to the YouTubers. "Give me the recipe! Now!"

"No!" Liza yells back. "Give _us—"_

"I..." Tyler clutches the recipe to his chest, trying his best to keep his voice calm, but it's hard for him to stay brave after what he just witnessed. "Here's the deal. You have something we want."

"One..." The gingerbread woman advances on Tyler, her meat cleaver at the ready. "Two..."

Tana gasps. "Tyler! She's counting!"

 _Don't give it to her._ Tyler's heart is going a thousand miles a second. _Not until she gives us the gem. Be brave, Tyler. Be strong._

"Three." The cleaver is too close for comfort. "I need the recipe. Please."

"You ain't my mama!" Liza blurts out.

Tyler's courage fails him, and he realizes that he likes his fingers, so he lets the gingerbread woman grab the recipe out of his hand. "Thank you," she sneers with a sickening smile.

"I feel like she was gonna do something," Tyler squeaks.

"You tried to steal my recipe!" the gingerbread woman screams at the group.

"No!" snaps Alex through a mouthful of donut.

"Your punishment," their new foe continues, "is that you will go out and vote...and bring me back two pieces of meat."

Alex spits out the donut. _"What?"_

Tana slaps the half-eaten donut out of Alex's hand. It rolls across the floor, where Gabbie picks it up and takes a bite out of it. Andrea steals the donut from Gabbie when she isn't looking.

"And _I_ will decide which one of you lives and which one of you will be eaten in my next pie," snickers the gingerbread woman.

Tyler sighs. "Do you _gotta_ do that?" _This is all my fault. If I had put up more of a fight, we might have gotten the gem. Now, two of us are gonna go through a challenge, and someone's gonna die, and none of this would be happening if I wasn't such a wimp._

"Go!" hollers the gingerbread woman, waving her cleaver in the air. "Now!"

The group flees the baking room. "Okay," grumbles Tyler, still cursing himself for his cowardice. "I don't like her."

"That was a good donut, though," is all Andrea has to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Voting time! The group is forced once again to pick two people to participate in a not-so-sweet competition. Also, Tana has a lollipop, Tyler screams internally, Liza channels Caesar, and Alex questions Joey's hair.


	27. Conflicts of Interest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gingerbread woman wants two "pieces of meat." Who will be chosen?

They're back in the parlor, ready to play another voting game, but Tana's still unable to accept what just happened. _That gingerbread woman..._ She clenches her fists. _She chopped off a man's fingers. She almost hurt Tyler. She cooks innocent children in her oven. I want her dead._

"That poor little man was just sitting there, getting ready to bake!" Liza cries.

Gabbie frowns. "She said she rescued him as a child, and now he's, like, a prisoner."

"She didn't _rescue_ him," scoffs Andrea. "She swiped him up."

"Think about how long he's been there, though," Tana points out. "Think about how long _we_ could be here." She shudders. She doesn't want to spend the rest of her life in this awful, bloodthirsty house. She can't believe there was _ever_ a time when she loved it here. She wants to go home. And she wants to go home without being forced to endure any more deaths.

But that's impossible. Someone has to die.

_Please...God...let me live...just a little longer..._

 

Alex glances around the room. Tyler...Tana...Liza...Gabbie...Andrea...even Joey...none of them deserve to get baked in a pie. They're good people. He can't stand the thought of losing another friend to this terrible place.

"Whatever's in there is probably food," says Tyler. "Eating, eating, eating. And _we..."_ He gestures to himself, Andrea, Joey, and Liza. "...just went through chocolate and chocolate and chocolate."

Liza nods. "We went through _so_ much."

"We ate _brains,"_ Andrea concurs.

"I'm willing to go in there and fight," says Alex matter-of-factly, "because I don't want any of you to die." He killed DeStorm. He avenged Lauren. He did what he set out to do. Maybe it'll be better if he takes one for the team. After all, what else is left for him here?

 _But Lauren wouldn't want that,_ whispers his conscience. _Lauren would want you to live._

He doesn't know. He can't decide if he wants to live or die. All he knows is that he wants the pain to stop.

 

 _Alex,_ thinks Liza, _I know you're still upset about Lauren, but for the love of God, stop volunteering yourself for challenges! Do you_ want _to get murdered?_

"But Alex," Tana protests, "you've already _fought_ a challenge! You fought a challenge, Gabbie fought a challenge, I fought a challenge..."

"I feel like _Liza_ could handle it."

The words hit Liza's ears like punches. _Joey?_ What is _this_ about? Why is _Joey Graceffa,_ of all people, throwing her under the bus? He was her friend. They had a great time. They were _such_ a good team. And now he wants to send her to her death? Did their time in the ballroom mean _nothing_ to him? _Joey! Why? Why do you want me gone?!?_

Her heart is breaking, and no one seems to care.

 

Joey loves Liza. She's a positive, hilarious, wonderful person, and if he wasn't gay, he'd _totally_ have a crush on her. He wants her to live. He wants her to get out of this house and find her way back to 2017.

This, to him, is the best way to protect her.

It's a _food_ challenge. She'll be _fine._ She _has_ to go in at _some_ point, so why not send her into the easiest challenge they've encountered so far? She'll come out alive, and then she'll never have to go into another challenge ever again.

Everyone breaks off into groups, and Joey immediately finds himself being lectured by Tana Mongeau. "You're like, 'I did this, I did this.'" Her voice is soft and harsh at the same time. "At the end of the day, you haven't competed yet."

"If it came down to someone who hasn't done it," Joey replies, "I don't want it to be me." Yeah, it's an easy challenge, but he's _full!_ Let him rest! Let him have a nap! Also, that gingerbread woman is terrifying, and he doesn't want to touch her with a ten-foot pole.

 

Gabbie isn't sure who to vote for. If she's going by her "take out the one who's done the least" standards from earlier, then she should probably go for Tana, but...she doesn't _want_ to. Tana can't fight. She wouldn't last a _second_ in a proper death challenge, _especially_ considering her performance in the spider race. If _(when)_ Gabbie gets to the end, she'd rather go up against _her_ than anyone else, so she's going to keep her around for as long as she can.

(Of course, the fact that they're friends doesn't hurt.)

She joins Alex, Andrea, Liza, and Tyler in the corner of the room. "I can take Joey out," Alex offers through a mouthful of candy. "If you guys want me to take him out, I can take him out."

"I mean, he _did_ invite us to this ball," Liza hisses, making air quotes around the word "ball."

"And his hair is always perfectly coiffed," remarks Alex.

Tyler raises an eyebrow. "That's a good point."

_"How?"_

"Yes!"

Alex throws his candy wrapper on the floor. "I won't stand for this."

"What is going on?" asks a very confused Andrea.

 _Hell if I know,_ thinks Gabbie, _but I guess we're voting for Joey? Is that what we're doing? Okay. I'm down with that._

 

"All right, it's time to vote," announces Alison. "Please come up one by one, as usual."

Andrea votes. Then Tyler. Then, it's Liza's turn, and the Explorer is still seething from the injustice done to her. _I've been so helpful this entire time,_ she fumes as she stomps to the table with her nose in the air. _I've been exploring this home that I thought was Joey's but isn't. I've found so much. I've done everything right. Joey doesn't deserve me. He's the reason why we're all here and why all of our lives are at stake._

She grabs a Savant card and thrusts it at Alison.

_Screw you, Joey Graceffa. That's what you get for breaking my heart._

 

As she watches her friends vote, Tana licks a lollipop that she stole from the baking room. _Joey, Tyler, Liza, and Andrea haven't gone in yet,_ she reminds herself. _We need to pick two of those four._

It's her turn.

She's _not_ voting for Liza, no matter _what_ Joey has to say about it. But she's not voting for Joey either, because she still loves him, and Andrea technically risked her life already with the vampire thing.

So she murmurs a quiet apology to Tyler and casts her vote.

 

After the last person (Joey) votes, the moment of truth arrives. "Here we go," says Alex. "Here we go."

 _Here we go, indeed._ This is the fourth time Tyler's gone through this, and he _still_ hasn't gotten used to the terror that accompanies the end of Voting Time. _You'll be fine,_ he tells his frazzled brain. _You're gonna be okay. You're not going in there. You're not going to die._

"Tyler."

The world shrieks to a halt. Tyler sucks in a shaky breath, the sound of his name echoing like a death knell in his mind. _What?_ Scorching fear clouds his vision. _Who voted for me? My name wasn't even on the table! Why...oh, God, it doesn't matter, I got picked, I'm going to die, I'm going to get baked into the gingerbread woman's meat pie..._

 

Liza barely has time to react to Tyler's plight before the second name is chosen.

"Liza."

 _"Whoa!"_ gasps Alex. "I did _not_ see _either_ of those coming!"

Liza's hands fly to her mouth. _Who? Are you sure?_ A part of her was expecting this, thanks to Joey's betrayal, but she still feels like a prisoner who's just been sentenced to the chair. _Is there another little brown girl in the room that can go?_

"The votes have been cast," says Alison. "There's no way to change it. Tyler, Liza, follow me."

Liza pulls herself to her feet and takes Tyler's trembling hand. _It's all right._ She fakes a smile. _It ain't over till it's over. And till it's over, I'm gonna do my best to get out of that baking room in one piece. I'm not gonna die just cause Joey Graceffa says I should._

 

Tyler Oakley and Liza Koshy walk, hand-in-hand, towards the door, and Tana can barely bring herself to look at them. _One of them is going to die._ She struggles to hold back tears. _Liza...I tried_ so _hard to protect her, but I failed. And Tyler...oh, God...Tyler..._

For the third time tonight, she regrets her vote.

"Guys." There's hope in Gabbie's voice. "Fight for your life. You might be able to _both_ come back alive. It's a possibility! Don't accept death!"

Alex wears a broken expression on his face, but his tone is still as encouraging as it's always been. "Remember, this is the only way out!"

"You got this!" shouts Andrea.

"If I don't come back," Liza calls over her shoulder as Tyler leads her out of the room, "it was sweet living with you all."

Tana chuckles. "It was _sweet."_ Leave it to Liza to go out with one last pun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Tyler and Liza engage in an eating contest where death is on the menu. Or is it?


	28. The Loophole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does the gingerbread woman's kitchen spell the end for Liza and/or Tyler? Or is there another way out?

As they walk down the hallway, Liza clings to Tyler's hand like a life preserver, struggling to slow her heartbeat down to a manageable speed. She still doesn't understand why Joey handed her over to the mercy of the gingerbread woman, but it doesn't matter. She _has_ to live. There's still _so_ much she wants to do with her life, and she's _not_ going to let this house kill her. Not now. Not ever.

Tyler's pulse flickers between her fingers. She misses him already.

"Just so you know," says Alison as they approach the baking room, "the gingerbread woman's servant...his name is Sampson. He's been with her for as long as I can remember." She smiles. "I think he might be able to help you."

 _Sampson._ Liza can still see the pain in his big brown eyes. _I'm sorry. If it hadn't been for us, you'd probably still have your fingers._ Come to think of it, maybe there's a way for her to make it up to him...once she survives this challenge, that is.

 _If_ she survives this challenge...

No. Not if. _When._

 

_"Don't accept death."_

Gabbie's words ring in Tyler's ears, and he uses them to block out the constant stream of terror from his brain. He's _not_ going to die. He'll _live._ He'll see tomorrow. He can't afford to entertain the awful alternative.

They reenter the bakery. There are more sweets than before—cupcakes, chocolates, candies, cookies, donuts, and who knows what else. At the center of it all sits Sampson, still nursing what's left of his hand. He gives Tyler and Liza a piece of paper.

"Is this for us?" Tyler asks.

Sampson nods.

If this battle has _anything_ to do with sweets, Tyler's gonna puke. He already overdid it on all those chocolates (and _brains!_ ) from earlier. He's pretty sure that his stomach can't handle any more sweets.

_Choose a side, then eat and swallow everything red until you are given your next instruction. The first to complete all three instructions lives. Set the baking timer to thirty minutes and be finished before it rings or no one gets out._

"So we could _both_ die?" Tyler gulps.

Liza frowns. "Yeah."

Sampson sets the timer. Tyler turns to face Liza, and he knows that this is his only chance to say goodbye to her. In a few moments, they will be rivals, fighting to survive, and their friendship will become another sacrifice on the altar of this house.

"Love you, sweet pie," she murmurs.

He kisses her hand. "Sis..." _I love you too, Liza. I wish I could save you. I wish there was a way for us both to live._

She takes his still-trembling hand and kisses it in return.

 

The timer starts.

"Oh, God." Tyler's blue eyes widen. "It's happening!"

Liza barrels her way across her side of the room, repeating the word "red" like her own personal mantra. She grabs a donut with red frosting and stuffs it into her mouth. "I love this challenge."

"I don't know what's red," grumbles Tyler from the other side of the room.

Well, that's okay, because _Liza_ knows what's red, and that's all that matters to her. Anything red that she can find in the room goes straight into her mouth. _This isn't so bad,_ she thinks to herself, enjoying the delicious taste of candy and cake. _I can do this. There's nothing scary about sweet stuff...except maybe for the extra calories, but I can burn those off later._

"Do I eat your hand?" she asks Sampson, pointing to his bloody hand.

"No," Sampson whimpers. "Only food."

Tyler glares at a half-eaten donut. "I hope what I ate was red. Is this red?"

"That's pink," replies Sampson.

"That's _pink!"_ Tyler groans. _"Ugh!"_

If Liza was colorblind (thank God she's not), she would not be able to do this challenge. But as it is, she's _racing_ through it, going through jars of candy and trays of cupcakes with the dexterity of an Olympic athlete running a triathlon.

Then, as soon as she finishes eating her millionth cookie, Sampson shouts "Okay! You're done!"

"I'm done?" Liza sprints to the front of the room, where Sampson hands her another note. _Thank God. Thank God._ She's already one-third of the way through the challenge, and her fear of death isn't _quite_ as strong as it used to be.

_Eat everything shaped like a square._

"Okay." Liza returns to her mountain of treats. "I'm pretty sure I've eaten everything shaped like a square." _Thank God I went to high school and know what a square is._

She makes a square shape with her hands and gets to work.

 

"I _surely_ have eaten everything red," Tyler insists as he chokes down a peppermint. "Have I not?"

Sampson shakes his head.

Liza has already moved on to the second step of the challenge, and the _you're dead_ voices in Tyler's mind are louder than they ever were. It takes every ounce of strength he has to ignore his rising panic and keep eating.

"This does _not_ taste very good, Sampson," complains Liza. She gobbles up a chocolate chip brownie, then makes a face. "Sampson, did you make these?"

Finally, Tyler clears his side of all the red food. "I'm good!" He takes the next clue from Sampson. Square foods? Got it. He's not _too_ far behind Liza, and he can be a pretty competitive person when he wants to be. Maybe he still has a chance at surviving this challenge.

He spends the next several minutes eating square chocolates, square brownies, and even a square piece of gum. After a while, everything starts to taste the same to him.

"Where the squares at?" Liza asks, using her arms to make a square.

"I can't tell you," Sampson squeaks.

Liza's mouth is stained with crumbs and chocolate. "Point with your finger that you don't have."

At this point, Tyler doesn't feel too well. His stomach hurts, his intestines are screaming for mercy, and he's minutes away from throwing up all over the baking room floor. "Can we have water?" he moans through a mouthful of brownie.

Another shake of the head from Sampson.

 _I should've known._ "No water. This is...this is stupid." Maybe it would be better to just give up and let himself die. After all, if he becomes a pie, at least he'll make someone happy...and at least he won't feel queasy anymore...

 _No._ That's the stomachache talking. He wants—no, _needs_ —to survive.

On the other side of the room, Liza looks confused. "Where's a square?"

"Dump things out if you need to," suggests Sampson.

Tyler grimaces. "Don't _help_ her!"

"I mean, honey, _one_ of us needs to live!" cries Liza, dumping out a jar of taffy. After failing to find any squares in there, she studies a half-eaten donut, mutters "this ain't a square," and tosses it aside.

Just when Tyler's about to explode from an excess of square-shaped sweets, Sampson hands him the third and final clue. Tyler grabs it, takes a moment to catch his breath, and reads.

_Eat the king's cake._

_"No!"_ Tyler's entire body is up in arms about this new task. "That's not even possible! There's no way!" He's already eaten enough sweets to supply an _army._ He feels sick. He may or may not have developed diabetes. And now they expect him to eat an entire _cake_ on top of _everything else_ he's eaten tonight?

He sighs. If he wants to keep his life, he _has_ to eat this cake. So he takes a deep breath, digs in, and ignores his sobbing stomach. _Don't think about it. Just eat. Just stay alive._

 

"What'd you get?" Liza asks Tyler.

"Nothing." He's currently eating a small white cake, and he looks like he'd rather be pulling teeth. "Mind your business."

Liza doesn't like this challenge anymore. "Honey, we're on the same team!" She dumps out another jar of candy. "I thought..." _He's ahead. If I don't hurry up and finish these square sweets, he's going to win, and I'm going to die._ "There's no squares, Sampson!"

Sampson does not reply.

It's not fair. Liza's eaten all the squares in this room. She's flipped the place upside down in her search for squares, and she's pretty sure she chowed down every last one. She should know. Her stomach _hates_ her now. If she doesn't _get_ killed, she's going to kill _herself_ by eating all of this.

She picks up a donut and nibbles on it dejectedly. "I'm eating this cause I'm giving up." What's the point? She's obviously missing _something,_ but she feels too queasy to figure out what it is. There's only so much sugary stuff a little brown girl can take.

 _"Don't accept death!"_ Gabbie screams in her ear.

Liza grits her teeth. Gabbie's right. She _can't_ give up now. She _has_ to fight—for her friends, for her family, for David, for everyone she left behind. If she wants to see them again, she _has_ to keep eating.

There's a few small boxes on the shelves. Liza takes one, opens it, and finds a chocolate. "Is that the square, Sampson?"

"That's _a_ square," is Sampson's response.

Well, that's all Liza needs to hear. "Omigod." She rips through the rest of the boxes, shoving chocolates into her mouth. "I found the squares, Sampson!" The rich, creamy chocolate melts in her mouth as she runs to retrieve her last clue. One glance at the card tells her everything. "Cake." She tosses it aside, finds a small blue cake, and begins to rip it apart.

"Are you _really_ gonna eat that?" Tyler sighs.

"Am I really gonna live?" Liza shoots back. "Yes." She bites into a piece, only to double over in pain from the sheer _mass_ of everything she's eaten. This is too much. She has a sweet tooth, but that sweet tooth is about to fall out.

Fortunately for her, Tyler looks even sicker than she feels. His face is pale, he's drenched in his own sweat, and he moans "these, like, _hurt"_ in a voice that reminds Liza of a whimpering dog with two broken legs. At the rate he's going, he _can't_ last much longer.

Liza winces with every bite. She's not sure if she's gonna be able to pack away the whole cake, but if she does, she hopes it goes to her booty. Lord knows it could use the extra weight.

 

It hurts. It _hurts._ Tyler doesn't want to do this anymore. The cake is layer after layer, with mountains of white icing, and there's _no_ way he can fit the entire thing into his already stuffed body. "Omigod." He's on the verge of passing out. "I, like, don't feel good."

"Tyler." Liza's face is contorted into a miserable expression. "I do _not_ feel good."

"I hate you." _One more piece. One more bite, and it'll all be over._

He chews. He swallows. He tries not to puke.

Then, just as his stomach forces itself to process the cake without barfing, Sampson pulls down the ribbon on his side of the room. "Done!"

"Omigod!" _I did it! I'm going to live! I'm not going to get baked into a pie after all!_ "Yes!" He waves his arms in the air, drunk on his victory, mentally thanking his digestive system for saving his life. He could _cry,_ he's so relieved.

But then, Liza bursts into tears, and Tyler's joy turns to grief.

 

The word _"No!"_ escapes Liza's lips as a broken sob. "I'm not done, Sampson! No!"

Sampson turns to her, his eyes brimming with sympathy. "I'm sorry."

 _It's over._ Liza's heart aches with the truth of her loss. _Tyler won. I'm dead. I'm about to be baked into a pie._ She cries into her cake, mourning every moment of her rapidly decreasing lifespan, wishing that she had never come to this godawful party.

"Now," says Sampson to Tyler, "as the winner, to finish..."

Tyler's mouth drops open. "To _finish?"_

"You ain't done," blubbers Liza.

"You must eat a piece of meat pie," Sampson explains.

Tyler raises an eyebrow. "Is it made out of baby?"

Liza doesn't care if the pie is made out of baby or not. She would give everything in the world to eat that meat pie. She's eaten _so_ many sweets...all she wants is a _little_ bit of salty...or, at the very least, a chance at life. _Don't kill me. Not yet. I don't wanna go. I'm not ready. Please. Please. Please._

Sampson takes the meat pie out of the oven.

"It was so good," weeps Liza, "and so bad!" The taste of sugar lingers on her tongue, but it's no longer delicious.

"Are you..." Tyler gapes at the pie. "No. No! That's...just a _piece_ of that?"

Liza sniffles. "Just eat a bite of it, baby." If there's one good thing about her impending death, it's this: at least Tyler gets to live. Tyler, her friend, her gingerbread partner, the boy with a heart as golden as his hair...at least she doesn't have to watch him get thrown into the gingerbread woman's oven. It was bad enough watching DeStorm die. Watching Tyler die would've probably scarred her for life.

Her loved ones reenter her mind. She fixes their faces to her retinas, using her memories of them as distractions from the horror of her fate. There's no hope for her, but maybe, if she tries hard enough, she can at _least_ —

"You know what?" The fear on Sampson's face is gone. In its place is the rock-hard resolve of a man who's been pushed too far. "You can _both_ live. I'll give you the gem if you help me kill the gingerbread woman."

 _What?_ Liza stops crying. _Did I hear that right? Do I still have a chance?_

The Hallelujah Chorus plays in her soul.

 

 _Liza can live._ Never in his wildest dreams could Tyler have predicted this best-case scenario, but now that the possibility is in front of him, he doesn't hesitate. _I have to save her. I'll do whatever it takes._

"You just have to take a piece of the pie," Sampson tells him, gesturing to the meat pie. "You tell her that it tastes _terrible,_ and something's _wrong_ with it, and there _must_ be something wrong with the oven."

Tyler, Sampson, and Liza all start talking at once, excitement and hope coloring their voices.

"She's very upset—"

"—the oven—"

"—when she goes in—"

"—and then we just—"

"I will shut the door." Sampson, especially, sounds happier than ever before. "And then you can have the gem!"

"Yes!" cheers Liza.

As if on cue, the gingerbread woman walks into the room. Tyler takes a deep breath, curls his fists against his sides, and tries to ignore his still-queasy stomach. This is it. He's the Thespian. It's time for him to give the performance of a lifetime.

"Good day!" He bows. He does his best to sound cheery, but he's pretty sure that he just sounds like he's being strangled.

Liza, being Liza, is _much_ better at pretending to be pleasant. "You look _marvelous!"_ she exclaims.

The gingerbread woman studies Liza like a butcher examining a prime cut of beef. "I see you've been fattened up nicely for the oven."

"Thank you!" says Liza in a singsong voice, wiggling her butt at the woman who wants to cook her alive. "This little booty..."

With a flourish, the gingerbread woman turns her attention to Tyler. "You..."

"Yes!" Tyler almost screams.

"Eat up," she giggles, pointing to the pie, "and you can leave in one piece."

Tyler plasters an innocent smile onto his sweat-stained face. "Thank you!" The "you" is held out for way too long, as if to disguise how terrified he truly is of this woman.

"Eat up!"

"It looks tasty," says Liza helpfully.

"Yes!" _Come on, Ty. You got this. Pull yourself together._ "Very delicious!" _Don't think about the fact that this pie is probably made out of kids. Just eat it. Liza will die if you don't. This is the only way for you both to live._

He sticks a forkful of pie into his mouth and gulps it down, where it joins the ten million treats already in his stomach. He feels awful.

"Is it good?" Liza asks.

Tyler shakes his head. "There's something wrong with this."

 _"What?"_ snaps the gingerbread woman.

"There's something wrong!"

"What do you _mean,_ there's something wrong?"

"It's _disgusting,"_ Tyler spits, putting all of his anger at her (and, indeed, his anger at this entire deadly game for everything it's done to him and his friends) into those two words. "You have to check the oven."

"No!" snarls the gingerbread woman. _"Kings_ have feasted on my pie!" _(Cannibalistic kings,_ thinks Tyler, but he holds his tongue.) Her expression is two shades away from demonic. "You guys stay back!" She charges towards the oven.

Tyler smiles. It's working. It's actually working. They're _so close._

 

"Check it, girl!" crows Liza. "Check it!" She _hates_ that awful, child-eating, monstrous blob of a person with every fiber of her being. _If Sampson doesn't push her into the oven, boy, I will._

As the gingerbread woman marches into the oven, there's a look of pure glee on Sampson's face. He shuts the door.

"Sampson?"

The lock clicks into place.

"Sampson!" They can hear the gingerbread woman banging on the door as the oven's fire crackles in the background. "You let me out of here _right now,_ Sampson!"

A grinning Sampson hands Tyler the gem, along with a scroll, and together, Tyler and Liza get the heck out of the bakery. As they flee, Liza shouts unintelligible nonsense into the air, just to remind herself that _she's alive._ She _made_ it. She's going to _live._ They outsmarted the gingerbread woman. Gabbie was right. They don't have to play by the Sorceress's rules anymore.

"Burn, witch!" Sampson's victorious laughter rings in their ears, and it warms Liza's heart to hear his joy. _"Burn!"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Tyler and Liza reunite with the group, and NOTHING BAD HAPPENS WHATSOEVER.


	29. Repercussions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Against all odds, Liza and Tyler have both escaped the bakery. Now, it's time to reveal the good news to the rest of the group! Hooray!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't wanna do this I don't wanna do this I don't wanna do this I don't wanna do this

Twelve minutes after Tyler and Liza's departure, a panic attack sends Joey Graceffa out into the night. _What have I done?_ His lungs struggle for air. _Oh, God, what have I done?_

"Joey?" Tana's right on his heels, still holding her lollipop. "Joey, what's wrong?"

Joey doesn't respond. He's too consumed by guilt to even _hear_ her. He can't forget the betrayed expression on Liza's face as Alison called her name. _He_ did that. _He_ voted for her. _He_ sent her into the challenge. In his efforts to protect her, he might've just prepared her grave, and it's too late to do anything about it.

All he can do is pray.

Gabbie, Andrea, Alex, and Alison join Joey and Tana outside. None of them say a word. They stand there, waiting for a sign of life, waiting for a glimpse of white or red, waiting to find out their friends' fate.

Then, after what feels like a thousand years, they get their answer. And it's not an answer that anyone expects.

"Tyler!"

"Liza!"

"You're _both_ back!"

They appear like a pair of stars against the midsummer sky, shining on despite the odds, _alive._ She's dancing in her boots. He grins from ear to ear. Together, they rejoin the surprised yet joyful group.

Andrea immediately throws her arms around Tyler, while Gabbie screams _"Yes!"_ into the night. Joey waits for Alex to share a quick hug with Liza, then pulls the tiny Explorer into his embrace, beaming through his tears. _I'm sorry, Liza,_ his brain murmurs as her heart beats against his chest. _I screwed up. I shouldn't have voted for you. I regretted it as soon as you left. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry._

The world gave him a second chance to save her from this house. He doesn't plan on letting it go to waste.

 

When she sees Tyler _and_ Liza emerge from that awful room, Tana's soul soars. _They did it,_ she thinks. _They both escaped alive, just like Gabbie said they would. Maybe we can outsmart the Sorceress after all._

She, Gabbie, and Andrea trap Liza in an all-girls group hug. Alex wraps an arm around Tyler's shoulders, while Joey looks like he's going to cry from happiness. Even Alison wears a smile.

"We got _this!"_ announces Tyler, holding up the gem.

Everyone cheers.

"And wait!" Tyler shows off a small white scroll. "They gave us this."

Before they can examine their newest clue, thunder booms, prompting a chorus of screams from the group. Tana scrambles as far away from the sound as she can, a feeling of uncertain dread invading her bones.

"The Sorceress!" yells Alex.

He's right. There she is, emerging from a cloud of smoke like a stereotypical Disney villainess. Seeing her—the one responsible for the deaths of their friends—boils Tana's blood. "Uh-uh." She hurls her half-eaten lollipop at the Sorceress without thinking twice.

The lollipop shatters against the ground. Joey gasps. Tana feels proud of herself.

 

The Sorceress does _not_ look happy to be greeted with a flying piece of candy. "Pick it up!"

 _"You_ pick it up," snaps Liza. She has _no_ idea what the Sorceress wants with them, but she's guessing that the answer is _not_ "she's looking for directions to the hardware store on Mulberry Street." Something's about to happen. Something bad.

"I think you forgot something," sneers the Sorceress.

 _Screw you!_ Liza almost hollers. _We're gonna make it! We_ won't _lose to someone as horrible as you!_

"It's the most important part." the Sorceress continues in a furious voice. "One of you must die!"

An orange bird-woman-thing drags a struggling Sampson into their field of view, and Liza realizes too late what the Sorceress is about to do to her new friend. "No!" she sobs. "Sampson!"

The Sorceress's voice is poison in the summer air. "Kill him!"

_"No!"_

The YouTubers shout pleas to spare him, but there's no sparing Sampson now. The bird uses its claws to slice his neck open. He dies within seconds.

 _Sampson..._ Liza's heart sinks into her stomach. Tears pool up against her eyelashes, and it's taking all the strength within her to keep them from spilling onto her cheeks. _He's gone...he saved me...and now he's dead...I'm never gonna see him again..._

_I should've said thank you when I had the chance._

 

Alex stands in front of the group, a shield between them and the Sorceress, as a trembling Tyler clings to his arm. He's just witnessed the murder of a man he only met once before. He's sad, of course, but he has to stay focused. He _can't_ let the Sorceress hurt his friends. Just because nobody died in the gingerbread woman's game doesn't mean that _she_ has to kill someone to make up for it.

 _And if you're going to kill someone,_ pipes up a tiny voice in the back of his mind, _take me. Not them. Leave them alone._

"One of you must die," insists the Sorceress as the orange harpy throws Sampson's corpse inside the house. "That is the most important part. That is the rule of the game."

A second harpy (blue this time) charges through the door. Everyone screams. Alex pushes Tyler behind him, makes sure that everyone else has already started running, and then, finally, takes off running himself.

Just when he thinks he's saved them, a cry of _"No!"_ echoes in his ears.

He whirls around. The harpy is dragging Liza towards the house. Alex screams _"Liza!"_ and attempts to grab her outstretched hand, but Joey's shellshocked self is in the way. "No!" _Not Liza, please, no, take me, kill me instead..._

 

"No!" Liza struggles with all her might, but the bird chick's grip is too strong for her, and she's yanked through the doorway despite her panicked attempts at escape. "No! Don’t!" _I'm not ready to go! I thought…I thought I'd have more time…_

Her friends' screams grow fainter.

_Please…just one more game…one more challenge…one more chance…_

The bird skids to a stop just behind the door. Its claws are out, and Liza knows that this is where she dies.

 _At least…at least I did_ some _good…right?_

 

"Wait!" Tyler hears Tana's frightened voice in the wind. "Who did they take?"

"They took Liza!"

 _They took Liza._ Tyler screeches to a halt, then turns around just in time to see the glass door swing shut. _No. This can't be happening. I saved her. We_ both _got to live. This is not how the story's supposed to go._

And then, a gallon of blood stains the door, and Liza Koshy is dead.

"Run along now!" laughs the Sorceress as the six remaining YouTubers flee in terror. "Things are just starting to get fun."

"Oh, she's dead, she's the most dead," whimpers Alex.

Tyler doesn't process his journey back to the living room. He doesn't hear Joey's shouts of "Get in! Get in!" as the group reenters the house, nor does he understand the girls' confused gasps of "What just happened?" and "What was that?" All he hears is Liza's voice, screaming in his head, reminding him that his efforts to cheat the system weren't enough.

He wordlessly puts the fourth gem in the gem map, then collapses onto the couch.

His stomach still hurts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Liza. It's not fair.  
> Next chapter: Time for everyone to take a much-needed break, featuring scenes that were not in the show.


	30. We Who Are About to Die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After everything they've endured, our six survivors deserve a quick moment to mourn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Confession time: nothing that happens in this chapter was shown in the TV show. Since you guys liked the breather chapter I wrote for the last story, I decided to write a breather chapter for this one as well. Enjoy!

Joey stares at the half-full gem map with eyes of broken glass. Liza's gone. For one shining moment, he thought she'd stick around, but then the Sorceress's harpies came and killed her. Now, she's just another friend lost to this twisted game.

He's grieving for twelve people at once. He wonders how many more deaths he can take.

Tyler's voice is strained with sadness. "If we try to outsmart her," he murmurs, referring to the Sorceress, "it's not gonna end well."

"We have to play by the rules," says Andrea.

"We have to play by the rules." Tyler falls silent for a few minutes, then winces, his shaking hands clutching his stomach. "Um..." His face is a moldy shade of green. "I...don't feel so good..."

And with that, he runs for the bathroom.

Joey's mind immediately jumps to _poison, death, he's dying,_ but he pushes those thoughts aside and lets himself breathe. "I think..." He sighs. "I think we need a break. Let's take ten minutes..."

The others mutter their assent.

 

Tyler's in the bathroom, by himself, puking all the sweets he ate into a Victorian toilet. Somehow, his Thespian outfit remains unstained, but he couldn't care less. He doesn't _want_ to be the Thespian anymore.

He just wants to be Tyler.

If he's being honest with himself...he's not going to make it. Somehow, some way, he's going to screw up, and this house is going to bring his story to a grisly end. But god _freakin'_ dammit, he _wants_ to survive, he _wants_ his life so badly that terrified tears coat his glasses with a watery mist. _I don't wanna die._ He's sobbing and barfing at the same time. _I know I'm gonna...but I don't wanna..._

Memories of Liza flood his mind, and he remembers that she's dead. She's _dead,_ and he tried _so hard_ to save her, but in the end, it didn't matter. This is the Sorceress's game. Her rules are law.

Sampson, too. He never thanked him. He can't even remember the last thing he said to the man.

_Knock, knock._

What was that? Is something coming to kill him?

_Knock, knock._

"No!" He chokes out a scream. "Don't come in! Stay away!" Another pint of puke hits the toilet water, and he curls into a quivering ball on the bathroom floor.

_Knock, knock._

"Tyler, it's me! Are you okay? What's going on?"

Oh, thank God. It's only Andrea. Not a monster. Not his doom. Just Andrea, wondering if he's all right. "I'm fine," he lies.

"Okay. Well, I'm here if you need me."

Tyler pulls himself to his feet, wipes his glasses, and pushes them back into place. He takes a breath. He's fine. He's _fine._ He feels a _lot_ better. He's going to leave this bathroom. He'll be okay. For now.

 

Andrea carries a stoic expression like a security blanket. She's strong. She's brave. She _will_ not cry. Crying is a sign of weakness, and the weak ones never last long.

On the other hand, if Liza's death is anything to go by, even the _strong_ ones aren't safe anymore.

Tyler finally exits the bathroom, and _God,_ he looks like hell. His hair's a mess, his eyes are blue pools of panic, his pale face is soaked with tears, and he's wrapped himself in his red coat. "H-hey, Andrea," he stammers. "I'm okay."

Andrea knows a lie when she hears one, so she pulls Tyler into a hug. Tyler promptly starts crying again.

"Tyler..." Andrea's tone is that of a concerned friend, but in her mind, she's begging Tyler to _stop crying, please, be happy, I don't know how much longer I can keep up this calm facade, you're making it worse, you're making me want to cry, please stop crying._

"I tried to save her..." He's hyperventilating his grief into her shoulder. "I tried...I did...I'm tired of this...it hurts...I wanna go home..."

He's right. It _does_ hurt. Andrea still remembers the anxiety on Lauren's face, Jesse's frightened eyes, DeStorm's defiant final stand, and Liza's screams for help. Four of their friends have been murdered by the Sorceress and her lieutenants, and they're only halfway through their quest to stop her.

Andrea blinks back a tear. "We gotta keep fighting," she whimpers. "We gotta do our best to stay alive."

Tyler cries even harder.

At this point, Andrea can't hold back her tear-stained terror anymore. She, too, starts crying. Her quiet sobs mingle with Tyler's noisy ones. _I'm weak,_ moans her soul. _I can't even comfort my friend without falling apart._

But, in the end, she's a scared little girl trying and failing to soothe a scared little boy, and this house is too much for either of them to endure.

They break down together.

 

Last time, Joey used the ten-minute break to write down everything he'd endured, in the hopes that his account would serve as a warning to anyone who dared to enter his house. This time, he wanders the halls in a trance, refusing to even _think_ about (let _alone_ write down) his experience.

Then, he finds a corpse.

 _Liza's_ corpse.

Her eyes are locked in fear. Her mouth is slightly open, as if she's about to shout a last goodbye to those she once loved. Worst of all, her once-white kerchief is now red, stained with blood from the ghastly wound on her neck.

Joey can't leave her like this. She doesn't deserve to rot on the floor of this cursed Victorian manor. He needs to find her a better resting place.

First things first. He closes her eyes, and her expression is already a thousand times more peaceful. Then, he picks her up (she's almost weightless in his arms) and carries her upstairs, holding back tears with every step.

This is the least he can do for the girl he sent to die.

 

Gabbie finds DeStorm's clothes right where he left them. His coat, shirt, and overalls are a crumpled heap on the floor, and his top hat has been flung haphazardly into a corner of the room. Gabbie picks up the hat and hugs it to her chest.

She does not cry. She will not give this house the satisfaction.

 _DeStorm...Liza...why'd you leave me? Why did you have to go? I miss you...oh, God, but I_ have _to survive...I_ can't _join you...not now...not after everything the Sorceress has put me through..._

"Gabbie?"

She turns around, and there's Tana, staring at her with sad brown eyes. "Tana!" Gabbie leaps to her feet, DeStorm's hat still in her hands. "What's going on? Is everything all right?"

The blonde looks like she's been crying. "I...I just came to see you...I know you were friends with Liza, so I wanted to make sure you were doing okay..."

Gabbie winces at the mention of Liza. _Some friend I was,_ she chides herself. They've been here all night, fighting vampires and spiders and Confederates and gingerbread ladies, and yet, through it all, Gabbie barely spent _any_ time with Liza. She was too busy worrying about her own life to keep an eye on her Vlog Squad pal, and she never took the time to tell Liza how much she meant to her. Now, it's too late. Liza's gone. Forever.

Well, you know what? Gabbie's never going to make that mistake again. Not while she still has friends to protect.

She casually throws an arm around Tana. "Listen," she says in a strong voice. "We have four gems. We're halfway there. We just gotta keep moving forward, and we'll be fine."

"But..." Tana sniffles. "Liza..."

"We have to move on." It's true. As much as her heart aches for Liza and DeStorm, crying for them isn't going to bring them back. The past is the past. It's time for her to focus on the future.

Tana bites her lip. "I'm scared, Gabbie. I don't wanna lose anyone else."

Gabbie doesn't know what to say to that. This isn't over. She _knows_ it isn't. They have four gems left to find, and since the "outsmart the Sorceress to save ourselves" strategy didn't work, that means four more lives will be lost. But she _can't_ tell that to Tana. Tana deserves to think that everything is going to be all right, even if it's a lie. Tana deserves to be happy.

 

Tana feels empty. Yes, they _are_ halfway home, so she _should_ be looking forward to seeing 2017 again, but these gems will _never_ be worth the lives of their friends. She wishes that there was another way.

On top of that, there's still a chance that _she_ could be the next to go. It's a chance that she'd rather not think about.

"Hey," whispers Gabbie after a minute of silence, "when we get out of here, do you want to hang out? I bet we can throw a _much_ better party than this shitfest."

Tana chuckles. "That's not _hard,_ Gab. All we have to do is not kill anyone."

"True."

"To be honest," Tana admits, "I don't want to go to any more parties for a while. I'd rather just eat candy and watch a movie or something."

Gabbie's eyes sparkle with hope. "There's some stuff on Netflix I've been meaning to watch. Maybe you and I can have ourselves a good old-fashioned movie night."

"As long as it's not a horror movie, I'm in," is Tana's reply.

The girls spend a few minutes discussing Netflix's most recent releases before the subject shifts to a bad chick flick that Gabbie's sister made her watch one time. Neither of them bring up the possibility of death. Neither of them mention anything that has anything to do with what they've suffered.

They're storytellers. If they escape alive, they'll turn tonight into a tragic story of survival. They won't put it on YouTube, because Tana can't imagine making money off of her friends' deaths, but they'll tell the story to anyone who's brave enough to hear it. They'll warn everyone to stay away from Joey's crazy parties. They'll work together to make sure that this never happens again.

Tana will never be the girl she was before, but as long as Gabbie's by her side, she's going to be as close to okay as it is possible to be.

 

_Shane Dawson, poisoned. Andrea Brooks, gassed to death. Justine Ezarik, buried alive. GloZell Green, killed by a murder journal._

Joey trudges down the third-floor hallway, Liza in his arms, his brain wracked with guilt and long-dead names. He remembers inheriting a marvelous estate, and he curses the day he stepped out of his own time.

_Sierra Furtado, died during an exorcism. Matt Haag, poisoned. Timothy DeLaGhetto, shot himself. Lele Pons, electrocuted._

So many things he could've done differently. So many people he could've saved. Now, they've become a plethora of ghostly memories.

_Lauren Riihimaki, eaten by vampires. Jesse Wellens, eaten by Jorogumo. DeStorm Power, shot with an arrow. Liza Koshy, throat slit._

All his fault.

He's tired of killing people. He's tired of coating his hands in his friends' blood. He never wants to vote for anyone to go into a death challenge ever again.

 

"Alison?"

"Yes?"

"You..." Alex struggles to squeeze a sentence through his clenched teeth. "You were there, right? You saw it. And you're a vampire, so...you should _know_...right?"

"Know what?" she asks.

Every molecule in Alex's body is screaming at him not to ask this question. The answer will hurt him. He _knows_ it will. And yet, he has to know. "Do...do you think..." His lip quivers. He fights back another round of tears. "Was Lauren in pain?"

"Alex." Alison's voice is emotionless and sympathetic all at once. "Listen to me. There were at least twenty, if not more, vampires feeding on her. At that rate of blood loss...and with her body weight...she would've lost consciousness in less than three minutes. Furthermore, there's a special mechanism in our...in vampire saliva, which drugs the victim to prevent what my father called 'unnecessary escape attempts.' After the initial bites, which _do_ hurt, the pain is pretty much negated by the drugs. So, yes, she suffered a bit, but not for long."

Alex nods robotically. "Oh..." He's supposed to feel comforted by this information, but honestly, it only makes him feel worse. "I see..."

He's not gonna cry.

He's not gonna cry.

He's bawling.

"Shh." Alison wraps him in a hug. "You'll be all right. Don't cry."

"It's not true," he blubbers into his palms. "This is all a bad dream. I'm gonna wake up, and she's gonna be there, playing with her stupid goddamn stuffies." He shoves his lies into his brain in a vain attempt to make himself believe them. "I'm gonna get her a puppy soon. She..." A million broken plans for their lost future flash before his eyes. "She _can't_ be dead!" What the _hell_ is he supposed to do without her?

 _Stay alive,_ commands a voice that sounds like hers. _Survive. Live on. For both of us._

He won't deny it: a part of him does not want to escape. Death means reuniting with her in whatever afterlife exists, which is a tempting prospect. But a stronger part of him burns with an unquenchable desire to get out of here. That is what she'd want for him. And, because he loves her, he'll do his best to carry her legacy back to 2017.

He'll keep living. He'll fight on for as long as he can, and he won't give up until there's no point in fighting anymore.

That's his promise.

 

Joey's in a tiny bedroom on the third floor, ready to give Liza the closest thing to a funeral he can offer.

His hands tremble as he tucks her into bed. A thick blanket covers the gash on her neck, hiding any hint of blood, creating an illusion that insists "she's just sleeping, give her time, she'll wake up eventually." Joey can only look at her for so long before tears begin to beat against the corners of his pupils.

"I'm sorry, Liza." His voice is strangely hollow. "Goodbye."

As he leaves the bedroom, he locks the door behind him.

It's time to get back to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Magic is real, apparently, which gives the group an opportunity to cast a spell. Also, a new alliance is formed.


	31. Ashes and Allies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four are dead. The six who remain must stop bickering long enough to figure out how to perform magic.

Six YouTubers reunite in the green room, their hearts broken, their eyes red from crying, their souls determined to finish what they've begun.

"I can't believe she's gone," murmurs Alex, and Joey can't tell if he's referring to Liza or Lauren.

Andrea, who clearly has Liza on her mind, points an accusing finger at Joey. "She wouldn't _be_ gone," the Mystic spits, "if _Joey_ didn't turn on her!"

She's right. Joey _knows_ she's right, and yet, a dark impulse pushes him to deny the truth. "It wasn't my fault that Liza's gone. If anything, it's Tyler's fault."

"How is it _Tyler's_ fault?" Andrea snarls.

"Because!" snaps Joey. "He's here, she's not!"

"It's the critter's fault." Tyler seems to have gotten over his nausea, but sorrow lingers in his eyes. "Whatever that was..." His voice struggles not to break. "We were _both_ supposed to live."

 _She could've made it._ Joey wants to know what happened in the gingerbread woman's lair, but he doesn't ask. He'd rather not think about Liza Koshy anymore.

 

"Guys," says Alex, "we _can't_ blame each other. They're forcing us to do this." If they waste time passing the buck around the room, they'll be playing right into the Sorceress's hands. They have to work as a team. If they don't, they're _all_ going to die.

 _That's a bit hypocritical,_ sneers a voice in his head, _coming from the guy who blamed DeStorm for Lauren and killed him as a result._

"Okay, so how many more gems do we have to get?" Joey asks.

"Four," Tyler replies, holding up four fingers.

"And we have this." Andrea picks up the scroll that Tyler brought back from the baking room. "We got this last time, right?"

"Let me see," says Tyler.

Andrea opens the scroll, and Tyler reads it aloud.

_To recover the next gem, outsider, you must save our world from the Ice Witch's evil wrath. I have placed a compass in the—_

"Heerth?" Tyler's tongue trips over the word, and the confused expression on his face is something that Alex has seen a thousand times before. "How do you say that?"

"Hearth," Andrea answers.

_...the hearth that can lead you to our realm._

"Hearth means fireplace," mutters Joey, turning to look at the fireplace behind them.

Alex takes one look at the bricks and realizes what they have to do. Together, he and Joey push their way through the fireplace, revealing a small, hollow space inside.

"There's something in here." Joey pulls a sphere-shaped object out of the hole. "What _is_ this?"

"Oh, _wow,_ strong man!" exclaims Gabbie.

The object turns out to be the magical compass that they're looking for. Joey holds it up to the light. "I've never seen anything like this before."

"Is that _all_ the note said?" asks Alex.

Andrea shakes her head. "It will lead you to our _realm."_

"Alex," questions Joey, "is there anything else in there?"

 _Knowing this house,_ thinks Alex, _probably._ He filters his hand through the hole in the fireplace. "Wait." His fingers touch a piece of paper. "Oh! Another note!"

Tyler's by his side in seconds. "What's it say?"

_The compass will lead you to the portal between worlds, but its source of magic has faded in your realm. My spellbook has an incantation that will restore its magic._

 

Tyler doesn't understand why they're suddenly dabbling in magic. Then again, he didn't understand the gingerbread woman, or the Confederates, or the spiders, or even the vampires...heck, he doesn't understand a _thing_ about this house. He might as well just roll with the punches.

"The spellbook's _definitely_ in there," says Joey, approaching a cabinet. "There's a _lot_ of books in here."

Tyler shrugs. _Sure. Fine. Spellbooks. Let's do this._

The group rifles through the cabinet for a bit before Joey finds the right book. "Wait." He flips to a page, then smiles. "I think this is it."

_The spell to restore magic requires two components: a vial of maiden's blood, and ashes (remains of a hero). One is hidden in the dining room, and the other is in the sick room on the second floor. Recover these, and you'll be ready to cast the spell._

"Guys, let's split up," suggests Alex. "You three..." He gestures to Joey, Andrea, and Gabbie, then turns his attention to Tyler and Tana. "...and us three."

"You guys do the dining room, and we'll go upstairs," says Andrea.

"Perfect. Let's go."

Tyler follows Tana and Alex to the dining room, completely unfazed. Of _course_ they need blood and ashes. Why _wouldn't_ they need those things? _Everybody_ uses blood and ashes to cast spells! Nothing weird about that!

The dining room is dimly lit. Its table has been set for a feast that never took place, and various pieces of artwork line its walls. "Come on," says Alex as the three of them enter. "Okay. Vial of blood or ashes. Look for, like, an urn that would be full of dust."

Tana's already examining a statuette. Tyler admires her work ethic.

"Oh!" Alex points to a vase. "Check that right there, Tyler. That looks like an urn."

Tyler does as he's told. He picks up the urn, shakes it, and places it on the table for closer examination.

Tana bites her lip. "This room is creepy as hell."

"Is there dust?" Alex asks.

Tyler hopes so. Tana's right. This room has a sinister feel to it. The sooner they find the blood and/or ashes, the sooner they can get the hell out of here.

 

Add a goddamn _hospital_ to the list of things in this house that nobody told Gabbie about. At this point, if somebody told her that there was an actual jungle in the basement, she wouldn't bat an eye.

"Okay, so ashes or blood," recites Andrea. Then, she cries "Wait, wait, wait!" and snatches up a small vial of red liquid.

"Is this just the blood?" Joey wants to know.

"I think that's..." Gabbie frowns. "Is that it?"

"But...wait..." Andrea puts the vial down and searches the shelves. "It could be..." Her eyes widen. "Wait. You guys."

The shelves are stacked with bottled blood. "Okay." Gabbie wrinkles her nose in disgust. After what happened with Liza, she's grown sick of the sight of blood. "There's a _lot_ of blood here. Why is there this _hospital_ in this _house?_ What is going on?" It's not normal for people to keep blood in their house. Then again, it's not normal to be abducted by a sorceress and forced to play death games, either, so whatever.

 

Tyler twists off the top of the urn to reveal...nothing. "Ah!" Alex sighs. "I though that was it."

Tana leaps into action. "Guys!" she shouts, pointing at a painting of a grim-faced man. _Gabbie's right. If I'm going to get out of here, I can't dwell on the past. I have to prove to the group that they still need me._

She reads the painting's inscription aloud to her friends.

_Captain Wesley Adams, war hero and father. May his ashen remains be encased in clay._

Tyler waves a hand at the other side of the room. "Maybe over yonder?"

Alex investigates, and sure enough, he finds another urn underneath a table. "Found it!" He takes a peek inside. "Ashes. There's ash in here. Don't inhale it."

Of course, Tana knows better than to inhale ashes, but it warms her heart that Alex is nice enough to look out for their safety.

"So we got it." Alex grins. "Let's go tell the others."

Tyler nods. "Let's go get the girls. And Joey."

Together, the three of them head back to the living room.

 

"There's a chart over here, guys," Joey tells the girls, picking up a piece of paper from a nearby table.

Gabbie joins him. Andrea, meanwhile, inspects the bottles. "These are all labeled," she remarks.

"Let's see..." Joey squints at the chart. Dozens of names, genders, ages, and conditions fill out the narrow columns. "Female..." He wonders offhand if any of the patients were lucky enough to leave this hospital.

"So it definitely has to be a female, because she's a maiden," says Gabbie.

Joey doesn't look up. "Right. Patient numbers 116, 117, and 125." He glances over at Andrea, who's still looking through the bottles. "Do they say that on there?"

"Yes, there's numbers," Andrea responds. "Okay, what were they? Read them again."

"116, 117, 125. Do you have those?"

"Nope," says Andrea, and Joey considers bashing his head against the nearest wall.

 

Alex sits with Tyler and Tana in the green room, waiting for their friends to return with the maiden's blood. "I can't believe we found it this quick, and they're having problems," the Novelist thinks aloud.

"I think, at voting, we should remember how long it's taking our friends to find something," says Tana.

A flash of hope races across Alex's mind, and he realizes what he has to do. "You guys wanna make an alliance?" His tone is as warm as his heart. "Our alliance is...we just promise not to vote for each other."

"I am _so_ down for an alliance!" Tyler almost cheers.

Tana's voice is more cautious. "And don't you feel like, right now, _they're_ making an alliance?"

"Yeah." Alex's fingers tap against the compass in his hands. "Especially the Mystic, Andrea. I don't know if I trust her."

"She hasn't done _one_ challenge," Tana points out.

Alex nods. "Not one."

"Neither has Joey," adds Tyler.

"Neither has Joey," Alex repeats.

"Omigod." Tana gasps with childish delight. "Guys, we just made an alliance." She smiles, and so does Tyler, and Alex finds a new sense of purpose in their eyes.

These are his _friends._ This is Tana, the kind-hearted girl whose laughter is as contagious as the world's most wonderful virus. And this is Tyler, his friend since childhood, with whom he's spent hundreds of summer afternoons. Lauren is gone, but they are still here. They need to be protected. He can't let the Sorceress take them away from him.

From now on, he, Alex Wassabi, will do whatever he can to save Tana Mongeau and Tyler Oakley from this terrible place. As long as they're alive, he has a reason to live that goes beyond honoring Lauren's memory.

He _won't_ let them go.

 

"Was 135 one?" asks Joey.

Andrea checks. Sure enough, one of the bottles has the number 135 written on its label. "Yes." _Finally. We're getting somewhere._

"Okay." Joey holds up the chart. "I have 135."

"Okay, guys, I think it's Daria," says Gabbie, pointing to a name on the chart. "Patient 135. She's female. She's eighteen."

Female...eighteen..."That's her!" It _has_ to be. They're looking for a maiden's blood, and Daria is the closest thing to a maiden they've found so far. "Okay. Let's go."

Andrea, Gabbie, and Joey take Daria's blood and run back to the green room.

 

Tana's part of an alliance now, and she feels happier than she's felt in hours. But, at the same time, guilt gnaws at the back of her brain, insisting that she doesn't deserve Alex and Tyler's friendship. _She_ sent Lauren to her death. _She_ almost killed Tyler. If the world was just, the boys wouldn't want anything to do with her.

_Don't think like that. You're a good person. They love you. They forgive you._

"Guys!" Joey's voice interrupts her inner conflict. "We got the blood!"

"We got the ashes!" Alex shouts back, holding up the urn.

Everyone gathers around the table. "I have the spell," says Andrea, showing off the spellbook. She reads it.

_Make a circle with the ash and place the object inside._

Alex sprinkles the ashes into the shape of a circle, then puts the compass at the center. "Omigosh," Joey moans. "That is _disgusting!"_

"This reminds me of some wild nights in the saloon," Tana jokes in a halfhearted attempt to remind herself that she's still playing a character. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Gabbie giggling quietly.

_Speak the words of the spell as the maiden's blood is dripped around the ashen circle._

"Oh," groans Tyler as Alex drips the blood. "I don't love it."

Everything is ready. "Do you wanna try it together?" Andrea asks the group. "Like, all at the same time?" After gaining the group's consent, she grabs Joey's hand and holds the spellbook out to Tana. "Okay. You hold onto this book."

Tana supports the book with one hand, while her other hand clutches Alex's. Alex is also holding hands with Tyler, who's holding hands with Gabbie, who's holding hands with Joey, who's holding hands with Andrea, who's helping Tana hold up the book.

"Ready," says Andrea. "Set. Go."

_"Pela en bela templa elea eh, pela en bela templa elea eh, pela en bela templa elea eh."_

The compass glows with an otherworldly green light. Everyone gasps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: We interrupt this horror story to bring you something out of one of those high fantasy novels. Also, Gabbie practices her comedy routine, and everyone twerks.


	32. The Accidental Heroes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, the YouTubers are "the heroes of the prophecy," so it's time for them to start a heroic quest. The heroic quest quickly devolves into grade-A cringe.

"This is the compass," Tyler breathes, pointing at the glowing compass in front of them.

Before Andrea can think of a proper response to that, a woman's voice fills the room. _"My light will lead you into forgotten realms. It will glow brightest when you move in the proper direction._

"Oh!" exclaims Gabbie. "It's like Hot and Cold!"

Andrea takes the compass. It's a bit heavy, but it's nothing that she can't handle. Besides, she _still_ hasn't been in a challenge yet, so maybe this will convince the group not to send her into whatever deadly game they encounter next. "So it'll glow brightest when we go the right way," she murmurs.

"It's fading!" several people shout at once, and three or four pairs of hands turn Andrea around.

"Try this door," suggests Alex.

Andrea tries it. No luck. "It's still faded. Let's go towards the hallway." She heads for the hallway, and the compass lights up. "Oh! It's getting brighter. There we go. It's the hallway."

Everyone follows Andrea into the hallway. Andrea feels like a mother duck leading a troupe of baby ducklings into danger. Hopefully, this compass business doesn't turn out to be a trap.

 

 _Andrea's not as helpful as she thinks she is,_ snorts Gabbie to herself, rolling her eyes at the Mystic's compass crap. _She's really good at_ pretending _like she's doing stuff. "Oh! I'll hold the compass!" What does_ that _do? She's not sacrificing herself. She's not doing anything dangerous._ Someone _has to hold the goddamn compass._

Gabbie's faced a challenge. So has Alex. So has Tyler. So has Tana (sure, she lost, but she _faced_ one, dammit). What has Andrea done? Nothing. She's kicked back her heels and watched everyone else suffer.

"It's getting brighter," Alex points out.

Andrea bites her lip. "Do you think we should go this way?"

"Let's try outside," says Alex.

"Wait." Gabbie wrinkles her nose. She's already forgotten where they're supposed to be going. _"What's_ this leading us to?"

"Another realm," is Andrea's cryptic reply.

Well, that's just great. As if _this_ realm wasn't creepy enough. If they can travel between realms so easily, why can't they just go home?

After a while, the group reaches a door. "Here." Tyler opens it. "Try out here."

They step onto the balcony. Thunder clashes, and Gabbie spends two seconds wondering if a storm's coming before she spots a strange woman standing on the grass. _The next lieutenant?_ To be honest, probably.

"Do you see that?" Tyler breathes.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," mutters Andrea. "Should we go down there?"

They do.

"It's thundering," Alex whispers.

"Should we go towards her?" Andrea asks. "Who _is_ that?"

The six surviving YouTubers step onto the lawn, passing through a strange green mist in the process. Once there, they approach the woman. She's standing with their back to them, her arms stretched out to heaven, power flowing from her body like a waterfall. Her hair is a wild mess of dark curls. Her brown dress looks like something a woodland princess would wear.

"She's not an ice queen," observes Tana.

Andrea, who's still holding the compass, takes a step closer. "Hello?"

The woman turns around. When she sees the YouTubers, her expression bursts into a smile. "The heroes of our prophecy have arrived," she proclaims to the wind.

Wait. Heroes of the prophecy? Gabbie's a hero, maybe, but the rest of these guys? Nah.

 

Being greeted as one of the "heroes of the prophecy" doesn't feel right to Tyler. _I'm not a hero,_ he wants to tell this woman. _I couldn't save Liza. I spent five minutes throwing up and crying in a bathroom. If_ anyone's _a hero here, it's Alex. Not me._

"Our world has been cursed," explains the woman, "and we need your help."

"Okay," says Joey, hesitation in his voice. "How do we help?"

"The once-lowly Ice Witch has obtained a gem, giving her great power."

Andrea's eyes widen. "That's the gem we need. We need that gem."

"We need that gem!" Tyler's beginning to hate gems, but they need four more of them to go back home. Maybe they'll get lucky. Maybe this gem will _not_ require a death.

 _Don't be silly, Tyler. Of_ course _someone will die. Remember what happened_ last _time you tried to save everyone?_

"To defeat her," the woman continues, "you will need to find the Unquenchable Fire, which lies on the Path of Betrayal. To get to the Path, you will need to find the Talisman. Two evil harpies guard the Talisman."

"That's what killed Liza!" Joey gasps.

Tyler winces. _Don't remind me._

"And they _will_ tear you to pieces unless you have a great warrior by your side," says the woman matter-of-factly, as if she's reciting the instructions for Monopoly.

Tyler examines the group. They need a warrior, which none of them are. Even Alex, as brave and kind as he is, is not warrior material.

The woman stares off into the distance, her eyes fixed on an ice sculpture of a swordsman. "Torhild the Undying was such a warrior. The last spell in my book has the power to reverse the witch's curse and free him."

"She said the last spell," says Alex to Joey, who has the spellbook. Joey find the page and reads it aloud.

_To dispel a curse, you will need tears from a fairy and the Moss King's scepter. Both lie here, hidden in the woods._

"All right." Joey closes the book. "So we need to search for a fairy."

"Let's split up," says Alex.

 _No. Not again. That's how people die in horror movies._ "Let's just look around." Come to think of it, they've somehow gone from horror movie to Lord of the Rings quest. Tyler isn't sure which one he prefers.

 

"A scepter and a fairy," mutters Andrea.

"A staff and a vial of tears," recites Alex.

Tyler squints at the ground. "Fairy tears would be pretty small."

Never in a million years did Joey consider the possibility that he and his friends would be thrown into a fantasyland, but then again, this isn't even the weirdest thing that's happened to him tonight. "So we need to first find the fairy," he remarks, "and then get her tears." He spots a strange object. "Wait! What is this? Is this something?"

Andrea gasps. "Is that the scepter?"

"Guys!" Joey shouts. "I found something!" He holds it to the light. "It's like a flute!"

The brown flute is wrapped in a green leaf, which turns out to be a note. Joey reads it.

_Play the proper note to summon a fairy. If you seek her tears, you must get her to laugh until she cries._

Underneath this message is a series of small dots, some of which are colored in, some of which aren't. "Okay," says Andrea, gesturing to the colored dots. "Cover these with your fingers."

"Here." Joey hands the spellbook to Andrea. "Hold this."

Gabbie points at the colored dots. "Second, fourth, fifth."

Fortunately, Joey used to play the flute when he was younger, so he feels confident that he can at _least_ do _this_ right. He covers up the second, fourth, and fifth dots on the flute, then blows.

For a moment, all is still. Then, Alex yells "Here!" and a fairy emerges from the bushes.

 

The fairy has gossamer wings, long brown locks, and a skirt made of flower petals. She skips into view, all smiles, pixie dust sparkling around her, and Alex feels happy to see someone so untouched by this house of death.

"You called?" she chirps in a honey-sweet voice.

"Yes," Joey replies. "We need your tears."

Her faces scrunches into mischievous distrust. "Why? What are you going to use them for? Evil spells?"

"No," says Alex gently. "We want to break a curse."

The fairy glances around the group, then shrugs. "All right." She sits down. "But first, you must make me laugh."

"What makes you laugh?" questions Alex.

 _"You_ figure it out."

"Um..." Alex plasters a smile across his face. _If you're not smiling, you're doing it wrong._ "I got one! What did the blanket say when he fell off the bed?"

"What?"

"Oh, _sheet!"_

Andrea giggles. "That's good."

The fairy smiles, but doesn't laugh. "That's close," says Alex, proud of his stupid joke despite its reception. "That was close."

 

"Okay." Andrea's still laughing. "Who's got more?"

 _Hello?_ Gabbie does stand-up. This is, without a doubt, her time to shine. "They say don't sweat the small stuff," she tells the fairy. "That's why I got rid of my ex-boyfriend."

Her joke gets a sympathetic giggle from Andrea, an "ayyy" from Tana, and groans from everyone else. The fairy cringes.

"Honestly, that was, like, the worst joke I've ever heard," is Joey's review of Gabbie's stand-up routine.

Gabbie suddenly feels a _lot_ less confident in herself.

"Wait, let's try twerking!" Joey gets down onto the ground. "Someone hold my legs."

Gabbie grabs Joey's legs and lifts them into the air. "I got you! Go, go, go!"

Joey twerks at the fairy. Tana playfully slaps his butt. Everyone else cheers like patrons at a strip club. "Arch your back!" hollers Tana, because of course _Tana_ would be the one to give people tips on how to twerk. Gabbie wouldn't expect anything less from her.

 

The twerking Savant fails to evoke a reaction from the fairy.

"It's not working, guys!" Alex pouts.

Tana sighs. She wishes that Liza was here. Liza would be able to make this fairy _delirious_ with laughter. But Liza's dead, and the others are having trouble replicating her comedic chops.

Tyler is the next to pitch an idea. "Should we get down like we were getting? Like, ratchet and stuff?"

"Yeah!" exclaims Joey. "Okay! Let's just do the spell!"

"You ready?" Tyler asks the fairy, who leans forward expectantly.

"Wait!" Joey positions Gabbie at the center of the group. "Have her in the middle."

Together, the six YouTubers chant "Pela en bela templa elea eh!" while simultaneously dance-twerking like a bunch of drunk teenagers. Tana struts her stuff, flashing her cleavage at the fairy, shaking her butt every which way. This is fun. She likes this. Why don't they do more of _this_ and less of killing each other off in death challenges?

After two minutes of pela-en-bela-templa-elae-ehs, the fairy collapses into hysterics.

Alex's mouth drops open. "She's _laughing!_ Get her tears!"

"All right, all right! Oh, God, that was funny!" admits the fairy through her laughter.

Gabbie frowns. "My feelings are a little hurt."

"Yeah," says Tana sympathetically. _It's okay, Gab. Maybe fairies just don't understand your sense of humor._

The fairy drips her tears into a tiny bottle, then gives it to Andrea. "There you are, darling," she says with a smile.

"Thank you so much," says Tyler.

"Thank you for the tears!" Alex waves at their new fairy friend. "Toodle-oo!"

The fairy sends them off with a "Run along now," and the group leaves her to find the scepter. Tana's still on a joyful high from their ratchet antics, so she grins like an idiot at everything she sees.

"Guys," Alex reminds them, "we have less than two hours. We _gotta_ find the scepter."

Gabbie, as always, has her priorities in order. _"Nobody_ liked my small dick joke? Seriously?"

 _"I_ liked it," says Tana.

 

Joey's glad that they found the tears, but they still have a scepter to recover. "Wait." He walks up to the ice statue that was once Torhild the Undying. "Guys. Is _this_ the scepter?"

 _"Is_ it?" asks Alex.

Joey examines Torhild's weapon. "No, it's his axe." Now he feels stupid.

"I'm gonna go back over here," says Gabbie, wandering towards a pond. "Just in case."

Alex sighs. "Man. Where could this be?" He stares at the sky. "Make sure to look up!"

"If I was a scepter," Joey mutters to himself, "honestly, I feel like I would be up _here..."_

"He said it was a Moss King that had the scepter," Tyler reminds them.

Finally, Alex shouts "Found it!" and shows off a greenish-brown scepter. "I found it in the moss!"

"Awesome!" exclaims Tyler.

Joey breathes a sigh of relief.

 

They did it. They've recovered both the fairy's tears _and_ the Moss King's scepter. Andrea is _more_ than ready to free the warrior and get this crazy story moving.

"Now that we have everything we need, what do we do?" Alex wants to know. "What does the incantation say?"

Joey reopens the spellbook and reads.

_Spell to reverse ice curse: Place the scepter at the base of the subject and sprinkle the fairy tears on their eyes. Then, move twenty paces from the subject before reciting the words of the spell._

Alex holds up the scepter. "Put this at the bottom?"

"Yeah, at his feet," Joey replies.

Alex places the scepter at the feet of the ice warrior.

"All right, who has the tears?" is Joey's next question.

Andrea holds up the tear bottle. _This is it._ She takes a deep breath and turns to face the sculpture. _This is my job. If I screw this up, we'll never be able to get out of here._

"Sprinkle it on his eyes," Joey instructs her.

"On his _eyes?"_

"Yeah."

"Everybody back up twenty paces!" Alex barks at the rest of the group.

As her friends step away from the warrior, Andrea sprinkles the fairy's tears onto the icy pits that are his eyes. What was that? Did something move? Or is her imagination playing tricks on her again?

"It's on his eyes," she reports. "Walk to the back."

Once everyone's at the proper distance away from the ice statue, they turn their attention back to the spellbook. "We should recite it together again," says Gabbie, so they do.

_"Lova termara en trunpla."_

Mist peels away from the statue.

"Oh!" gasps Alex. "Something's happening!"

_"Yala onna. Brugollach en trumpla."_

"The curse is breaking!"

"He's _melting!"_

The YouTubers watch as ice melts away, leaving behind a flesh-and-blood warrior. He lets out a ferocious yell and charges at them. They cower, and for a moment, Andrea worries that this man might hurt them, but he stops himself just in time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The (unwanted) return of Liza's murderer. Also, Tana feels useless, Alex and Joey play with stones, and a heroic sacrifice is made.


	33. Torhild the Undying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Torhild the Undying on their side, our heroes can do anything...even confront the two harpies who killed Liza and Sampson earlier.

_"Torhild the Undying was such a warrior."_

And now, he is here.

Furs are slung against his right shoulder in a half-hearted attempt to cover up his otherwise bare chest. His wild beard has never seen a razor. He peers at the YouTubers through incredulous yet kind eyes. "You freed me from that frozen tomb!" His voice is as rough as sandpaper. "I am in your debt."

 _Finally!_ Tana feels like jumping up and down. _Someone who is indebted to us! And he's hot, too! Maybe he can save us from this mess!_

"Can you help us defeat the ice queen?" Andrea requests.

Torhild nods solemnly. "Yes. I will. You'll have to follow me."

"Okay, daddy!" coos Tana, batting her eyelashes at Torhild. "I'll follow you anywhere!" If she somehow gets a date with this legendary warrior, maybe tonight won't be a _complete_ disaster.

"Can you carry me, boo-boo?" Gabbie moans.

Tyler rolls his eyes at the girls. "Everybody calm down."

 

They creep into a clearing. "This is where the harpies lie," Torhild tells them. "Should they attack, mind their claws. They carry a poison that can fell a northern mammoth. Look."

Two harpies sit together at the fountain. Andrea recognizes one of them as the same orange beast that slit Sampson's throat. Then, she sees the other's blue plumes, and her heart sinks into the ground.

Gabbie's voice shakes. "Those are the things that killed Liza!"

Liza's name prompts a hiss from the blue harpy, and both birds attempt to attack the group. "Get back, creature," growls Torhild as he rushes to defend the cowering YouTubers, "before I cleave your head from your shoulders!"

"Torhild the Undying has taken up the company of outsiders," snickers the blue harpy. It spits at his feet.

Torhild's eyes flicker with protective fury. "Mock me again, bird, and your blood will spill. Now hear their words!"

This is Andrea's cue. She steps forward, attempting to disguise her fear with quiet patience. "We need the Talisman." The words stick against her throat, and she tries not to think about Liza's final moments.

"Do you have any idea of the price we paid to obtain it?" hisses the blue harpy.

"Can we trade you?" asks Alex. "Can we do something?"

The orange harpy whispers in the blue one's ear, and after some deliberation, the blue one nods and raises a hand at the group. "Here are the terms, and we will accept no others. Four of you will be placed on the edge of the fountain as witnesses. Two of you will face us in a game of stones." Its face breaks into a maniacal snarl. "If one of you loses, all four outsiders will be slain. If both of you can win, the Talisman is yours. Decide who plays!"

"Wait, wait, wait, guys," Gabbie stammers. "Did they just say that if you guys lose, _all four_ of the people on the edges die?"

Andrea winces. _Yes, Gabbie. That is exactly what they said. If we mess this up, the majority of us will suffer Liza's fate._ She shudders at the unwanted memories.

 

Tana wants nothing more than to give Liza's murderers a good kick in the teeth. Since she can't do that, she can at _least_ beat them at stones. "I'm, like, _pretty_ good at checkers." This is it. This is her chance to prove herself to the team. She _can't_ let them down.

Gabbie shakes her head. "We're gonna put our faith in—"

"Wait!"

"I love you, but..." Gabbie's loud voice overpowers Tana's meek tones. "Baby girl! No!"

Tana tries to state her case, but she's shut down by a chorus of disapproving groans. _Come on, guys!_ she longs to scream. _I want to help! I want to do something! I'm tired of standing in the shadows! I can do this! Let me do this! Please!_

She is ignored.

"Alex and Joey," decides Andrea. "I trust you guys."

Tyler seconds the motion. "I feel good about that."

"Can you play checkers?" Gabbie questions the boys.

Joey nods.

"I can play checkers," says Alex.

"All right. Come on."

So it's decided. Alex and Joey will play stones against the harpies. Tana feels hurt that her friends wouldn't let her get out there and play, especially since their lives _literally_ depend on this game of stones. If she's going to die, she wants to die fighting for her life, not die due to someone else's failure.

 

"Okay, okay!" snaps Joey as the harpies push him into position. "I got it! You don't have to manhandle me! Gosh!"

He and Alex face the harpies across a pair of game boards, while the other four YouTubers take their places around the fountain. Tyler gulps. He trusts Alex and Joey, but a smudge of doubt still lingers in his soul. After all, they _both_ must win. If _one_ of them loses, the harpies will win, and everyone on the outside _(including me!)_ will die.

_Come on, Alex. Come on, Joey. You can do it. You can save us._

"The first player to stack three stones is the victor," says Liza's killer, who's playing against Alex. "The outsiders go first."

The games begin. Alex and Joey both make their first move against the harpies, and the harpies are quick to fire back. "Alex, concentrate and take your time," advises Andrea. "Do not rush."

"Slow and steady," murmurs Tyler, his eyes fixed on Alex. The Novelist is doing well so far; one of his pieces is already two-thirds of the way across the board. "Good job."

"Alex, how are you doing?" Joey calls to his fellow player.

"I'm doing good," Alex replies. "I'm almost about to stack one."

Gabbie claps and cheers. Tyler wants to do the same, but his hands shake too much to do anything.

Just as he promised, Alex stacks his first stone in record time. The harpy he's playing against grunts in anger. Alex grins. "You should've practiced," he taunts.

 _Yeah!_ cheers Tyler's mind. _Take that! You're going_ down, _you disgusting Liza-killer!_

"Go ahead!" says Joey, who has yet to stack a stone. "It's your turn, miss!" Then, the orange harpy jumps two spaces, and Joey's expression crumples with shock. "No! That's not how it works! Go back!"

Alex is encountering the same problem with the blue harpy. "You can _do_ that?!?"

"She jumped two!" complains Andrea. "She's cheating! She's cheating!"

"She's _definitely_ cheating!" Joey jabs a furious finger at the orange harpy. "You just cheated!"

"I moved one space!" insists the blue harpy.

"You think me blind?" bellows Torhild. "You cheat!"

"Calling me a _liar?"_ the harpy scoffs.

Torhild does not back down. "I am!"

The blue harpy shrieks into the air, then throws up its hands. "Kill them!"

 _Oh, God._ Tyler's body is paralyzed with terror. _We screwed up. We pissed them off. They're going to kill us._ He thinks of Liza. _I'm going to die like she did._

 

Alex opens his mouth to beg for his friends' lives, but nothing comes out. _I did this,_ he thinks. _I should've kept quiet about the cheating. I should've just let it go. Now, they're_ all _about to die, and it's my fault. I failed them._

"Get back!"

A ferocious voice echoes across the clearing, and Torhild the Undying leaps to their aid. He pushes Alex out of harm's way and plunges into a fight with both harpies at once. Eventually, he corners the blue one, traps its in his bone-crushing grip, and snaps its neck. Its corpse falls to the ground.

Alex smiles at the harpy's death. _If there's a heaven,_ he chuckles to himself, _Liza's up there, cheering Torhild on._

Then, Torhild doubles over, a pained expression on his face, and Alex realizes that the harpy's claws must've scratched him during the scuffle. "He's hurt!"

The orange harpy, enraged at the death of its friend, flings itself onto Torhild's back. "Get off me!" Torhild howls, and the two of them brawl for a bit before Torhild finally sends the harpy tumbling off his back and onto the ground. Gabbie and Tyler gasp.

As Torhild tries to catch his breath, the harpy climbs to its feet and prepares to make a second attack. Alex shouts a warning to Torhild, who effortlessly pulls the creature into his arms as it charges at him. To finish it off, he lifts it into the air, roars, and breaks its spine over his knee.

"Omigod," breathes Tyler.

Torhild collapses.

"Are you okay?" Alex shouts. He wants him to be okay, but his heart already knows that Torhild the Undying is going to die.

Joey mutters "let's go look" and runs over to Torhild. Everyone else follows suit. The warrior clutches an open wound that is clearly the work of the harpies.

"Their claws," sighs Andrea. "Their claws got him. They have the poison in their claws."

Joey's eyes widen with understanding. "Are you poisoned?"

"I'll suck it out!" offers Tana.

Torhild struggles to breathe. "My time in this world is over," he groans through gritted teeth.

Tyler looks distraught. "There's nothing we can do?"

"Get the Talisman from the Crimson Pool," is Torhild's strained reply.

He's dying. This man, this warrior, who spent God knows how long under an ice witch's curse, has used his only shot at freedom to save a group of strangers. He sacrificed his life for them. He's the hero that Alex knows he'll never be.

Alex picks up the axe that Torhild dropped and hands it back to him. "It's a hero's death," he tells the fallen fighter.

Torhild takes the axe. "Thank you."

 _No. Thank_ you, _Torhild. Thank you for everything._

 

"The pool!" Andrea cries, pointing to a nearby pond with red lights reflecting on its water.

"Yeah." Joey leaves Torhild's side and uses a group of stepping stones to cross the pool. "Hold on to me," he instructs Alex, who does. Once he's close enough to the Talisman, Joey grabs it, and it glows with a pale blue light.

"Good job!" says Tyler.

Andrea beams. _"Hell_ yeah."

"We got it." Joey returns to the dying Torhild, desperate for whatever last bits of guidance the warrior can provide. "What do we do with the Talisman? What do we do now?"

"Kill that ice witch," gasps Torhild. Those are his last words.

"She's here!" shouts Gabbie. "Guys!"

"She" turns out to be the woodland woman from earlier. "You truly are the heroes of the prophecy." Her smile turns sad for a moment when she sees Torhild's corpse, but she pulls herself together within two seconds. "Follow me to the Path. You will need the Talisman to get past its Guardian."

 

Gabbie reluctantly leaves Torhild's body behind. _Such a_ shame _that all the good ones keep dying,_ she sighs. _We could've had something. I guess I'm doomed to be alone forever._

"Hey, we're Postmating you a Band-Aid," Alex whispers to Torhild.

"Thanks, babe!" says Tyler.

They move on. "Wow," Alex muses to the group at large. "He sacrificed himself for us." He sounds almost jealous.

The group walks all the way around the house without a word. Gabbie tries to think of something to say, but she can't think of anything beyond _phew, thank God those harpies are gone._ Now, if only she could get her hands on those stupid Dark Army and Confederate soldiers, she'll have avenged _both_ of her fallen friends. But, as it is, she'll have to be content with knowing that the monsters who killed Liza will never hurt anyone again.

Soon, they catch sight of the weirdest guard that Gabbie's ever seen. "Oh, no," grumbles Alex. "Who's that?"

"What the heck?" Joey exclaims.

"He's guarding something," Andrea points out.

The guard wears a white robe. His face looks like it's been carved from frozen stone, and he carries the biggest sword any of them have ever seen. "If you seek the Unquenchable Fire," he says in a gravelly voice, "two must be chosen to walk the Path of Betrayal."

Of course. Of _course_ they have to pick two people to do something creepy. Someone's gonna die, too, probably. Wonderful! Just what Gabbie always wanted!

 _God,_ she hates this house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The shortest Voting Time in the history of Escape the Night. Also, Tyler demands fair play, and Tana loves you all.


	34. It's Only Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two among them must walk the Path of Betrayal. Who will go, and who will stay?

Another challenge lies before them, and as far as Tyler's concerned, there's only one choice. "If we have to send in two people," he says calmly, "I feel like it should be two people that haven't proven themselves yet."

"Joey and Andrea?" Gabbie asks.

Alex nods. "They're the only ones."

"I feel like that's easy." Everyone else has risked their lives, so Tyler figures it's about time that Joey and Andrea risk their lives as well. "That's easy and fair."

Joey, to his credit, takes this suggestion pretty well. "Okay." He shrugs. "I guess we're going in."

Tyler turns to Andrea. "Don't you think that's fair?" _Please don't be mad at me, Andrea. You're my friend. I don't want you to die. I just want to make sure that everyone gets the same shot as everyone else._

"You haven't, I haven't, let's go in," is Andrea's brisk response.

"Yeah, you're right," Joey admits. "It is fair."

Tyler bristles with guilt. _No matter who dies in there,_ he realizes, _it's on me._ His sense of fair play has just condemned one of his friends to a terrible fate, and he's not prepared to face the consequences.

 

Andrea's been expecting this. Really, it was only a matter of time before someone chose her for a death challenge. She's just glad that Tyler was upfront and rational about it.

She's _also_ glad that her opponent is Joey Graceffa. Host or no host, he doesn't strike her as _that_ strong of an adversary.

"Omigod." Joey sucks in a nervous breath. "Okay."

"Guys, you can do this," Gabbie insists, but her words sound hollow, as if hope is nothing more than a formality.

Tyler says "we believe in you" in a sorrowful voice.

Alison gives Andrea her golden cape. "Thank you," Andrea murmurs, taking it and wrapping it around her shoulders. The fabric brushes against her skin in a way that's almost reassuring. Almost.

 

As Joey fastens Andrea's cape, he considers his odds. Andrea has yet to prove herself in a challenge, so he feels pretty good...but, at the same time, this is the girl who drank blood from a vampire. She's tough. He's going to have to watch himself.

The ice guard hands them a scroll, which Andrea reads aloud.

_Along the Path are five riddle boxes, each containing a key. To make it past the second Guardian, you will need to gather three keys. You must each walk the path separately, and only one of you will be able to gather enough._

"Here's the talisman," says Joey, handing it to the ice guard. Then, to Andrea, "Ready?"

Andrea nods, and together, they enter the Path of Betrayal.

 

This is Tana's least favorite part. Watching her friends disappear...knowing that one of them is most likely _never_ coming back...it wounds her heart. She _hates_ this game. She's _tired_ of saying goodbye.

"We love you," she calls after their fading figures.

They do not respond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Joey and Andrea walk a treacherous road, and as always, their task ends with murder.


	35. The Path of Betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrea and Joey follow the Path of Betrayal to its deadly destination.

The Path is dense, dark, and deep. Trees surround Joey and Andrea like pensive mourners at a funeral. The dense foliage is almost enough to convince Joey that this place is doing its best to suffocate them. _I hate this._ He swallows a lump of unease. Is this the end? Is he going to die? Does he _deserve_ to die?

He doesn't know.

"Oh." He's the first to spot a riddle box. "Okay."

"Where's the box?" yells Andrea, who's exploring the other side of the path.

Joey runs over to his box, unwraps the riddle, and reads it to himself.

_You feel yours, but never see it and never will._

Joey frowns. "Soul?" He attempts to insert the word "soul" into the combination, but it fails. He's wrong. He can't think of anything. "I have to find a different one."

 

Andrea's having trouble finding a riddle box, which is discouraging, and a part of her begins to worry that she might lose this game. But when she hears Joey struggling to solve his own riddle, her spirits soar. _We're on equal ground. I still might have a chance._

There's a riddle box hidden on top of a pillar. "Hell yeah!" She grabs it.

_Thirty white horses on a red hill. First they champ, then they stamp, then they stand still._

She tries twenty different words, but none of them are right. This riddle is _hard._ "I have no clue what this could mean," she sighs, twisting the combination around in circles. At this rate, she's not even going to get _one_ correct, let alone _three._

Joey has found a different riddle box. "I don't know what to do!" he shouts. "Should we work together on this?"

"Yeah." As much as Andrea wants to live, Joey _does_ have a point. Two heads are better than one. "If we work together, at least..."

Joey nods. "If we get to the second stage, we'll take it from there, but I don't know if we can do this."

"Okay. What does yours say?"

_Runs smoother than any rhyme. Loves to fall, but cannot climb._

"Loves to fall, but cannot climb..." The words tumble through Andrea's brain as she searches for their meaning. "Ocean?"

"Oh!" Joey exclaims. "Waterfall! Fall!"

There aren't enough letters in the combination for _that_ to be the answer, and yet, Andrea is _positive_ they're on to something. "Try water."

Joey tries water. It works. "Okay, this one was water. Is the key in here?" A small yellow key falls into his palm.

"Okay." They've done it. They finally have a key. "Try this one." She thrusts her white horses riddle at him, glad that they have one last opportunity to work together before the tragedy that awaits them.

 

_Thirty white horses on a red hill. First they champ, then they stamp, then they stand still._

At first, Joey can't make heads or tails out of this horse story, but Andrea's thoughts provide some insight. "First they chomp, then they stomp," she recites.

_"Teeth!"_

That's the answer. They retrieve the second key.

"All right." Joey's grateful for Andrea's company. Without her, he'd probably still be stuck on that first riddle. "We have two keys."

Andrea smiles. "How many more do we need? Three?"

It doesn't take long for them to find their third and final riddle, since it's the one that Joey abandoned earlier. He reopens it and shows it to Andrea.

_You feel yours, but never see it and never will._

"Lungs?" ponders Joey. "Air?"

"Heart," is Andrea's answer.

She is correct, and the last key is recovered.

As they run to the second ice guard, Joey fights to ignore the betrayal that's yet to come. "What's gonna happen when we go past him?" _Andrea's my friend. I can't betray her._

 _Didn't stop you from betraying Liza,_ sneer his demons.

They reach the second guard. "We have the three keys," says Joey, presenting them to her (it's a her this time).

She hands them the torch of Unquenchable Fire. "Lift high in the air to melt the heart of the Ice Witch."

With freezing hands and heavy hearts, Joey and Andrea enter the cave.

 

Andrea's anxious. She and Joey have been working together incredibly well, and slowly but surely, he's carving out a soft spot in her heart. But if she wants to leave this path alive, she's going to have to betray him.

The cave contains a small table. Four tablets sit together on the table, along with a note. "What the heck is this?" Joey takes the note and holds it up to the fading light.

"What does it say?" asks Andrea.

_Choose the friend whom you will betray. Smash their name upon the ground, and the Ice Witch will be revealed._

"Oh, _no,"_ Joey groans.

Andrea peeks at the tablets. Four names have been carved into stone. Each name represents a friend who waits for them outside the Path. "Omigod." It all makes sense. "Because it's the Path of Betrayal. We have to betray someone."

"We have to _betray_ someone?!?" Joey gasps.

"We're both safe." Andrea presses a hand against her mouth. "We are betraying someone." She and Joey have both been spared, but now, they must choose a friend to die in their place.

_Gabbie. Alex. Tyler. Tana._

This is the betrayal.

This is the price they pay to stay alive.

 

Joey remembers a journal. He sees himself writing GloZell Green's name on an empty line, damning her to the demons of the house. He thinks of Lele Pons, who was there when he did it, who met her demise five hours later because of his mistakes.

 _Not again,_ screams every molecule in his body. _Never again._

But he must. And it's _worse_ this time. GloZell tried to kill him. GloZell accused him of working with the evil. This time, none of his friends have turned against him (not yet, anyway), so he has _no idea_ who deserves to die.

"Just think about who has been slowing us down," is Andrea's advice.

Joey's gaze falls on Alex's tablet. "Alex has proven himself more than once. We can't choose him. Let's put him up here." As he moves Alex out of harm's way, he feels like an indecisive executioner.

Andrea bites her lip. "I feel like Tyler has as well, though."

"Yeah," Joey agrees, and Tyler's life joins Alex's on the shelf. "So it's between Tana and Gabbie."

_"You are the YouTube killer!"_

"I don't wanna choose," he whimpers in an effort to drive away the ghosts of murders past. "I don't wanna choose." Gabbie and Tana smile at him, love reflected in their eyes. "I can't."

His partner in crime speaks in a flat voice. "I don't wanna choose, either. We have to. Who's been more helpful? Gabbie or Tana?"

"Gabbie has, but I _can't_ do that to Tana..."

"I know."

Joey doubles over with heartache. "I feel so sick to my stomach right now." He turns to Andrea. Her inscrutable expression belongs on Mount Rushmore between George Washington and Thomas Jefferson. "What do you think?" He'll let her decide. He's too much of a coward to take the blame.

 

Andrea doesn't want to betray anyone, but at the end of the day, _hell yeah_ she's going to save her own life if she gets the opportunity. It's only a matter of _who_ she's willing to sacrifice.

"I mean, obviously Tana," she says. "For me." She remembers Jesse Wellens, dead because Tana wasn't fast enough. "The challenge that Tana and Gabbie did...Tana technically lost. I feel like, from her loss, now's her time to die." She hands the Unquenchable Fire to Joey, takes a deep breath, and picks up Tana's tablet. "Want me to smash it?"

Joey throws up his hands. "You do it." He's looking a little green around the gills, just like Tyler did before he barfed up all those sweets. "I can't. I can't. I can't."

 _Omigod._ The tablet shivers in her hands. _I'm about to kill Tana. I'm about to end the life of another human being. In a few moments, I'll be a murderer._

"Ready?"

"I can't look," Joey moans.

Andrea closes her eyes. She has no choice. She _has_ to do this. This is a death game. Someone must die, and Tana hasn't done enough to stay alive.

_"We love you."_

The tablet with Tana's name on it shatters against the snow.

 

Tyler is the first to see the ice guard's eyes grow wide. At first, he dismisses it as his paranoia getting the best of him. _He's a guard. Guards are supposed to be vigilant. I've_ got _to stop being such a worrywart._

But then, the guard steps towards the group, his sword prepared to strike, and Gabbie notices as well. "Guys." She grabs Tyler's sleeve. Her nervousness morphs into full-blown fear as the guard comes closer. "Guys!"

Tyler instinctively throws himself in front of Alex and Gabbie, doing his best to shield them from the blade, but Tana is too far away for him to protect. The ice guard ignores the three-person cluster and, much to everyone's horror, advances on the terrified Saloon Girl.

Gabbie's voice is a desperate shriek. "No! Don't stab!"

"No," stammers Tana as she backs away. "No, no, no, no…"

Everyone shouts a string of pleas at the guard, begging him not to do what they think he's going to do. _You can't._ Tyler feels like he's trapped in a nightmare. _You_ can't _kill her. That's against the rules. If_ we _can't go against the rules, why should you?_

 

Tana doesn't understand. Is this man, this ice guard, going to kill her? Now? In front of everyone?

Why?

"What did I do?" she begs her assailant, her eyes moist with tears. This can't be happening. She wasn't voted in, Joey and Andrea were, it's not fair it's not fair _it's not fair._ "What did I do?"

Cold steel rips through her stomach, and as she falls backwards into the darkness of death, those four words play on repeat throughout her crumbling brain.

_What did I do? What did I do? What…did I…_

 

Tana Mongeau dies on the grass, and Gabbie's heart dies with her.

_"Tana!"_

Gabbie flings herself at Tana's body. "Omigod!" she wails. "What just happened?" She uses her shaking fingers to search for any signs of life, but there are no miracles in this godforsaken place. "She's _dead!_ And I thought it was one of them!" Tears clog her throat. "What is happening?!?"

"Omigod," is all Tyler has to say about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Tana. You were the cinnamon roll of the group, and it is a truth universally acknowledged by all death-ridden fandoms (Fight of the Living Dead, Game of Thrones, Danganronpa, and so on) that The Cinnamon Roll Always Dies.  
> Next chapter: Joey and Andrea aren't _quite_ out of the woods yet.


	36. A Pointless Sacrifice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Joey and Andrea's choice, Tana Mongeau is dead. But there's still an ice witch to get rid of.

Somewhere, Tana Mongeau is dying. Perhaps she's already dead. Her soul, like the souls of so many others, will haunt Joey's heart until the day he dies.

But there's no time to think about his crimes. The Ice Witch is here.

She is a paragon of frosty danger. Her hair is white, her skin is pale, her low-cut dress shimmers with blue light, and her ice-themed makeup gives her an aura of dark invincibility. She regards Andrea and Joey through cold, lifeless eyes, then moves to cast a spell.

"No." Joey takes aim at her with the Unquenchable Fire. "No!"

The fire glows. The Ice Witch screams as she melts into pink smoke.

Joey inspects her remains. "Where's the gem? Did she leave the gem?"

"Wait. What is this?" Andrea pulls a piece of paper out from underneath the Ice Witch's abandoned dress. "It's a letter."

_Your path is complete. Return to your friends._

"What the heck?" complains Joey.

They search the dress, the table, and the ground, but no gem turns up. "We don't have the gem!" Andrea cries. "She didn't leave us the gem!"

This is bullshit. They completed the Path. They betrayed Tana. They did _everything_ they were supposed to do. Where's the gem? They were _promised_ a gem. Is the Sorceress messing with them? Was all of this just a pointless side quest that, in the end, meant nothing?

If that's the case, then Tana died for nothing. Joey broke his own heart for nothing.

He wants to kill the Sorceress himself.

 

"Tana's a martyr," sobs Gabbie, her tears watering Tana's fatal wound. She thinks of the conversation they had an hour ago, and it hits her: they're _never_ going to have that movie night. _Gone_ are the days of collabs and friendship. All that's left is Gabbie, alone, with an aching heart and a mind that can't comprehend why that stupid ice guard decided to cut Tana down.

 _She wasn't even in the battle,_ she sniffles to herself. _Why did she have to die? Why does this house have to kill everyone I care about?_

"Guys!" yells Alex, pointing.

Andrea and Joey have returned. Gabbie, Alex, and Tyler stand up to face those whose lives were _supposed_ to be in danger.

"Tana's gone," says Alex.

Gabbie's eyes sting with tears. "Tana's dead."

Joey's eyes are glazed over. "We had to walk the Path of Betrayal," he explains, "and we had to betray one of you guys."

Andrea's voice trembles with guilt. "We had to choose somebody."

Gabbie stares at them. _They killed her,_ she thinks. _They were the ones who took Tana away. I mean, I'm glad they didn't kill_ me, _that would've been awful, but why couldn't they have killed Tyler? He's a much better competitor. And he's not Tana. He's nice, but he's not Tana._

Then, with a jolt, _Oh, God. Tana wanted to help play stones, and we didn't let her. Is that why they chose her to die?_

It takes all of her willpower not to lose herself in shame.

 

Once again, Alex has failed. He promised himself that he'd get Tana out of here, and what happened? She was betrayed, attacked, and murdered. Their alliance fell apart before it had a chance to get off the ground.

 _You should've done something,_ he scolds himself. _You should've saved her. Now, she's gone, just like Lauren and Liza, and it's all your fault. You're a terrible ally._

"Did you face the ice queen?" Gabbie asks.

"Yes," Andrea replies. "We killed the ice queen."

Joey holds up a torch. "We killed her with this."

"Did you get the gem?" is Tyler's question.

"No."

What? No? But that's the whole point! They're _supposed_ to get a gem every time someone dies! Otherwise, why bother? Why play this game if there's nothing to gain from playing it?

The woodland woman, whose name is Sireen, emerges from the shadows. "I am sorry for your loss," she says, "but you have saved our entire land. And for that, I am forever in your debt." She reaches into her bag and pulls out a crystal. "This contains a piece of my magic."

Joey gasps. "The gem?"

"No," sighs Andrea.

"May it serve you well," continues Sireen.

"That's not it!" Joey protests. "That's not the gem!"

But Sireen ignores him. "It is time to leave now, before the Sorceress finds her way here again."

"Let's go back to the room and regroup," suggests a crestfallen Andrea.

So they head back to the house, leaving Tana's body on the grass. Alex's mind sends him thoughts of Tana from when she was still alive—laughing, joking, messing around, causing those around her to break into grins—and he wilts. She should've lived. She _deserved_ to live. She didn't deserve to become a victim of the Path of Betrayal.

Now, Tyler is all that's left of Alex's promise. He's his last chance to save someone he cares about.

_Ty, I'll get you out of here. I won't let you die._

But as they reenter the parlor, Alex realizes that his promises mean nothing to this place.

 

Tyler just lost one of his closest allies to a _betrayal_ of all things. How does he know he can trust those who remain? What if they turn on _him_ next? What if they're not who he thought they were?

"Is it every man for himself now?" he asks the people who are supposed to be his friends.

"No," says Andrea.

Gabbie shakes her head. "I think we still need to work together."

"One hundred percent we do," Joey agrees.

Tyler looks the Savant square in the eye. "Well," he snaps, pain and distrust in his voice, "that didn't help Tana."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The five surviving YouTubers learn what love is. They are not impressed.


	37. Self-Destruct

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guests are thrown into a world of machines, blueprints, and puzzles. Can they navigate their new environment successfully? Or is this the end for them all?

Silence rules the parlor. Gabbie remembers a funeral from what seems like forever ago, where people took to a podium to extol the virtues of Shane Dawson. _If I die here,_ she wonders, _who will be left to speak for me?_

Joey ruins the moment. "Well, Tana's dead now," he says, as if he's discussing the weather.

"And we have no gem," adds Tyler.

Alex's eyes travel to Sireen's crystal in Joey's hand. "All we have now is this crystal."

"She just killed one of us because we weren't playing by her rules," Tyler gripes, "and now, we play by her rules, and she doesn't give us a gem?"

"A life doesn't equal a gem at this point," says Joey.

Gabbie stares at the wall. "There _are_ no rules," she snarls, her voice bitterly low. "It doesn't matter _who_ goes into these little battles to the death. _Somebody's_ going to die. We just don't know who." Tana wasn't voted into the challenge, and she died anyway. No gem. No hope. This is stupid. Nothing matters. They're probably gonna run out of people before they're done with this mess.

 _Don't give up!_ her spirit shouts. _You'll survive! You just gotta stay strong!_

Fine. She'll continue to play this game. She's just not sure how much longer she can keep playing before she falls apart.

"I still don't understand," Joey sighs. "There's _gotta_ be something more to that."

All of a sudden, a horrifying siren noise fills the room. Tyler jumps. A few people scream. Gabbie scrambles to her feet, ready to find whatever is making that racket and punch it until it stops.

"My God," gasps Andrea. "Wow."

 _"The home defense system has been enabled,"_ says a voice, leaving Gabbie to wonder where the hell the "home defense system" was when all that _other_ crazy shit was happening. _"The estate is secure."_

A door swings open.

"Let's go," says Tyler, and they all parade through the door to whatever comes next.

 

There's a siren going off, and that could mean _anything._ Tyler's praying for a simple task that does _not_ involve _anything_ weird, scary, or dangerous, but he's not getting his hopes up.

The five surviving YouTubers enter the adjacent room. They are immediately confronted with a giant machine, complete with a clock that's been set for ten minutes.

"What!" exclaims Alex.

"Wait," grumbles Andrea. "What is this?"

Alex, as usual, is right on top of things. "The next picture was a gear," he says, referring to the symbol on the gem map. "This has to be the next..."

"Okay." Joey's voice trembles. "Wait. There's ten minutes on this clock."

Alex starts examining various parts of the machine. "We have this gear. We have this lock. What else do we have?"

"Look for a clue," suggests Joey.

Alex grabs a small, weird gadget from one of the shelves. "This is new!"

Tyler peers at the lock. It's a fairly straightforward combination lock, complete with a four-number password. "So this means four numbers," he remarks, pointing to the lock. Okay. They can do this. They just have to find the combination. A simple task, really. They're going to be fine.

"Get the new stuff," says Alex as the others find _even more_ small, weird gadgets, "and put it here so we can figure it out."

While Alex supervises the retrieval of the gadgets, Tyler takes a closer look at the machine. He finds a system of gears, along with a note. "Wait. It says 'rotate twice.'"

"We need to find the missing gear right here," adds Alex, gesturing to an empty spot where a gear ought to be.

Gabbie is quick on the uptake. "Is this it?" she asks, holding up the missing gear.

"Yes!" shouts everyone else.

Gabbie hands the gear to Tyler.

"Perfect," says Joey. "Good job."

Tyler pops the gear into place. "Maybe...?"

"Rotate it twice!" Joey instructs him.

Of course, Tyler obeys. He rotates the gear twice, which causes a small drawer to pop open. Andrea fishes a piece of paper out of the drawer and reads it to the others.

_The fuel cell must be secured correctly, or the machine will not run. Once in place, close the panel and pull the lever on the right._

Joey holds up Sireen's crystal. "This is the fuel cell. This crystal."

"That's the fuel cell!" shouts Andrea. "We need to put it in here." She points at a tiny compartment in the machine.

Joey puts the crystal in the compartment, closes it, and nods. "Go ahead."

"Then pull the lever," says Andrea to Tyler.

Tyler pulls the lever, and a projector lights up, illuminating a nearby screen. Tyler's surprised that they're introducing a _movie_ into this nightmare, but it's fine. He'll watch it. As long as it's not one of those movies that brainwashes the viewer (which it _might_ be, considering everything else that's happened so far), they'll be okay.

 

The movie plays, and eventually, the camera settles on the most realistic-looking female robot that Alex has ever seen. "Whoa." She has a pleasant face, springy brown curls, and skin that looks as natural as a human's. If it wasn't for her exposed metal chest, with all its wires and cavities, no one would be able to figure out her true robotic nature. "Okay."

"Pay attention!" instructs Andrea. "It's gonna tell us how to put it together, I think."

"She looks like a robot," says Alex. "A cyborg." He tilts his head, intrigued.

A man enters the frame. His grey mustache bristles, and he stares at the camera with tired eyes. "Subject: Automaton Bride. Attempt 685."

"She's hooked up to a machine," Andrea points out.

Tyler makes a face and mutters "creepy" under his breath.

"She's a cyborg," Alex repeats.

Andrea holds up a ring with a green piece of jewelry attached. "I think I found her wedding ring."

"The generator powering her heart broke under the constant strain," laments the man on the screen. "The friction was just too much." He adjusts the camera, and when he speaks again, his voice has hardened. "I need a human heart to do this. My conscience is torn..."

"Oh, no!" Gabbie gasps.

Andrea's mouth widens into an O. "He's gonna take a human heart."

 _No!_ Alex wants to shout at the screen. _Don't take a human heart! There has_ got _to be a better way to power up your cyborg wife!_

The man fiddles with a familiar lock. "That's _this,"_ says Joey, jabbing a finger at the lock on their machine.

In the film, a girl pops her head through the door, and Alex instantly fears for her life. "I, uh, have a proposal," she says in a sweet voice.

"I'm _recording!"_ the man snaps at her. "Have you no manners?"

"Sorry...I just..."

The movie ends abruptly, but not before the opened lock flashes across the screen.

 

Gabbie's sure glad that everyone still alive is good at memorizing things. Using the bits and pieces that each of them remember, the five YouTubers are able to recreate the code.

"Seventeen-something."

"Seventeen-nine-nine."

"No, it's seven. That's...that's a one."

"It's seven-two-nine-nine."

Joey snaps open the lock.

"Oh, God," moans Andrea. "Stay back."

Joey pulls out a long red container that kinda looks like a Pringles can. (Gabbie realizes that she's hungry again, but she snaps _you just ate_ at her stomach in an effort to calm it down.) Inside are blueprints for the "Automaton Bride" or whatever the hell that weird robot lady was called.

Then, because they can't have nice things, an alarm sounds. _"Critical breach of security. Item number 331 has been compromised."_ A terrible clicking sound sweeps their ears. _"The doors have been locked, and the machine will self-destruct in ten minutes..."_

The timer starts. "Omigod, omigod!" screams Gabbie, her heart thumping a panicked rhythm against her chest. "It's going!" _Great! We're all about to blow up! I hate this goddamn house!_

Alex, as resourceful as ever, tries the door. It's locked, of course.

_"...unless the override protocol is engaged."_

Gabbie grabs that ray of hope with both hands. "Everybody just start looking for parts!" she screeches as she darts around the room like an out-of-control hummingbird.

"Let's look around," says Tyler in a too-calm-to-be-real voice. "Let's look around."

"Just split up," Joey remarks.

"I'm taking the ring!" Andrea announces to everyone. "I feel like it's gonna be very important."

_Whatever. Take your stupid ring. I wanna stay alive._

 

_"The machine will self-destruct in eight minutes."_

Andrea gulps. The ring feels cold between her fingers. _We can't die here,_ she tells herself. _We've come so far. We've lost so much. We_ won't _fall victim to a trigger-happy home defense system._

"Oh!" Alex has just discovered that one of the floor vents is loose. "I found a piece!"

"No way," says Joey.

Alex returns to the machine, part in hand. "I found one piece."

"Guys." Joey holds up a rod of some sort. "Wasn't this from the video?"

 _"The machine will self-destruct in three minutes,"_ booms the voice, and Andrea struggles to maintain a neutral expression. _Oh, God. That's less time than I thought we had._

"Wait!" yells Joey, clutching his rod. "I think we can use this on..."

"On what?"

Sweat dampens the Savant's face. "It's, like, a key for something! What can we plug this into? _Is_ there something?"

Andrea wishes she could answer him.

"Go back to the video," Joey says. "What was this used for?" He flips the projector on, studies the footage for half a sentence, and finds the answer. "Oh!" He points to a keyhole on the machine. "Right here! Right here!"

With some help from Tyler, Joey sticks the rod into the keyhole.

"The clock stopped!" Alex cries.

_"Override protocol engaged."_

They've done it. They've disabled the machine. They can breathe...for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Several new characters are introduced to the story. Also, Tyler steps into a deadly situation, Alex turns into a generic action hero, and Alison shows off her protective side.


	38. Danger Zone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New friends appear, but so do new challenges. Will the group be able to save one of their own from a bomb threat?

The door opens, and the man from the video enters the room. He's got a weapon in his hands, a jetpack on his back, a gem pinned to his chest, and a furious expression on his face.

Joey yelps. He does _not_ have a good feeling about this.

Alex, however, chooses to focus on the positive. "He has a gem."

"You destroyed my life's work!" the man roars at the YouTubers, his voice raw with anger and grief.

"We didn't do anything!" Joey pleads.

But the man isn't listening. He uses his weapon to shoot silvery gas all over the room, sending the group scrambling for cover. Joey screams and shields his face with his hands. _Is that poisonous?_ he wonders. _Is this how we die?_

Fortunately for everyone, the girl from the video chooses now to jump through the door and taze the man. He is frozen in blue light.

The girl exhales. Her blonde hair is so short that it makes her look like Tinker Bell, and her outfit is straight out of a steampunk novel. There's a jetpack on her back as well. "He's only gonna be like that for a couple of minutes," she tells the shellshocked group. "We gotta get out of here."

She charges out the door. Everyone follows her, yelling "Go!" and "Come on!" Alex grabs the blueprints on the way out.

"Who's she?" Gabbie demands to know. "Who _is_ that?"

"What the hell was that?" asks Andrea once everyone's in the hallway.

Joey squints at their new acquaintance, unsure whether or not he can trust her. "Who _are_ you?"

"Jetpack Girl." She grins and shows off her jetpack. "Nice to meet you."

"Who was that?" asks Tyler.

"That," says Jetpack Girl, "was Cedric. My old boss. He's a real asshole sometimes. He built this Automaton Bride to love him forever, but it only awoke long enough to, like, crush his soul." She smiles sheepishly. "But he thinks someone sabotaged her, and right now, he thinks y'all did it."

 _Yeah._ Joey rolls his eyes. _Like I had anything to do with your Automaton Bride._

 

Tyler bites his lip. If Cedric thinks they broke his beloved Automaton Bride, he'll probably stop at nothing to hunt them down. That _does_ not bode well for their chances at survival.

Jetpack Girl (Tyler _still_ can't believe that's her name) claps her hands. "I know what we gotta do! We gotta rebuild his Bride!" She points at the group. "You have the blueprints, right?"

"I have them," says Alex, holding them up for Jetpack Girl to see.

"Awesome!" she chirps.

Tyler's not quite sure why Jetpack Girl is so invested in this, so he takes the time to ask. "What's in it for you?"

"I just..." She lowers her head, a faraway look in her bright eyes. "I just want him to see that I can make something that works, you know?"

"If we do this, are we gonna get the gem?" is Tyler's follow-up question.

She crosses her fingers. "Um...I _think_ we can arrange that?"

"Okay." If there's a gem involved, Tyler will do it. He'll do _anything_ to get himself and his friends out of here.

"Follow me to the lab," says Jetpack Girl. "Watch your ass, because he enabled the home defense system."

As they follow Jetpack Girl down the hallway, Tyler fights to calm his frightened heart. _We almost died back there,_ he realizes. _If Jetpack Girl hadn't saved us, we'd all be dead._ He shudders at the thought.

They reach a doorway. Tyler's the first to step through it, but as soon as he does, he is bathed in an eerie pink light. _"Intruder detected,"_ booms a voice. Everybody screams.

"Shit," groans Jetpack Girl. "You just stepped on a land mine."

 _A land mine?!?_ Terror takes control of Tyler's brain. _I stepped on a land mine. Land mines explode. Does that mean...is this it? Am I about to explode?_

Jetpack Girl attempts to be reassuring. "It's gonna be fine. Stay put. Stay put, or it'll blow your leg off, okay?"

_This is bad._

There's a timer nearby, set for five minutes, and it's already ticking down. "Oh," gasps Jetpack Girl. "That's less time than I thought you had."

That settles it. He's doomed. He, Tyler Oakley, has less than five minutes left to live. If the blast doesn't kill him, the blood loss definitely will.

He stares through desperate eyes at the pinkness around him, breathing heavily in an effort to keep himself from crying. In. Out. In. Out. His chest rises and falls with each second of his life that ticks away. His legs feel heavy. _I'll see Lauren and Tana again,_ he reminds himself, grasping the silver lining of his impending death. _Liza, too. I'll be able to tell her I'm sorry._

"Targets," murmurs Jetpack Girl, gesturing to the tiny targets that litter the room. "Targets. Guns! Of course! We _can_ defuse the bomb. We just have to hit all the targets before time runs out." Then, to Tyler, "Hold on, okay? We can still save you."

"Okay." Hope reenergizes Tyler's soul. "I..." He smiles weakly. "I trust you guys."

 

Jetpack Girl opens a cabinet and hands each of them a laser gun. Andrea's gun is practically weightless in her hands, which surprises her.

Gabbie hoists her gun into the air. "We have to get all of these."

"Quickly," Tyler whimpers.

There are targets as far as the eye can see. Andrea frowns, sets her jaw, cocks her gun, and mutters "okay." This is their job. This is what they have to do to keep Tyler alive. She _can't_ let him down. Not after...

One of her blasts hits a target.

"I got one!" she yells.

"Got one," says Alex matter-of-factly as he shoots a target down.

Joey pouts. _"I_ wanted to be first!" He sneaks up on a target, then blows it away it with a well-timed blast. "Yes!"

"Anyone need ammo?" asks Jetpack Girl.

Tyler's sweating bullets. "Alex!" he cries. "Quicker!"

"Omigod," frets Gabbie as she reloads. "Are we about to lose Tyler?"

 

No. Forget it. This is where Alex draws the line in the sand.

They took Lauren from him. They took Liza. They took Tana. They killed them all, one by one, shattering his heart against the pavement over and over and over and _over_ again. He's not even sure if his heart still _functions_ properly anymore.

But they _can't_ take Tyler too. Alex doesn't care _what_ he has to do, or _how_ many stupid targets he has to shoot down. He will _not_ let them blow his best friend to smithereens. 

Not while he's still got breath in his body.

So he decimates two targets in quick succession. Everyone's hard at work, blasting targets like soldiers on a covert operation. The sounds of _pow-pow-pow-pew-pew-pew_ echo around the room.

"Got one!"

"Got two!"

"Got two!"

"Got three!"

For a few moments, Alex lets himself have fun. He pretends he's an action hero, shooting all the bad guys, racking up points with every hit he scores. It's like the nerf gun wars he used to have with his friends when he was a kid. _This is great._ He smiles for the first time since Tana's death. _I could get used to this._

Then, he catches a glimpse of Tyler's petrified face, and he notices that there are less than three minutes left on the clock, and he pulls himself back into the harsh realities of life and death.

 

So this house wants to play games? Gabbie can play games. Gabbie can play games all goddamn night.

"Omigod," Andrea sighs.

Tyler, bless him, is doing his best to help. "There's some up there," he says, pointing to the staircase, "and there's some up here."

Andrea shakes her head. "Omigod! There's _so_ many!"

Gabbie's honestly lost track of all the targets they've shot down. They have to be at _least_ halfway done, right? They _better_ be. People aren't supposed to explode without a vote. Then again, it's not like this house cares about what's "supposed to" happen, given Tana's fate.

Alex shoots down another batch of targets. "Yes!" cheers Tyler, and Gabbie can almost _see_ the hearts in his eyes. "Good job!"

"Yeah!" Joey pumps both fists in the air after obliterating a target. He runs to Alison, who's gathering ammunition. "I need another one."

She hands him a loaded gun.

"Thank you," he replies.

As for Gabbie herself, she wastes no time in knocking down a target of her own. She does a happy dance on the staircase. "Yes! Got it! Did we get 'em all?"

Is that the last one?

Nope. There are still more targets.

They have less than ten seconds left before Tyler dies.

 

Alex picks off a target in the corner. "There we go," he says with a shrug. _That's the last one. Come on. It's gotta be._

But it isn't. The timer's still going. Tyler's still in danger.

"Did we get them all?" asks Joey.

Andrea nods. "Yes."

"Double check," begs Tyler, his face a deathly white.

Joey stops to catch his breath. "I don't see any more."

"One more," says Alison.

"Thank you, Alison."

One more. _It's here somewhere._ Alex races around the room, his gun at the ready, the final few seconds ticking away. _I gotta find it. I gotta save him. Five seconds. Four. Where_ is _it?_

 

Three seconds remain, and for a moment, Tyler loses hope completely. _I hope it's quick,_ he thinks morosely. _No pain. No time to scream. Just one loud bang…and it'll all be over…_

He braces himself for death.

And then, Alex hits the final target, the landmine deactivates, the sea of pink disappears, and Tyler is safe. _Thank God._

Joey and Alex strike a cool pose.

"Do you think my leg is fine?" Tyler asks.

His friends nod and smile at him. In this moment, Tyler is no longer the bundle of suspicion he was after Tana's death. These people—Alex, Andrea, Gabbie, and Joey—just saved his life. He'd follow them anywhere.

"Okay," says Alex. "We're good."

All of a sudden, Cedric storms into the room, a net-shooting gun in his grasp, screaming "You'll pay for what you've done!" at the top of his lungs. Tyler gulps. _Out of the frying pan and into the fire._

"No!" Alison shields the guests. "Watch out! Watch out!"

Cedric fires. Alison is caught in a net. "No!" sobs Gabbie. "Alison!"

"We gotta get out of here," says Jetpack Girl.

The group continues to follow Jetpack Girl down the hallway, leaving Alison behind. _She's on our side,_ thinks Tyler, wincing as he remembers his earlier distrust of her. _She sacrificed herself for us. She_ cares _about us._

_Please let her be okay._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: How to rebuild an automaton bride in ten easy steps. Also, Gabbie hates everything that has anything to do with any of this.


	39. The Automaton Bride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To appease Cedric's wrath, our heroes must rebuild his precious Automaton Bride. But how, exactly, does one go about building a fully-functioning android without any experience in engineering?

They're in a part of the house they haven't been in before. Gabbie thought they've been _everywhere,_ but apparently, this house is a cavernous pit of rooms that will never end.

"Where _are_ we?" Andrea blinks. "This is...the red hallway..."

Yes. They're in a hallway. And it's red. What an incredible observation from the all-powerful Mystic.

They leave the red hallway and enter a lab of some sort. Broken bits of machinery are scattered everywhere, along with quite a few half-finished robots. The place gives Gabbie the creeps.

Joey has a different reaction. "Okay, not gonna lie, this is actually pretty sick."

That's when Gabbie sees it. "Guys!" She points. "There's the Bride!"

"The Automaton Bride," gasps Joey.

Andrea makes a face. "Ohh-kay," she grumbles.

Alex's eyes grow wide. "She looks so real..."

He's right. The robot lady is just as lifelike as she was in the video. The only differences are the iron mask that covers her face, the open cabinet that sits on her chest, and, of course, the fact that she's _clearly_ broken.

"Okay," says Alex. "Blueprints!" He shows them off, and Joey reads their instructions aloud.

_Gather the raw parts and place them in the elevator at the end of the red hall. If they are correct, the master machine upstairs will assemble them so they can be placed on the Automaton._

Jetpack Girl grabs her weapons and heads for the door. "You guys check it out. I'm gonna go run interference, okay?"

"Okay," the group agrees.

Gabbie's a little nervous to see Jetpack Girl go, especially considering what happened to Alison. What if that nutjob, Cedric or whatever his name is, comes barreling in here again? Who will protect them?

Oh, well. She's better off not thinking about that.

"Everybody, just..." Her breath catches in her throat as she glances once more at the Automaton Bride. Something about that robot creeps her out. "Look everywhere. For everything." _I swear she's staring at me._

 

Alex is the first to find something. "Oh!" He picks up a skinny rod thing that he recognizes from the blueprints. "Here's a piece." He checks the blueprints once more. "There's a lightbulb, a circle thing, and a little other thing, and a thing...there's too many things!"

"I wish Cedric was a little more organized, is all I'm saying," says Gabbie.

Andrea holds up the circle thing. "Is this one?"

"I think it might be!" Joey shouts. "Yeah! Bring it over!"

Gabbie makes a face. "I don't wanna go back there!" she whimpers. "I'm scared! Ew! Gross!" But she goes back there anyway.

The circle thing joins the rod thing, and there are only three things left to find.

 

Tyler admits it: he has _not_ been the most helpful member of this team so far. His friends have done all of the heavy lifting, while he himself has spent most of his time screaming, making faces, and trying not to cry. Really, it's a miracle he hasn't been killed off for "uselessness" by now.

But that's about to change. If he's going to get out of here in one piece, it's time for him to step up his game.

"Omigod!" He sees a piece of machinery and grabs it. "You guys! I found something!"

"Yay, Tyler!" Gabbie cheers.

Tyler beams as he puts the part with the others. This is the first time he's actually _found_ something, and he feels pretty damn proud of himself. _I just gotta keep finding things, and everything will be all right._

Andrea's face scrunches up in concentration. "You said we need a key?"

"Yes," says Joey.

"I just found a whole _bucket_ of keys," Andrea responds, displaying said bucket.

Tyler frowns as he examines the bucket. "That's not good."

Gabbie rolls her eyes. Tyler doesn't blame her.

They search through jars and buckets, behind every inch of space, exploring every weird thing in front of them. At one point, Joey puts on a helmet made out of spare parts and wires, and Tyler suppresses a chuckle. "You're giving me fashion?"

"Zip-a-dee-do-da, zip-a-dee-day," snarks Joey.

 

Joey and Tyler are being themselves, which is great, but Gabbie's not in the mood to deal with their shenanigans right now. They _have_ to find the other two parts before Cedric comes back and kills them all.

"Oh!" Andrea cheers. "I found it!"

"What is it?" asks Joey.

It's another part. "We just need the lightbulb, then," Gabbie remarks, relieved.

"I did it," mutters Andrea to herself.

Then, all of a sudden, Alison arrives, and Gabbie is _beyond_ happy to see the vampire's face. "Alison!"

"We gotta hurry," Alison pants. "Cedric is readying his Promethean men. They're big, robotic monsters."

This scares Gabbie. "Guys, did you hear that? There's _giant robots_ coming to attack us, everybody!" She is _not_ interested in meeting any robots, thank you. _Especially_ not robots that want to kill her. When did this become a _Terminator_ movie, anyway?

"We gotta be quick!" says Tyler.

Alex sighs. "This is _so_ frustrating."

_You can say that again._

 

"Guys," says Alex, "we _have_ to hurry."

 _I know!_ screams Andrea's mind as she continues her search. _You don't have to remind me! I don't want to get killed by robots any more than you guys do!_

Joey, meanwhile, is still messing around with Tyler. "Need a hand?" he snickers, shoving a mechanical hand at the blonde.

"Omigod." Tyler jumps away. "Don't do that."

Finally, Andrea finds the fifth piece under a half-finished bust. "You guys!" She waves it in the air like a trophy, relief flooding her heart. "I found it! Hell yeah! I found three!"

Joey springs into action. "Okay, guys! Quick!"

"Should we take all five?" asks Tyler.

"Put them in the elevator down the red hall," Alex reminds them, pushing his black hair away from his sweat-stained face.

"What's the skinny?" Jetpack Girl reenters the room, her face and clothes stained with both dirt and blood. "I can't hold them off much longer."

Joey grabs a piece. "Everyone take one!"

"Let's go, let's go, let's go," repeats Tyler.

They do. Andrea grabs the parts, and they all follow Jetpack Girl into the red hallway. "Be careful," cautions the thin mechanic. "It's a goddamn war zone out there."

Andrea bites her lip. She is _not_ a fan of war zones.

"Should I have brought my gun?" Gabbie wonders aloud as the group navigates the hallway.

"Come on," whispers Jetpack Girl. "Come on, come on, come on."

They reach the end of the hallway, where an elevator waits for them. "We just place them inside?" Andrea asks. This task is far too easy for her to trust. She can't shake the feeling that something's about to go wrong.

"Wait," says Alex. "Is there anyone in there?"

There isn't.

"Put them on the pedestal," Tyler instructs Andrea, and she does just that. She places all five mechanical parts on the elevator's pedestal.

"Is this all five?" Joey starts counting. "One, two, three..."

"Come on!" shouts Alex.

Joey and Andrea hustle out of the elevator. The door closes behind them, and the five raw pieces are sent upstairs to the master machines. Now, they must wait for the machine to send them what they need to repair the Automaton Bride.

Gabbie notices Jetpack Girl's condition. "When did you get so bloody?"

"She's been holding everyone off," Andrea explains. _And thank God for that._

 

Joey is frightened. He doesn't know what's behind that door, and he's not sure if he _wants_ to know. "You got this, Jetpack Girl?" he breathes in hushed tones, his eyes fixed on their dirtied guide. She nods.

The elevator door opens to reveal...a mechanical hand, together with a weird little gadget that Joey doesn't recognize.

"We gotta put these on the Bride," realizes Andrea.

So they take their new parts and head back down the hallway. Joey's near the back of the pack, his palms sweating, Jetpack Girl's warning about the "Promethean men" scratching the back of his mind. _It's fine._ He crosses his fingers. _We're almost done. We're still alive. We're—_

That is when the Prometheans arrive.

They're terrifying. They're a pair of tall, imposing figures who wear long black coats, thick boots, and gas masks that cover up their faces. They look like they could crush Joey between their fingers in seconds.

Jetpack Girl immediately starts shooting at them. "Go!" she screams over her shoulder.

The YouTubers don't need to be told twice. They run down the hallway as fast as their legs can carry them, and they don't stop until they're safely within the confines of Cedric's lab.

 

"They're coming, they're coming," squeaks Joey through his teeth.

"Put the arm in!" exclaims Alex.

Joey and Tyler scramble to fulfill his request, while Andrea picks up their new gadget. Understanding seeps into her pores. "Wait!" she shouts. "Is this the heart? For sure?" It is. It has to be.

_You thought you needed a human heart, Cedric? Think again._

Gunshots can be heard from outside, and Andrea briefly worries about Jetpack Girl before Joey announces that "the arm is in." Andrea sees this as her cue and immediately places the mechanical heart inside the Bride's chest compartment.

"Put it in there!" says Alex in an encouraging voice. "That's all we have! Ready?"

"Ready," Andrea replies, closing the cabinet. _Please work. Please work. Please work._

Nothing happens.

"Did it work?" Alex asks.

Joey shakes his head. "It's not working."

Andrea wants to scream. "I don't think I put it in right," she rationalizes, hoping to God that their failure is the result of a simple mistake. "Girl, wake up." _Come on,_ she prays. _Don't let Cedric be right. Don't let this thing require a human heart._

 

Alex can't believe this. The Automaton Bride is _supposed_ to come alive and seduce Cedric so they can have that darn gem, but she's still not moving. What _else_ do they have to do?

"She needs electricity!" suggests Joey.

 _Of course! Like Frankenstein!_ Alex turns on a nearby electrical object. "Ready?"

"Okay," says Joey. "It's good."

"Everybody stand back..." _Okay, Bride of Frankenstein, now's your moment. Wake up. Don't let us down._

The Bride remains motionless, but a box pops open, and there's a note inside. Tyler reads it.

_You would never listen to me, even though I was your partner. The thing you must add to your Automaton to bring her to life is a real, beating, human heart, freshly pulled from a living person._

Alex's own heart lurches forward in his chest.

"Well, maybe there's another heart that we can use," says Joey optimistically.

Just then, the Prometheans march into the room. Much to the group's horror, they've captured Jetpack Girl, and one of them has a gloved hand around the back of her throat. She struggles through her tears, but she's clearly outmatched. To make matters worse, Cedric is right on their heels, and he's still got that weird weapon of his.

Alex closes his eyes. He knows where this is going, and he doesn't want to watch another death.

 

"No!" Joey cries. "Not Jetpack Girl! Don't hurt her!"

Tyler's voice is an angry shout. "Let her go!"

Gabbie feels sorry for Jetpack Girl, but she's got other things to worry about. "Everybody back up." _If someone's gotta die, better Jetpack Girl than any of us._

"We're here to help you," Joey tells Cedric.

Cedric is unable to look directly at the YouTubers. "She just needs a beating heart," he murmurs, his tone laced with sadness. "It's what I was afraid to do before." Regret and determination mingle in his eyes. "But no longer. One of you will give up your heart so that she can live, or all of you will die. Select two from among you to do battle with my Prometheans."

Gabbie can't believe it. _One of us real humans has to die so this robot Bride can live?_ She clenches her teeth. _That's some bullshit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Time to vote on who will risk their hearts! Also, Tyler doesn't want to play this game anymore, and Gabbie feels sorry for herself.


	40. Fortune's Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, two YouTubers are about to be sent into a death challenge...but this time, failing the challenge means losing your heart. _Literally._ Who will be selected?

The Prometheans release Jetpack Girl. She staggers into a table, gulping down air in an effort to catch her breath.

"All right, everyone." Alison's voice is hollow. "I think we know how this goes."

"I hate this part," Joey complains.

 _So do I._ Tyler owes his _life_ to these people. He doesn't want to send them to their deaths. "What if we _all_ put our names in," he suggests in a small voice, "and she just picks two?"

 _Tyler!_ screams the coward in him. _What are you doing? You're going to get yourself killed!_

 _I don't care. I'm_ done _betraying my friends. It's time for everyone to work together._

"I like that idea," says Alex.

Joey nods. "Let's do it."

Tyler takes an anxious breath. He remembers the fate that will befall the loser of this challenge, and he shudders. _Don't let it be me. Please, God, don't let it be me._

 

Joey is the first to vote, and he _hates_ it. He doesn't want to go in there. He has a good heart, and he doesn't want it wasted on this Automaton Bride. He doesn't know her. Why should he go along with Tyler's plan?

 _"I don't have anything against you guys,"_ insists a familiar voice. _"I'm going to vote for myself."_

He clenches his jaw. For Lele's sake, he'll fight these twisted rules.

He takes a deep breath, picks up a Savant card, and holds it high for everyone to see. "Joey." His name trembles on his lips. He gives the card to Alison, crossing his fingers behind his back as he returns to the group.

Andrea is next. She wriggles a Mystic card in front of them. Then, Gabbie shows off a Vaudevillian card, a blank expression on her once-vibrant face.

"My heart is racing," Joey remarks as Tyler stoically displays his Thespian card. Then, as a quick bit of damage control, "Actually, my heart is really slow, and it's not a good heart to have."

 

Alex is last. He takes a Novelist card and hands it over without much fanfare. He's willing to go against these Promethean men, not because he wants to, but because he feels like he's the most capable in the group.

Alison draws a card.

"Alex."

"Uh oh," chuckles Joey.

This is fine. Alex is fairly confident that he'll make it out of this challenge alive. And if he fails...if they _do_ tear out his heart...well, it'll be a fitting metaphor for what has happened to him tonight.

"You can do this," says Gabbie. "You're the strongest one out of all of us."

Tyler pats Alex on the back, and Alex's stomach sours as he realizes that someone else must go in there with him. "Who is my opponent?" _Don't say Tyler. Don't say Tyler. Don't._

 

 _Alex will be okay,_ thinks Gabbie. _He's tough. He can handle himself. Honestly, I feel sorry for whoever has to go against him._

"Gabbie."

Of course. Of _freakin'_ course. Gabbie bows her head in defeat. "Okay," she sighs, kicking herself for agreeing to Tyler's stupid plan.

"It's up to you guys," says Tyler nonchalantly.

 _I'm not gonna die._ Gabbie thinks of her family. _I'm not gonna die._ She thinks of her friends. _I'm not gonna die._ She glances at Alex. _Oh, God, I'm_ so _gonna die._

 

On one hand, Tyler is _beyond_ relieved that his heart isn't going anywhere near Cedric's grubby fingers. On the other hand, he's scared for Alex and Gabbie, and he isn't even sure if this challenge is going to guarantee them a gem. What if someone loses a heart for nothing?

Alex wraps an arm around him. "Tyler," he whispers, "you're tougher than you think you are. If I don't make it..." He almost tears up. "You gotta live. Okay?"

"Okay." As much as he loves Gabbie, Tyler wants Alex to win. He deserves it. He's braver, stronger, and smarter than anyone else here. If only one YouTuber survives the night, it should be (and, to be honest, most likely _will_ be) Alex Wassabi. "I'll try."

"Promise?"

"Promise." _Please don't leave me._

 

Gabbie hugs Joey, then turns her attention to Andrea. "Bye, Mystic." She hugs her. "Sorry I gave you such a hard time."

"It's all right," says Andrea, because there's nothing else to say.

Once Alex and Gabbie are done saying goodbye to everybody, they follow Alison, Cedric, Jetpack Girl, and the Prometheans out the door. _Someone's heart is going to be ripped from their chest,_ thinks Andrea as she watches them go. _This is probably the most brutal challenge we've ever encountered._

She, Joey, and Tyler stand together in the darkness of Cedric's lab, waiting for this saga's sick conclusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Alex and Gabbie solve puzzles, do battle with Prometheans, and try their best to avoid a brutal demise. One can live. One must die. How is this latest nightmare going to end?


	41. Heartless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabbie and Alex have both been heartbroken by this house before, but now, one of them is about to _actually_ have their heart ripped out. The only way to survive is to play the Prometheans' game.

Alex walks silently beside Gabbie, trying not to notice her frantic breathing. The two of them aren't close, not at all, but that doesn't mean he wants her to suffer such a horrific fate. She doesn't deserve it. No one does.

For half a second, he considers forfeiting the challenge, but he pushes the thought aside. He still wants to live, after all.

"Alex." Gabbie does not look at him. She stares straight ahead, her eyes fixed on an invisible point somewhere in the distance. "I know we've had our differences, but..." Her voice is dull with pain. "I just want you to know that you're still my friend."

He nods. "I know." Then, almost as a reflex, he blurts out the words "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too."

They walk into a room, where they are greeted by a giant machine. Steam lingers in the air. "Whoa," Alex breathes as he takes in his surroundings. This place looks pretty cool, but on the other hand, it _also_ looks like something out of a twisted steampunk film...which is oddly fitting, considering that either he or Gabbie is never going to leave this room again.

 

 _I've survived a challenge once before,_ thinks Gabbie as she enters the steam room. _I can do it again._ But her insecurities plague the back of her mind, and it takes all the strength she has to suffocate them under a mountain of temporary confidence.

Alex finds a little book and reads its contents aloud.

_You must each try to bring the steam machine to life. For every puzzle you solve, a Promethean will take one step closer to the other guest. Solve all four, then pull the lever. The harder you work, the faster you kill your friend._

The last sentence chills Gabbie to the bone. Her gaze travels to Alex's face, and it occurs to her that her survival will mean the end for him. He'll lose his heart, _literally,_ and those sick bastards will probably make her watch it happen. She'll have to live with the guilt for the rest of her life.

_I'm strong. I can handle it._

"Ready?" asks Jetpack Girl.

Gabbie takes her place on the right side of the machine. Alex stands on the left side. Each is shadowed by a Promethean, which gives Gabbie the creeps, because it kinda looks like her Promethean is staring at her boobs. She decides to ignore him. She's got a challenge to win.

Jetpack Girl raises her laser gun and fires it into the air. "Go!"

 

The first thing Alex sees is another collection of blueprints, outlining the inner workings of the steam machine. He scans them, searching for a puzzle, and it takes him a few seconds before he spots a pump on the floor.

_Hm. That's odd._

He steps on it a few times, and a baseball pops out. He catches it and stuffs it into the appropriate slot. A drawer swings open.

Over on her side of the machine, Gabbie also catches a flying ball. "Did anything happen for you?" she asks.

Before Alex can answer, Gabbie's Promethean takes a step towards her, and Alex realizes that he has just completed the first challenge. He has no idea how to feel about that.

 

Gabbie's trying to get her ball into the little hole, but she keeps dropping it, and now Alex is ahead. A huge monster of a man is one step closer to her heart, which she is _not_ happy about. "Oh, God." She retrieves her ball from the ground. "Oh, God. Oh, God." _I gotta live. I've lost too much to die now._

She slips her ball into the hole, causing a drawer to open up for her. Alex's Promethean steps towards him.

"Omigosh." Alex laughs nervously. "Okay."

Inside Gabbie's drawer is a small pipe of some kind. She grabs it and uses her blueprints to try and figure out where it goes on the machine. "I don't know!" _Come on, Gabbie. You got this. Think._ She scowls. _Think!_

"There's no square to fit this into," mutters Alex from his side of the room.

Finally, Gabbie finds the crank slot. She swiftly opens her locker and completes the second puzzle, causing Alex's Promethean to take another step towards him. Gabbie is officially ahead in the puzzle race, and by God, she's proud of herself.

However, she is also frustrated. She's been figuring out her puzzles a little quicker than Alex has, and Alex can see everything she's doing. He can pretty much just copy off her progress.

She's _this close_ to banging her head against the goddamn machine.

 

Alex uses his crank slot to open his locker. Gabbie's Promethean moves closer towards her.

"What is this?" Alex finds a bunch of cords inside the locker. Upon closer inspection, he finds out that he must connect three cables with the machine. He shrugs and gets to work. "How you doing over there?" he shouts in Gabbie's direction.

"I don't know," she replies.

Alex connects the first cable. He reaches into the locker and pulls out a tangled mess of wires, but he can't find the second cable. "What?" He frowns. He's missing something. He has to figure out what's going on, before Gabbie pulls too far ahead for him to catch up.

Speaking of Gabbie, she just connected the first _and_ second cables. Clearly, she's on the right track.

"Oh!" _Now_ he understands. There's a cable behind him. "Didn't even see that!"

From there, plugging in the other two cables proves to be an easy task. In no time at all, Alex has solved the third puzzle, and the bottom chamber opens to reveal a toolbox. Meanwhile, Gabbie's Promethean takes yet another step in her direction.

 

"Did you do something?" Gabbie screams. "Dammit!" She's lost her lead. Just her luck. On top of that, her last cable doesn't seem to be connecting properly. "I don't get it! You just plugged these in?"

"Yeah."

"That's it?" She tries to plug it in, but all she gets is a faceful of stupid sparks.

Alex begins work on his fourth and final puzzle, which is an actual puzzle, because why not. "I used to be pretty good at these when I was younger."

Gabbie's at a dead end. "Hey, Alex." She stands up. "Alex, you wanna try to help me out, fam?"

 

 _Ignore her,_ hisses Alex's brain. _Just focus on yourself. If you help her, she'll snatch the win right out from under you, and your heart will power an Automaton Bride forever. Let her fail._

But a voice from Alex's heart—a voice that sounds like Lauren—has a stronger message. _Help her out._

His heart wins the fight. "You plugged three plugs in? One next to the pump?"

"No," she admits. "I did not."

"There you go."

Gabbie gets her cables working, which causes Alex's Promethean to move towards him once again. This time, though, Alex doesn't care. He's _done_ being intimidated by a robotic creature who wants to use him as an organ donor. Win or lose, he's going to do this _his_ way from now on.

 

Gabbie's behind right now, which sucks, but that won't stop her from working as hard as she possibly can. She still has a chance to put this puzzle together. It's not over yet.

She pulls the pieces out of the box. "Any idea what we're building, Alex?"

"I think you can get that one." He sounds like a teacher coaching a troublesome student.

As Gabbie organizes her pieces, she attempts to clear her mind and focus on her task, only to find that she's too flustered to focus on _anything_ right now. Then again, that's not her fault. There's a goddamn killer robot a few steps away from her! That's enough to stress _anyone_ out!

"I'm missing something huge," she thinks aloud, "and I don't know what it is."

Alex shakes his head. "Oooh. You better hurry up."

Gabbie pouts. "I don't know what I'm building." She laughs, but her laugh is an anxious collection of sounds that hide her terror. DeStorm, Liza, and Tana dart across her mind. They'd want her to live. She _can't_ give up. She _has_ to survive. She _has_ to.

"I think I got enough of a head start," says Alex. "Turn your box over."

Gabbie turns her box over. There's a picture of what she needs to build, right there on the lid. "Son of a bitch." She's thankful to Alex for giving her some hints about this craziness. He's a good guy. She feels _awful_ about what she's going to have to do to him.

"Oh, is this it?" Alex pores over his puzzle. Gabbie has no idea how far along he is. "I don't want you to die!" There's pain in his voice. "But one of us has to!"

 _Thanks for the reminder._ Gabbie's putting her puzzle together as fast as she can. She's halfway done. She can do this. She can—

Alex stands up. His puzzle lies completed at his feet.

Gabbie's heart drops.

 

Alex approaches the lever. His hands are sweating. The last sentence of that awful note plays on repeat in his soul: _the harder you work, the faster you kill your friend._

"Alex, no!"

_"You didn't do anything wrong, but you didn't do anything right."_

"Alex! Give me another minute! Please!"

Alex shakes his head. "I'm sorry." The phrase _better her than me_ races through his mind, and he hates himself for thinking it.

As Gabbie looks on with openmouthed terror, Alex pulls the lever.

He regrets it within seconds. He tries to run to Gabbie, to help her, to _save_ her, but his Promethean grabs his arms and holds him back. "Wait!" He fights his captor's grasp. Gabbie's Promethean marches towards her. "No!" He doesn't want this. "Gabbie! _No!"_

 

"No…no…" It _can't_ end like this. She _has_ to stop him, she _has_ to fight it, _I don't wanna die I don't wanna die please no!_ "Listen!"

The Promethean doesn't listen. Instead, he tackles her to the ground.

_"No!"_

Gabbie screams. She screams for her heart, for her future, for her life, for everything that she's about to lose. She tries and fails to wriggle her way out of the Promethean's iron grip, tears of panic soaking her ashen face.

From somewhere far away, Alex is also screaming. "Gab!" he cries. "Gabbie!"

"Stop it!" _Alex, Alex, help, do something,_ please _do something! Don't let him get me!_ "Listen!" _Please, I want to live, I'll do anything, don't,_ don't!

A knife sinks into her flesh. Her murderer begins to carve out a pathway to her heart.

Oh God it hurts it _hurts_ she wants to _die_ she can't take any _more_ of this why is there a _hand_ in her _chest_ make it stop make it stop _make it stop_ —

It stops. Forever.

 

"No! Stop! _Gabbie!"_

Alex struggles to free himself, screaming Gabbie's name, and he doesn't stop until the Promethean finishes his work. The robotic man pulls himself to his feet, a still-beating heart clenched in his bloodstained fist. Alex feels sick just looking at it.

The Promethean presents the heart to Cedric, whose face is an expressionless mask.

_That's not yours, you asshole._

Alex is forced out of the room by his Promethean, but not before he catches one last glimpse of Gabbie Hanna's bloody body. _My fault._ The girl with the multicolored hair joins the legion of ghosts that haunt his memories.

"Let him go," says Cedric to Alex's Promethean once they're back in the hallway. The Promethean releases his grip on Alex's arms, and Cedric turns to face the grieving young man. "It had to be done."

"Don't talk to me," spits Alex. He marches ahead.

 

"What's going on?" squeaks Tyler as the Prometheans reenter the lab.

"I don't know," says Joey, "but they're coming towards us."

"Wait." Andrea immediately notices the object that one of the Prometheans is carrying. "He has a heart. He has a heart." One of her friends is dead. She doesn't know the specifics, and frankly, she doesn't _want_ to know.

Joey bites his lip. "Where's Alex? Where's Gabbie?"

A shadowy figure arrives. It's Alex, broken, his eyes glazed over with an almost deathlike despair. "What happened?" everyone asks, but he does not reply.

"Oh, gosh," gasps Joey.

Cedric, Alison, and Jetpack Girl walk through the door as well. The Promethean who holds the heart hands it to Cedric.

Andrea's stomach churns. "Is that Gabbie's heart?"

"That's Gabbie's heart," Alex confirms.

Joey and Tyler both look like they're about to vomit. Andrea tries to think of good things in an effort to make herself feel better, but Gabbie's sorrowful face won't leave her alone. _I'm sorry, Gabbie._ She turns away from the disgusting sight in front of her. _I'm sorry you had to die._

 

"Omigosh," gulps Joey, unable to take his eyes off of Gabbie's heart. It's not fair. None of this is fair. Gabbie, just like the rest of his dead friends, should have lived a happy life in the modern world. Instead, this happened. He can't imagine how painful her final moments must've been.

Cedric walks up to the Automaton Bride and takes off her mask, revealing her beautiful face.

"Omigosh," says Joey again. "Beautiful."

"It's a female Frankenstein," says Alex, his voice a bitter monotone.

Cedric places Gabbie's heart inside the compartment on the Bride's chest. He closes the compartment, and the Bride lights up with life. As the YouTubers watch, she stands up, smiles, and embraces a deliriously joyful Cedric.

Joey is beaming. "Oh, this is kinda sweet, though." Come to think of it, Cedric is honestly a bit of a romantic! He actually has a heart!

Well...he has _two_ hearts...

Yeah. Poor choice of words.

Alex, though, is obviously not in the mood for romance. "Now give us the gem!"

"We need the gem," Andrea agrees.

Cedric unpins the gem from his chest and gives it to Joey. It feels warmer than he expected.

 

Tyler misses Gabbie already, but hey, at least they got the gem this time. That's the only good thing to come out of this entire sordid mess. Everything else, though, was horrible, and he hates it, and he wants to go home.

"Come, my Bride," says Cedric as he escorts the adoring Automaton out the door. "Let's go far away from this place."

They leave.

"I ship it so much, kind of!" Joey squees. "It's kind of a little—"

"But that's Gabbie's heart," snaps Tyler.

The room goes silent, and everyone takes a moment to remember the fallen Vaudevillian, along with everyone else who has died so far. _Gabbie. Tana. Liza. DeStorm. Jesse. Lauren._ Tyler recites their names to himself, picturing their faces, promising himself that he'll never forget them for as long as he lives...however long that might be.

Three more gems. That means three more dead people. At this rate, only one will survive to break the spell.

 

The four surviving YouTubers regroup in the lounge, and Alex can't shake the feeling that _he_ killed Gabbie. _We're monsters now,_ he thinks, remembering Joey and Andrea's betrayal. _All of us._

"Well, let's put the gem in," says Tyler, gesturing to the gem holder.

 _Okay. Not_ all _of us._

Joey places the gem into the gem map, underneath the gear symbol. "What's next?" he asks, staring with bewildered eyes at the next symbol. "What the heck _is_ this?"

"It could be a beehive, maybe," suggests Andrea.

Joey squints. "Maybe a planet?"

"Wait." It's Tyler who remembers the midnight deadline. "What time is it?"

"It's five minutes to midnight," says Alison.

"Oh, God."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Gabbie. You were a strong, brave, amazing young woman who did _not_ deserve your disgusting fate.  
>  Next chapter: It's midnight! What _new_ terrors are in store?


	42. Midnight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Six YouTubers have perished, and to make matters worse, the horrors of midnight have _finally_ arrived. Will our four remaining heroes be able to survive the Sorceress's new rules?

"Oh, God," Tyler says again, his face white as a sheet. "Something is about to go down."

Andrea is terrified of what's to come, and it takes all she has to maintain her composure. "We need to be ready for whatever's about to happen," she says in a strained voice.

Joey gulps. "Omigosh. Okay." He turns to Alison. "How much time do we have?"

"We have less than five minutes and three more gems," sighs Alex, whose expression is still twisted with grief from the Gabbie incident. "If each gem equals a life, _one_ of us can live. But we can't do it in that amount of time!"

"No," murmurs Andrea. "No, we do not have enough time for that." Everything is about to change. She is expecting the Sorceress to show up and force the four survivors to straight-up fight each other, like something out of the Hunger Games. After all, Andrea has already murdered one of her friends, so it's really not much of a stretch to assume that she'll have to kill the others if she wants to survive.

Of course, there's also the gender dilemma. She, as the last girl standing, has a significant disadvantage against the three boys. She wouldn't be surprised if they gang up on her.

A clock chimes.

"Everyone," says Alison, "it's midnight now."

The Sorceress's wicked laughter rings in their ears.

"Oh, God." Andrea pulls herself to her feet, her heart breaking. "Okay. I don't wanna sit for this." If it comes to a fight to the death, neither Joey nor Tyler will last longer than five minutes. It's going to come down to her and Alex. She's not sure if she can beat him.

"Just be prepared for anything," advises Joey.

A box next to Tyler opens with an eerie purple light. Everyone runs to it. "Wait." Tyler fishes out a piece of paper. "There's a note."

_It's midnight in the garden of evil, and it's time we escalated the stakes. My lieutenants are no longer waiting to be found. They're coming for you. —The Sorceress._

Well, that's not _quite_ as bad as Andrea was expecting, but it still sucks. The lieutenants are hunting them down. No one is safe. She can't trust anyone. Hell, she doesn't even trust _herself._ "So, do we hide?"

"Okay," whimpers Tyler, putting the note back in the box.

That's when the pounding starts.

 

Everyone screams and scurries away from the door. Everyone, that is, except for Alex, who glances over to see who (or _what)_ is causing all the ruckus.

As it turns out, it's a man, slamming his hands against the glass door with frantic energy. "Help me!" he cries. "Please!"

"Don't listen to him!"

"Don't open the door!"

But Alex runs towards the door. "I think he needs our help." He knows that this man could be a lieutenant, but he doesn't care. The guy's _clearly_ in trouble. They _can't_ just leave him out in the cold.

"Alex!" shouts Joey as Alex lets the man into the lounge. "Omigosh!"

"You _have_ to help me," pleads the stranger. "Please! My son's gonna die if I don't do something!" He wears a brown jacket, a cowboy hat, and a pair of worn-out boots. His face is the picture of desperation.

Alex's heartstrings twitch with sympathy. "Your son?"

The man tells his story between sobs. "We were attacked by a werewolf on the side of the road."

"A _werewolf?"_ exclaims Andrea.

"A werewolf?" echoes Alex. A part of him is surprised, but the rest of him is not surprised in the slightest. _Vampires exist,_ he thinks. _Why not werewolves?_

"Wait, wait, wait," says Alison calmly. "Why?"

It takes a moment for the man to answer, but when he does, his voice is raspy with regret. "I took something from him," he moans. "A gem. The size of my fist. It's unlike anything I've ever seen before."

Alex smiles.

Andrea holds out her hand. "Can we see it?"

The man takes a yellow gem out of his pocket and shows it to the group. "If you help me," he promises, "I'll give it to you."

"We'll help you," says Tyler.

"Yeah," Joey agrees. "We'll help you. We'll help you. What do you need? Where is he?"

 _Maybe this time,_ thinks Alex, but he's too world-weary to finish the thought.

 

As soon as the man reveals his gem, Joey's eyes nearly bulge out of their sockets. _Omigod!_ His misgivings vanish. _Okay, new friend! We'll do whatever you want!_

"The lycanthrope infection hasn't settled into my son's blood yet," says the man. "The only way to purge it is with a mixture of quicksilver and wolfsbane."

Joey has never come across quicksilver or wolfsbane, so he doesn't know what they look like.

The man's voice is quieter now, but still just as distraught as it was before. "I hear tell that there's a map hidden out by the fountain. Please. We don't have much time."

"We will help you," Tyler promises, and Joey can hear the sincerity in his voice.

Alison hands a lantern to each YouTuber.

"We have to hurry!" the man cries. "Please!"

"Let's go, let's go," says Alex.

Joey clenches his hand around the handle of his lantern. "Guys, let's go." He heads into the darkness, trying to ignore the goosebumps that dance up and down his spine.

Andrea is breathing heavily. "Oh, God. I hate this."

"This way, please," begs the man.

Is it Joey's imagination, or can he hear the Sorceress laughing at them?

 

They approach the fountain once more. "We don't have much time," their newest companion snivels, his mouth curled with an almost animalistic fear. "My son is gonna _die_ if I don't find this."

"I don't know if we can trust him," muses Alex, "but he needs our help."

Andrea doesn't like this. The Sorceress said that the lieutenants were coming for them. If this man is here, that makes him a lieutenant, and every lieutenant so far has made an attempt on their lives. What makes him any different? "Wait a minute. How do we know we should trust him?"

"What are we doing?" Joey whispers. "Last time we were over here, the harpies were here." He winces.

"Come in!" wails the man. "Please! I just heard stories...that the map was hidden by the fountain..."

But Andrea isn't fooled by his hysterics. "No! He could be luring us into something!"

"He obviously needs our help," says Alex.

Andrea shakes her head. Alex is a nice person, but he _has_ to learn to stop caring so much about everyone they meet. "I don't like this," she says softly to herself.

"He said we have to get wolfsbane and something," Joey remarks.

The man is currently in the middle of a coughing fit, which bothers Andrea even more. "Why is he coughing?"

No one answers her.

"I hear there is a map to the stagecoach that leads to the wolfsbane," the man gasps between coughs.

Well, like it or not, it looks like they're going to help this man find what he needs. Andrea can only hope that he isn't planning to turn on them.

 

"Look in the trees." Alex, again, becomes the de facto leader of the group. "Look in the flowerpots. A map. We're looking for a map."

 _A map. Right._ Tyler goes into search mode, using his lantern to hunt through his surroundings. He, like Andrea, isn't sure if he trusts this stranger, but he'll help him. After all, a gem is at stake.

"Girl, I can't see through the fog," complains Andrea.

By chance, Tyler's light flickers across a chest. "Oh!" He grabs it. "Wait! You guys!"

"Did you find it?" Andrea asks.

Tyler isn't sure. But he's found _something,_ and if it's in a chest, it's probably important.

Joey waves a hand. "Bring it over here! Bring it over here!"

Tyler sets the chest down in front of everyone. Upon closer examination, it turns out that the chest is locked, just like everything else in this stupid place.

"We need a key," realizes Andrea.

"Three locks." Alex counts them. "One, two, three. Look for the keys."

Joey wrinkles his nose. "You're _positive_ they're keys? They're not a combination or anything?"

"It's definitely keys," Andrea confirms.

They're searching everywhere. They're digging in everything, they're overturning every stone, and they're even looking in the fountain itself. But, try as they might, they cannot find the keys.

 

"I almost just accidentally dove in," Andrea chuckles as she sifts through the fountain. "That's how committed I am. Remember that when we vote." _Please don't kill me._

"Okay, there's a spiderweb over here," says Joey. "Let's stay away from spiders."

Andrea remembers Jesse, and her heart hurts. "Yeah. I ran into that earlier. Maybe the map is hanging from the tree somewhere?"

"Maybe," mutters Joey.

They keep looking. Alex lifts Andrea up to look in a pot that's too high up for her to reach by herself. She investigates the pot, then sighs. "I got nothing." _Where on earth are those keys?_

 

As he puts Andrea back down, Alex can feel the last few drops of hope trickle out of his heart. Six YouTubers—including his allies, his friends, and the girl he loves—are dead. Four are still alive, but three gems have yet to be found. Does he _really_ want to be the sole survivor of these murder games?

"I feel like maybe we have to dig for them?" Joey suggests.

A wolf howls in the distance.

Andrea bristles. "What's that?"

"My son doesn't have long," the man murmurs.

"Dude," says Tyler, "you don't look good."

Joey's rummaging through one of the plants. "I don't know why," he groans. "Maybe they, like, buried the keys or something?"

It's time for Alex to be honest. "I don't think we're gonna make it out alive, guys." They've fought so hard, and Alex _wants_ to keep fighting...but he's not sure if it's worth it, especially if only one of them has a chance at going home. Maybe they should just let the house consume them. At least they wouldn't have to live with the deaths of everyone they care about.

"We just have to look a little harder," Tyler insists.

Alex sets aside the thought of giving up. He promised himself that he'd live for Lauren's sake, and he also promised that he'd at _least_ save Tyler. As long as they still have something to fight for, they _can't_ give up. Not yet, anyway.

 

Joey is angry. He's grabbing pots, smashing them, knocking them over, and committing all kinds of property damage. "Where the hell are these keys?!?" he screams. "This is so frustrating!"

"Ew," groans Andrea as she digs through the dirt. She looks exhausted. "I feel like we're looking too hard for something that's right in front of us."

While she's still speaking, Joey gazes into the fountain, and he comes close to punching himself in the face. "Guys, we're so stupid. I literally see a key right here."

"Where?" Tyler asks.

Joey fishes the key out of the water. "Right _here!"_ Once he has the key, he uses it to open one of the locks on the chest. "Okay. We got one lock off." _One down. Two to go._

 

"Omigod." Andrea tries to shield her eyes from the fog. "This fog is _really_ screwing me up right now."

Tyler, too, is having a bit of trouble with the fog, but he brushes it away and keeps up the search. His efforts are rewarded when he finds the second key in a potted plant. "Wait! You guys!"

"You found one?" Alex asks.

Tyler triumphantly pulls the key out of the plant. "It is tiny!" he announces to his friends.

"We need one more small key," says Alex.

Tyler gets to work on the second lock. This mansion is _riddled_ with locks, and the keys are almost too small to be used for anything productive. It takes him a few minutes to open the lock.

_One key left._

"Where could it be?" Alex frets. "There's not that many places it could be!"

"Maybe it's somewhere in the grass?" Tyler suggests.

But Alex's confidence seems to be shrinking. "We're _never_ gonna find—"

"Wait! Wait! You guys! You guys!"

Andrea Russett—thank God for her—has found the final key. She runs to the chest.

Tyler feels relieved, but still a bit nervous. "We're running out of time."

"Damn," says Joey.

Andrea unlocks the final lock, opens the chest, and recovers the map. As she reads it, the boys crowd around her.

"Okay, where are we at?" Alex points at a dot on the map. "We're here."

_Follow this map to the location of the stagecoach, where you will find the wolfsbane._

All of a sudden, they hear a savage roar. Tyler turns around to find a werewolf—an actual, honest-to-goodness _werewolf_ —headed straight for them. He screams. So does everyone else.

"Go!" shouts Alison.

They don't need the command.

Tyler's running as fast as his legs can carry him. He can barely hear his friends shrieking a string of frightened exclamations. The beast's claws are burned into his mind, which is currently running wild with _dear God_ and _don't let it get me._ He's going so fast that his glasses almost fall off.

Once they're safe again, he stops for a second to pull himself out of fight-or-flight mode. Tonight has been _insane._ They've already faced spiders, vampires, a mad scientist, an ice witch...and now _werewolves?_

They are _never_ getting out of here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The gang comes across what appears to be a ticket to salvation, but they should know by now not to trust _anything_ in this place. Also, Joey volunteers to be a horse.


	43. The Stagecoach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The search for quicksilver and wolfsbane uncovers a stagecoach. Could this be the group's way back to 2017?

The group keeps moving. None of them have _completely_ recovered from the werewolf's appearance, least of all Joey. "That was a werewolf." _I swear to God, if that thing kills one of us..._

"Because it's midnight, you guys," Andrea explains.

"You guys!" shouts Tyler. "A carriage!"

Joey blinks. Sure enough, there is a red stagecoach in front of them. They were told by the note that there'd be a stagecoach here, but it isn't until now that Joey realizes what it could mean for their survival. "Omigosh!" This is their way out. "We're free!"

"Yes!" cheers a suddenly hopeful Alex. "Forget about the gems! Let's go!"

Andrea frowns. "Wait. There's no horses, you guys."

"Freedom," Joey sings, not giving a damn about horses. This is his chance to save himself, Tyler, Alex, and Andrea, and by God, he's taking it. "You know what? Someone just drag that carriage. We can just go in, and I'll pull it. Let's go. Get on in."

Andrea gets in immediately. Alex, however, hangs back. "Is there any wolfsbane or anything?" he wants to know, as if wolfsbane even _matters_ right now.

"How are we about to go _anywhere?"_ chortles Tyler. "There's no horse!"

 _Like I said, I'll be the horse._ Anything _to save us._

 

Inside the carriage, Andrea finds a chest. While her better judgement screams _don't worry about it, go, get out of here,_ she decides to hand the chest to Alex.

"Oh, thank God," says Tyler as Alex places their latest discovery on the ground. "Don't tell me that it's locked."

"Another key," Alex confirms, frustration in his voice.

Joey's face turns purple. "Are you freakin' kidding me?"

_Only the horses can see the key._

__

__

"What horses?" questions Alex.

"Are they invisible?" Joey shines his lantern around the carriage. "Hello? Horsey?"

 _Yeah,_ sighs Andrea to herself, _this carriage is_ not _our way home._

 

Gears begin to turn in Alex's brain, and soon, it all makes sense. "Oh. In their _position._ What position would they be in? They'd be pulling...they would see..."

"So we would be right here, as horses," says Tyler, moving in front of the carriage to be next to Andrea.

Nothing happens. "Let me get in the stagecoach position," Alex murmurs, "and see if I can see anything."

As he climbs into the driver's seat, the others continue to look for the ideal horse position. He can hear their bewildered voices below him.

"Are they up here, or are they in front?"

"Or are the horses facing _this_ way?"

"They're _this_ way!"

"If I was a horse..."

"Maybe just try walking forward?"

Alex sits down. He pretends that there are reins in his hands, and he drives invisible horses forward into the night. _Giddy-up!_ Alas, no key appears. _So much for the dream of being a stagecoach driver._

"Hurry up," begs the man. "My son doesn't have long."

A previously-forgotten fact about stagecoach horses illuminates Alex's mind. "Horses have blinders. They can only see forward."

"Is _that_ anything?" Andrea asks. "I don't know if that's something."

Alex checks the blinders. He's right, he's _right,_ there's a key there. "Found it!" He grabs it. "There's a key. They can only see it cause they're the only ones that wear these." He can't remember the last time he's felt _this_ proud of himself.

 

The key to the chest was in the _blinders_ this whole time! Great! Tyler's so happy! He just wishes that the carriage had been more than just another clue.

Oh, well.

Alex opens the chest. "What do we got?" Tyler wants to know.

"Wolfsbane," is Alex's reply. He pulls out a jar of the turquoise substance, along with a note.

 _Well,_ thinks Tyler, _now we've only got quicksilver left to find._

Alex reads.

_We stashed a safe in the trees along this road to hold the quicksilver we took from the Southern Bank._

"Okay," says Joey. "So I say we just go forward."

Tyler agrees with Joey. Going forward is all they can do.

 

Andrea nods, then frowns. "Is this where the map ends?"

Joey spots a wooden safe hidden in the bushes. "Oh! Right here!" He darts towards it, grabs it, and pulls it out into the open.

"Another key?" grumbles Alex.

"Hold on." Joey is _tired_ of fetching keys to open things, but he has no choice. He reads the note that's written on the lid.

_I've never seen anything like quicksilver before. To keep my men from stealing it, I split the combination into three parts. I hid one here, another in the greenhouse under the moon, and the last one is on the stone path, where you need to keep an eye out for traps._

"Okay, Andrea," says Alex, "let's go to the greenhouse. Come on."

If Andrea and Alex are going off together, that means Tyler will have to come with Joey. Joey's fine with this. Tyler's a good person. Joey doesn't mind spending some time with him.

"Wait a minute!" the man cries. "There's a werewolf about. You need to stay hidden if the werewolf comes around, cause if he grabs you, he'll drag you to the back patio for later eating."

"We'll stick together," Tyler assures him.

"Yeah," says Alex.

"Yeah." Joey doesn't want to play hide-and-seek with werewolves, but he can't say that he's a stranger to this game. "Let's go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Finding the quicksilver requires splitting up and, most importantly, not getting eaten by werewolves. Also, Tyler and Joey trust each other, and Alex almost punches a werewolf in the face.


	44. Cross My Heart and Hope to Die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are werewolves on the loose. Let's split up, gang!

Joey and Tyler head up the stone path, their lanterns serving as their only source of light, as a hungry werewolf howls in the distance. Joey keeps an eye out for traps. _We're in the woods,_ he frets to himself. _That's, like, the territory of a werewolf._

Tyler turns to Joey, a wide-eyed look of anxiety on his face. "More people have to die for us to get those gems," he says in a shaky voice. "I don't want it to be us." He sticks out his pinky. "Promise?"

Joey wants to cry. He _knows_ that he won't be able to save everyone, but he can't bring himself to say no to Tyler's innocent baby blues. "Promise."

They lock pinkies. Tyler kisses their pinky-promise, and a new alliance is born.

 

Alex is with Andrea, and while he's still not sure about where her loyalties lie, he _does_ know that she wants to get out of this place just as badly as the rest of them. Maybe if he spends some time with her, he won't be suspicious of her anymore.

 _And maybe you're setting your heart up to be broken again,_ complains his conscience. _Tyler's already too close to you, and now you want to care about Andrea? Remember, only one person can survive._

They enter the greenhouse. "Do you think it's under one of these pots?" Andrea asks, gesturing to the plethora of pots on the floor.

"Oh, yes," Alex replies. "It _has_ to be. Omigod."

Together, they look through the pots. "There are _so_ many," comments Andrea.

Alex agrees, but he doesn't mind. _Anything's_ better than another death challenge.

 

Tyler is _so_ happy to have Joey as an ally. He knows that Andrea and Alex wouldn't do anything to hurt him, and Joey was the only one he was still unsure about. Well, now he's sure. As long as everyone's on his side, he's going to be okay.

He hasn't felt this confident in ages.

"Hold on," says Joey. "Is this a trap?" He gasps. "There's a trap! There's a trap! It's right there!" He grabs the rope and starts to pull. "It's a—" Whatever he was about to say is interrupted by a guttural noise of disgust from his chest.

It's a rabbit. A _skinned_ rabbit, no less.

"Don't you think that's gonna attract a werewolf?" Tyler hisses as Joey pulls the rabbit down to their level.

"I don't like the bunny," Joey whimpers. "Maybe we're supposed to count how many traps there are. So there's one..."

Tyler, however, thinks that the rabbit means something.

Joey pales. "Don't touch it!"

Too late. Against his better judgement, Tyler picks up the rabbit and reaches into its bloody carcass. "Omigod." It is _vile._ Rabbit blood soaks his fingers. He's close to throwing up again, but he suppresses the urge.

Thankfully, he finds a note inside.

_Butch always liked to—_

He's cut off by a werewolf's roar.

"Someone's coming," breathes Joey. "Hide. Hide. Tyler. Omigod. Tyler."

The boys duck behind a tree. Joey repeats Tyler's name in increasingly frenzied tones, while Tyler stays as still as humanly possible. _Quiet. Stay quiet. If it can't find us, it can't catch us, and if it can't catch us, it can't..._

His new ally, though, will _not_ shut up. "I'm scared. I'm scared."

_Me too._

 

Andrea wonders offhand how Joey and Tyler are doing. The forest is prime hunting territory, so they're probably in more danger out there than she and Alex are in here. Hell, she wouldn't be surprised if the werewolf has already found them. She'd be heartbroken, but not surprised.

All of a sudden, she hears a growl.

"Oh!" Alex scurries under the table. "Get down! Get down!"

 _Shit._ Andrea joins Alex under the table, her heart in her throat, as a werewolf enters the room. It jumps onto the table, snarls, bares its fangs, and then proceeds to start banging its massive paws against the wood.

Andrea is so close to Alex that she can almost hear his nervous heart. She's trying not to even _breathe_ loudly, let alone move, since her outfit is loud as hell in itself. One jingle, and she's toast.

Finally, the werewolf leaves, freeing Andrea and Alex to continue their search.

 

"Come back this way," says Joey to Tyler, leading the smaller YouTuber away from the werewolf. "Hide." He _has_ to keep them both safe. He doesn't think he'll be able to forgive himself if Tyler falls victim to the bloodthirsty beasts.

Then again, there are a _lot_ of things he can't forgive himself for.

The werewolf's growls fade away. "Okay," murmurs Joey. "I think we're clear. He went the other way." _That was_ way _too close for comfort._ He returns his attention to the note that Tyler found. "What does it say?"

_Butch always liked to keep a certain number of bullets on him. He thought it made him lucky._

_Bullets,_ thinks Joey. _We need bullets._

They continue down the path, and they find another trap. After checking to make sure that no werewolves are around, they lower it, and they find a sack full of stuff.

Joey isn't too sure if inspecting the sack is a good idea. "This seems sketchy," he remarks. "This looks like it's someone's."

"Who?" asks Tyler. "That guy?"

"There's bread," Joey reports as he rummages through the sack. "What the heck...this is someone's _food!_ This is their stash!" He doesn't want to investigate somebody's dinner. "I don't know." His mind wanders back to the man they are trying to help. "There's definitely something sketchy about him. I think this is his. Who else would it be?" What is _up_ with him? Is he truly on their side?

 

"I don't know if I trust this guy," mutters Alex to Andrea. "How do we know if his son is really taken?" Come to think of it, what if the quicksilver thing is all a setup, and the man is really an agent of the Sorceress? What if he's here to turn them all into werewolves, or something like that?

If that's the plan—if the Sorceress wants them as her monsters—Alex chooses death.

"Wait." Andrea points to a switched-off spotlight above their heads. "That's the moon."

There's a rope attached to the spotlight. "I'm gonna pull it," says Alex. "I think it's gonna release something, but you look out for the werewolves."

He gives the rope a good yank, and it falls off the spotlight, leaving him with a handful of rope and nothing else. "Oh, that's not supposed to happen," he sighs.

Andrea frowns. "No?"

"I gotta get up there." Alex climbs up onto the table and begins to inspect the spotlight.

"I'm scared," admits Andrea, and in that moment, she seems less Mystical and more like a real person. "Alex, how are you going to get down if a werewolf comes?"

Alex hasn't really considered that, but he shrugs it off. "Hold on." He's almost got it. "Here we go."

"Hurry," says Andrea. "Hurry, hurry, hurry."

As soon as Alex opens the spotlight, a multitude of balls spill out onto the table and the floor.

"I see one!" Andrea shouts.

Along with the balls, they find a piece of wood with the number twenty-seven on it. Alex absorbs this new information and smiles. They're one step closer.

His smile disappears. _One step closer to what? Another chance to watch somebody die?_

 

Much to Tyler's relief, the next thing that Joey pulls out of the sack is a belt filled with bullets. "What is _this?"_ The Savant blinks in surprise. "It's a belt."

"Those are silver bullets!" Tyler explains. _The number of bullets_ must _be Butch's lucky number, and that number is probably gonna have something to do with the combination._

Joey counts them. "One, two, three, four, five, six..." His voice becomes inaudible for a moment, then returns. "...eight, nine, ten, eleven...no..." He starts again. "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten." He pauses. "Eleven."

"How many?" Tyler snaps. "Ten or eleven?"

"Eleven, okay? I miscounted. I'm worried."

 _Eleven. That's it._ "That must be the number we're looking for."

"Well, let's just bring it back, just in case."

"Perfect."

 

The group reconvenes near the box, where Alison and the man wait for them. "Are these your bullets?" Joey demands to know, shoving the belt full of bullets at their so-called friend.

"Are you Butch?" is Tyler's question.

This is when Joey realizes that the man has never introduced himself. "What's your name?"

"Atticus."

"Atticus?" Joey was _not_ expecting _that_ name.

Alex and Andrea seem _very_ interested in the bullets. "Are they _silver_ bullets?" Alex asks.

"Maybe we're wrong," frets Tyler.

"Okay." Andrea kneels in front of the box. "We have a plaque that says twenty-seven."

"We have eleven," says Joey, "and we have that." He points to the box, and he quickly counts the scratches on its lid. "Which is thirteen. Maybe we subtract them all from twenty-seven."

"Well, we need three numbers on each combination," Alex replies.

"Do you think it's twenty-seven, thirteen, eleven?" questions Andrea.

Tyler nods.

"Okay." Andrea's already messing around with one of the two locks, while Joey takes the other. "So I'm gonna do two," she says. "You do seven."

Alex's voice is hesitant. "Yeah, but how do we know it's that order?"

"We can do the next one," Tyler points out.

"Okay, you're right," says Andrea. Then, to Joey, "So I'm gonna do one. You do three. And what was the last one? Eleven? So we each do one."

"Or we could start from lowest to highest." As Joey offers up his idea, he catches a glimpse of Tyler, who is clearly judging the lot of them. _I know, Ty. I'm an idiot. But..._

The combination does not work. "Well, it's not that one," groans Andrea.

 _On to the next one._ "Okay, so, for twenty-seven, you're gonna do two. I'll do seven."

"But that one didn't work for mine," she says.

Joey bites his lip. "There's just so many different combinations." _As long as we keep trying, we're_ sure _to find one that works eventually._

 

They try all sorts of different ways of splitting the numbers up. They add them. They subtract them. Nothing is working. Andrea's on the verge of ripping her hair out in frustration.

"Maybe they're in the wrong order," suggests Tyler. "Try it the other way around."

"Okay," says Joey.

Alex squints at the box. "You think we read it here? The two here? Or it has to be those three?"

"Should we switch it?" What is Andrea saying? Of _course_ they should. "Let's try switching it."

Tyler's eyes light up with what _has_ to be a brainstorm. "What if it's all three numbers in a row, and then split down the middle?" He uses hand gestures to emphasize his point. "So one, three, two. And now _you_ start with seven..."

Andrea's already way ahead of him. "Got it. You're right."

"Wow, Tyler!" Joey beams at the blonde, pride shining on his face.

"Thank God," says Tyler. "It said 'split down the middle.'"

It works. "Yes," Andrea sighs in relief.

"You guys, we have to hurry," Alex reminds them.

They open the chest, and there is the quicksilver, ready for their use. Now, at last, they have both of the things they need to cure Atticus's son. Best of all, no one has died yet. Things are looking up.

"We need to get to my son, please." Hope mingles with urgency in Atticus's voice. "Follow me to my son."

So they follow Atticus. "Look out for the werewolf," says Alex as they run.

"Once you fix my son, I'll give the gem to you," Atticus promises.

Andrea plans on holding him to that promise.

 

They find Atticus's son, a boy in his early teens with a huge gash in his arm. "Omigod." Tyler's heart swells with sympathy. _The poor thing! Thank God we got to him before anything awful happened._

"We got the ingredients, son," Atticus assures his child. "You're gonna get better."

"Now I feel bad that we didn't believe him," Joey sighs.

"It said I'd change," says the boy in a weak voice. "That I'd be healed."

Atticus shakes his head. "No. You're too young. The transformation will tear you apart. It _has_ to be this way!"

"Okay." Joey has the wolfsbane in hand, but he looks confused regardless. "What do we do?"

"Give him the wolfsbane," says Alex.

Joey tries to hand Atticus the wolfsbane, but Atticus shrinks back from it as if it's a poisonous snake. This worries Tyler. "Why can't _you_ touch it?" Something's _very_ wrong here.

"What?" says Andrea.

Joey's sympathetic gaze vanishes. "He's acting _real_ sketchy."

"You mix the ingredients in here and smear it on his wound," Atticus instructs them, giving them a small bowl. "I'm gonna go get some water." He walks away.

"Why won't he touch that?" Joey complains. "He's not even touching it."

But Atticus is already gone.

"That makes me not wanna touch this," says Andrea.

Tyler agrees, but they've come too far to back out now.

"Okay, guys." Joey shrugs, resigned to their task. "Mix it up. Mix it up."

Andrea scowls. "I can't open this."

"Do it," whispers Tyler, "but this guy is _sketch!"_

"Why are _we_ touching them if _he_ won't?" Andrea wants to know.

She's still speaking when the sound of a werewolf's howl hits their ears once more. "Omigod." Tyler's trying not to be scared, but he can't shake the feeling that those werewolves are going to kill someone in this group. He's suffered through six deaths already. He's not sure if he can take a seventh loss.

 

Alex decides that it's not worth it to suspect Atticus's intentions right now. The fact is, there's a dying boy who needs their help, so he's going to help him first and worry about Atticus later.

"What do we need to do?" Tyler asks.

"Oh, gosh." Joey squirms in his shoes. "He's in bad condition."

"I got it," says Alex. "Hold this." As Joey holds the bowl for him, Alex mixes the quicksilver and the wolfsbane together. _This is for the gem,_ he thinks as he works. _If we do this right, maybe we'll get a gem without a death._

Then, he remembers what happened to Liza, and he wonders if such a dream is even _possible_ anymore.

Once the mixture is complete, he smears it on the boy's wound, just as Atticus told them to do. The boy cries out, and Alex shushes him. "The werewolves are gonna find us!" he whisper-shouts. "Someone cover his mouth." The last bits of quicksilver-wolfsbane goo cover the injury. "There."

"We did it," says Joey with a smile.

The boy breathes heavily. "You folks should probably run." The fear in his eyes has not yet gone away.

"Why?" several people ask at once.

"I don't think my father shared his new condition with you."

"What do you mean?" Alex asks nervously.

It's Tyler who understands. _"He got bit too!"_

 _Oh, no._ No wonder he didn't want to touch the ingredients. He's a werewolf. He's a _freakin'_ werewolf, and now they're _all_ in trouble. Including his own son.

"What about you?" Alex asks the boy, who does not answer him.

"Let's go!" cries Andrea. "Let's go! Let's go!"

So, as everyone reacts to this latest reveal, they run. Or, at least, they _try_ to run. But they only make it five steps before Atticus appears, in werewolf form, ready to eat them all.

"Atticus," says Alison in an iron voice, "we saved your son. You owe us a debt, and we're calling it in."

A second werewolf appears behind them. Alex is freaking out. Joey is freaking out. Andrea is freaking out. Tyler is freaking out. _Everyone_ is freaking out. And they're cornered.

 _How many are there?_ thinks Alex. _And how many can I take?_

 

In her mind, Andrea had a beautiful image of Taylor Lautner in _Twilight,_ being a beautiful, perfect, manly, protective werewolf. This is pretty much the polar opposite of that.

"What do we do, guys?" Joey stammers. "What do we do? Guys, this is bad. This is bad. This is bad."

Since Alison's debt gambit didn't work, the vampire tries a different tactic. "A life for a gem. We'll vote."

"There will be no vote," snarls Atticus.

_No vote?_

Joey looks taken aback. "What?" His eyes instinctively flicker towards Tyler.

"All of you will run the gauntlet that lies between here and the fountain," Atticus growls in a voice that does not sound anything like him. "The last straggler _will_ be devoured."

"You _betrayed_ us!" yells Joey.

"We'll be taking this _now,"_ snaps Alison, snatching the gem from Atticus, "as promised then." Andrea has never seen their protector look as angry as she does now, and she doesn't blame her. They saved Atticus's son. They shouldn't have to do this.

But they do. And now, _again,_ one of them is going to die.

"At my howl," says the werewolf that once was on their side, "the gauntlet begins."

Andrea takes a moment to size up her chances. She's up against three guys in jeans and boots, and she's wearing a Mystic's jangly wardrobe. She doesn't stand a chance. She might as well just give up right now.

But she won't. Because she's survived this long. And she's not going down without a fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Joey, Alex, Tyler, and Andrea must run a race of death. Someone's blood is about to stain this house's lawn...but whose?


	45. Her Last Stand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is no vote. There is only the gauntlet. Who will become the werewolves' latest chew toy?

Atticus howls. The gauntlet begins.

"Let's go!" shouts Joey, and before Tyler has a chance to process what's happening, they're off. They run to the first obstacle, a net of barbed wire, and all four of them start crawling underneath it.

Tyler soon discovers that his nice red coat, as fashionable as it may be, is _not_ a great thing to be wearing during something like this. He keeps getting snagged on everything, and on top of that, his crawling skills are not quite up to par. It's a struggle to even keep his glasses on his face, let alone keep moving forward.

Alex is the first to finish his army crawl, then Andrea, then Joey, and finally Tyler. The Thespian realizes that he's at the back of the pack, remembers what's going to happen to him if he finishes in last place, and speeds towards the second obstacle.

There is a wall that they must climb. By the time Tyler gets there, Alex has already scaled it, while Andrea and Joey fight their way towards the top. Tyler tries to keep up, but his jacket gets caught on the briars, and he's falling further and further behind.

 _Oh, God. Oh, God._ He can hear the werewolves snarling behind him, no doubt sizing up their potential meal. _No!_ He grits his teeth and keeps moving. _This is_ not _how I die!_

 

 _If I'm not last,_ thinks Andrea, _I'm first._ She's lost her early lead to Alex, but that's okay. She's still ahead of Joey and Tyler. As long as she's ahead of _someone,_ she will survive this race.

She pulls herself up over the wall and runs after Alex, brushing bits of shrubbery off of her skirt as she goes.

It's time to show them what she's willing to endure.

 

Alex, who's _way_ ahead of everyone else, reaches the next checkpoint, where it turns out that he has to carry a heavy bag up a flight of stairs. He lifts it over his shoulder without even thinking about it.

 _I'm_ not _gonna die today,_ insists a strong, commanding voice at the forefront of his mind. He's running on confidence and half-fulfilled promises. _Today is_ not _my day._

He reaches the top of the steps. He is greeted by four glass bottles, each one set up like a target. There are stones on the ground. Alex realizes that he must smash a bottle if he wants to keep going.

"Oh, this is heavy!" he hears Joey shout.

_They're close._

It takes Alex three tries, but one of his stones _finally_ breaks a bottle into a thousand jagged pieces. He stops for a bit to catch his breath, then leaves the scene just as his three friends arrive.

_I'm getting out of here. With or without them._

Sometimes, Alex Wassabi scares himself.

 

Joey, Andrea, and Tyler reach the bottle game as a group. Joey's arms hurt from carrying that heavy bag, but other than that, he is in complete beast mode. He is not going to let _anything_ stop him from crossing that finish line.

He picks a bottle and starts throwing stones at it. _Don't panic,_ he thinks. _Stay calm. Stay calm._

Then, in a plot twist that Joey wasn't expecting, Tyler throws his first rock at _Joey's_ bottle, and he breaks it.

"Hey, that's mine!" yells Joey.

Tyler runs away.

Joey scowls. _So much for our alliance,_ his mind grumbles, temporarily overcome with anger. _I swear to God, Tyler, if I die because you broke my bottle, I'm going to haunt you for the rest of your life._

He and Andrea continue to throw rocks at the bottles, and his frustration gives way to fear. For the first time in a while, he could _die._

He _hates_ this feeling.

 

Alex rounds a corner, and he catches sight of the finish line. _Thank God._ He runs through the red tape. He is safe.

_Who's gonna make it back alive?_

_Who will I have to say goodbye to?_

He doesn't know. Nor does he know if his heart can handle another fallen friend.

 

As Andrea throws, she thinks of Tana. She hasn't thought of Tana since she killed her two hours ago; she's buried the Path of Betrayal under an avalanche of current survival priorities. But now, she thinks of Tana, and Tana's final declaration of love rings in her ears, and guilt emerges from her subconscious like a zombie rising from the dead.

 _I murdered her. Sure, Joey was there, but it was_ my _decision. Because of me, she'll never go home again._

Then, Joey breaks his bottle. "Yes!" he shouts as he sprints away.

Andrea's in last.

_Is this Tana's revenge?_

Her shaking hands throw what feels like their millionth stone, and the final bottle falls apart. A sudden surge of determination powers her towards the finish line.

 

Tyler can't believe his luck. If he hadn't smashed that bottle on the first try, he'd probably be werewolf kibble by now. He'll have to write his reflexes a thank-you note or something.

There's the finish line. There's Alex, waiting for him. There's his one-way ticket to staying alive.

As Tyler finishes the gauntlet, Alex gives him a high-five. "Yes!" he cheers. "I knew you could do it!"

"Thanks," gasps Tyler. He and Alex are safe, but Joey and Andrea are still in the danger zone. One will die, and worst of all, Tyler genuinely has no idea who he'd rather keep alive. He loves them both. He doesn't want them to go.

 

Joey keeps running. He hears the werewolves' growls, but he ignores them as best he can and focuses on what's ahead. _Gotta go faster,_ murmurs his mind. _Gotta finish this race. Gotta stay alive._

He turns a corner, sees the finish line, and officially takes third place.

 _I made it._ He's too tired to register the high five that Alex gives him. The only emotion he feels right now is a blanket of pure relief.

 

Andrea pushes herself past the corner, only to discover that it's too late. The boys have won. _I'm dead,_ is her immediate reaction. _I'm these werewolves' meal._

Her last words are thick with regret. "I'm sorry, you guys."

"No," says Joey. "You're fine."

"Get behind us," orders Alex.

Andrea does as she's told, but she knows in her heart that there's no protecting her now. She's doomed. She killed Tana Mongeau in cold blood, and this is karmic payback for her sins.

 _Goodbye, everyone._ She takes a deep breath and prepares herself for the painful death that awaits her. _Please, whatever you do, don't let the Sorceress win._

_Tana...I'm so sorry..._

Alison's furious voice undercuts her final thoughts. "We had a deal!"

"No deal," says Atticus.

All of a sudden, Alison uses her body to shield her charges, hissing at the werewolves who threaten them. Andrea emerges from her despair-induced stupor and watches, awestruck, as their vampire assistant challenges the game.

 _What is she doing?_ the defeated Mystic wonders. _Someone has to die. Surely she knows that._

Alison turns to Joey. "Joey," she says softly, "take the gem."

It is then that Andrea realizes what Alison's about to do. She opens her mouth to scream _no, please, don't, just let me die,_ but her vocal chords are too terrified to work properly.

"What?" Alex looks shocked. "Wait! No!"

Joey takes the gem, but he shakes his head as he does so. "Alison..."

"Run," is her simple reply.

Andrea manages to choke out the word "what" as Alison prepares to fight. _No._ God, _no. She shouldn't do this. I don't want her to die because of me. I don't want another goddamn death on my conscience._

"We can take them!" Alex shouts.

At this, Alison's tone changes from soft stoicism to an anguished plea. "Go!"

"Alison—"

 _"Go!"_ cries their faithful protector. "Run! And don't look back!"

"Come on," says Joey, and they run. Andrea, as per Alison's last request, does not look back, but she hears every moment of her friend's final battle. She hears scuffles, punches, growls, screams, the sound of flesh being ripped apart...and eventually, a pair of victorious howls.

Alison, who's been there since the beginning, who's saved them all a thousand times, is gone.

Andrea Russett, however, is still alive.

The world isn't fair.

 

The four YouTubers, now without their guide, run down the stairs and into the hallway. "Are they coming?" Joey asks.

"No," responds Alex. "I don't see anyone."

"That was insane." Joey stares at the gem in his hands, struggling to understand what he just saw. _Alison's dead._ He remembers accusing her of working with the Sorceress, and he's mad at himself for _ever_ suspecting such a courageous soul. "We have a gem, at least."

"What just happened?" Andrea gasps.

Tyler stares at her, gratitude on his face. "Thank God you're still alive."

"But did we cheat the system?" she frets. "Does that mean we went around the rules?"

Before anyone can answer her, a door opens in front of them, and a creature more hideous than anything they've ever seen emerges. All thoughts of Alison leave Joey's mind, and he begins to scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Alison. You're the hero that this story needs.  
> Next chapter: Help! There's a hellish monster who wants to devour our heroes' souls! Its name, aptly enough, is the Devourer. What to do?


	46. The Devourer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group is without a protector, which sucks, especially considering that there's a monster after them! Our final four heroes must fight to save themselves from his clutches.

"What _is_ that?!?"

"I don't know!"

"What the hell?"

"Go! Run! _Run!"_

Joey, Andrea, Alex, and Tyler run back the way they came, away from the disgusting monster that just showed up out of nowhere. _Is that an alien?_ shrieks Tyler's scrambled mind as he follows the others up the stairs. _He doesn't_ look _human. Oh no, oh God, I'll bet he came from another planet, and he's working with the Sorceress, and he wants to kill us all!_

Thankfully, the YouTubers are somehow able to leave the beast behind.

"I have never seen _anything_ like that before," says Andrea.

Alex glances over his shoulder. "I don't think we're being followed."

"What do we do?" Joey asks.

"I don't know!" snaps Tyler. "We don't have Alison anymore!" Their trusty guide was just ripped apart by werewolves, and while her sacrifice _did_ save Andrea's life, it also left the group without a protector. How are they supposed to fight the lieutenants without her?

"Uh..." Alex points. "What is _this?"_

"This" is a small, strange statue, which appears to be of a grey, squid-like monster in a crouching position. Tyler doesn't remember whether or not it was there before.

"I don't know," sighs Joey.

Andrea approaches the statue and reads its inscription.

_Speak to us, forgotten one, and steal the light from our eyes that we might see._

Tyler, as usual, has no idea what any of that means.

 

"Steal the light?" Andrea's voice sounds like it's a thousand miles away, and Joey can't help but worry about her current mental state. Especially after Alison's final stand.

Alex begins to examine the statue. "Wait."

"What?" says Joey.

A banging sound is heard. The group turns around, and the creature is back, trapped inside the mansion itself. 

"Omigosh," Joey gasps. "He's inside. We should maybe just stay out here."

"We have to get the light," Alex insists.

Joey decides that his best course of action is to size up their latest threat. "Wait...I just wanna take a little closer look at him...maybe just see..." He tiptoes towards the closed glass door and peeks at the monster. "Omigod!"

The horned beast lunges at the glass. Joey screams and jumps away. _Forget it. I'm not going anywhere_ near _that thing._

 

"What if we talk to it?" suggests Tyler. "Speak to _us?"_

Andrea paces around the area. "Us means there's more than one, which really freaks me out." It's at _least_ an hour after midnight. All hell is breaking loose. This monster must be a lieutenant, and he is looking for _them._ Furthermore, he's _clearly_ not friendly, which means that he represents another chance at death...a chance that Andrea doesn't intend to take.

Like it or not, Alison just died for her. She _has_ to make sure that her friend's sacrifice means something.

Tyler squints at a small drawing on the base of the statue. "What is this?"

Andrea looks. "They're raising their hands." There are four figures, positioned in a trapezoid-shaped formation, and all four of them are standing with their hands facing upward. Four YouTubers are still alive. This is what they have to do.

Two minutes later, Andrea faces the statue with her hands in the air, and the three boys stand in similar positions. Their formation is identical to the one in the drawing.

"Think this is it?" Alex asks. "Nothing's happening!"

"Maybe we do this while we say this all together," Tyler pipes up.

 _"Speak to us, forgotten one,"_ four voices repeat in chorus, _"and steal the light from our eyes that we might see."_

There's a dramatic pause...and then, the statue lights up.

"Oh..." Joey looks back at the house for a moment. "What's going on?"

Something falls out of the statue, startling the group. "Omigod." Andrea's nerves feel like frayed electrical cords. She does _not_ like surprises. She's had enough surprises for one night.

 

"It's a book," says Tyler. He opens it and reads what is inside, while Joey and the others look on in confused horror.

_The Sorceress has used the final gem to summon a Devourer to aid in her end game. To retrieve the gem, you must venture into the Dark Dimension, where it is being kept. Only the twin idols of the Cursed God allow passage. To recover the first one, you must make a phone call to hell and share secret words with its Gatekeeper._

Devourer? Dark Dimension? _Hell?_ What kind of story _is_ this?

Joey tries to sort things out. "That's the Devourer," he says, pointing at the monster inside the house. "We need to go to the Dark Dimension?"

"And call hell!" Tyler exclaims.

"Oh!" snorts Joey. "Let's see how the devil's doing!" He can't say that he's ever talked to the Devil himself, but...sometimes...it feels like he's in his mind...

"This is where we are," says Alex, who is examining the map that's drawn on the bottom of the page. "We have to go down..."

Tyler points. "We have to go that way. Okay."

"Okay, let's go," says Alex.

So they do.

 

Alex is still reeling from Alison's death, but it could've been worse. At least Tyler, Andrea, and Joey are still alive, and at least Alison's death means that two YouTubers will get to live instead of one.

The group runs, and they can see the Devourer chasing them from inside the house.

"Come on, you guys," pants Tyler.

"We need two more gems," Alex reminds them, "and then we can get the crown to stop the queen!" _Two more deaths._ That part remains unspoken.

The Devourer crashes against a window.

"Aah!" Joey cries. "He's following us! Okay."

They come across a red telephone booth. "This must be where we call hell," Tyler realizes aloud. "Should I do it?"

"Yes!" shouts Alex. "Call!"

"Okay."

Tyler steps into the telephone booth, book in hand, obviously trying to maintain a brave face. Alex shoots an encouraging smile his way. _Come on, Ty. You've got this._

 

Tyler is about to call _literal hell,_ and that isn't even the weirdest thing he's _done_ here. That says something.

There's a note in the booth.

"What does it say?" Andrea wants to know.

_Please have your telephone billet number ready to operate the telephone._

"Is it in the book?" is Andrea's follow-up question.

Alex turns and points. "There's a chest over here, too."

Well, Tyler isn't sure what the telephone number is, but he might as well give this thing a shot anyway. He picks up the phone and puts it to his ear, wondering what hell is going to sound like.

 _"Telephone billet number, please,"_ says a heavily accented female voice. _"Telephone billet number, please."_

"We don't have it!" Joey hisses. "We don't have it yet!"

_"Telephone billet—"_

Tyler hangs up.

"Try to talk back," says Alex.

Tyler considers it, but that's before he spots a small cabinet. "Wait. You guys." He opens it. "Oh." There's a map, a bottle of sulfur, and a note.

_The gatekeeper of hell hides his secret words among the living. The ritual to reveal their location must be performed in the lounge by three participants who must first drink the blood of a demon._

Joey's mouth hangs open in shock. "Three of us have to go in with _him?"_

Alex takes the sulfur bottle. "What is this sulfur for?" he wonders, twisting the cap back and forth as he talks.

Tyler smiles at his old friend. _Well, Alex, I'm glad you asked._

He keeps reading.

_A drop of sulfur in the correct liquor bottle will reveal the one containing demon's blood._

"So we have to put _those_ in liquor bottles," explains Tyler, gesturing to the bottle in Alex's hands, "to see which ones are the ones with demon blood."

"Oh," says Joey. "Okay."

 

Andrea grabs the map, opens it, and shows it to the group. As soon as she does, Alex realizes _exactly_ what they're dealing with. "Yep." There's no mistaking that demonic triangle. "We're doing a seance."

"What does it say?" asks Tyler.

_Place a copper basin at the center and six candles around, forming a triangle._

"Okay." Joey takes command. "So, guys, we need to go in there, and we need to find the basin, we need to find candles, we need to find glasses..."

"Well, _somebody_ needs to distract him so we can do all that," Alex points out. They can't have the Devourer roaming around while they set up the seance. _Someone's_ got to risk his wrath to keep the others safe.

"I wanna go in and find the stuff," says Joey.

"I wanna find the stuff," says Tyler.

"I wanna find the stuff," says Andrea.

 _Dammit._ "So _I'm_ the decoy?" Alex does _not_ want to be within _fifty feet_ of Satan's spawn, let _alone_ be the one to distract him. He's done enough! He needs a break! Let someone _else_ go out there for a change!

"You're _so_ fast," says Tyler in reassuring tones.

"You guys!" Alex protests. "Did you _see_ him?!?"

"You're the quickest."

"You're the fastest."

"Omigosh." He's fully prepared to say no. "I...I..." His attempts to stammer out a refusal are destroyed by the looks on his friends' faces. "Okay. Okay. Okay." He's been pulling his weight this _entire_ time, and the _one_ time he says _doesn't_ want to do this...

Oh, well. He'll do it. But only because he'll hate himself if he doesn't.

"You go on one side of the house," says Joey, "and you sneak in—"

Alex cuts him off. "How will I let you know if he's coming back?"

"You yell!" Joey replies.

"The highest pitch you've got," adds Tyler.

"Yeah." Joey steals a glimpse at the waiting Devourer. "Go over there and test it. See if he'll follow you."

The words _I don't want to_ once again tremble on the tip of Alex's tongue, but he knows that it's too late to back out now. So he walks towards the Devourer, and sure enough, the monster tracks his every move. "Oh." _I'm scared._ "He's following me."

"He is?" Joey asks.

"Yeah." Alex takes a deep breath and steps through the door. "Hey!" he shouts. "Come on! Let's go!"

The Devourer charges at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The gang takes action, but will it be enough? Also, Alex comes close to death, and Andrea drinks blood again.


	47. Outwit, Outrun, Outlast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will the gang be able to recover the twin idols without falling victim to the Devourer? Or is this the end of their collective lives?

Alex runs outside. The Devourer attempts to give chase, but he screeches to a halt at the open door.

"I'm right here!" Alex shouts.

The Devourer reaches a claw through the door, only for an invisible force field to trap him inside the house. His next roar is raw, ferocious, and tinged with disappointment.

"You guys!" It all makes sense now. "He's stuck! He can't come out!" Alex feels a _lot_ better about his chances of survival. He's completely safe from the Devourer's clutches...as long as he's outside.

Naturally, because he's an idiot, he charges inside.

He runs for the staircase. The Devourer, clearly overjoyed at having a human within murdering distance, charges after him. _Shoot._ Alex keeps running. _Come on, guys. Do your thing, and I'll do mine, and hopefully no one will die._

 

While Alex distracts the Devourer, Joey sneaks into the house alongside Tyler and Andrea. He's no stranger to rituals, of course, but this is the first time he's ever attempted to do one with a monster in the house. Hopefully, nothing goes wrong.

Who is he kidding? He's Joey Graceffa. Everything _always_ goes wrong when he's around.

"Grab candles," orders Andrea.

Joey says "okay" and begins collecting candles. "Here's candles. There's two here."

"Get the basin," Tyler says. "Get the basin."

The Devourer's growls sound close. _Too_ close.

_Don't think about the Devourer._

Tyler and Andrea have both collected armfuls of candles. "Okay." Joey, who is currently organizing the materials, grabs the basin. "We have to place this in the center," he says, doing just that.

"Follow the lines on the floor," Andrea tells them. "That'll make it easy."

Joey places his first candle. "This'll be the bottom of the triangle."

Then, just as everything is going well, the Devourer appears.

Joey screams. He drops his candles and runs for cover, his heart beating a thousand times per second. "Omigod omigod omigod omigod. Hide!" He ducks behind a curtain. "Hide! Hide! Hide!" _I'm toast if he finds me!_ "Omigosh!" _Please leave, please leave, please leave..._

"Hey!"

The Devourer turns his head.

Alex steps into the light. "I'm right here!" His voice is proud and defiant, as if he's daring the Devourer to try and take his life. While the others watch from their hiding places, he slicks back his hair, standing his ground as the monster lumbers towards him. There's a flash of fear in his brown eyes, but it's gone within seconds.

Joey's heart, which only recently was beating out of control, is now on the verge of falling apart. This is _his_ fault. Fifteen people are dead, a monster is terrorizing those who remain, and none of it would've happened had _he_ just left well enough alone. "Alex." The name comes out as a shaky plea of despair. _Please, God, let him live. Tyler and Andrea, too. I don't care what happens to me. Just make sure that they're safe when all is said and done._

_I don't want any more of my friends to die._

 

For a few moments, Alex doesn't move. Then, just as Andrea begins to worry about his safety, he heads for the stairs, and the Devourer continues to follow him.

The other three emerge from their hiding places. "Let's do this, guys," Joey breathes. "Thank God for Alex. Okay. We have to be quick." He runs back to their candle collection and rereads the note. "Okay. Six candles. We only need six candles."

"We're good," says Tyler. "We're good."

So they are. After all, they have _way_ more than six candles.

Joey continues reading.

_Place group of glasses as shown._

_Oh, dammit._ "We need the glasses," Andrea realizes aloud.

"What glasses?" asks Joey.

"Here." Andrea points, then runs over to get the glasses.

"Do we have the glasses as shown?" Joey checks the map. "There needs to be three at the bottom here."

Andrea has a bad feeling about this.

 

The Devourer is at the top of the stairs. Alex waits at the bottom, and as the Devourer turns around, the Novelist smirks at him. "Having fun?" He feels a bit cocky. This isn't _quite_ as bad as he thought he would be.

Of course, the Devourer takes the bait.

"Here he comes!" Alex calls to his friends. "Down the stairs!"

He can't see the others, but he hears footsteps, so he assumes that they're going back into hiding. He darts into the library, the Devourer hot on his trail.

It's then that Alex Wassabi realizes that he's made a _huge_ mistake. One of the library's two exits is locked from the outside, and the other (the way he just entered through) is blocked off by the approaching Devourer. He's cornered. He got overconfident, and now, he's about to pay the ultimate price.

Before he has time to run, the Devourer pushes him against a window and claims him as his victim.

"Aah!" he screams as he's devoured. "I got taken!" He's dying, he's breaking apart, it hurts it hurts _it hurts_ —

He's floating.

_Is this what it's like to be dead?_

He tries to call Lauren's name, but he can't speak. He moves through the darkness, heading towards a brilliant light that he assumes is heaven (or hell; he doesn't really know what he deserves at this point). When he reaches the light, he sees the library through beady eyes, and he realizes that he's trapped inside the Devourer himself.

 _The Devourer._ It all makes sense. _He doesn't kill. He devours souls. I'm a soul now, and I'm stuck here, and I_ can't _move on to the afterlife. I'm never going to see Lauren or my friends again._

This, for Alex, is a fate worse than death.

The Devourer is walking down the hall, searching for Alex's three surviving friends. It occurs to Alex that they could join him here. _What happens if he catches us all? Do we stay here forever? Does he digest us into oblivion?_

He doesn't want to find out. It's too late for him, but Joey, Andrea, and Tyler still have a chance. They'll live. They _have_ to.

 

Alex's screams evaporate, and Joey's stomach sinks. "Guys, he was taken." He uses the word "taken" instead of "killed" because he's seen this before, with other friends, a thousand nights ago. There's a slim-but-visible chance that Alex Wassabi is still alive.

"He was?" asks Andrea. "Are you sure?"

The Devourer reenters the room, apparently not satisfied with just Alex. Tyler hides behind a curtain, but Joey and Andrea are caught out in the open. "No," Andrea whimpers, more terrified than Joey has ever seen her. "No, no, no, no..."

"Run!" yells Joey.

They run outside, where they are safe from the Devourer's clutches, and the Devourer heads back the way he came. "Tyler!" shouts Andrea. "He's coming!" She turns to Joey. "What are we gonna do?"

"I have an idea for right now," says Joey. _"You_ be the distraction."

"Me?"

"Yeah." Alex is gone, and Tyler wouldn't last a minute against the Devourer, and Joey's _still_ not comfortable with doing the job himself. "Keep him distracted by the window at the library. Okay?"

She nods.

 

Well, Andrea is the new distraction. She can't say that she's particularly thrilled about this job, seeing as how the former distraction may or may not be dead, but as long as she stays outside, she should be fine.

 _I_ have _to be fine. For Alison's sake._

She knocks against the first window she finds. The Devourer goes to the window, and for a moment, Andrea feels like her mission is a success. _He can't get me out here,_ she thinks. _I just gotta keep him looking out this window, and that'll give Joey and Tyler time to—_

__

__

That's when she sees Tyler, panic on his face, hiding behind a curtain...a curtain attached to the _same window_ she just led the Devourer to.

"Shit."

The Devourer turns his attention to the curtain, and Andrea knows in her heart that she's doomed her friend.

 

_No!_ Alex's soul sobs. _Not Tyler!_ Please _not Tyler!_ He tries to pound his fists against the walls of the Devourer's head, only to remember that he no longer has hands.

 

Tyler's _scared,_ and it _hurts,_ because Alex is _gone,_ and maybe he's _dead,_ and Tyler _never_ in a _million years_ thought that he'd outlive Alex, but he might have, and now the Devourer's got him right where he wants him.

_I'm dead. I'm doomed. I'm going to die. Oh, God, this is the end._

A clammy hand grips Tyler's shoulder. The Devourer slowly peels away the curtain, revealing the petrified Thespian within. "You guys!" Tyler screams. _Please! Someone help me! I don't wanna go!_

Joey jumps into view. "Look at me!" he shrieks at the Devourer, waving his arms around like he's trying to flag a train. "Look at me!"

Miraculously, the Devourer looks at him, giving Tyler a chance to duck out of the curtain and escape. "Joey!" he cries in relief. He has _no idea_ how that worked, but he's _so thankful_ to Joey for saving his life. Their alliance looks stronger than ever.

"Come on, Tyler!" calls Joey. "Come! Come! Come!"

Tyler somehow manages to _not_ drop the sulfur bottle as he runs to rejoin Joey. "What are you doing?" he squeaks.

"She's distracting him," says Joey, indicating Andrea, who's recaptured the Devourer's attention. "She's bringing him to the library."

There's a collection of bottles nearby. "We need to use the sulfur," Tyler whispers.

Joey frowns. "Sulfur?"

"Yes! We'll be able to tell which is the demon's blood by putting it in the liquid...I think." He puts sulfur in one of the bottles, and nothing happens. "No. Try that one."

"What's gonna happen?" Joey asks.

"I don't know. We'll be able to tell."

Joey slips a sulfur pill into another bottle. "That's not it."

 _It's here somewhere,_ thinks Tyler. _We just gotta keep looking._

 

Andrea is trying everything she can to distract the Devourer. So far, it seems to be working.

He follows her through the windows, away from Joey and Tyler. One of his hands is against the glass, and she mimics him, holding out her own hand in a mirror image of his efforts to get to her. "Do you have a gem?" she asks sweetly. "Do you know what I'm talking about?"

Since he is dumb, he doesn't.

 

Alex almost giggles.

 

Finally, Joey and Tyler find the bottle of demon's blood. When Tyler pops the sulfur into it, it bubbles over, fizzing its contents all over the place like a Coke and Mentos experiment.

 _Thank God that's_ all _it did._

"This is it," says Joey.

Tyler makes a face and uses his hand to stop the bottle from overflowing. If he survives the ritual, he'll probably have to wash his hands afterwards.

"Wait." Joey's expression twists into the epitome of bewilderment. "How much do we need to drink of it?"

"I don't know," admits Tyler.

A noise causes them to duck behind the desk. Fortunately, it turns out to be nothing, and they get back to work.

"It says 'drink the blood of a demon,'" says Joey, consulting their book. "Here. Let's just split it." He takes a swig first, then hands the bottle to Tyler.

 _Well,_ sighs Tyler to himself, _I already ate meat pie made out of kids, so what else do I have to lose?_ He drinks from the bottle. The sour-tasting contents burn their way down his throat, and he makes a face. _I think I preferred the pie._

 

"Can't get out here!" taunts Andrea in a singsong voice.

All of a sudden, the Devourer gets bored and turns away from the window.

"No, no, no!" Andrea claps her hands in a desperate attempt to regain his attention. "Look over here! Over here!" _Goddamnit. He's getting bored. I should've seen this coming._

The Devourer walks away.

Andrea taps against the window. "No! Come here! Come here! Come here!" When she realizes that the Devourer is not coming back, her blood runs cold at the thought of what might happen to Joey and Tyler. "Oh, shit..."

 

 _He's coming._ Alex knows that it's impossible for him to think telepathically to Tyler and Joey, but he tries anyway. _Run. Don't let him find you._

 

"Let's put these shot glasses around now," says Joey, grabbing the tray of empty glasses. "Okay." He and Tyler place them in their proper positions. "Three back here."

The Devourer bursts into the room.

Joey pales. "Tyler! Hide!"

Tyler doesn't need the encouragement. He looks for a place to hide, as does Joey, but the Devourer notices the boys and chases them around the couch. Tyler shouts the word "run" repeatedly, while Joey feels his entire body transition into survival mode. _He won't get me,_ insist his fight-or-flight reflexes. _No matter what happens, I_ won't _let him get me._

Both Joey and Tyler make it outside, much to their relief. "Where did he come from?" Joey shrieks as soon as they're safe.

"You guys!" Andrea arrives on the scene. "I had him for _so_ long. He just gets bored."

Joey is glad to see that she's still alive. "We found the demon's blood. You need to take a sip. All participants must."

"Okay, then one of you guys needs to take over distracting, and I'll go take a sip," she replies.

 _One of us?_ Joey's stomach sours. He _knows_ that it's a bad idea to send Tyler "Screams at Everything" Oakley to face the Devourer, and no one knows if Alex is alive or dead, so... _that just leaves_ me, _doesn't it?_

Tyler seems to have the same idea. "Joey?"

Two minutes later, Joey is _sorely_ regretting that decision. "Come this way!" he screams as he runs up the stairs, the Devourer close behind him. "Omigod! Oh, jeez, he's following me!"

 

Andrea, glad to be on a break from Devourer-distracting duty, follows Tyler into the parlor. "Okay, where's the demon's blood?"

"Have a drink of this bottle," says Tyler, pointing to a brown bottle on the ground.

"This bottle?"

"This is demon's blood."

She picks up the bottle and takes a drink. It tastes just as bad as she was expecting. "Ugh." First she sucked blood out of a vampire's neck, and now, she's drinking demon blood. She feels like she's drank enough blood to supply a whole other human.

"What's next?" asks Tyler.

"We must stand inside the triangle and recite these words," says Andrea as Tyler abandons his beautiful coat on a nearby table. "That means we need all three of us to do that."

Tyler nods. "Joey!" he shouts. "We need you! Lock the Devourer someplace and get over here!"

 

When Joey hears Tyler's command, it hits him: _the library._ It's a fairly small room with only two exits, one of which is locked from the outside. So if he locks the other door while the Devourer is inside, they won't have to deal with him again for a while.

Of course, this requires luring the Devourer into the library...which _also_ happens to be the same place where he devoured (killed?) Alex.

Needless to say, Joey _doesn't_ want to do this.

But, despite his misgivings, he leads the Devourer into the library. Before he knows it, the Devourer has him trapped behind a chair, and he can almost feel the monster's hot breath on his face. "Tyler!" he cries, his heart in his mouth. "Open the door!"

He escapes from behind the chair and gets behind a desk instead, but the Devourer immediately jumps onto the desk. _Okay,_ thinks Joey as he uses another chair for protection. _This is where I die._

Much to his relief, a small opening allows him to speed past the Devourer and out the door. He locks it behind him, imprisoning the Devourer, who snarls with frustrated malice as Joey returns to his friends.

 

 _Yes!_ Alex cheers silently. _They did it!_ Even if he _is_ doomed to stay here for all eternity, Alex is comforted with the knowledge that the Devourer won't be able to inflict the same fate on his friends. They're _free._ They can do the ritual, find the twin idols, and keep going.

Even if they have to keep going without him.

He can't wallow in misery forever, especially since that's what the Sorceress and her cronies expect from him. So, as the Devourer shrieks with rage, Alex loses himself in thoughts of his old life, his friends, and the girl he still loves.

 

"Okay, ready?" asks Joey once they've reunited.

Andrea nods. "Hold hands."

Tyler grabs Joey's hand, then Andrea's, and the three YouTubers kneel down and recite the incantation. _"From the mouth of the abyss, we summon the Crystal of the Forsaken and the Lost, the Stone of the Damned. Release this secret to the world of the living."_

The Devourer roars in the distance. It sounds like he's in pain. Is that a side effect of the ritual?

A box opens. "That," says Joey, and they rush over to find a square crystal with words on it. "Quick. What is this?"

"Is it the phone number?" Andrea asks.

Joey squints. "Sanctum regnum."

"That might be the phone number we need to call," says Tyler. He doesn't speak Latin, so he doesn't know what "sanctum regnum" means, but whatever. "Let's go." _I hope it's not something creepy._

 

Alex is yanked out of his memories by a blinding purple light. _Huh?_ He's ripped away from the darkness. _What's happening? It hurts—_

He's outside the house. He's in his own body. He's fully alive again.

_How?_

His friends show up, and when they see him, they look like Christmas came early. "Alex!" There's joy in Tyler's voice. "What happened?"

"He got me," is all Alex can say. "I don't know why I'm back."

"Well, thank God you're back, because we just got this," says Tyler.

Joey shows off a crystal cube. "We did it."

_Sanctum regnum..._

Whatever it means, it's where they go from here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Tyler talks to Satan via payphone. Also, everyone reaches into something disgusting, a body is ignored, and an old friend returns.


	48. Are You There, Hell? It's Me, Tyler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for the powers of Hell to answer to Tyler Oakley.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, there is a thing that happens in this chapter that does not happen in the original: namely, something that they see. But I threw it in to add a little more horrific realism to the story.

"Just call them and read it," says Joey.

 _Okay._ It's Take Two on Tyler's conversation with hell itself, and he _still_ doesn't know why he agreed to do this. At least it's not going to hurt him. Right?

He picks up the phone.

It's the same woman from before, complete with the same accent. _"Telephone billet number, please. Telephone billet number, please."_

"Sanctum regnum?" Tyler squeaks.

_"Telephone billet number, please."_

"Sanctum regnum?"

_"Telephone billet number, please."_

"Okay, that's not it," sighs Joey. "It _has_ to be something else."

Tyler is _sorely_ disappointed. They went through _all_ that crap with the Devourer just to get these words, and there's _still more_ to do? "Is there anything else in the phone booth?" He scouts around. "Check that box."

"Wait, wait, wait, you guys," says Andrea. "There's a little..."

Alex understands. "Oh, wait! It's a latch!"

"Oh!" Tyler flips the latch, and a check falls out. The words _file in desk_ are stamped across it in red ink.

"File in desk..." Alex groans. "Is it in the room the demon's locked in?"

Andrea nods. "It's in the desk."

"No!" Joey moans.

 _My sentiments exactly._ Of _all_ the rooms they could've locked him in, they _had_ to lock him in the library, which _just so happens_ to be the _one_ room they need to get the phone number. Tonight has _not_ been their night.

 

"We need someone to lure him out of the library," Joey says. "Alex? Are you up for it?"

Alex rolls his eyes. _Me? Again?_ Really, _Joey? He already_ got _me once! Now I have to face him_ again? _Come on._ "Okay. Fine. But you guys better watch my back."

"We will," Tyler promises. "We won't let him hurt you."

Alex goes inside, unlocks one of the library doors, opens it, and sees the Devourer looking through one of the windows at Andrea. "Psst!" _Hey! Remember me? You devoured my soul not too long ago. I'm back! Do you want another crack at me?_

Apparently, the Devourer does, since he follows Alex out the door and into another room.

Alex escapes outside. _Ha! Take that! I'm_ not _going back to Soul Jail!_ "He's in this room!" he tells the others. "Go lock the door! Go close the door! Hurry!"

Andrea, Tyler, and Joey sneak into the library. Alex joins them just before they close the now-locked door.

 

They're safe from the Devourer (maybe), but their work has just begun. "The desk," says Andrea. "Look in the desk for a file."

They look in the desk, and they are greeted with files on top of files. "Omigosh, are you _kidding_ me?" Joey exclaims.

"Are you kidding me?" repeats Andrea as she shuffles through the files. _How many files are_ in _this thing? And how are we supposed to know which one is the right one?_

The Devourer starts banging on the locked library door.

"A key," says Alex, who has found a desk key with a red ribbon attached to it. "A key."

Andrea kneels down to face a bunch of locked drawers. "What if this key opens these?"

They try it. It works. Of _course_ it works. Their world is ruled by keys, combinations, monsters, and death. Andrea's been in the Victorian era for eight and a half hours, but it feels like she's been stuck here all her life.

"Oh, there's more," remarks Alex.

"Here." Joey holds out a hand. "Give me the key."

The four of them keep searching. For a while, they don't find anything. Then, at last, Joey shouts "Wait! I found something!"

Andrea smiles.

"What did you find?" Tyler asks.

Joey unfolds a piece of paper to reveal the telephone billet number. "I have it!" he yells. "Let's go!"

They head back outside. Andrea shuts the door behind her. _This time,_ she thinks, _the devil had_ better _pick up, or else I'm gonna go to hell and punch him in the face._

 

_"Telephone billet number, please."_

Tyler's on the phone with hell again, only this time, he knows _exactly_ what to say. "Eight, three, five, two, one, nine?"

_"Connecting you now."_

Everyone gasps in relief. "We did it," says Joey. "Okay."

Yeah, they did it...but now comes the hard part. "I'm about to call _hell!"_ Tyler has never talked to hell before. What if he says the wrong thing? What if he offends some demonic entity, and then that demonic entity decides to get revenge?

A new voice comes on the phone. It's a male voice, and it sneers _"What do you seek?"_ in deep, unnatural tones.

"I don't know," murmurs Joey.

"We need gems!" Alex shouts.

"Hold on." Joey flips through his little book. _"To recover the first one, you must make..._ oh! We need, um, the idol!"

"We need the idol..." Tyler stammers into the phone.

Joey continues. "We need the twin idol of the Cursed God."

Tyler's heart is racing. "That's the twin idol of the Cursed God, please," he says, as if he's placing an order at the devil's Starbucks.

"Does he know where it is?" asks Alex.

 _"Such a prize cannot be given freely,"_ says the voice.

Tyler nods. "Yes." He's heard stories about people selling their souls to the devil. Is that what's going to happen to him? Will he have to lose his soul in order to get the idol? If so, he's not sure if he's okay with that.

_"What are the words you will give in exchange?"_

Oh. Well, _that's_ fine. Tyler takes the crystal cube from Andrea and holds it up to the light. "Oh, I'll give you...sanctum regnum." He shrugs.

The voice laughs maliciously.

"Oh, no," says Alex.

Andrea frowns. "What does that mean?"

 _"Mortal, what you have spoken will haunt you forever,"_ warns the voice, and all the hairs on Tyler's body stand on end. _"The Dark Dimension drives all who enter mad."_

Nearby, a box opens. Evil laughter rings throughout the night.

Tyler hangs up the phone and steps out of the booth, his shoulders shaking. _I've been cursed._ He tries to calm himself down, but the demon's words echo throughout his mind. _The Dark Dimension...something terrible is going to happen there._

_Something that might be enough to drive me mad._

 

"A box opened," says Alex, and they all go to investigate.

Joey reaches inside. "There's something..." He grabs a smooth stone object and takes it out of the box. "What the heck?" It turns out to be the first of the two twin idols. There's also a note.

_My twin lies in watery darkness._

"The pool," realizes Alex. "The other one's in the pool. We need two."

"Let's go look," says Tyler.

Joey hasn't been to (or even _thought_ about) the pool in quite a while. The last time he was there, he watched a swimming competition, followed by the execution of a man who was once his friend.

He grimaces at the grisly memory.

 

The pool was the site of Alex's greatest triumph of the night, yet he can't think about it without pain in the pit of his stomach. His anger at DeStorm has dulled considerably over the last several hours, and while he's not sorry for what he did, he mourns the men they both might've been if not for this awful house.

DeStorm Power's body still rests at the bottom of the pool. No one acknowledges it. Alex can't even bring himself to look.

_We could've been friends..._

But his corpse is not the only thing in the pool. "I see a rope," says Andrea, pointing. "I see a rope."

The rope is attached to a chest of some kind. "What is that?" questions Joey.

"That must be the other twin idol!" Tyler replies.

"Okay." Joey approaches the pool. "Here."

"Do you need help?" Andrea asks.

Tyler bites his lip. "Joey, be careful."

Joey uses the rope to pull the chest out of the water. "Omigosh," he complains, "this is heavy." It takes a lot of effort for him to hoist it out of the pool. Alex almost offers to help, but manages to stay quiet.

"Omigosh, it's full of water," observes Andrea.

Together, the four of them untie the rope from the chest, which is locked with both a traditional lock _and_ three tiny combination locks. "There's a note on it," says Joey.

_To uncage the second twin, one must reach into the mouth of a demon and tear out its tongue._

Normally, Alex would ask _"how on earth are we supposed to even_ find _a demon, let_ alone _rip its tongue out?"_ But this is Joey's house. If there are vampires, spider women, ice queens, werewolves, and Devourers, then there are probably demons here as well.

"Mouth of a _demon?"_ Tyler gasps.

Alex's first thought is of the stone lion that decorates the pool. "Is this a demon?"

"I mean, it _might_ be," says Joey.

Andrea gets up. "Is there a tongue?" she mutters as she walks towards it.

"Be careful!" Alex calls after her. He knows how dangerous demons can be.

 

Joey has dealt with far too many demons in his life, and he isn't eager to meet another one. But he keeps his mouth shut and looks on as Andrea tries to pull a tongue out of the mouth of a stone lion.

"Nothing?" asks Alex.

"Nothing," Andrea confirms.

"Grab its tongue!" says Joey.

Andrea shakes her head. "It doesn't come out."

"Maybe it's the demon that we left in the house?" suggests Tyler.

Joey flinches at the mention of the Devourer. "Uh, I don't think we can go close to him without him ripping _our_ tongue out, okay?" If stealing the Devourer's tongue is _actually_ the answer, he might as well just kill himself right now and get it over with.

"We have one idol," says Alex. "We need one more to get to the Dark Dimension."

"Then we need to open this box," Tyler responds.

"Okay." Joey _knows_ this stuff already. He doesn't need the others to remind him. "But we need to find the demon's... _tongue_...or whatever..."

"Does the idol have a tongue?" Andrea wants to know.

The idol doesn't have a tongue, but Tyler spots something else that could help. "Wait! There are symbols here!"

There are, indeed, three symbols on the idol.

"Do you think they're the same symbols that are on _this?"_ asks Tyler, positioning the chest so that its combination locks are visible. The combinations have symbols instead of numbers.

Joey looks from the chest to the idol and back again. "It might be, yeah."

"There are three symbols," says Alex. "So this one...a star..."

Tyler twists one of the combinations so that it's on the star symbol.

Alex turns the idol around. "And then that one..." 

"A squiggle." Tyler solves the second combination.

Alex turns the idol once more. "And lines," he concludes.

As soon as Tyler is done with all three combinations, a huge green light appears out of nowhere. Looking at it is enough to give Joey the creeps. _That's probably where the demon is,_ he thinks as his throat goes dry with trepidation.

"Should we go towards it?" asks Andrea. "Or is something gonna come out of it?"

None of them know. But they follow it anyway.

 

When Andrea hears Joey shout "What is _that?"_ with disbelieving fright, she's barely able to force herself to look. Then, when she _does_ look, she regrets it.

"Ew!"

There is a disgusting face embedded into the ground. It's bigger than Andrea's whole body, and its slobbery mouth is wide open, waiting for some unlucky soul to reach inside.

"Okay, this is definitely a demon face," whimpers Joey, "and that looks real slimy."

All of a sudden, Andrea doesn't feel well. "Omigod, yes, it is."

"You want _me_ to?" asks Tyler.

"Uh, yeah," says Joey. "Go for it. I'm all about you doing it."

Alex doesn't look comfortable with this. "What if it closes? It's not gonna close on you?"

Apparently, that is enough to squash Tyler's confidence. "Andrea?" His voice is nervously hopeful as he turns to her.

Andrea shrugs. "I'll do it." _Why not? I've done worse._

"The tongue," says Joey. "Grab the tongue."

She reaches into the mouth. "Ew!" she shrieks as she filters through gobs of slime. "Ew! Ew! Oh, whatever this is is _so_ gross." Her hand is covered in green goop, and she can't find the thing's tongue.

"Go in there!" advises Alex.

"Go deep!" Joey cheers. "Deeper! Deeper! Deeper! Come on, girl! Get your arm in there!"

Even Tyler, despite the nauseated look on his face, is encouraging. "Just go _really_ deep, hun."

 _What was that?_ Andrea instinctively yanks her arm out of the demon's mouth, causing all four YouTubers to scream. _I thought I felt something, but I don't know. Where is that tongue, anyway?_

"Did something grab you?" Tyler frets.

Andrea laughs, though she doesn't know why. "No."

"What do you feel?" asks Joey.

"No tongue," she says with a sigh, pulling herself to her feet. "I'm not finding anything." She feels like _such_ a failure.

Tyler gives it a try. "It could _not_ be deeper," he laugh-sobs as he works. He's not lying; it looks like he's close to putting his _head_ in there as well as his arm. "Omigod."

"Get on in there," giggles Joey, pushing Tyler deeper into the mess of demon saliva. Tyler yelps.

In the end, he, too, comes up empty.

Joey points out that "we might need someone with longer arms" and subsequently attempts the task himself. "What do you think it feels like?" he wonders, elbow-deep in the demon's maw, an oddly bewildered expression on his face.

"This is a big head," reasons Alex. "It has to be a big tongue."

But Joey's efforts are _also_ in vain. Andrea is beginning to think that they're _never_ going to find this thing.

Last but not least, Alex steps up.

"Try a different angle," says Tyler. "We _can't_ give up on this. If we want this idol, we _have_ to get this."

Alex gives no acknowledgment that he heard him. He's straining himself, feeling around in places the others didn't think to check, his arm entirely submerged in slime. "Oh, this is something," he finally says, and he pulls out a tiny package. "It's wrapped up."

Andrea feels relieved and sickened all at once.

 

As it turns out, the package Alex recovered is _not_ a tongue, but a key to unlock the chest. Joey is grateful for the metaphor.

"Be ready for whatever's about to happen," cautions Andrea as she unlocks the chest.

The lock comes off. "Ready?" asks Alex.

_Is that even a question?_

Sure enough, they find the second idol inside the box. "Got it," says Joey nonchalantly. They're one step closer to freedom. He should feel happy. Why doesn't he feel happy? "Is there a clue inside there?"

"There's a note," says Andrea.

Alex hands the note to Tyler, who reads it aloud.

_Two must be selected by the vote of the group to enter the Dark Dimension. Those chosen must claim a partner to help them._

_Oh, no._ Joey remembers a pair of electric chairs, a deadly game of ring toss, and a girl he failed to save. _A partner challenge? I_ suck _at those. If_ I'm _someone's only hope to survive..._

He'd rather risk his life. He doesn't want another Lele haunting his dreams.

"Hey!"

A woman with short blonde hair appears on the other side of the pool. She smiles a warm, familiar smile.

"Jetpack Girl!" shouts Alex.

She waves. "Follow me."

"She's alive?" Joey is _so_ relieved to see Jetpack Girl again, especially since they no longer have Alison to help them. Seeing a friendly face in this hellhole is the most amazing feeling in the world. It's almost enough to make Joey forget about the upcoming partner challenge.

Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: I know, I know, you guys are probably sick of this, but let's do another round of Voting Time. After all, we gotta find out who we could lose. Also, Joey keeps Lele's legacy alive.


	49. Deja Vu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone's grown to hate Voting Time, but it still must be done. Who will risk their lives in the Dark Dimension, and who will help their friends?

Jetpack Girl leads the group inside. "You saw that Devourer thing, right?"

"Yeah," says Joey. How could he forget?

"I'm pretty sure it's scared of those idol things," says Jetpack Girl, gesturing to the idols that Alex and Andrea carry, "so, like, keep them with you."

"Good to know," remarks Tyler.

They reach the parlor. "Should we just keep them on the table?" Andrea asks.

"Yeah." Joey nods. "Keep them around us."

Andrea and Alex place the twin idols on the table. The idols are a pair of stone guardians, protecting the group from the evils of the house. Joey wishes that they had the power to save whoever's about to die.

"What's your note say?" Jetpack Girl wants to know.

Joey rereads it. "It says two must be sel—"

Unearthly growls invade their ears. The Devourer is back.

"Hey!" Joey grabs an idol, as does Alex, and they show them off to their foe. "Stay back," says Joey. "Look what we have. You know the twin idols? Yep! Mmm-hmm!"

The Devourer backs away from the idols as if they're thermal detonators. Joey, who wants to make this thing _just_ as scared of them as they used to be of him, charges at him with his idol. The Devourer runs away.

Joey laughs. "Look at you now!" he coos vengefully. 

 

The Devourer's expression is _hilarious_ to Alex. _He thought he was a big, tough, bad demon, but a little tiny rock scared him!_

Once he's had his fun, Joey returns to the parlor, still carrying his idol. "Keep one with us," says Alex, who has already set his down in the doorway. "Just in case another one comes. One is good."

Joey puts his idol back on the table.

"It's time for y'all to conduct your vote," Jetpack Girl reminds them.

 _Right. A vote._ Alex has grown used to this process. At this point, it's nothing more than a preliminary ceremony before the pain begins.

 

"Do we wanna talk?" suggests Andrea.

"Yeah," Joey agrees. "Let's talk." He can't believe that they have to vote _again._ They've gone through _so_ much together, they're _finally_ bonding and getting stuff done as a team, and now, once again, they're about to lose one of their own. It's awful.

Alex frowns. "So how is this whole selecting process gonna work?"

"We're voting for whose life should be on the line," explains Tyler. "Jetpack Girl is going to reveal two people. They each will have a partner, and that partner is gonna try to help them win, to escape and be safe."

Joey sets his jaw. In memory of Lele, Gabbie, and everyone else who died, he's going to do the same thing he did last time around. "I have an idea. How about we each put our own names in?"

"I think that's fair," says Tyler. "We'll leave it up to fate, because it's not just us playing. It's all of us trying to save each other at this point."

Tyler's right. They are a team, and they must protect each other. There will be no more betrayals tonight.

Andrea's face is expressionless. "I'm in. Show your cards."

"Promise?" requests Tyler.

"Promise," they all agree.

One by one, the survivors step forward, show their cards, and put themselves in danger. Alex is first. Then Tyler. Then, Joey approaches the table, breathing heavily as he makes his selection. _I don't want to die,_ he frets to himself as he poses with his Savant card. _But I don't want any of them to die, either._

Last of all is Andrea, who smirks enigmatically while revealing her Mystic card. "You didn't trust me, Tyler?" she chortles.

Tyler grins at her.

They go back to their seats, ready for the reveal. Joey considers praying, but as Jetpack Girl shuffles the cards, he realizes that he has no idea what (or who) he wants to pray for.

 

Jetpack Girl prepares to draw a card.

"Here we go," says Alex, his voice hollow. He's done more challenges than anyone else here, and he'll admit it; he could use a break. But since all four of them are headed to the Dark Dimension no matter what, he'll most likely be forced to watch the death of _yet another_ friend. He shudders at the thought.

"Alex."

Alex sighs and slumps over in his seat. Fate is _not_ on his side tonight.

"Alex," repeats Joey, his voice an exhausted monotone.

 _We're close to the end,_ thinks Alex in a fruitless attempt to distract himself from the upcoming Dark Dimension death challenge. _Two more gems. It'll all be over soon._

 

"And..."

Andrea crosses her fingers behind her back. After what happened with the werewolves, something tells her that this particular challenge is where things go horribly wrong.

"Andrea."

"I knew it," she whispers. "I knew it. I knew it."

Tyler exhales.

It hits Andrea that _she could die._ She's been through a night of terror, fighting tooth and nail to stay alive, scheming her way through all sorts of morally grey scenarios...but if the worst happens, she'll be a corpse in the Dark Dimension, and none of it will matter anymore.

Including Alison's death.

_If I die, she died for nothing._

That, more than anything, is why she wants to live.

 

"Okay, you have to choose a partner," mumbles Joey.

Alex's eyes travel to where an anxious Tyler Oakley sits, and he thanks fate for not forcing him to go up against his best friend. _You're gonna live, Ty,_ his brain insists. _You're too good for this place. You're gonna get out, and you're gonna go home, and you're gonna tell the world what happened here._

_If I don't make it…_

He doesn't allow himself to finish that thought.

Instead, he mulls over his potential partner options. _Joey or Tyler._ Both are smart people, and both would be _huge_ helps in whatever the challenge is going to be. He'd probably have just as much of a chance with either of them.

But he _can't_ pick Tyler. Tyler doesn't deserve that kind of pressure. If they partner up, and Alex dies, Tyler will blame himself, and Alex won't be there to comfort him. On the other hand, if Tyler partners with Andrea, and Andrea dies, Alex can help Tyler understand that it _wasn't_ his fault, and they can move on. And, of course, if _Alex_ dies, Tyler will be comforted with the fact that he helped save Andrea's life.

So, for Tyler's sake, he won't choose him. That leaves the Savant.

"Well, together we defeated Dorian," he says, as if that's the real reason, "so I'm gonna go with Joey." _Trust me, Ty. You'll thank me later._

 

Joey's mouth says "Okay," but his mind is against this. _No! I'm an idiot! You don't want me!_

(Those words are heartbreakingly familiar.)

 

Andrea turns to Tyler, who, it seems, is her partner for this death match. "It's me and you." She forces a smile. "We got it."

The scared little boy who once cried on her shoulder disappears, replaced by a young man who wears an expression of grim determination. "I'll protect you as much as I can."

"Same," says Joey to Alex.

Silence fills the room. Andrea takes a moment to focus on the sound of her own breathing. She does not think of anything else—not Alison, not Tana, not the Dark Dimension, and certainly not her possible death. She breathes. She listens. For a moment, she is not afraid.

Unfortunately, the moment doesn't last.

 

As the group gets up to leave, a tidal wave of despair overwhelms Tyler's heart. Alex Wassabi and Andrea Russett are the two people who have been there for him this entire time, and now, he's about to lose one of them forever.

_It should've been me._

He, Tyler, is the weakest member of the team. He's done the least. He's more expendable than Alex and Andrea combined. If the world was fair, _he'd_ be the one to die in the Dark Dimension.

The selfish part of him, the part that wants to live, is _so freakin' glad_ that the world isn't fair.

The rest of him is already falling apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Four YouTubers enter the Dark Dimension. Only three can leave. Either Alex or Andrea _will_ perish at the hands of the Guardian, and there's nothing anyone can do about it.


	50. I'll Follow You Into the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Andrea vs. Alex in the Dark Dimension. With the help of Tyler and Joey respectively, they must search in darkness for a gem. Who will survive?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY SCHMOKE CHAPTER FIFTY. Between this novel and the last one, I've written 105 chapters of Escape the Night! Thank you to everyone for sticking with this story (and this series) for so long.

The four surviving YouTubers head downstairs, where they are confronted with a giant purple portal. _This must be the entrance to the Dark Dimension,_ thinks Andrea. She's quite bemused to find out that there's a dimension that could _possibly_ be darker than the one they're currently in, but whatever.

There's also a book. The book has what looks like a _mouth_ embedded into its cover. "Ew," Andrea groans. "Look at this." _As if I_ need _any more reasons to feel sick._

"Read it," says Alex.

She does.

_This is a one-way entrance to the Dark Dimension. The first team to recover the gem will be protected from its Guardian. The losing guest, but not their partner, will be sacrificed so the others might return._

Andrea forces herself not to cry. She's about to go to a strange new universe, farther away from home than ever before, and if she dies, she'll die in a place where no one will _ever_ find her. The others will go back to where they belong, but she'll rot in the Dark Dimension for all eternity.

_The gem of power is hidden in the most unlikely place. Leave no corpse unturned or pool of filth untouched. I have a secret on the last page to give you upon your return._

As she closes the book, Andrea commits those words to her memory banks. _No corpse unturned. No pool untouched._ She can still make it. She and Tyler will turn the Dark Dimension upside down if that's what it takes for her to stay alive.

 

Alex wonders what the secret is. He then wonders if he'll live long enough to find out.

"All right." Joey purses his lips. "So we know what we're doing, right? We're just searching for the gem. First one to find it comes out alive."

Andrea and Alex put the idols in their proper places at the portal. Once that's done, a whooshing sound is heard, and the portal opens to reveal a guard with a skullish face and broad soldiers. He glares at the group, and Alex realizes: _this is the Guardian. This is what's going to kill me or Andrea._

"Hello?" Joey squeaks.

The Guardian stands there for a moment, then moves aside to let them through the portal.

"Omigosh," says Joey.

Tyler looks worried. "Is this it?"

"You ready?" asks Andrea.

Alex is the first one through. He doesn't look back. He can't afford to look back. If he wants to survive, he _has_ to focus on what he came here to do. The familiar world that he's leaving behind can wait.

 

Joey, who's the last to enter the Dark Dimension, looks back. He catches one final glimpse of the Victorian era before it dissolves behind him. His house has terrorized him and his friends all night, but compared to the Dark Dimension, it seems like a safe haven.

 _You'll see it again,_ he reminds himself. _You just gotta make sure that Alex will as well._

Once the portal closes, the trapped YouTubers fling themselves into the search for the gem. The place is littered with all sorts of junk, including corpses, mangled hardware, and various unrecognizable items. Everyone goes a little crazy. They toss things aside, smash things on the ground, and absolutely _trash_ the already messy Dark Dimension.

Tyler's voice echoes throughout the darkness. "Anything?"

"Nothing," Alex replies.

Joey shatters some random object without thinking twice. "Bunch of _junk!"_ This universe could really use a housekeeper. It's hard to find an _elephant_ here, let _alone_ a gem.

 _Keep searching._ He clenches his jaw. _I will_ not _fail again._

 

Just like the pool challenge, this is basically a gem scavenger hunt, but Alex doesn't think that "scoop and check" is going to be of much help this time around. His only hope is to sift through the "junk," as Joey called it, and keep his eyes peeled for a glimpse of what they're looking for.

He tosses a skull aside. "I don't care." There's still a small part of him that doesn't mind death. It's small, but it's there. _Why am I trying?_ it murmurs. _I've lost so much. Maybe it would be better to just die..._

No. Not now. He _can't_ let go. If he does, it'll be an insult to everyone who died tonight, especially Lauren. He promised himself that he'd keep fighting until there was no point in fighting anymore. Live or die, he intends to keep that promise till the bitter end.

 

"Check over there," says Andrea, who is helping Tyler lift a large piece of wood.

He checks. "Nothing." He's doing his best to help Andrea find the gem, but he's never felt so conflicted in his life. Yes, he wants to save Andrea from that awful Guardian thing, but if he succeeds, it's gonna kill Alex, and he _still_ can't stand the thought of saying goodbye to either one of his friends.

For a moment, he wonders if there's a way to save them both.

Then, he remembers Liza, and his heart shatters.

 

Andrea is picking up everything she can. She's throwing things, breaking skulls, ripping out every drawer, and digging through the dirt, and she _still_ can't find that damn gem. If she wasn't so scared of dying, she'd be _beyond_ frustrated right now.

"What is unsuspecting?" Joey demands to know. "The most unsuspecting place..."

"Tyler, look in places you wouldn't think," Andrea advises her partner.

Alex, meanwhile, stomps on a rotten tree trunk. "Nothing!"

"It might be, like, taped to the side of something," Andrea mutters.

Tyler adjusts his glasses. "We can't leave _anything_ unturned." 

_Leave no corpse unturned or pool of filth untouched._

Andrea springs to her feet. _The note_ specifically _mentioned corpses. There are corpses right over there._ She races back over to the dead bodies. _This could be my way out._

"Oh," she moans. "That's a hand."

_It sucks. But I gotta do it._

 

"Maybe it's inside a candle?" suggests Joey.

Alex figures it's worth a shot, so he smashes one of the candles.

"No."

Since they've been searching for fifteen minutes with no success, Alex decides to have a talk with his partner. "I feel like it's right in front of us," he tells Joey. "It's, like, hidden in plain sight. It could be, like, taped up somewhere."

Joey nods nervously and gets back to work.

 

 _How many people have died here?_ Andrea frets as she continues to investigate the corpses. _How long have they been here? How long will_ I _be here? How much longer do I have to live?_

"Have we checked everything?" Alex shouts.

Joey twitches. "I feel like we've literally, like—"

There it is. The gem. She did it. She _won._

She grabs it immediately. "I found it!" she screams, jumping up and down while waving it in the air. "Omigod, I found it! I found it! I found it!"

Tyler runs to join her. As she pulls him into a hug, relief floods every molecule of her body. _I found the gem!_ She's close to tears. _I did it! I'm going to live!_

 

_I'm going to die._

Alex has felt a plethora of painful emotions during his time in the Victorian era—despair, grief, rage, and even fear. But now, as certain death approaches, the only thing he feels is a sort of hollow numbness unlike anything he's ever felt before.

Andrea untangles herself from Tyler. "Oh, God." She sees the Guardian heading towards them, and her eyes widen. "Alex!"

Joey steps forward, his hands balled into fists, but Alex catches his eye and shakes his head. _Joey, don't. It's okay. You tried your best. This is a game, just like all the others, and we lost. That's all there is to it._ He turns to Tyler, who's staring at him with a look of devastated realization on his face. _Be safe, Ty._ He smiles sadly at his friend. _Be strong. I believe in you._

No one else was able to escape their fate. Not Liza. Not Tana. Not Gabbie. Not even Alison. Alex watched them struggle, scream, and cry, but all in vain.

So when the Guardian grabs him by his shoulders and marches him towards his doom, he doesn't fight back. Instead, he thinks of Lauren, and he defiantly conjures up an image from when they both were happy and alive.

"Alex!"

_"Don't!"_

_Do it quickly, you bastard,_ he silently growls as he's thrown onto the ground. _Get it over with. I'm not afraid of you._

The Guardian draws his dagger.

_I'm sorry, Lauren. I love you. I'll see you soon._

For a few seconds, the world is a mix of agony and blood. But the pain is soon overwhelmed by the scent of Lauren's perfume, and Alex dies in the arms of a memory.

 

 _Don't just stand there!_ screams Tyler's conscience. _Help him! Save him! Do_ something, _dammit!_

But his body refuses to move, and he watches, frozen in shock, as Alex Wassabi is murdered right in front of his eyes.

"Omigod," says Joey.

Alex goes limp against the ground. Tyler blinks once, twice, trying to pretend that _it's not real, it's just a nightmare, the Dark Dimension is messing with me, he's going to get back up, he's_ Alex, _he's not supposed to die..._

The portal reopens.

"You guys," Tyler whimpers, "the portal." He runs towards it, desperate to get away from what he just witnessed. The other two survivors follow his lead.

Tyler goes through the portal. He's back in the Victorian era, still (somehow) alive, but he certainly doesn't _feel_ like it. _What you have spoken will haunt you forever,_ chuckles a demonic voice in his mind. _The Dark Dimension drives all who enter mad._

Andrea and Joey follow Tyler into the room. For half a second, Tyler's heart burns with the desire to go back for Alex, but the portal closes before he has the chance.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Andrea grabs the book. "We need this."

"Yeah, we need that," Joey agrees.

They run up the stairs and back into the parlor. Every step sends another avalanche of pain through Tyler's soul, and by the time they reach the parlor, he's in absolute anguish. He topples onto the couch, his head in his hands, his spirit in shambles, ready to burst into grief-stricken tears for his best friend.

Then, before he can fall apart, he remembers.

_"You're tougher than you think you are," Alex insists as he wraps an arm around him. "If I don't make it...you gotta live. Okay?"_

_"Okay," responds Tyler. "I'll try."_

_"Promise?"_

Tyler takes a deep breath, and the tears that he was about to cry evaporate. He will be brave. He will face the Sorceress, and he will make her pay for everything she's put them through. He will avenge his friends. He will be the hero that Alex knew he could be.

_"Promise."_

Alex Wassabi, the one that Tyler thought would outlive everyone, is gone. Tyler's fear of this house has died with him.

 

If Joey wants to survive, he _can't_ dwell on what-ifs or could've-beens, because that just means despair and devastation. _Keep moving. Leave the past behind you. Focus on the now._

And yet...Alex's death...the fact that he failed _another_ person who needed his help...it eats at him. The guilt won't go away.

"All right," says Andrea. "Let's put them in."

"Put 'em in," repeats Tyler.

So Joey and Andrea take two gems—one for a vampire warrior, the other for a human one—and place them in the gem map with their five siblings. The gem map is almost full.

"We're still missing one," Tyler points out.

He's right. "How did that happen?" Joey complains, even though he already knows the answer.

"It was the ice queen," Andrea explains. "She never gave us the gem."

"I don't understand," mumbles Joey. "Wait. It said something about a secret at the back of the book."

Tyler flips to the back and reads what's written there.

_Sometimes, wizards lie to get what they want and hide things in plain sight._

"Let me see." Joey takes the book, and it all becomes depressingly clear. "No, remember? Okay. Think back to the Ice Witch. That's where we didn't get the gem. The wizard..."

Andrea understands. "Was that Sireen?"

 _"She's_ a wizard," says Tyler. "Maybe she hid it in plain sight?"

"Wait."

All eyes travel to the compass, which still sits on the mantlepiece. Andrea goes and gets it.

"Hold on." Joey squints at the center of the compass. "Is that the gem?"

"Can you tear it out?" Tyler asks Joey.

Joey tries to open the compass. "Wait." He gasps. There's a mechanism on the back that allows it to be opened easily. "Are you freakin' _kidding_ me?"

"We had it the _whole time?"_ exclaims a dumbfounded Andrea.

Sure enough, it's inside the compass. "What the heck?" This is unbelievable. They betrayed and killed Tana Mongeau for a gem that they already had in their possession. She didn't have to die. They didn't even have to go down the Path of Betrayal in the first place.

Joey has an overwhelming urge to find Sireen and strangle her.

Tyler, who's usually the "shook" one of the group, doesn't seem to be surprised at all. "Put it in!" is all he says. "That's it!"

"Okay, guys." Joey prepares to insert the final gem into the gem map. "This is the last crystal. This is the last gem."

"This is our ticket out," says Andrea.

The gem glows between Joey’s fingers. _Let this be the end,_ he prays. _No more monsters. No more deaths. Please. Let us go home._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Alex. The strongest don't always survive. May you and Lauren find happiness in whatever life comes next.  
> Next chapter: Will Joey, Tyler, and Andrea _finally_ be able to leave this hellhole? Or does the Sorceress have another trick up her sleeve?


	51. The Puppetmaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of the ten YouTubers who came to the Victoria era, only three are left, and none of them are the same people they were at the beginning of the night. It's time for them to find that crown and (hopefully) get out of here.

Joey slips the final gem into place. Almost immediately, the gem map swings open, and a purple light shines across the room. Everyone gasps. Once they've calmed down, they find the Crown of Oblivion inside the gem map itself.

"It's the crown."

"This is the crown!"

"What the heck..." mutters Joey as he holds the crown.

"You guys," breathes Andrea, "we did it."

Tyler's voice is solemn. "This is it."

Joey smiles. "We did it." He will wear the crown. The three survivors will defeat the Sorceress, break the spell, and return to 2017. This is what they fought for. This is what their friends died for. They're almost done with this place.

 

Tyler stares at the crown and smiles. After all they've endured tonight, the sight of the thing they've been fighting for seems like a wonderful dream.

"What do we do next?" Joey asks. "How do we defeat this awful Sorceress woman? Because I am _done_ with her."

"Apparently, all you need is the Crown of Oblivion," Tyler explains. "This is _it,_ right? It _must_ be it." He wants to believe that this is all they need to get back home, but he can't ignore the feeling that something will go wrong. This is the house that evil built. Something _always_ goes wrong.

 _But whatever goes wrong,_ he assures himself, _we_ will _take care of it. This house is_ not _going to hurt us anymore._

Andrea squints at the empty slots in the crown. "It looks like these are the same shape as the crystals."

"Omigosh." Joey starts inserting gems into the crown. They fit perfectly. "Careful with the gems."

Once all the gems are in the crown, the three of them happen to peek at the painting of the Sorceress. She's still there, in all her big-breasted glory, but there is someone behind her who wasn't there before: a blonde girl, trapped within a case, her hands against the glass.

"Who's that behind the Sorceress?" Joey wants to know.

"That was not there before," says Andrea.

Tyler shakes his head. "That's new."

"No, she's never been there," Joey agrees. "And it looks like she's in some sort of, like, casing or something."

Then, Andrea says "that looks like me a little bit," which sends a jolt of concern through Tyler's mind. Is that Andrea's fate? After everything they both did to get her out of the Dark Dimension alive, is she going to be kidnapped and trapped in glass? Will she _die_ there?

No. Of course not. The girl in the painting is blonde. He's just being irrational again.

 

"Okay, everything's not about _you,_ miss," Joey snarks at Andrea.

She smirks. "But it is." Surviving the Dark Dimension and retrieving the crown have _greatly_ improved her confidence. Yeah, Alex died, and that hurts to think about, but the worst is over. It's all uphill from here.

"Omigod." Joey holds the completed crown. "This looks _beautiful._ Even though each one of these gems represents one of our friends, like..." He grins. "We _did_ this." He looks down at the crown and notices something. "Are we missing one?"

One of the slots is still empty. Tyler frowns. "What do you think _that_ is?"

 _I think it's another puzzle to solve,_ sighs the pessimistic part of Andrea's brain.

Tyler pokes at a small brooch on Joey's shirt. "I always thought _this_ was something," he confesses.

"This?" Joey squeaks.

"Yeah."

"This," Joey informs him, "is called a brooch."

Tyler shrugs. "It's cute, honey."

Joey looks frustrated. "I swear," he growls, "if there's another thing missing that we need to find...another gem..." He glares around the room. "I'm going to murder someone."

"The Sorceress is who you're about to murder," clarifies Tyler.

"Okay!" says Joey. "Let's murder her!"

"Let's murder her," Tyler repeats, and Andrea can't believe that someone as sweet as Tyler Oakley is capable of saying such things. Then again, he's been through a lot, so it's probably just the stress...she hopes.

 

Thankfully, Andrea notices an open box, and there's a note inside. Joey breathes a sigh of relief and reads the note aloud.

_To complete the crown, the center stone must be recovered. Three from the future must stand as one on a high place in the foyer. Their leader must place the crown upon their head, and the stone will appear. The three cannot separate until it has touched the ground._

The remnants of the group head to the foyer, walk up the stairs, and stand together on the balcony overlooking the foyer. "Okay." Joey takes a deep breath. _We're almost home. It's almost over._ "So I place this on my head?"

"I think so," says Tyler.

Joey puts on the Crown of Oblivion. He can see Andrea toss a slightly jealous glance at him, but he pays her no mind. "Okay," he murmurs. "Now what?"

A small green gem floats out of the hands of a nearby stone angel.

"You guys?" gulps Andrea.

Tyler's face brightens. "That is it!"

"That's the stone," Andrea confirms.

The stone floats towards the ground. Joey wants to run to it, but he knows that he can't leave Tyler and Andrea until it's touched the floor. So he stands there, the crown still on his head, and waits.

Then, a door opens, and there's the Sorceress.

"Oh, no." Joey hasn't seen the Sorceress since she had Liza executed, but the sight of her is enough to send waves of anger and fear throughout his body. "Oh, no. Oh, no." She's reaching for the center gem. She's not supposed to touch that! "What are you doing?"

"All this time, it's been right here," she gloats.

 _No. No. This can't be happening._ "We _defeated_ you! We have the crown! No!"

But the Sorceress snatches the gem from the air, and Joey's blood boils. _How_ dare _she!_

A gun clicks behind him. "Take it off," orders Cash, his revolver aimed at the back of Joey's head.

Joey takes off the crown. As much as he wants to defy the evil Confederate, he _has_ to keep himself and his friends alive. They came all this way. They _can't_ die now.

"Nice and easy," chortles Cash as Joey gives up his ticket home.

 

 _You don't deserve it,_ fumes Tyler. _Eight of our friends died for that crown!_ "We earned that fair and square!" he snaps at Cash.

"Shut your mouth and get out of my way," is Cash's cold reply.

The angriest part of Tyler, the part that doesn't care anymore, wants to wrestle the crown out of Cash's calloused hands. It's only the threat of being shot that keeps him from attacking the Confederate general.

Joey blinks. "What's going on?"

"We played by your rules!" Tyler screams, his voice raw with rage. _We did what you said. Each of those gems represents a friend of mine, and every last one of them was a better person than you will ever be. You don't get to profit from their deaths!_

"You cheated!" adds Joey.

Cash hands the crown to the Sorceress. All at once, the truth of their mission becomes devastatingly clear. _We've been collecting these gems for the Sorceress._ The thought hits Tyler like a punch in the gut. _It was all for her. Lauren...Jesse...DeStorm...Liza...Tana...Gabbie...Alison...Alex...they all died so that she could rule the world. We were never meant to go back home._

"No," whimpers Joey. "No. No."

The Sorceress pops the center stone into the crown, then places it on her head.

Joey's voice deflates. "She has all the power now."

Tyler squeezes the bannister. It _can't_ end like this. He owes it to his friends to make sure that the Sorceress's evil plan does not succeed. As soon as he finds a way out of this nightmare, he'll do whatever it takes to bring her down.

Even if it costs him his life.

 

"I have waited more than a century to wear this crown," sighs the Sorceress. "It was stolen from me by the Society Against Evil and locked away, only to be restored by souls from the future. That is why I brought you all here." Her mouth contorts into a wicked sneer. "And in gratitude for such sacrifice, there is one more game to play."

She snaps her fingers.

"I don't like this," groans Andrea.

The Sorceress's malicious gaze falls upon the three YouTubers. "It's my favorite part. In the end, you all die!"

 _Really?_ thinks Joey. _Cause that's not_ my _favorite part._

Atticus the werewolf returns. So do the Devourer, one of the Prometheans, and Vera the vampire. "They're all back!" Joey shouts. "They're here!"

"Oh, _no,_ I knew it, I knew it," cries Andrea, who has suddenly gone pale. Vera catches her eye and licks her lips.

"The sun is about to rise," brags the Sorceress, "and my spell will be complete." She bursts into maniacal laughter. The lieutenants charge up the stairs, sprinting in the direction of the survivors.

Joey, Tyler, and Andrea run into a nearby room and close the door behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Our heroes' final task begins. Also, Joey commits murder again.


	52. Forsaken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Were all those deaths for nothing? Not if the survivors have anything to say about it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Escape the Night Season 3 is officially a go! That means another season of intrigue, despair, and death, as well as another novel for me to write.

Ten minutes ago, Andrea thought she was safe. Now, the Sorceress has the crown, and a slew of former foes are after her and her friends, including a vampire who has a creepy obsession with her. She hates this house so much.

_The sun is about to rise..._

It was ten minutes to two when they entered the Dark Dimension. Now, it's almost six. That place devoured four hours of valuable time.

"Omigod," Andrea gasps. "You guys..."

The doors burst open, and Cash saunters into the room. The three YouTubers scream in unison, run through another door, and slam it right in his smug face. "Lock it!" Tyler shouts. Andrea clicks the lock into place.

Cash bangs against the door. "Can't hide forever, you cowards!"

"Guys," says Joey once the noise dies down. "What the hell just happened? She _literally_ stole the crown from us. We did all that work!"

"We defeated _all_ of them, fair and square!" Andrea protests.

When Tyler speaks, his voice is firm and assertive. "They're _back._ It doesn't matter what happened now. They're _here."_

"Well, now we're literally trapped in whatever room this is," gripes Joey.

"You guys." Andrea has spent the past minute or so examining her surroundings, and she's found a dollhouse. The dollhouse features a glass box with a small blonde doll inside. "Doesn't this look like the girl that was, like, trapped in the box?"

Joey takes the doll out of her box. "I have no idea."

There's also a tiny book in the dollhouse. "Is there anything in the little book?" Andrea mutters. She takes a peek. "Wait!"

_My name is Riley, and I am the child the Sorceress once was...the child that was hurt and sealed away so she might become a monster. I am her link to the Cursed God's magic she wields. If you free me from my prison, the Sorceress will be stripped of her power. Please save me. I just want to go outside and play like all the other girls._

Andrea has not met Riley yet, but her heart already aches for her.

 

Joey hasn't played with dolls in a while, so he's not caught up on their lingo and what they like to do. But in order to save the day, he'll do his best to figure it out. "Basically, she has the crown, but we can still defeat her if we find this girl or something."

"This is Riley," says Andrea, holding up the blonde doll.

Tyler seems confused. "Isn't the little girl _her?_ Isn't that what it means?"

"Basically, the goodness left of the Sorceress is in this girl," Joey explains. He wonders if there is a good version of himself locked away somewhere as well.

Tyler turns his attention to two other dolls. "Well, what are these two girls? Just, like, the other girls who she wants to be with?"

 _"Please save me,"_ Joey repeats. _"I just want to go outside and play like all the other girls."_

Tyler springs to work. "Get her," he says, pointing to the doll in Joey's hands, "and put her here with them."

Joey puts the Riley doll with the others. "All right, girls, party time," he says affectionately.

A door slides open.

"Guys?" Andrea gasps.

"What the heck?" Joey runs to investigate, as do Tyler and Andrea. "A secret passage! That's so sick!"

"Here, let's go," says Tyler.

Andrea bites her lip. "Oh, God."

 

After the three of them walk through the passageway, they find another clue in the form of an open window and a book. Tyler's head hurts. Everything is happening too fast for him to process it properly. _Are we_ ever _gonna get out of here?_

"Omigosh." Joey looks out the window. "Okay, there's a ladder going out this window!"

_Of course there is._

Joey picks up the book, opens it, and reads it to the others.

_My prison in the treehouse will open when the three Leviathan seals are broken. They are painted in crimson light around the estate. The first one is hidden behind bricks, but be careful. The lieutenants are after you. If you get caught and are not rescued within five minutes, you will be killed._

"Omigod," breathes Tyler. He's trying to be brave for his friends' sake, but that doesn't stop terrifying images of the lieutenants from invading his mind. _This seems impossible!_ squeaks the cowardice that hasn't yet been squashed out of his system. _Every single lieutenant is out to get us! I don't want to find out how the Devourer, Cash, and all the others plan on killing me!_ He trembles. _I wish Alex was here..._

But Alex isn't here. Not anymore. And Tyler made a promise. So he takes a deep breath, stiffens his resolve, and approaches the window.

"Wait!" Joey points to a light in the distance. "Guys, look! That's the treehouse! That's where she's trapped!" He stares at the light for a moment, then smiles. "All right. Let's get out of here."

"Are we going down this?" Andrea asks.

"We have to," says Tyler.

Joey nods. "That's our only way out."

"Oh, Lord," gulps Andrea.

Tyler climbs down the ladder. _We will win,_ his mind whispers, and his heart begins to believe those beautiful words. _We will defeat the Sorceress. We will go home again._

 

The Sorceress stands on the brink of greatness, an unholy grin on her face, the weight of the Crown of Oblivion pressing against her sweat-stained brow. Eight lives, including seven from the modern world, have been extinguished to bring her this crown. Soon, her faithful lieutenants will destroy the three who remain. Everything is going according to plan.

"The time has come," she cackles, "for my army to enter the modern world where we belong!"

 

"All right," Joey says as soon as everyone is safely on the ground. "So we just need to find some sort of bricks."

"This is a whole wall of bricks," Andrea replies.

Tyler gets straight to the point. "This _whole mansion_ is made of bricks!" 

Joey laughs. Tyler _is_ right; the estate _is_ composed primarily of bricks. But the clue is probably referring to a specific set of bricks, so they're going to have to go brick-hunting...while being chased by lieutenants. What fun!

"If one of us gets caught," says Tyler. "we _have_ to save them."

"Absolutely," Joey agrees.

Tyler is clearly worried about this, but he seems to have gotten better at hiding his fear. "We have only five minutes."

Joey remembers a Journalist, a Hunter, and a similar chase. "Let's look for these Leviathan symbols." He can save Tyler and Andrea, just like he saved Eva and Oli before them. There is hope. As long as they're alive, there is hope.

 

The crown helps the Sorceress create a small hole in the fabric of space and time. It's still far too small to be used, but if she keeps working at it for about half an hour, it will expand into a portal for her army.

She laughs. How could she not? She's so close to the greatness she's always dreamed of. She will rule Time itself. The modern world will bend to her every whim, and no one will be able to fight against the power she has at her disposal.

As for Joey Graceffa, he will die here—alone, defeated, knowing that all of this happened because of him. She wishes she could keep him alive a little while longer, just so she could show him the world of pain and death she has reserved for those he once protected.

_The Brit and the brunette._

Eva Gutowski and Oli White turned down her invitation. Once her reign begins, they'll suffer for it.

 

"Keep an eye out," Tyler reminds his friends as the group makes their way forward. "You guys, there are lieutenants everywhere. We have to be a little bit sneakier." He loves Joey and Andrea too much to let them die at the hands of these lieutenants, and he _definitely_ doesn't want to die himself, so it's best if they conduct this Leviathan search as quietly as they can to avoid unwanted attention from murderous fiends.

Speaking of murderous fiends, there's the Promethean. "Run," hisses Joey, and they race towards the house.

_I wonder if this is the same Promethean that killed Gabbie?_

The three YouTubers reach the door, only to realize that the Devourer is waiting for them inside the house. Obviously, going back inside isn't an option anymore. "Come this way," Joey whispers. "Come this way."

They run down the stairs. Tyler can hear his heart pounding in his ears.

 

After all this time, the house has grown familiar to Andrea, and she knows how to get from Point A to Point B in as little time as possible. She hasn't decided yet whether or not she's proud of that.

"You're _dead!"_

Vera sprints across the lawn, a bloodthirsty smile on her pale face. _Oh, no._ Andrea holds back a scream and takes off running. _Please, God, if I die tonight, don't let_ her _be the one to kill me._

She runs past Atticus the werewolf and Cash the Confederate, and somehow, she makes it to a safe spot without dying.

"Okay, that was terrifying," says Joey in the understatement of the year. "I don't know what we do next."

Andrea's too freaked out about Vera to give him a coherent response. "Guys...I don't...this is insane."

Then, Joey notices a brick wall that wasn't there before, and they go to check it out. A large section of the wall is apparently composed of fake bricks, which the group pushes aside with ease. This creates a doorway into a brick hideout of sorts.

"There it is!" Joey points. "There's the symbol!"

The first Leviathan symbol shines on the opposite wall. Andrea smiles. They've found a seal. Now, they just need to break it.

Also, there's a shotgun lying around. "A gun!" Andrea exclaims. "We could use that."

Joey picks up the gun and fires a shot into the ground, causing Tyler and Andrea to jump away from him. _This is crazy._ Andrea's never felt so stressed out in all her life. _I just wanna go home. Can't I go home?_

"Wait, wait, wait!" She pulls a note out of the bricks. "Here! Guys! Guys!"

_The Blood of the Forsaken must be spread across the seal to break it._

"Was that..." Quite frankly, the Blood of the Forsaken could mean the blood of anyone they've voted to their deaths tonight. They were forsaken, weren't they? Forsaken and betrayed? Or is Andrea reading too much into this?

"Omigosh!" screams Joey. "Who is that?"

Vera has found them. She's headed straight for their little brick hideaway, still grinning from ear to ear, and Andrea wants to bury herself in bricks and never come out again. _She's here,_ her mind sobs as she grips Tyler's arm. _She's coming for me. I know she is. She said she claimed me, she wants my blood, oh God I'm going to die..._

Joey's eyes light up. "Guys! _Vera_ has the Blood of the Forsaken!" Before anyone can attempt to refute his claim, he points the gun at the vampire. "Stay back!" He shoots her.

Vera falls down dead, and Andrea suddenly feels a _lot_ better about her chances.

 

Joey's lost count of all the people he's killed, but at least this time, it was someone who deserved it. She was trying to kill them. It was self-defense. Now, they have one less lieutenant to deal with.

"We need her blood," says Andrea. "We need her blood."

So they walk to Vera's body. "Guys!" whispers Tyler. "Be quick!" He points at the balcony. "There's a lieutenant!"

Joey frowns. "Wait, _here?"_

"Guys..." murmurs Andrea.

"Get the blood." Tyler's tone is forceful. "Get the blood. Come on."

They stain their hands in Vera's blood, and then they start running again. Of course, that's when the werewolf pops up out of nowhere, because _good Lord this house has it out for us._ Fortunately, they're able to take refuge within their palace of bricks.

"All right," says Joey. "We need to put the blood on the seal."

The seal is pretty high up, and the YouTubers have to jump in order to reach it, but they're soon able to smear Vera's blood where it's supposed to go.

Andrea steps back. "Is that it? Did we do it?"

As if to answer her question, the Leviathan symbol disappears.

"That's one down," notes Tyler. "We need two more."

Joey grits his teeth. "All right." _Tonight is almost over._

 

It was already hard enough when they were facing one lieutenant at a time. Now, they're facing four (not counting the recently deceased Vera), which is going to make it a _lot_ harder for them to break the last two seals without someone being killed.

But Tyler's still going to do his best to get the job done. For everyone's sake.

Andrea shuffles through the bricks, looking for another clue. "There's _gotta_ be something more here," she sighs. "Is there _nothing?"_

Joey runs back to Vera's corpse. "Maybe _she_ has something."

As it turns out, he's right. Andrea finds a clue in Vera's pocket.

_The second seal can only be discussed—_

Before Andrea can finish, Atticus's howl fills the air, and Tyler fears that they're completely and utterly screwed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: The chase continues. Also, Andrea takes up an old job, Tyler almost slaps someone, and dynamite gets involved.


	53. A Game of Blood and Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One seal down. Two to go. Now, if only those lieutenants would leave Joey and his friends alone...

"Go!" Joey shrieks, and the three YouTubers run from the snarling werewolf.

"Over dinner!" Tyler keeps repeating. "Over dinner!"

Andrea's beginning to panic. "Omigod! Go! Go! Go!" _Alison died to save me from the werewolves. I can't let one kill me!_

Everyone runs in different directions. Andrea ends up on the staircase, watching Tyler scurry around the yard. "Tyler," she whispers. "Tyler. Tyler." The thought of losing Tyler sends her back down the staircase to protect him.

"Atticus, bring them to Daddy!" shouts the distant voice of Cash.

"Oh," murmurs Andrea, her stomach churning with fear. "I hate this."

Atticus howls.

Andrea joins Tyler behind a bush. _If we die,_ she thinks to herself, _at least neither of us will die alone._

 

Joey is completely alone at this point, and he's terrified. "Guys!" he calls out, but neither Tyler nor Andrea answer him.

"Where'd they go?" mutters Cash.

In a desperate attempt to find his friends, Joey dashes out into the open. Fortunately, he isn't spotted, and he ducks behind a tree. _Where are they?_ If they've been captured, he'll have to save them both on his own.

He's not sure he can do that.

 

Tyler scampers back up the staircase, Andrea by his side. "The dining room." _The second seal can only be discussed over dinner._ If they want to free Riley, they're going to have to go to the dining room and deal with whatever's there.

Of course, they have to get away from the lieutenants first.

"Give you guys a little warning shot," Cash announces, and a gunshot rings through the air. Tyler sees Andrea flinch. He wants to give her a hug, but he knows that there are more important things to worry about right now. He'll hug her later.

Once silence returns, Tyler remembers a lieutenant that they haven't encountered in a while. "Where's the alien? In this room?"

"Tyler, where are you?"

Tyler's heart leaps. "Joey!" He stands on the balcony, one arm raised, making sure that he's in a spot where Joey can see him. _He's okay. He's still okay._

"You're up there?" is Joey's next question.

Tyler waves his arm. "We're up here."

"I'm coming!" Joey screams, and he breaks into a sprint.

"Come!" screeches Andrea. "Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!"

Tyler bites his lip as he watches Joey run towards them. "Be careful..."

"He's fine," Andrea gasps.

But no sooner has she said that when Cash exclaims "A-ha! Come here!" and marches towards Joey, pistol at the ready. For a moment, Tyler expects the worst.

"Where is he?" whispers Andrea.

Tyler ducks out of sight.

Thankfully, Joey makes it to Tyler and Andrea alive. "Get down!" Tyler tells him, and the group huddles together in a small corner of the stairs.

Andrea points to a window, where the Devourer is visible. "He's inside the house," she explains, "so any time we're in the house, he'll be there."

"So one of us should distract him," Tyler concludes.

"I can do that," says Andrea.

"Okay," Joey agrees. "You'll distract him."

Tyler has only just started worrying about Andrea's safety when the Promethean arrives on the scene. The group hides behind the telephone booth from earlier and waits for him to pass by.

Once the Promethean is gone, Tyler's back on track. "We _have_ to go in the dining room." He doesn't want Andrea to face the Devourer alone, but there's no other way for them to get inside. He'll just have to hope for the best for her.

 

"You got this," says Joey to Andrea.

 _Do I?_ Andrea takes a deep breath. She doesn't know why she volunteered to distract the Devourer _again,_ but it's too late to back out of the job. "If you hear me scream," she says breathlessly, "you _gotta_ come save me! We only have five minutes!"

"We will save you," Tyler assures her. She believes him.

The boys leave, and Andrea sets to the task of distracting the Devourer. She dances in front of the window, her outfit jangling, as the creature watches. She feels like a fool.

 

The clue said something about eating dinner, so Tyler and Joey head directly for the dining room. Once they get there, they find the second Leviathan seal, shining like a beacon on one of the walls.

"The second seal," Joey breathes. "Okay. So what do we do?"

The room looks different than it did last time Tyler was in here. Before, it was littered with sweets, but those have since been replaced with several varieties of the most repulsive soup he's ever seen in his life. There's even a human head on a platter. Between this and the cannibal's pie, Tyler's pretty sure that it's going to be at _least_ a day before he feels hungry again.

He finds a giant dish at the center of the table, assumes that it's important, and whips off its lid. Inside is a dish full of cockroaches and a note.

Joey screams. "Omigod! Oh...okay..."

Tyler grabs the note and closes the lid. He doesn't want to look at the cockroaches anymore.

"Is there anything else in there?" Joey asks, reaching for the lid.

"No!" Tyler cries. "Close it!" He reads the note.

_Welcome to dinner for the damned. The first course has just started, but no one has arrived. Can't let it get cold! The chef will be furious! Would you be so kind to at least swallow a spoonful of soup at every plate?_

Joey's mouth hangs open in disgust. Tyler prepares his stomach.

 

Andrea has spent the past three minutes of her life playing peek-a-boo with a demonic creature from hell. It's _not_ fun. But hey, as long as the boys are safe, it's worth it.

She taps on the glass. The Devourer leers at her.

Then, she hears the Promethean coming, and she runs for the telephone booth, gesturing for the Devourer to follow her. (She's not sure if he does.) She hides inside the booth. Her nervous breath mists the glass. _I'm not scared. They said they'd save me. Besides, I can do just fine on my own._

These are the thoughts she comforts herself with as the Promethean approaches.

 

"Are you _kidding_ me?" spits Joey. _Nope._ He's not doing it. He's done a lot, but he is _not_ touching these bowls of disgustingness that are supposedly soup. He'd rather risk death by the lieutenants than put that stuff in his mouth.

Tyler shrugs. "You get that side, I'll get this side."

"Tyler." Joey doesn't think that Tyler understands. There are _body parts_ in the soup. It's probably stuffed to the brim with all kinds of diseases. They could get sick! "I'm _not_ eating this nasty freakin' soup!"

"There's no time."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Andrea's waiting. She could be—"

Joey fishes an eye out of one of the bowls. "There's a _freakin'_ eyeball in this!"

"We have to be—"

The Devourer enters the room. Joey drops the eyeball and scurries into hiding. "Get under the table," he says to Tyler. "Get under the table."

They huddle together under the dining room table. Joey can hear Tyler's breathing; the blonde is clearly trying to keep himself calm. Joey himself, on the other hand, feels like every inch of his skin is on fire with fright. _Don't let him find us. Whatever happens,_ please _don't let him find us._

The Devourer slams a hand against the table.

_If he looks down, we're dead._

After prowling around the dining room for two minutes, the Devourer finally leaves. As soon as he's gone, Joey jumps to his feet. "I'm going to close the door."

Tyler's face scrunches into a worried expression. "What does that mean for Andrea?"

Joey quietly pulls the door shut.

"We have to be quick," says Tyler.

"We can't let that happen again." Joey, incensed by the Devourer's attack, grabs a chair and uses it to barricade the door. "He is _not_ getting in here."

"That's not...that's not...that's...don't do that..." whimpers Tyler while Joey creates their defense system. "Don't...can you just leave it...let's just...don't do...okay. You're making so much noise. Okay. Jesus Christ."

 

Andrea is trapped in the phone booth, face-to-face with the Promethean. He puts his hands against the glass. She stoically stares back at him, unwilling to let him see a trace of fear, but on the inside, she's having an anxiety attack.

_What if he gets me? What if they don't save me? What if this is the end?_

 

Tyler stands up, examines the array of soup bowls, and turns to Joey. "You get that side, I'll get this side." _We gotta get it done, Joey. Don't complain. You'll only slow us down if you complain._

Joey complains anyway. "This looks disgusting!"

"Andrea could be dead right now," Tyler reminds him.

"Okay." Thankfully, this gets through to Joey. "You're right. You're right. You're right."

But as Tyler picks up a spoon, he can't get Andrea out of his mind. "We only have five minutes to save her if she's gotten." Since the Devourer showed up, Andrea must've failed to distract it, which could mean that she's been captured by one of the lieutenants. To make matters worse, Tyler's lost track of how long they've been in here. Time might've already run out for Andrea Russett.

_Don't be dead, Andrea. Please don't be dead. You and Joey are all I have left here._

Joey and Tyler eat soup. It tastes just as bad as it looks, but Tyler forces himself to swallow a spoonful from each plate he comes across. On the other side of the table, Joey is gagging.

"Omigod," says Tyler. "That's not good."

"Oh gosh, my first one with a bone," groans Joey.

Tyler tries a taste of the next bowl in line. "Sour."

Joey eats some bone soup, then immediately coughs it back up.

 _This is ridiculous._ "Good God, get a grip, girl!" _We've been through a lot worse than this. If you can't eat a few spoonfuls of soup without making a production out of it, then you need to remember that our_ lives _are at stake. Not to mention the fate of the world as we know it._

"Can I take at least the jaw out?" Joey asks, tossing said jaw aside.

They keep eating. Tyler shudders at the taste, but he thinks of his dead friends and powers through every bite. "We're _so_ close."

Joey's coughing again.

Tyler wants to slap him. He opens his mouth to say _we didn't lose Alex, Tana, Liza, and everyone else just to fail now, so stop acting like a baby and eat your damn soup,_ but all he manages to say is "we didn't lose" before the Devourer starts banging on the door.

Suddenly, Tyler is grateful for Joey's stupid chair maneuver.

 

Andrea peers at the Promethean through the window of the phone booth, and she tries not to think about what happened to poor Gabbie. _Go away,_ her soul is pleading. _Please, just go away._

Much to her relief, he does.

Once the coast is clear, she sneaks out of the phone booth and runs back inside. She can only hope that she finds the Devourer before he finds her friends.

 

"I think we're good," Joey whispers. "I locked the door with a chair." He turns his attention to the next bowl of soup, and his stomach moans in protest at the sight. "Omigosh, Tyler, this looks like it has freakin' _mold_...it has a _thumb_...it has..." He nearly barfs.

"You're gonna love it!" chirps Tyler. "Gluten free!"

 

When Andrea comes across the Devourer, he's at the door of the dining room. She whistles at it. "Hey, I'm in your house!"

He storms towards her.

"Come out of your house," she giggles nervously as she runs back outside. "You guys! Hurry up!"

 

Tyler hears Andrea's voice, and his heart soars. _She's still alive._ "Andrea's going through it!"

Joey is still being a baby, but at least he's eating the soup.

They're almost done. Joey dry heaves into one of his bowls, and Tyler says "I know" in a sympathetic voice. He doesn't feel too good himself, but he's already puked once tonight, and he'd rather not throw up a second time. Besides, he's not the same person he was back then.

Joey's face turns green.

Tyler chokes down the final spoonful. "That's it." He wipes his mouth. The seal is going to break soon...hopefully.

 

Andrea's Devourer distraction efforts have proven dangerous, and now she's being chased down the hall. "You guys!" she screams. _The dining room...I gotta get there before he gets me..._

 

"I think she got captured," Joey gulps.

Tyler starts to say something, but Andrea's cries of "I don't know what to do or where to go!" drown him out. _On second thought,_ thinks Joey, _she might still be free after all. Either way, we gotta get to her._

"Omigod!" Tyler points at the wall where the seal once was. "It's gone!"

So it is.

As if their victory wasn't amazing enough, Andrea walks into the dining room, still alive. Tyler perks up as soon as he sees her. "Andrea!" He shows off a clue. "Look!"

"Omigod," she gasps.

_The final seal lies on the water._

"The pool," says Andrea.

Tyler nods. "It's gotta be the pool."

To be honest, Joey isn't so sure about that. "It could also be the pond," he tells them.

Andrea takes in her surroundings. "What _is_ this?"

"There's the pool and the pond," Joey continues.

"This was a dinner," says Tyler to Andrea, gesturing to what remains of their awful meal. "The dinner we came for." The bitterness in his words is obvious, and Joey's stomach twists with guilt.

"I think I just ran a mile," pants Andrea.

Tyler sounds exasperated and relieved at the same time. "Well, thank you for coming. I thought you had died!"

"Thanks for coming to save me," she replies sarcastically.

"We just finished," Tyler responds, "just when you screamed."

The Devourer interrupts their argument by showing up, forcing the reunited group to stampede out the door. "Go, go, go!" yells Joey, pushing his friends ahead of him.

"That guy's there!" shouts Andrea once they reach the foyer. "That guy's there."

They run down the hallway, through the parlor, and out the door. Joey's grown tired of running.

 

"We have to go to the pool," hisses Tyler. His stomach is apparently stronger than it was five hours ago, since it's no longer hurting from the horrible soup he just ate.

"Okay," says Joey. "Let's go."

They run down the patio, but are forced to go the other way when they encounter the Promethean _again._ Cash is also visible below them. There are _so_ many lieutenants on their tail, and Tyler knows that they're going to have to get rid of them if they want to see the sun again.

They hide in an alcove, but they can still see the back of the Promethean's head.

"Anyone up here on this here patio?" barks Cash. "I sure hope so. I'm lonely downstairs."

 _Screw you._ Tyler doesn't like Confederates, but he hates _this_ Confederate most of all.

The Promethean is dead ahead. Joey and Andrea emerge from hiding and race past the robotic creature, and Tyler, who wants to stick together from now on, follows them. As he runs, the Promethean lunges for him, and only a well-timed jump saves him from capture. _If I still had my coat on, he would've gotten me,_ he realizes with a shudder.

"Run, run, run." His voice doesn't have enough energy to shout. "To the pool!"

They reach the pool.

"The final seal lies on the water," Tyler recites, but there are no seals on the water of the pool.

Joey shakes his head. "It's not here."

"You guys, it has to be the pond," says Andrea. "It has to be the pond."

_At least we know where to look._

 

"Cash," squeaks Andrea. She can see the Confederate general from here. He can't see them, but she knows that it's only a matter of time.

"Come on." Joey starts running. "This way."

The three of them run for the pond. "I hear whispers," sneers Cash, his voice dripping with malicious bravado. "I hear 'em." The group rounds a corner, and Cash's triumphant "A-ha!" lets Andrea know that they've been spotted.

Joey turns pale. "He's coming!"

"I got 'em!" cackles Cash.

 _No!_ Andrea spots the telephone booth, which causes her to fumble her way back into her old hiding place. Joey joins her, as does Tyler, and Andrea finally has her answer to "how many people can fit inside a telephone booth." _Three. Kind of. It's_ very _cramped in here._

__

__

She can still hear Cash's voice. "I know you're close," he snickers.

Andrea can't move. Joey and Tyler are pressed against her like sardines in a can. She can hear both of their frantic heartbeats, and she's pretty sure that they can hear hers as well. This sucks. If she dies by suffocation in this too-small telephone booth, she's going to write a strongly worded letter to whoever's in charge around here.

But before that can happen, Cash's footsteps fade away, and they're free to leave the booth and continue their journey to the pond.

 

When they arrive at the pond, the third Leviathan seal shines on the water. Joey is ecstatic. They're almost done. Soon, they'll be able to free Riley, and the Sorceress will be stripped of her power. He can't _wait_ to see the look on her face when she realizes that they've defeated her.

They find a wooden chest under a nearby tree. Of course, there's also a note, which Andrea reads.

_I'm afraid this seal can only be broken by blowing the shit out of it. The trick is to take down the lieutenants at the same time. Place the dynamite in the pond and prep the detonator. Then, lure in the lieutenants and blow the seal. Good luck._

"Guys, this is the dynamite," says Joey, picking up the chest. "It's in here."

Andrea and Tyler both order him to "throw it in," which he does. Tyler prepares the detonator. The trap has been set. It's time for them to capture the lieutenants' attention.

"Over here!"

"Hello!"

"Hi! Over here! Come on!"

In no time at all, Cash and Atticus show up. "Drop it!" Cash orders the group, pointing his gun at them. "Don't even _think_ about it, boy."

Tyler detonates the dynamite. Both the werewolf and the Confederate are thrown backwards by the resulting blast of water. The seal is broken, and the two lieutenants are officially out of commission.

"We got it!" cheers Tyler.

Andrea points to a purple light that's only a few feet away from them. "The treehouse! The treehouse is right here."

"It's unlocked." Joey smiles. They're almost home. Soon, they'll be back in the modern world, and tonight will be nothing more than a painful memory. Soon, they'll be able to live their lives without fear.

He's looking forward to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Heroic rescues, villainous downfalls, and a plot twist that will break your heart.


	54. O Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They're almost done! Nothing can go wrong now! Right?

The group swings open the treehouse. Inside is a blonde girl in a glass box, just like the one from the painting. This is Riley. This is the child the Sorceress once was. This is the girl they have to save.

They open the box, and she is finally free.

"Who are you?" Tyler asks, despite the fact that he already knows who she is.

"You broke the seals," is her quiet but ecstatic response. "You did!" She touches Andrea's face and Joey's chest, as if she can't believe that they're real. Tyler wonders how long it's been since she saw a friendly face.

 _She's safe now._ He smiles. _And so are we. The Sorceress can't hurt us anymore._

 

The Sorceress doesn't understand. Everything was going perfectly a minute ago, and now, her beautiful portal is collapsing around her. "What is happening?!?" she screams into the night, but the night does not dignify her with a reply.

The link is broken. The portal disappears. The Devourer is sucked back into his own world.

She sinks to her knees, her power fading, her makeup running down her face thanks to the defeated tears she sheds. _"No..."_

 

"The Sorceress!" Riley cries. "I'm the source of her power! Now that I'm out, she'll be weak!" The frantically happy look in her eyes is slightly concerning to Andrea, but she's pretty sure that Riley is good, so she lets it slide.

"Okay," says Joey.

"So what do we do?" Tyler asks.

Joey's voice is confused but hopeful. "How do we defeat her?"

Riley doesn't seem to be listening to either of them. "She will know the pain that I have felt all these years!" Before anyone can stop her, she takes off running.

"Wait, wait, wait!" stammers Andrea, who is quite taken aback at this turn of events. "Stop her. Stop her. What is she doing?"

"Follow her!" suggests Joey, so they do.

The girl sprints out of the treehouse and towards the house, screaming like a vengeful banshee all the way. The YouTubers run after her, shouting "Wait!" and "Hold up!" but she's not paying attention to them.

Andrea is running out of breath. "She's _so_ fast! Who the hell _is_ this girl?"

They reach the patio. Riley has stopped dead in her tracks. The Promethean is in front of her, about to strike her down, when Jetpack Girl appears out of nowhere. "Not so fast, asshole!" she snaps, and she fires two rounds into the robotic creature's chest. He falls to the ground, where she shoots him one last time, causing him to sputter his way into death.

"Good job, Jetpack Girl!" Tyler cheers.

Andrea thinks of a girl with multicolored hair who didn't deserve to die, and she smiles. _Gabbie's been avenged._

 

Riley runs into the house. The three YouTubers, along with Jetpack Girl, follow her inside. "Wait!" calls Joey. "Be careful." He doesn't want anyone else to get hurt, especially not when they're so close to the end.

"The Sorceress is somewhere," says Tyler.

The Sorceress, as it turns out, is lying on the stairs, apparently dead or unconscious. The Crown of Oblivion is next to her, ripe for the taking.

_Someone needs to break the curse..._

Joey approaches the stairs. "Should I get it?"

"No!" Tyler shakes his head. "Joey, wait!"

But Joey's head is already flooded with thoughts of 2017. His world. His family. His friends. Daniel.

_We can go home now._

The Savant reaches for the crown. "Okay," he whispers, a genuine smile beginning to form on his face for the first time in hours. "I got it." _I'll get us out of this mess. I'll make things right. I'll—_

The Sorceress roars back to life, pulls out a knife, and stabs him.

_Shane Dawson, poisoned. Andrea Brooks, gassed to death. Justine Ezarik, buried alive. GloZell Green, killed by a murder journal._

He staggers backwards, reeling from the sting of the Sorceress's knife. She stabs him again, and he tries to form coherent thoughts through his pain, but all he can think of are names of friends he lost long ago.

_Sierra Furtado, died during an exorcism. Matt Haag, poisoned. Timothy DeLaGhetto, shot himself. Lele Pons, electrocuted._

Tyler's voice screams a collection of words, but Joey can't hear what he's saying. He can't hear _anything_ anymore.

_Lauren Riihimaki, eaten by vampires. Jesse Wellens, eaten by Jorogumo. DeStorm Power, shot with an arrow. Liza Koshy, throat slit._

He collapses. The Sorceress stabs him once more. He's somehow still holding the crown.

_Tana Mongeau, stomach sliced open. Gabbie Hanna, heart ripped out. Alison, torn apart by werewolves. Alex Wassabi, stabbed to death._

Everything around him fades to white. One last name shines before him, and he knows from the bottom of his failing heart that he will never see his home again.

_Joey Graceffa..._

 

Joey Graceffa is dead.

Tyler stares at his corpse with broken eyes. _It can't be._ They were _so_ close to getting out of this place without another death, and now, his pinky-promise ally has fallen victim to the evil of the house.

_"I don't want it to be us. Promise?"_

_"Promise."_

Stupid crown. Stupid Sorceress. Stupid Joey. Stupid death.

As Tyler, Andrea, and Jetpack Girl attempt to recover from the shock of what they've just witnessed, Riley dashes forward, grabs the knife that the Sorceress dropped, and uses it to slit their enemy's throat. The Sorceress's body falls to the floor.

Tyler and Andrea gasp. Jetpack Girl's eyes grow wide.

Riley gazes at the bloody knife in her hands, drops it, and begins to cry quietly.

Tyler finds the strength to speak. "Is she dead?"

"Yes," sobs Riley.

Then, a force beyond his comprehension draws Tyler to the Crown of Oblivion, like a magnet attracting a paper clip. "Tyler, be careful," warns Andrea, but he doesn't hear her. He picks up the crown.

Through the grief and the pain, nine familiar voices whisper their blessings into his mind. _This is yours, Tyler Oakley. The spell is yours to break._

He wears the crown. They're there, above him, giving him the strength he needs to save this place from the demons that it holds. Magic pulses through his body. The crown's gems shine like starlight. He closes his eyes, and the love in his heart completely overwhelms his fading fear.

_Lauren Riihimaki. Jesse Wellens. DeStorm Power. Liza Koshy. Tana Mongeau. Gabbie Hanna. Alison. Alex Wassabi. Joey Graceffa._

They live on within him. They have not died in vain.

The light from the Crown of Oblivion travels through the house, expelling the curse from every nook and cranny. Andrea, Riley, and Jetpack Girl stare in awe at the sight.

Tyler Oakley, former Thespian and current wielder of the Crown of Oblivion, smiles. He is alive. He will return to 2017, and he will make sure that those who died tonight are not forgotten. He hopes that they're proud of the man he has become.

 

At last, the spell is broken. Andrea and Tyler are free to leave the house and return to the life they knew before.

But is it worth it? They've lost so much. They've even lost their host, Joey, who was _so close_ to seeing home again. The sight of his lifeless body on the floor is enough to break Andrea's heart.

So instead, she looks at Tyler. At least _he's_ still alive. Not only that, but he just single-handedly broke the spell. She never would've expected such badassery from the boy who started out a terrified mess...and yet, she can tell that he's still the good-hearted young man he was at the beginning of the night.

Jetpack Girl holds Riley's hand. "You can come with me," she assures the traumatized girl. "It'll be okay."

They leave together.

"Is it over?" Andrea asks once they're gone. The hardened, distrustful part of her expects another last-minute catastrophe to happen.

"I don't know." Tyler kneels at Joey's side. His smile has been replaced with a devastated expression. "We _can't_ leave him like this."

They find two coffins in the ballroom. One is used as a final resting place for Lauren Riihimaki, the night's first casualty. (Andrea can't help but notice the pain in Tyler's eyes as he pays his respects to the Engineer.) The other is dragged into the hallway, where it's used to provide Joey Graceffa with a better grave than the cold stone floor.

(As for the Sorceress, Tyler insists that she must be thrown to the vultures outside. Andrea does not debate this logic.)

Tyler takes off the Crown of Oblivion and places it on Joey's head. Andrea remembers thinking that the crown would look better on her, but now, she has no such thoughts. Now, all she wants is for Joey to open his eyes and live again...but she knows better than to believe in fairy tales.

She sighs. "Let's go home." She takes a deep breath and closes the coffin on Joey forever.

Together, she and Tyler walk out of the house. Morning has broken. The sun that Andrea feared she'd never see again bathes the world in beautiful, comforting light. She laughs with relief. "We did it." _I don't think_ anyone's _going to believe that we defeated a Sorceress._

Tyler grins back at her.

The two survivors of their party of ten walk forward into the dawn. As a Society Against Evil car arrives to take them home, Andrea Russett throws her arms around her last companion and cries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Joey. That's right. The protagonist is dead. Bet you didn't see _that_ coming, huh? But hey, at least Tyler and Andrea made it out okay!  
>  Next (and last) chapter: The final pieces fall into place. Also, Tyler and Andrea have massive PTSD, and the Escape the Night story is never truly over.


	55. Epilogue: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let me tell you what I wish I'd known/When I was young and dreamed of glory/You have no control/Who lives, who dies, who tells your story."  
> Or: The survivors begin the recovery process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The epilogue! It's in Tyler's POV, because he grew so much as a character over the course of the show. Not to knock Andrea, of course...hopefully I can give you some insight into what's going on with her as well.

The survivors of the Victorian era's death party are taken to a motel in 2017. Their driver, who introduces himself as Society Against Evil agent Bennett Richardson, claims that this is to help them "rest and recuperate" after the trauma they've endured. "It did wonders for the last group," he remarks, and Tyler's suspicions are confirmed: last year's massacre was a night just like the one he and Andrea survived.

 _Joey lived through it then,_ he thinks sadly, _but he couldn't do it a second time._

When they reach the motel, Andrea demands new clothes. She receives a nightgown, and as soon as she's changed into it, she hurls her Mystic attire out the window. Tyler, however, is content to sleep in what's left of his Thespian outfit. It's the outfit he almost died in, after all.

He lies down, clutches a pillow to his chest, and slips into sleep. Everything will be better in the morning.

 

They've been missing for three months.

That's the first thing they're told by Bennett Richardson, and the information takes them both by surprise. Three months? It was _one night._ How could a night have lasted three months? And how on earth are they going to explain that night to a bewildered world?

They are told not to worry. The Society Against Evil has prepared a cover story. Furthermore, they were able to recover seven bodies from the Victorian era, which Tyler is extremely happy to hear about. They even found Alex. They won't tell them _how_ they got him out of the Dark Dimension, but at least his family will be able to give him a proper funeral. At least that's one less weight on Tyler's conscience.

But one body could not be recovered.

 _"How?"_ Andrea screams. _"How_ did you not find Joey? He was _right there!"_

Tyler nods. "A coffin. In the hallway. You couldn't have missed it..."

"There was a coffin," explains Bennett Richardson in husky tones, "but there was no body inside. We looked everywhere. We can only assume that someone made off with the corpse." He sighs. "Because of this, Joey will not be included in our cover story."

"What do you mean?" Tyler asks.

"He's not dead. Not officially. And he wasn't with you guys. He is still missing, and will be until further notice."

"That's not fair—"

"It's how it has to be."

Tyler sighs and signs the confidentiality statement in front of him. It isn't like he has much of a choice. Hopefully, they'll find the scumbag who stole Joey's body, and the Graceffas can finally get some closure. God knows they need it.

 

The two YouTubers are taken to the police station, where they are escorted into a room of nine desperate families. Seven of those families will leave with tears in their eyes, mourning the loss of their children, siblings, parents, and lovers. But for the other two families, there is a happy ending.

Andrea is mobbed by her parents, her brother, and her sister. She hugs each of them in turn, her calm demeanor vanishing into an ocean of blubbered tears. Tyler, meanwhile, finds himself in the grateful arms of his own family.

"You're okay," sniffles his mother, holding him close to her. "You're safe. I'm here. I got you. They're not gonna hurt you anymore."

His father is too emotional to say anything other than Tyler's name, but his embrace conveys the message of love and regret that he's trying to get across. His siblings take turns smothering him in hugs, kisses, and welcoming words.

In this moment, Tyler feels _so_ lucky to be alive.

 

This time, the Society's story is that the nine YouTubers were kidnapped by a madwoman who called herself "the Sorceress." They say that she was a follower of Arthur Stewart, the man responsible for the first "incident," and that she was intent on finishing his work. She succeeded in ending the lives of seven of her captives, all while harboring delusions of power and control that would put anyone in a mental institution.

But there is no need to worry, insists the Society. They "took care of her" when they rescued Tyler and Andrea. They destroyed Arthur's legacy. This will never happen again.

The world believes them.

Tyler and Andrea aren't so sure.

 

Six funerals come and go in quick succession. Andrea only attends five (she has a panic attack at the thought of going to Tana's, and Tyler decides not to press the issue), but Tyler dutifully attends all six. _I have to be there for them,_ he tells himself every time he forces himself into a black outfit. _I have to make sure that people know their story._

So he goes. He speaks at Liza's, and he tells the group of mourners how much the little brown girl meant to him. He lays a bouquet of white roses on Tana's grave. He offers his condolences to DeStorm's son Tayvion, because even _DeStorm_ deserved better than what he got.

But the hardest, most painful funeral that Tyler has to sit through is a double one. The families of Alex and Lauren have decided that their children, who loved each other so much, should be buried together, so two white coffins are lowered into the ground as the last leaves of autumn fall around them. Tyler sobs openly the whole time. "This shouldn't be happening," he cries, though his voice is too soft for anyone else to hear him. "They should be here. They _all_ should still be here."

Alex's mother reassures him that it's not his fault. Tyler doesn't know if he believes her.

Halfway through the service, as the officiant rambles on about eternal love and whatnot, Tyler catches a glimpse of Roi Fabito (formerly Roi Wassabi) in the second row. The other half of the old Wassabi Productions stares straight ahead, his eyes lifeless, his hands shaking, as if he's unable to process the tragedy that has befallen his old friend. Tyler's heart falls to pieces at the sight.

To make matters worse, Joey Graceffa gets no funeral at all. Tyler and Andrea create a makeshift memorial for him out of sticks and flowers, but it's not the same. It's not what Joey deserves. Joey deserves to be mourned and remembered, just like everyone else, and Tyler wants the chance to tell his story.

 

After a month of nightmares and tears, Tyler gets a call from Eva Gutowski. "Tyler." Her voice is laced with buried pain. "It _wasn't_ a serial killer, right? It was an ancient, unspeakable evil, and you voted friends into death games..."

"How do you know?" Tyler asks.

"It wasn't a serial killer for our group, either."

Tyler already knows this, of course. "I'm sorry" is all he can bring himself to say.

"You and Andrea should meet me and Oli at the Starbucks near my house," she replies. "The four of us have a _lot_ to talk about."

 

Within the confines of a Victorian coffin, the Crown of Oblivion grants an anguished soul a second chance at life. The center gem glows. Joey Graceffa's eyes fly open, and he breathes.

He is alive.

Somehow, he has returned.

He can only hope that the evil has not returned with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end.  
> ...oh, who am I kidding! This isn't even _close_ to the end!  
>  I gotta let Season 3 play out to give myself a break, but after that... **Escape the Night: A Continuation,** coming soon to Archive Of Our Own!


End file.
